Love and Life with Dr. Karin and Pastor Elliott

Latest Episodes:

Let’s Talk About Sex! How to Experience True Sexual Intimacy and Fulfillment Ep. 295 Apr 04, 2024

Show notes

In the final session of Elliott’s premarital curriculum, he helps couples develop habits and dynamics necessary for cultivating sexual intimacy and fulfillment.

Step one—you need to be able to talk about it! As Elliott notes, many couples struggle to discuss this most important element of their relationship.

Elliott shares the key questions he poses to couples to assist them in establishing a solid foundation for the physical expression of their love and commitment.

Sponsor: The Wellness Company

Website: ⁠https://www.twc.health/lovelife⁠

Code: LOVELIFE for 15% off your order!

Dr. Karin & Pastor Elliott Anderson

Website: http://loveandlifemedia.com/

Empowered Dating Playbook: smarturl.it/EmpoweredDatingBook

Instagram: @dr.karin | @pastorelliottanderson

COVID Trauma: How to Move Through Post COVID Stress Disorder Ep. 294 Mar 28, 2024

Show notes

Four years after “2 weeks to stop the spread” and I’m still reeling.

They say, “Get over it. Move on! COVID’s done.”

Of course, I’d like to forget about it. But, it doesn’t feel “done” to me. I’m still trying to get my bearings.

Elliott says it’s Post COVID Trauma. We all feel it to some degree. And, we all deal with it differently.

How could we NOT be traumatized? We’d never experienced anything like it!

The world shut down.
We lived in fear.
People died. We couldn’t say goodbye.
Kids stuck at home.
Masks and 6 feet of separation destroyed human connection.

Alpha, Delta, Omicron, what’s next?
From a bat? Lab leak? Who’s telling the truth!?!?
Don’t ask questions. Fauci’s the boss.
NOTHING to be done—just wait for the “vaccine.”
Skeptical of an experimental shot? What are you, a grandma killer?

I could go on and on . . .

If you’re feeling some Post COVID Stress Disorder, please join us for what amounts to a therapy session☺️ Elliott helps me move through the emotional fallout of being a COVID dissident. If you’re still disoriented from the last 4 years, this episode is for you!

Sponsor: The Wellness Company

Website: ⁠https://www.twc.health/lovelife⁠

Code: LOVELIFE for 15% off your order!

Dr. Karin & Pastor Elliott Anderson

Website: http://loveandlifemedia.com/

Empowered Dating Playbook: smarturl.it/EmpoweredDatingBook

Instagram: @dr.karin | @pastorelliottanderson

How to Navigate Money & Power Dynamics Ep. 293 Mar 21, 2024

Show notes

In the fifth session of Elliott’s premarital curriculum he discusses the relationship dynamics related to money and power.

Karin is out of town this week so Elliott and Tim tackle this topic and address the following issues:

How do we communicate with our partner about finances?

What role do you play with your partner in relationship to money?
How do money and power co-exist in the context of a partnership?
What does the Bible say about money?

We can live empowered lives in relationship with our finances!

Sponsor: The Wellness Company

Website: ⁠https://www.twc.health/lovelife⁠

Code: LOVELIFE for 15% off your order!

Dr. Karin & Pastor Elliott Anderson

Website: http://loveandlifemedia.com/

Empowered Dating Playbook: smarturl.it/EmpoweredDatingBook

Instagram: @dr.karin | @pastorelliottanderson

How Conflict Cultivates Intimacy Ep. 292 Mar 14, 2024

Show notes

We all know conflict is unavoidable. And, it’s certainly inherent to marriage.

In the fourth session of Elliott’s premarital curriculum, couples take a deep dive into all aspects of conflict. We know it’s inevitable, but can conflict actually strengthen our bond and cultivate intimacy?

Specifically we address:

Why does conflict happen?
When is it most likely to occur?
When disputes arise, what’s really going on beneath the surface?
Methods for disagreeing with fairness and maturity.
Working with your own conflict style and that of your partner.
How conflict CAN bring comfort!

Learn how our differences CAN strengthen your connection!

Sponsor: The Wellness Company

Website: ⁠https://www.twc.health/lovelife⁠

Code: LOVELIFE for 15% off your order!

Dr. Karin & Pastor Elliott Anderson

Website: http://loveandlifemedia.com/

Empowered Dating Playbook: smarturl.it/EmpoweredDatingBook

Instagram: @dr.karin | @pastorelliottanderson

Is Your Relationship Out of Order? Ep. 291 Mar 07, 2024

Show notes

As we all know, if something is “out of order,” it’s not working.

So, too, in marriage!

In session 3 of his premarital curriculum, Elliott discusses the importance of “order” in marriage. He shares key verses in Ephesians 5 with which some couples struggle. Elliott asserts a deeper understanding reveals how husbands and wives are empowered by these Biblical instructions.

He reminds us that although we’re not all wired for structure and order, we need to find a God ordained rhythm that works for us as a couple.

I share some examples from our marriage roles which, though traditional, feel authentic and empowering.

Join us to keep your relationship in order!

Sponsor: The Wellness Company

Website: ⁠https://www.twc.health/lovelife⁠

Code: LOVELIFE for 15% off your order!

Dr. Karin & Pastor Elliott Anderson

Website: http://loveandlifemedia.com/

Empowered Dating Playbook: smarturl.it/EmpoweredDatingBook

Instagram: @dr.karin | @pastorelliottanderson

Is Love Enough? Ep. 290 Feb 29, 2024

Show notes

We’re continuing our series on engagement by sharing Elliott’s premarital curriculum with you 💍

In session 2, Elliott asks couples if they believe love is enough. If we’re madly in love, can we be guaranteed a happy, solid, fulfilling marriage?

He goes into depth regarding the Bible’s instructions (I Peter 3:1-7) for how husbands are to treat their wives and vice versa. Elliott unpacks the meaning of the Greek to reveal the true intimacy God designed for us in marriage.

Spoiler alert: women will be quite pleased with God’s directions for how their husbands should love them!

We delve into the following:

What authentic intimacy looks like.
How love is given and received differently by men and women.
How husbands are to “honor” their wives (an incredibly radical notion at the time!) and the blessing they receive when they do so!

Join us for a deeper understanding of love and how this applies to relationships, intimacy, and marriage!

Sponsor The Wellness Company

Website: ⁠https://www.twc.health/lovelife⁠

Code: LOVELIFE for 15% off your order!

Dr. Karin & Pastor Elliott Anderson

Website: http://loveandlifemedia.com/

Empowered Dating Playbook: smarturl.it/EmpoweredDatingBook

Instagram: @dr.karin | @pastorelliottanderson

"That’s Awkward!" The Power of Words and Labels on Your Relationship to Self and Others Ep. 289 Feb 27, 2024

Show notes

Elliott sent me this Key and Peele clip the other day: https://www.youtube.com/shorts/wOBNm_8zw4I

I immediately texted back, “We need to record an episode about this!” The bit starts with Key sharing an unpopular opinion about a movie. Peele responds with a phrase we hear all the time these days, “That’s awkward!” Key is confused. What’s awkward about an opinion? He protests but Peele continues to shut him down with dismissive phrases like, “Okay . . . ” and “All right . . .” It’s a funny sketch that reveals a great deal about our current social environment. The terms and phrases we use are powerful—they reflect current norms while also framing how we experience our interactions and relationships. Meaning, when we perceive common day-to-day conversations as “awkward,” we respond accordingly i.e. we tell ourselves to be uncomfortable and hence increase the likelihood we’ll feel anxious. Think about it. We could just as easily label common day-to-day conversations as “normal—maybe surprising, maybe confusing, but normal” and thereby respond in kind. Elliott and I discuss the psychological implications of using common phrases—like, “That’s awkward” and, “I have anxiety about that!”—and how these impact our emotional wellbeing.

Specifically, we consider:

The societal norms which make the clip funny.
How labeling a situation informs our emotional response.
The harm of labeling ourselves in a fixed, immutable manner e.g., “I have anxiety.”
The influence of constant phone usage on our friendships, psychological health, and humanity in general.
How to decrease disempowered self-talk and replace it with empowered self-talk.

Join us as we examine what’s really going on behind phrases like, “That’s awkward!” and “I have anxiety!”

Sponsor The Wellness Company

Website: ⁠https://www.twc.health/lovelife⁠

Code: LOVELIFE for 15% off your order!

Dr. Karin & Pastor Elliott Anderson

Website: http://loveandlifemedia.com/

Empowered Dating Playbook: smarturl.it/EmpoweredDatingBook

Instagram: @dr.karin | @pastorelliottanderson

What if Your Relationship Isn’t Easy at All? Then What? Ep. 288 Feb 22, 2024

Show notes

Last week, Producer Tim and I discussed the joys of an easy marriage.

But we know, of course, this isn’t everyone’s experience!

We definitely wanted Elliott to share how he helps couples in difficult marriages improve their connection so they can enjoy each other more—and maybe even find that ease and fluidity they’ve been lacking!

Specifically, we discuss:

Semantics around the word, “easy.” Why Elliott thinks it’s often more about a secure connection, as opposed to an “easy” one.
The fact that couples with avoidant attachment styles might have what seems to be an easier marriage, but how this could reflect a lack of depth in their connection.
When an easy marriage might actually be in trouble!
Strategies for couples struggling with a difficult marriage—your marriage CAN get easier!

No matter the dynamics of your relationship, please join us!

Sponsor The Wellness Company

Website: ⁠https://www.twc.health/lovelife⁠

Code: LOVELIFE for 15% off your order!

Dr. Karin & Pastor Elliott Anderson

Website: http://loveandlifemedia.com/

Empowered Dating Playbook: smarturl.it/EmpoweredDatingBook

Instagram: @dr.karin | @pastorelliottanderson

Can Relationships Actually Be Easy? Ep. 287 Feb 14, 2024

Show notes

The Love & Life family is a diverse bunch—from singles, to those exclusively dating, to engaged couples, to marrieds, to divorced folks back on the scene again.

We’re all at different places in our love journey.

As we thought about what we wanted to share for Valentine’s Day, Producer Tim suggested we grapple with the following:

Are relationships doomed to be a constant struggle?
Do they have to be SO hard?
Could marriage actually be easy?

Since it was Tim’s idea, I asked him to share his thoughts and experience with the topic.

Specifically, we delve into the following:

What makes a relationship easy?
Do opposites attract and if so, won’t this eventually lead to strife?
If we marry someone similar to us, won’t things get boring?
How do conflict styles factor in?
What role does attachment style play in terms of relationship ease?

We then take a look at the psych research, of course!

We also weave in clips from a song I wrote for Dan called Breathing—“It’s like breathing, so easy, loving you couldn’t come more naturally, it’s like breathing.”

You can listen to Breathing on Spotify here: https://open.spotify.com/track/5M6UjeGH1dyNPs05CPRpeN?si=19f3d9b189bc4341

Happy Valentine’s Day from Love & Life!

Sponsor The Wellness Company

Website: ⁠https://www.twc.health/lovelife⁠

Code: LOVELIFE for 15% off your order!

Dr. Karin & Pastor Elliott Anderson

Website: http://loveandlifemedia.com/

Empowered Dating Playbook: smarturl.it/EmpoweredDatingBook

Instagram: @dr.karin | @pastorelliottanderson

Sources:

https://www.gottman.com/blog/truth-expectations-relationships/

Trauma: How it Impacts Our Relationship to Self and Others Ep. 286 Feb 09, 2024

Show notes

We interrupt our series on engagement to bring you Elliott’s presentation on trauma, which he shared recently at his church.

How do we define trauma?
What experiences leave a trauma wound?
How do these wounds impact our relationships?
What does the Bible have to say about trauma?
Is there hope for healing?
If so, how do we heal?

We’ve all experienced some level of trauma—Big T or Little t. Perhaps you never fought in a war zone or were the victim of a violent attack, but we all recently endured a global pandemic and, as Elliott explains, COVID response measures certainly traumatized us individually and collectively.

Join us for a word of hope and strategies for healing!

P.S. Elliott wanted us to include the hymn I sang at the end of the service. 🙏

Sponsor The Wellness Company

Website: ⁠https://www.twc.health/lovelife⁠

Code: LOVELIFE for 15% off your order!

Dr. Karin & Pastor Elliott Anderson

Website: http://loveandlifemedia.com/

Empowered Dating Playbook: smarturl.it/EmpoweredDatingBook

Instagram: @dr.karin | @pastorelliottanderson