More than Roommates

Latest Episodes:

Episode 150 - Your Words Build or Break (feat. Dave & Ann Wilson) Oct 14, 2025

Show notes

FamilyLife Today hosts Dave & Ann Wilson join Scott & Gabrielle to talk about Ann’s new book, How to Speak Life to Your Husband When All You Want to Do Is Yell at Him—and why a wife’s voice carries unique power. We cover practical ways to shift from critique to encouragement, how prayer re-wires our minds, and how both spouses can speak truth in love without tearing each other down.

Scriptures:

Genesis 3

Proverbs 18:21

James 3:1-12

Romans 12:2

Resources:

Book – Ann Wilson, with Davd Wilson - How to Speak Life to Your Husband: When All You Want to Do Is Yell at Him

Dave & Ann’s podcast – FamilyLife Today

Follow Dave & Anne on Instagram

Questions to Discuss:

1. When you think about the tone of your home lately, do your words feel more like “life” or more like “boo”? Give specific examples—gently.

2. What is one concrete way you can speak life to your spouse this week (phrase, text, public praise in front of the kids, written note, etc.)?

3. How can you start (or restart) praying together in a way that’s realistic—time of day, length, and format (out loud, texted prayer, voicemail)?

Episode 149 - Breaking the Sex Recession at Home: Hope for Intimacy in Marriage Oct 07, 2025

Show notes

In this episode of More Than Roommates, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott have a candid, biblical conversation about the “sexless marriage”—why it happens, how pornography, busyness, medical issues, and poor communication play a role, and what couples can do to rebuild connection. They offer practical steps so you can move from roommates back to one-flesh intimacy.

Questions to Discuss:

1. In our season right now, does sex feel more like a thermometer (just reporting our temperature) or a thermostat (able to change it)? Why?

2. When was the last time we each felt truly pursued and enjoyed by the other? What specific actions helped?

3. What would make it safer for us to share desires, preferences, and fears about sex?

4. How can we renew the covenant this week in a way that is tender, unhurried, and mutually honoring?

Scriptures:

Ephesians 4:27

1 Corinthians 7:3-5

Resources:

Book - Secrets of Sex and Marriage: 8 Surprises That Make All the Difference by Shaunti Feldhahn & Michael Sytsma

Article – The Sex Recession

Book – Reconnected – Greg & Erin Smalley

More Than Roommates Interviews with Juli Slattery – Surrendered Sexuality & Sexual Abuse

Episode 148 - One Wallet, One Flesh: Why Joint Finances Build Trust Sep 30, 2025

Show notes

Many couples treat money like “yours” and “mine,” but Scripture calls us to live as “one flesh”—and that includes our finances. In this episode Derek, Garielle, and Scott talk about joint accounts, transparency, and simple rhythms that move you from roommates to true financial intimacy.

Scriptures:

Genesis 2:24

Psalm 24:1

Psalm 50:10

Questions to Discuss:

1. Do you and your spouse share food?

2. Why does it matter whether you merge your bank accounts or not?

3. When you hear “one flesh financially,” what excites you and what scares you? Why?

4. If you keep (or want) separate accounts, what heart-level reasons are driving that (control, fear, secrecy, past hurt, convenience)?

5. What weekly or bi-weekly money rhythm would help us communicate (budget review, giving/prayer, upcoming expenses, savings goals)?

Resources:

Watermark - Moneywise Ministry Resources

Ramsey - Financial Peace University

Episode 147 - Marriage Isn’t Just Hard—Finding Gladness Together Sep 23, 2025

Show notes

Marriage is often described as hard—but it’s also one of God’s greatest gifts of joy. In this episode, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott share biblical wisdom, stories, and practical ways to cultivate gladness, gratitude, and fun in your marriage.

Scriptures:

1 Cor 7:28

John 16:33

MT 7:24-27

John 10:10

Discussion Questions:

1. What small things bring joy and laughter into your marriage right now?

2. Are there habits you’ve let go of (like creative dates or playful traditions) that you want to bring back?

3. How can you speak more positively about your marriage to others—without ignoring the hard parts?

4. What’s one practical step you can take this week to pursue gladness together?

Resources:

Book - Anatomy of an Affair: How Affairs, Attractions, and Addictions Develop, and How to Guard Your Marriage Against Them, by Dave Carder

Book – The Ready or Knot Prayer Guide, by Scott Kedersha

Episode 146 - Surrendered Sexuality (feat. Juli Slattery) Sep 16, 2025

Show notes

In this episode of More Than Roommates, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott welcome back Dr. Juli Slattery to discuss her newest book, Surrendered Sexuality. Together they unpack why sexual struggles are always spiritual struggles, how identity in Christ transforms intimacy, and what it looks like to invite God into this vulnerable area of marriage

Scriptures:

Psalm 139:7-8

Romans 12:1-2

Resources:

Juli’s book – Surrendered Sexuality: How Knowing Jesus Changes… Everything

Episode 127 – Healing From Sexual Abuse (feat. Juli Slattery)

Juli’s Ministry and Podcast - Authentic Intimacy, Java with Juli

Questions to Discuss:

1. Do you find it difficult to invite God into conversations about sex and intimacy in your marriage? Why or why not?

2. How does culture influence the way you and your spouse think about sex? In what ways do you need to realign with a biblical mindset?

3. What’s one part of your life—or marriage—you’ve struggled to surrender to Jesus?

Episode 145 - The Truth About “Don’t Go to Bed Angry” Sep 09, 2025

Show notes

In this episode, the More Than Roommates team tackles one of the most quoted—and misunderstood—marriage verses: “Don’t let the sun go down on your anger.” They unpack what Ephesians 4:26 really means, why staying up until 2 a.m. fighting isn’t always wise, and practical ways to resolve conflict quickly without giving the enemy a foothold in your marriage.

Scriptures:

Ephesians 4:25-27

Ephesians 4:3

Romans 12:18

Questions to Discuss:

1. What are your sleeping habits as a couple?

2. How have you as a couple interpreted “Don’t let the sun go down on your anger” in your marriage? Has it helped or hurt you?

3. When you're in conflict late at night, what’s your agreed-upon plan—keep talking, or hit pause and revisit?

4. What “pre-decisions” could you make (e.g., never sleeping on the couch in anger) to protect unity in your relationship?

5. Are there busy schedules or commitments keeping you from connecting before the late-night hours? If so, what changes could you make?

Episode 144 - Before You Say “I Do”: Why Living Together Isn’t God’s Best Sep 02, 2025

Show notes

In this episode of More Than Roommates, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott talk about cohabitation and whether couples should live together before marriage (Hint: the answer is “no”). We discuss the dangers of acting like a married couple before you make the covenant commitment marriage requires.

Scriptures:

Hebrews 13:4

Romans 12:1-2

Genesis 2:24-25

1 Corinthians 6:18

John 4

Ephesians 5:15

Questions to Discuss:

1. How do you think our culture’s view of living together before marriage differs from God’s design?

2. How have you seen “playing married” cause harm — in your own story or in others’?

3. If you lived together before marriage, what conversations of repentance, grace, or reflection might be helpful now?

4. How can we lovingly encourage friends or family members who are considering living together before marriage?

Resources:

Relationship DUI Video

Episode 143 - Making Marriage Easier (feat. Arlene Pellicane) Aug 26, 2025

Show notes

Author and speaker Arlene Pellicane joins the More Than Roommates team to talk about her new book Making Marriage Easier and the four simple decisions that can transform your relationship. From practicing gratitude to setting tech boundaries, Arlene offers practical, biblical, and fun ways to move from “just roommates” to a thriving marriage.

Scriptures:

Gen 1:28

Gen 2:24

1 Thess 5:16-18

Questions to Discuss:

1. How can you and your spouse better cultivate a culture of gratitude in your marriage?

2. Which of the four decisions—play by the rules, give thanks, serve your spouse, take fun seriously—comes most naturally to you, and which is most challenging?

3. How has technology helped or hurt your connection as a couple? What boundaries might help protect your relationship?

4. When was the last time you had truly fun, joyful time together? How can you make that more regular?

Resources:

Arlene’s latest book - Making Marriage Easier: How to Love (and Like) Your Spouse for Life

Follow Arlene on Instagram

Arlene’s Website: ArlenePellicane.com and Making Marriage Easier site.

Arlene’s Podcast – Happy Home Podcast

Episode 142 - Check Engine Light for Your Relationship: A Guide to Staying Healthy Aug 19, 2025

Show notes

Every marriage has warning lights—subtle indicators that something needs attention. In this episode of More Than Roommates, Scott, Derek, and Gabrielle talk through four key warning signs to watch for in your marriage and practical ways to address them before they turn into bigger problems.

Scriptures:

1 Peter 3:7

PR 27:12

Galatians 6:7-8

1 Cor 6:18

1 Cor 10:12

Questions to Discuss:

1. When was the last time you and your spouse laughed together? What could you do this week to create more fun moments?

2. How connected do you feel to your spouse right now on a scale of 1–10? What would help you move up one point?

3. Are there any unresolved conflicts between you that need to be addressed?

4. In what ways are you guarding your marriage against unhealthy boundaries with the opposite sex?

5. How are you growing spiritually together? What’s one step you can take this week to pursue God as a couple?

Resources:

Book - Making Marriage Easier, by Arlene Pellicane

MTR Episode 109 - Marriage Myth: We Think We’re Healthy Because We Don’t Fight (feat. Greg & Erin Smalley)

Episode 141 - Proactively Working On Your Marriage Aug 12, 2025

Show notes

Too many couples wait years before seeking help in their marriage—often after unhealthy patterns are deeply rooted. In this episode, Gabrielle, Derek, and Scott challenge listeners to fight that tendency by asking for help early, engaging in community, and regularly checking in with one another before problems really settle in.

Scriptures:

Proverbs 19:11

Proverbs 18:2

Eph 4:26-27

Questions to Discuss:

1. If you see something broken in your house, what do you do?

2. Are there any “small cracks” in our marriage we’ve been ignoring?

3. What keeps us from asking for help—pride, fear, apathy, comparison?

4. What’s one way we can bring others into our marriage to speak life and truth?