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    Religion & Spirituality

    Listen, Learn & Love Hosted by Richard Ostler

    Welcome to our podcast!

    My name is Richard H. Ostler and I am a native of Salt Lake City, small business owner, married father of six with several grandchildren. I believe in and am deeply committed to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and want it to work for a wider group.
    I am the author of three books:

    “Listen Learn and Love: Embracing LGBTQ Latter-day Saints” published in 2020 available at Amazon (amazon.com/dp/1462135773)

    “Listen Learn and Love: Improving Latter-day Saint Culture” published in 2022. The book explores who we can do better to help all Latter-day Saints feel more welcome, needed and a feeling of belonging in our congregations. Available at Amazon (amazon.com/dp/1462139566)

    “Listen Learn and Love: Building the Good Ship Zion” released in Sept 2023. The book explores additional topics to help all Latter-day Saint feel welcome and needed on the Good Ship Zion. Available at Amazon (amazon.com/dp/1462145280)

    The purpose of all three books is to help us better create Zion by helping more feel welcome, a sense of belonging, and needed in our congregations.

    Proceed from the books go the Stockton Power Memorial Scholarship (www.standingforstockton.com) in honor of Stockton Powers a gay Latter-day Saint teenager who died of suicide in 2016. Everything I do is a self-funded labor of love ❤️

    I am the author of two Ensign articles:

    ‘How the Savior’s Healing Power Applies to Repenting from Sexual Sin’ (August 2020/YSA Digital Only) www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/ensign/2020/08/young-adults/how-the-saviors-healing-power-applies-to-repenting-from-sexual-sin

    ‘7 Tips for Overcoming Pornography Use’ (October, page 72) www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/ensign/2020/10/young-adults/7-tips-for-overcoming-pornography-use.

    This podcast is designed to discuss some more complicated issues in our church to help all of us better “listen, learn and love” so we can minister in a more effective way to all of our Heavenly Parents’ children.

    Podcasts are indexed by category at listenlearnandlove.org/podcasts

    Thank you for joining us. You can’t donate to this podcast. There are no sponsors. But you can leave a review/rate the podcast on the platform you are listening and/or leave a review at Deseret Book/Amazon on my books.

    With love, Richard ‘Papa’ Ostler ❤

    Twitter: twitter.com/Papa_Ostler
    IG: www.instagram.com/papa_ostler
    Facebook: facebook.com/richard.ostler.5
    Substack: https://substack.com/@papaostler
    E-mail: richard@ostlergroup.com

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    Copyright: © All rights reserved

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    Latest Episodes:
    Episode 460: Jason Conforto, Producer of Dog Valley, Murder of Gordon Church, Gay Utahn in 1988 Oct 02, 2021
    Show notes

    My friend Jason Conforto, producer at Avalanche Studios, talks about why he and director, Dave Lindsay, decided to produce the documentary film Dog Valley, about the brutal murder of Gordon Church in Millard County, Utah in 1988. Jason shares the role his friend, Chad Anderson, played in researching and bringing this story to Avalanche Studios and producing the film with them. The movie honors the life of Gordon Church and brings awareness to his horrific death. It opens the door to what we can do to better support our fellow LGBTQ friends and create positive messages. Jason, who is an active LDS father with a gay son, also talks about how much better things are for his son 30+ years later and how much he loves and supports his son. You can purchase the film at: https://itunes.apple.com/us/movie/dog-valley/id1582528103 Or you can find more information about the film at dogvalleymovie.com or Avalanche-studios.com Thank you Jason for being on the podcast. Thank you to Chad Anderson, Dave Lindsay, the Millard County Sheriff Department, Avalanche Studios, and everyone who put this needed documentary together to honor Gordon Church. Facebook links: https://www.facebook.com/Dog-Valley-101075248315548 https://www.facebook.com/AvalancheStudios https://www.facebook.com/jason.conforto.1/

    Episode 459: Brenna Hoffman, Wife and Mother, Faith Crisis, Decided to Leave the Church, Returned Sep 30, 2021
    Show notes

    My friend Brenna Hoffman (married mother of new baby boy) shares her story of not belonging and never fully feeling accepted in Latter-day Saint culture. This feeling along with a negative experience in the temple and life-long questions led Brenna to conclude that her path was to leave the Church. Brenna shares her story, and talks about support from her convert husband (in a master’s program at BYU), family and friends, feeling accepted in non-LDS congregations and her spiritual impressions to return to the Church. Brenna has been sharing her experiences on social media, in testimony meeting in her BYU Ward, and in her community and has been met with love and support. She also talks about creating safe spaces and unity in our congregations so everyone can feel like they have a place in the Church. If you are trying to find a way to stay in the Church or are looking for better tools to help others, please listen to Brenna’s story. It is powerful, vulnerable and full of insights to help us better come together. You can find Brenna on Instagram at @brennabelieves where she shares insights and spiritual thoughts on faith crises, how to support those in a faith crisis, and thoughts about church culture. Thank you for being on the podcast Brenna. You are awesome!

    Episode 458: Becky Edwards, Candidate for U.S. Senate. Sep 27, 2021
    Show notes

    My friend Becky Edwards joins us to talk about her run for U.S. Senate. Becky, who served 10 years in the Utah House of Representatives, talks about why she is running, past legislative successes, the importance of listening, and principles to bring us together. Becky also talks about the story of her yellow couch—now a key element of her campaign. I start the podcast with our family connection to Becky and John Edwards. During their recent missionary service in Samoa, Becky became the answer to our family prayers for our missionary son Ben who served in Samoa in 2019-2020. Thank you Becky for being on the podcast and sharing your vision for Utah. Thanks for sharing why you are running and the values you believe will help bring us together and reduce divisiveness. Please check out Becky’s campaign at www.BeckyForUtah.com or follow her on social media @BeckyForUtah

    Episode 457: Dylan Stegall, Gay BYU-Idaho Student, Plans to Become a Doctor Sep 26, 2021
    Show notes

    My friend Dylan Stegall (Age 23, Texan, RM for Chile Santiago East) shares his journey as gay Latter-day Saint. Dylan talks about being aware of this part about him before his mission but staying really busy/productive and kind of pushing it down. Dylan talks about his successful and enjoyable mission. Dylan talks about trying to date woman at BYU-Idaho and how he gradually came to feel that is not his path. Dylan shares starting to come out to others and then a deeply spiritual experience where Dylan has God how he felt about Dylan’s sexual orientation. That powerful experience let Dylan to come out in this Facebook post in August of 2021 https://www.facebook.com/dylan.stegall.3/posts/1199150057217305. Dylan talks about what is it like to be out at BYU-Idaho (mostly good experiences) and what BYU-Idaho is doing to including calling a chief inclusion officer (see https://byuicomm.org/byuiscroll/6-months-as-chief-inclusion-officer/). BYU-Idaho had a booth at the Rexburg Pride this past Summer (https://www.eastidahonews.com/2021/06/rexburg-pride-celebrate-unity-event-considered-huge-success-within-the-community/). Dylan has co-founded a non profit called Teton Light to help fund scholarships for LGBTQ BYU-Idaho students (check out tetonlight.org). Thank you for being on the podcast Dylan. You story bring hope and perspective for others. Respect for sharing your story and all the good work you have done to be in a good place. You are a good friend and I’m honored to have you on the podcast! ** Please Check Out My Book At: ** Deseret Book: www.deseretbook.com/p/listen-learn-and-love-embracing-lgbtq-latter-day-saints Amazon: www.amazon.com/dp/1462135773

    Episode 456: Garrett and Sallie Ferguson Sep 24, 2021
    Show notes

    My friends Garrett and Sallie Ferguson, married parents of 4 kids, join us from the Dallas area to share their story. They first shared in 2013 as part of the Voices of Hope project https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s36K2ilFsnY. They give us an update on their lives since 2013 and what they are doing to bring more understanding to LGBTQ/SSA Latter-day Saints through their co-work as managers of the Voices of Hope project. That project has recently expanded into a podcast as part of North Star (see northstarlds.org). Thank you for being on the podcast Garrett and Sallie and all the great work you are doing to bring us together and increase understanding. ** Please Check Out My Book At: ** Deseret Book: www.deseretbook.com/p/listen-learn-and-love-embracing-lgbtq-latter-day-saints Amazon: www.amazon.com/dp/1462135773

    Episode 455: Jakob Schramm, Gay Latter-Day Saint Sep 22, 2021
    Show notes

    My friend Jakob Schramm (Age 23, RM from the Mexico Monterrey West Mission, Mechanical Engineering at University of Utah and Utah Valley University) shares his journey as a gay Latter-day Saint. Jakob talks the journey to understand and accept this part of himself and then the thoughtful and methodical process to figure out his best path forward. Jakob talks about working through two suicidal times of his life and how he is now in a much better place thanks to the support he is receiving from others. Jakob is honest about his relationship with the LDS Church and is not yet sure how to reconcile his membership in the Church and his sexuality, though he still maintains a relationship with God. Thank you for being on the podcast Jakob. You are a good man doing your best to find your best path forward. Thanks for being you and all the good you bring into this world. ** Please Check Out My Book At: ** Deseret Book: www.deseretbook.com/p/listen-learn-and-love-embracing-lgbtq-latter-day-saints Amazon: www.amazon.com/dp/1462135773

    Episode 454: Jamison Manwaring, Gay Latter-day Saint Sep 19, 2021
    Show notes

    My friend Jamison Manwaring (RM from Eastern Canada, Business Owner, Age 40) shares his journey as a gay Latter-day Saint. Jamison talks about his efforts to make deals with God to not be gay during his closeted years growing up in Idaho Falls and coming out to his Mission President who listened without judgement. Jamison talks about difficult and painful years in his 20’s and early 30’s trying to find a way to find a way forward in a healthy and sustainable way as he navigated his sexuality and faith. Jamison talks about working for Goldman Sachs in New York and how the supportive culture for its LGBTQ employees to helped Jamison better accept himself and come out in a more extended way in 2013 on Facebook (www.youtube.com/watch?v=W_Thj42lMf4). Jamison is now a business owner in the Phoenix area (https://www.bizjournals.com/phoenix/news/2020/07/17/valley-exec-went-from-wall-street-to-main-street.html) Jamison talks about dating men and why he feels that is the best path forward for him. Jamison talks about his relationship with the Church and how he supports those who are members of and find joy in the Church. In short, Jamison is extending grace (and inviting us to do the same) by being supportive of everyone’s individual life paths and seeing/honoring the joy that people are finding in their individual paths. Jamison’s dear mother Sue (8 children, 27 grandchildren and 8 great grandchildren) joins us on the podcast to share advice for Latter-day Saint parents with LGBTQ children. Thank you Jamison for being on the podcast. You bring hope and healing and teach principles in a practical way to bring us together as the same human family. ** Please Check Out My Book At: ** Deseret Book: www.deseretbook.com/p/listen-learn-and-love-embracing-lgbtq-latter-day-saints Amazon: www.amazon.com/dp/1462135773

    Episode 453: Ed Axley, Convert, Recently Released Bishop, Gospel Insights Sep 18, 2021
    Show notes

    My friend Ed Axley (married father of four, business owner, RM from Costa Rica) share the unique aspects of our restored doctrine that led to his baptism into the Church at age 18. Ed also shares four insightful ways to respond when people open with their life situations. Ed concludes with helping each of us see ourselves as beloved children of Heavenly Parents and to never feel shame or less of ourselves—even in our worst moments. Thank you Ed for being on the podcast. You bring hope, wonderful perspective and a love for all of Heavenly Parents children.

    Episode 452: Andrea Lystrup, LMFT, Active LDS, Love, Trauma, Unity Sep 16, 2021
    Show notes

    My friend Andrea Lystrup is a licensed marriage and family therapist joining us to share insights on several important topics including 1) creating Zion within our Church; 2) tools to better love each other; 3) how to balance the tension between law and love; 4) working through pain when something said at Church is hurtful; 5) how to get through trauma/pain which is interfering with your relationship with God and ability to access your spirituality; and 6) advice for LDS couples in mixed-faith marriage. Thank you Andrea for being on the podcast. I was deeply moved by your insights and expertise to help bring us together and help/heal ourselves and others. You are doing great and needed work. Your can connect with Andrea at https://www.andrealystrup.com/ and Instagram @askandreamft

    Episode 451: Marcus Hayden, Gay Latter-day Saint, Leaving on a Mission Sep 14, 2021
    Show notes

    My friend Marcus Hayden, age 19 and preparing for a mission, shares his story as a gay Latter-day Saint. Marcus starts with the excellent talk he gave in his BYU YSA Ward this summer based on Elder Gong’s talk “Room in the Inn” (https://abn.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/general-conference/2021/04/16gong?lang=eng). Marcus does a great job of taking the principles from Elder Gong’s talk and applying them in real-life situations in our congregations. Marcus then shares his story coming out at age 13 to his parents, at age 14 to his Bishop and out to a broader circle after he graduated from High School. Marcus talks about the excellent support he is receiving from his parents, community, friends and local leaders. Marcus then talks about his decision to serve a mission and why being gay is a good thing as a missionary representing the Savior to help others come unto Christ through our restored Church. Thank you Marcus for being on the podcast. You have a beautiful and unique life mission to help others. You are going to be a great missionary. ** Please Check Out My Book At: ** Deseret Book: www.deseretbook.com/p/listen-learn-and-love-embracing-lgbtq-latter-day-saints Amazon: www.amazon.com/dp/1462135773

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