Make Your Damn Bed

Latest Episodes:

1043 || book club || I who have never known men Jan 13, 2024

Show notes

content warning: today's episode has brief mention of heavy trauma.

"I Who Have Never Known Men" is a science fiction novel written by Jacqueline Harpman, a Belgian author. The original French title is "Moi qui n'ai pas connu les hommes," and it was published in 1995. It explores themes of identity, survival, humanity, curiosity, hope, and yearning.

This book wrecked me, but in a very good way. That said, it's not for everyone at every juncture in life.

oldlampshades said this, which sadly, I didn't include in today's episode, but better late than never:

"What I love about this book is that it’s a story of a human with so much of her humanity stolen from her, yet she still finds herself asking the most fundamentally human questions: why am I here? What does it all mean? It’s a story about how even when born into a society so different from any that exists now, humans will always find love, hope, and wonder.

I think what makes it a masterpiece is that we don’t get any of the answers. There isn’t a neatly tied up ending. It makes the book an allegory for life, because we don’t get the answers to those questions, really."

RESOURCES: https://www.overdrive.com/media/4678018/i-who-have-never-known-men

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/I_Who_Have_Never_Known_Men

https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/11996 https://www.reddit.com/r/books/comments/10ts2rc/i_just_finished_i_who_have_never_known_men_by/

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The opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.

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1042 || existential ennui Jan 12, 2024

Show notes

you are a human being not a human doing. Contrary to the structures and powers and systems that have convinced us otherwise, you aren’t supposed to be doing and stressing all fucking day every day. In fact, you’re supposed to be prioritizing yourself before juggling all the other shit. Listen, I truly understand that this IS a privileged take that sounds like it cannot apply to everybody in this hellscape, i get that. Some of us are truly juggling demanding jobs/kids/pets/brains/ livelihoods and I never want to underestimate that - BUT as counter-intuitive as it sounds, the reminder still stands, YOU are allowed to just be. Even for 30 seconds at a time, shit involve those demanding customers, kids, pets, friends if you have to. But take 10 seconds when you can to just sit in silence. And steal away every moment you can to sit. Sit and do diddly fucking shit. And don’t ever feel guilty about it. If you need to justify it - ill remind you that according to neuroscientists, boredom has gotten a bum rap, and it can actually amp up your creativity, task engagement and job productivity.

there are thousands of definitions of boredom. it's all in how you interpret + respond.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4217586/

https://iep.utm.edu/boredom/

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1041 || a compiled compilation Jan 11, 2024

Show notes

Stop over-intellectualizing everything to avoid the feeling part and let yourself actually feel the damn thing. And listen, I’m no therapist, but I feel like resisting that feeling portion is just prolonging its lifespan in your body. You gotta move through it, but you can’t move through it unless you let it move through you, first. I read something once (that I’ll never question because it made sense) that said the physical effects of an emotion only peak for about 90 seconds and I feel like I can write anything out for 90 seconds.
So, all that cheesy meditative nonsense that you have heard about riding it out and feeling it in your body. Do that! Let yourself feel without judgement as best you can because sure, some emotions will suck, they will feel bad, you will feel bad in them. But they are there for a reason not a season, so let them in to leave their lil message and send them on their way. Otherwise, they’ll continue to haunt you, forever.
Instead of letting your insecurity stifle you let it guide you it’s a lighthouse not a destination the light there is to tell you where it is so that you can either go towards it or away from it, depending on where your navigation is pointed.

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1040 || pep talk for sad friends compilation Jan 10, 2024

Show notes

Even baddies get the saddies: Anybody who’s been feeling a little down or slow in their healing process but they’re still trying to show up? Well, this one is for everybody, but it’s mostly for you. Your experiences are what got you to where you are right now; they cannot be changed, the past cannot be altered. It is a part of your story now and objectively. It is an undeniably beautiful story. It’s rich with highs and lows, ups and downs, but you choose to show up and choose things that feel like healing day in and day out year after year even after occasional slip up, no matter how tough shit really gets for you??? Well, that’s extremely rare energy.

that said - you may have to confront some demons that you may have been running from for a while, but in order for them to stop showing up in your life as demons we do need to face them, head the fuck on. And you are absolutely capable of doing that with the appropriate support.

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1039 || ultimate self care guide w/Behind The Silk Jan 09, 2024

Show notes

The Ultimate Self Care Guide!? In real time!? You bet your ass I did.

Get the full guide here: (it's free) https://wondrous-speaker-2524.ck.page/fd5116f394

Listen to the behind the silk episode here: (I have a segment in it, not to brag) https://www.buzzsprout.com/2200431/14193833

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1038 || a bit of advice Jan 08, 2024

Show notes

send the damned text. reach out and ask. apologize with sincerity. the more authentic and intentional we become with our connections, the deeper and more fulfilling those connections become.

https://www.vox.com/even-better/23989636/best-expert-advice-2023

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1037 || stop intellectualizing + create something Jan 07, 2024

Show notes

we tend to over-intellectualize our feelings because we don't allow ourselves to work through them. Working through means DOING, CREATING, ACTING, PLAYING, and SEEKING JOY. Let down your walls + learn to feel through the act of creation.

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1036 || redefining profits Jan 06, 2024

Show notes

"a soft landing for capitalism" inspired this rant. Read it here: https://ryangosha.medium.com/soft-landing-for-capitalism-fab87821c4f0

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1035 || your resolutions, revolutionized Jan 05, 2024

Show notes

new years resolutions often imagine a person that behaves nothing like you. put you into the equation. let yourself explore the joy and fun in finding ways to bridge the gap towards the you, you are now + the you, you'd like to become.

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1034 || the artists way: recovering a sense of self Jan 04, 2024