Mentally Stronger with Therapist Amy Morin

Latest Episodes:

353 — The Hidden Childhood Wound Behind the Relationships You Keep Ending Up In with Trauma Therapist Dr. Gillian O'Shea Brown Sep 21, 2026

Show notes

Have you ever wondered why you attract the same type of person over and over or wondered why you keep ending up in the same situation? You might tell yourself you never want to change but end up right back in a similar situation again.

My guest today says there's a reason for that. Every one of us has what she calls a psychological Achilles heel — a tender spot formed early in life around a belief like I'm not lovable or I'm not good enough — and it lies dormant until something or someone presses on it. And we're often unconsciously drawn to the people who press on it, because part of us is trying to go back and finally get it right.

My guest is Dr. Gillian O'Shea Brown, a psychotherapist and complex trauma specialist who authored the textbook Healing Complex PTSD, used at NYU graduate schools.

Some of the things we discuss are:

What a psychological Achilles heel is and why it lies dormant until the wrong person or situation presses on it
Why we unconsciously seek out the people who reopen our oldest wounds
Why your brain will pick familiar chaos over unpredictable peace and how that shows up in dating
Why the butterflies you feel around certain people were never really about attraction
The I AM inventory that reveals who you actually become around specific people
What your body is trying to tell you about the people you spend time with
The Erotic Emotional Map for tracing your relationship patterns back to their earliest source
Why "pruning" your relationships is only half the work and what to do with the empty space that scares most people back into old patterns
How to have the "updated conversations" most married couples never actually have
The Therapist's Take: My top three strategies for breaking the patterns that keep repeating in your life

249 — The Hidden Link Between Childhood Trauma and Chronic Health Issues with Dr. Aimie Apigian

302 — Why You Choose Familiar Pain Over Unfamiliar Peace (and How to Break Free From Those Patterns)

Links & Resources

⁠⁠Psyche's Awakening

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352 — Not Sad, Not Happy, Just... Nothing? Why You Feel Numb—and How to Come Back Sep 18, 2026

Show notes

Have you ever felt like you just don't feel anything at all? Not exactly sad, but not happy either. Something good happens and you think, well, that's nice. Something bad happens and you think, okay. And you move through your days feeling sort of flat.

That's emotional numbness. And while it might seem like a good thing to numb yourself to discomfort, there are some downsides to it too.

Some of the things I talk about are:

The winter I couldn't even feel the cold—and how the feeling came back so slowly I almost missed it.
The four different kinds of numb, and why the right response depends on which one you're in.
Why you can't selectively numb the hard feelings without dimming joy and excitement along with them.
The reason feeling numb leaves so many people exhausted—even though it seems like they're not doing anything at all.
Why the feelings you push down don't disappear—and how they resurface two years later in the grocery store.
Why coming back to life isn't a dam bursting, but a dimmer switch your brain controls on purpose.
Why chasing a big emotion (the sad movie, the old photos) often backfires and the small thing to reach for instead.
The "flicker" to watch for, and why motivation follows action here, not the other way around.

272 — How to Handle Big Emotions: 5 Science-Backed Skills to Stay in Control

332 — Should You Sit With Your Feelings or Change How You Feel? The One Question That Decides It

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351 — How to Build the Self-Worth You Need to Feel Good Enough (Without Faking It, Affirming It, or Achieving It) With Dr. Marisa Franco Sep 14, 2026

Show notes

Have you ever finally gotten something that you thought would make you feel worthy, like a degree or a promotion, and you still felt like you weren't good enough? Or maybe when someone gives you a genuine compliment, you feel worse instead of better.

My guest is Dr. Marisa Franco, a psychologist, professor at the University of Maryland, and New York Times bestselling author. And she says we've been lied to about what really builds self-worth. But the good news is, once we learn the truth, we can all increase our self-worth without achieving more.

Some of the things we discuss are:

Why compliments and success can actually feel threatening when you're struggling with self-worth
The difference between the two kinds of high self-esteem (and how to tell which one you actually have)
Why "I only date secure people" misses how humans actually work — and the case for being "secure-ish" instead
Why memories are the "database of self-esteem" — and how the brain uses your past to predict your future
How to go back to a painful memory and give your younger self exactly what they needed
Why you don't have to remember what happened to heal past wounds
The three-step framework to try the next time you feel bad about yourself
Healthy ways to handle hard feelings
The Therapist's Take: My top three strategies for building real self-worth starting today

Links & Resources

⁠Worth: The New Science of Self-Esteem and Secure Attachment

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350 — How to Stay Mentally Strong in the Age of AI Sep 11, 2026

Show notes

When's the last time you asked AI to help you with something personal? Maybe you pasted in a text message and asked what the person really meant by it. Maybe you laid out both sides of a hard decision and asked what you should do.

AI can be genuinely helpful for quick answers—but if you're not careful, it may be quietly draining your mental strength. I'm already seeing this unfold in my therapy office as people hand over more and more. And I fell into it myself, running my own emails through Claude before I realized I wasn't getting better information—I was just getting a stamp of approval. In today's episode, I'll explain how leaning on AI can weaken your ability to trust your own judgment, the three things you should never outsource to it, and the simple rule that protects your mind in the age of AI.

Some of the things I talk about are:

The moment I caught myself defaulting to a chatbot instead of my own voice—after decades of writing my own emails without a second thought.
The MIT study on what happens in your brain when you lean on AI to think for you—and the "cognitive debt" you rack up without noticing.
The one simple rule that changes everything about how you use AI (and why the order you do things matters more than you'd think).
Why asking AI about your feelings is really asking for permission to feel them—and the mental strength skill you lose when you do.
The friend who let AI choose between two jobs, moved across the country, and later couldn't explain how he'd made the decision.
Why AI is at its absolute weakest on the decisions that matter most about your life.
The woman whose relationship AI called "avoidant" one day and "securely attached" the next—and what it reveals about outsourcing your read on other people.
Why AI makes an old trap easier than ever: the friend who'd eventually push back at 3am, and the chatbot that never will.

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349 — 7 Uncomfortable Truths That Are Keeping You Stuck (And What to Do About Each One) With Psychotherapist Kier Gaines Sep 07, 2026

Show notes

Most people wait for the right moment, the right feeling, the right amount of information before they change. But my guest today says it all starts when you confront the seven uncomfortable truths that are holding you back.

My guest is Kier Gaines, a licensed professional counselor who reaches more than 40 million people on social media every month. His new book is It All Starts When You Do.

Some of the things we discuss are:

Why waiting for the right moment costs you the life you want
The difference between accountability and self-blame
Why self-awareness alone almost never leads to change (and what actually does)
The seven uncomfortable truths and why the first step isn't fixing them, it's getting curious about them
Why affirmations can make you feel worse
Why overwhelm is often a failure of systems, not a failure of your capabilities
The five stages of behavioral change and why knowing which one you're in changes what you should actually do next
Why "I only date healed people" misses how humans actually work
Why distress tolerance might be the single most important skill for growing mentally stronger
The Therapist's Take: My top three strategies for starting when you're not ready

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠86 — The 6 Stages of Change: How to Transform Your Life

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠332 — Should You Sit With Your Feelings or Change How You Feel? The One Question That Decides It⁠

Links & Resources

It All Starts When You Do

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348 — Still Cringing About Something You Did Years Ago? Here's Why (And How to Stop). Sep 04, 2026

Show notes

Is there a moment from your past that still makes you cringe? Something you said at a party years ago, a text you wish you could unsend, a version of you that you can't believe you ever were? And does that moment ever run through your mind when you don't wish to replay it?

In today's episode, I'll share a cringe moments that my brain loves to replay, explain why certain moments get cemented in there forever, and give you three strategies to move through them—so you can stop feeling the pain all over again and stop letting those memories shrink your life.

Some of the things I talk about are:

The on-camera interview I've never once been able to bring myself to watch—and the part I left out that still makes me cringe.
Why your brain files a social slip-up like a physical injury, and treats an awkward comment like a threat to your survival.
Why embarrassment and shame stick when almost every other bad feeling fades—and what that says about the moments you can't shake.
How replaying cringe can shrinks your life.
Why "cringe" may stem from three different feelings and why it's so important to label them correctly.
The reason your brain replays the worst four seconds on a loop instead of the whole scene—and how to change the story it's telling.
The "spotlight effect," and the research showing how badly we overestimate how many people even noticed.

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347 — The One Question That Will Tell You Whether Your Go-To Coping Skill Is Actually Helping You With Dr. Celeste Birkhofer Aug 31, 2026

Show notes

When something goes wrong in your day—bad news, a disagreement with a loved one, or a tough rejection—what do you actually reach for to cope?

Most of us have one move. We drink, we scroll, we run, we clean, we call someone. And it probably works—which is why we keep doing it.

But my guest today says that's where the trouble starts. Every coping strategy you have began as your best attempt at getting a need met. And when you only have one move, even a good one can turn into something that no longer serves you.

My guest is Dr. Celeste Birkhofer, a licensed clinical psychologist and adjunct clinical faculty at Stanford Medical School's Department of Psychiatry and Behavioral Sciences. Her new book is Beyond Quick Fixes.

Some of the things we discuss are:

Why your one go-to coping skill probably started as a solution — and how to tell when it's crossed into something that's costing you
The difference between a quick fix that helps you (like slow breathing when your heart is pounding) and one that's harming you
Why some of your greatest strengths—being driven, being independent, being agreeable—might also be the things holding you back
The two ingredients every real change requires (and why insight alone almost never gets you there)
Dr. Birkhofer's story of using food to cope in college — and how she traced it back to what she learned about handling emotions as a kid
The writing exercise that helps you connect the dots between your childhood and your current patterns without shame
The three parts of yourself and why one of them needs to be in the driver's seat
Why the people closest to you sometimes push back when you try to change and how to tell if they're drawing out your best or keeping you stuck
The Therapist's Take: My top three strategies for building coping skills that actually work

⁠⁠⁠330 — The Real Reason Your Coping Skills Aren't Helping (It's Not You)

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠332 — Should You Sit With Your Feelings or Change How You Feel? The One Question That Decides It

Links & Resources

Beyond Quick Fixes

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346 — How to Stop Taking Things So Personally (And Stop Giving Away Your Power) Aug 28, 2026

Show notes

Have you ever sent a text and expected a fun response but all you got was a word one answer and then you spent the rest of the day wondering what you did wrong? Or heard a comment in a group chat and felt it was aimed at you? Most of the time, the thing you're taking personally has almost nothing to do with you—but your brain will work hard to convince you otherwise.

I've done this too, during the hardest stretch of my life, even though I'm a therapist who teaches people not to. In today's episode, I'll walk you through what's really happening when you take something personally, why it costs you more than you might think, and three things you can do the next time your brain insists you're the reason someone acted the way they did.

Some of the things I talk about are:

The story I built about myself to explain what happened when I was grieving.
Why your brain reaches for the one explanation that puts you at the center, out of a hundred it could have picked.
What the research says about the critical feedback people give.
Why taking things personally goes beyond just feeling bad.
The surprising study on reaching out to someone you've lost touch with, and what your brain gets wrong about it.
How to separate hurt feelings from beliefs about yourself.

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Subscribe to The Mental Strength Newsletter —⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://amymorinlcsw.com/newsletter⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

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345 — How to Overcome Anxiety by Changing How You Use Your Imagination With Dr. Cassandra Vieten Aug 24, 2026

Show notes

You've probably been told that anxiety is a reaction to what's happening in your life. But my guest today says that's not the whole story. Most of your anxiety isn't a reaction to what's actually happening — it's a reaction to what you're imagining might happen.

You get an email that says "can we talk tomorrow?" and your mind writes an entire disaster. Your brain then releases the same stress hormones whether the threat is real or imagined.

My guest is Dr. Cassandra Vieten, a licensed clinical psychologist and director of research at the Arthur C. Clarke Center for Human Imagination at UC San Diego. Her new book is Imagine That.

Some of the things we discuss are:

Why you're imagining far more than you think — and how your brain reacts as if what you're imagining is actually happening
The Mark Twain quote about worry that will stop you in your tracks
Why "just think positive" backfires — and what to do with your imagination instead
Your imagination profile — why some people see vivid pictures, others hear narrated stories, and both are valid ways of imagining
How to visit your future self — and the surprising question to ask when you get there
How to tell the difference between rumination and imagination
The dragon-in-the-village metaphor Dr. Vieten uses for addiction — and why a good story can reach truths your logical mind can't
The Therapist's Take: My top three strategies for using your imagination to grow mentally stronger

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠318 — How to Turn Anxiety Into a Competitive Advantage With a 2-Minute Play That Tricks Your Brain

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠144 — 7 Surprising Strategies That Fix Anxiety (Even Though We Fear These Things Will Make Anxiety Worse)

Links & Resources

⁠Imagine That

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344 — 5 Reasons Imposter Syndrome Doesn't Go Away (And Why That's Usually a Good Sign) Aug 21, 2026

Show notes

Have you ever achieved something big and, instead of feeling proud, felt like an imposter? Imposter syndrome is common, yet no one wants to talk about it.

But imposter syndrome isn't necessarily a bad thing. And there are steps you can take when you experience it to ensure that it doesn't become an obstacle. Some of the things I talk about today are:

The invitation-only event I earned my way into—and how I still questioned if I belonged.
Why imposter syndrome doesn't go away even when you have concrete proof you are good at what you do.
The sneaky credit trap and why it matters.
Why your self-image can lag years behind your actual life and the only thing that actually updates it.
Why the feeling itself isn't the real problem—and the specific things people do to manage it that costs them.
Four things that actually help when you experience imposter syndrome.

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Subscribe to The Mental Strength Newsletter —⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://amymorinlcsw.com/newsletter⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

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