No Such Thing As Love

Latest Episodes:

Impressive Pelvic Floor Jan 27, 2021

Show notes

While Jessie counts down the days to finding herself again, Claire jumps in pelvis first to educating herself on all things sex. The ladies also talk about their latest hobby of shopping together over zoom, redoing their apartments, bruised breasts, yoni eggs, and making sure everyone sees them when walking in a room. You better believe they're doing the most important exercise as you read this. It starts with a K and ends with an egel.

Kissy Kissy Jan 20, 2021

Show notes

How old is too old for a hickey? Don't ask Claire's age because she has a red blotchy souvenir from her latest walkabout stop. Thankfully, she spills all the tea from her the low chemistry, bruise inducing escapade. Then Jessie talks through the needed but inevitably disappointing text she sent to Mr Bagel. The ladies also discuss cuddling, childhood games in the bedroom, vomit in a shoe, and how they celebrated National Fetish Day by attending a seminar with Babeland. The most important lesson is there are many flavors of ice cream and you should feel free to try any flavor you want!

For Our Health Jan 13, 2021

Show notes

Jessie and Claire are really focused on their health and that's why they're having sex with strangers and considering smoking cigarettes. This week, the ladies talk about butt stuff, a slip of the finger, and wiping. Also, their latest FaceTime dates, seeing ghosts, the hottie Bachelor, bunnies, and their new favorite holiday that's right around the corner, National Nothing Day.

We Are Fashion Jan 06, 2021

Show notes

After a binge watch of Stylish with Jenna Lyons, the ladies are rebirthed like phoenix rising from the athleisure ashes. They are now fashion. And with their new prestige, they're ready to get back on the apps. Jessie leaves Mr Bagel behind as she bounces back with Bumble. Claire wades through Feeld for her next escapade after revisiting an old flame. They laugh about their flirting differences and long for the next time they can pretend they're going to go up to a guy in a bar.

Hacky Sackin' New Year Dec 30, 2020

Show notes

That's a wrap on 2020 and maybe a wrap on Mr Bagel? Jessie shares the latest in her relationship status and Claire unwraps the heavy emotional discoveries she had while visiting the Covid capital, Tennessee. Jessie questions Claire's athletic ability and Claire warns Jessie to not put too many expectations on the coming year. They both share a few resolutions for 2021 and decide it's going to be a very good, not great, year. Setting some real expectations.

Naughty and Nice Dec 23, 2020

Show notes

Reporting from the Hurt Hole, Jessie gives us as update after she was flying high with optimism last week. Claire's delicate constitution required she take a quick break from her walkabout. Then the ladies decide who and what from the year deserves lumps of coal or bunches of candy canes in their cool new clogs. Can you guess who gets the coal out of Taylor Swift, reality TV, and sexting? Listen to find out.

New Attitudes Dec 16, 2020

Show notes

Occasionally we have to spiral to the bottom to see a new perspective and that's exactly what Jessie needed to do. Jessie and Claire talk about her effort to understand both sides of a situation and switching from dating mode to relationship mode. Claire shares an update on the first pitstop in her sexual walkabout. It felt like a time warp during their conversation and not because it flowed easily. Sometimes you have to put in the work for a semi-ok time.

Sexual Walkabout Dec 09, 2020

Show notes

Pack up your trail mix, water bottle, & condoms; it's time for a sexual walkabout! Claire decided she can't handle the emotional labor of dating right now but she does have some homework to do in the bedroom. The ladies get down and dirty about their intimate history and emotional detachment from doing the deed. Jessie is also figuring out how to manage disappointment while appreciating the growth it forces. And they wonder if a lot of their intimacy issues were caused from both of their mothers whisper spelling S.E.X. in their formative years.

Ready for Our Meet Cute with writer Lana Schwartz Dec 02, 2020

Show notes

Tis the season for meet cutes, grand gestures, and unrealistic expectations. The ladies are joined by Build Your Own Romantic Comedy author, Lana Schwartz to dish all about the genre we love and love to hate. But first, Jessie and Claire chat about being an angry host, dressing for yourself, and popping delusional dreams. Claire is also positive she has toxoplasmosis so she can't be held responsible for her poor decisions.

Temperature Change Nov 25, 2020

Show notes

Tis the season to be thankful. But before that, Jessie & Claire chat sweater collections, exes returning, being left behind, Mr Bagel’s prophecy text, and then 3 things they’re thankful for.

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