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    Religion & Spirituality

    Listen, Learn & Love Hosted by Richard Ostler

    Welcome to our podcast!

    My name is Richard H. Ostler and I am a native of Salt Lake City, small business owner, married father of six with several grandchildren. I believe in and am deeply committed to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and want it to work for a wider group.
    I am the author of three books:

    “Listen Learn and Love: Embracing LGBTQ Latter-day Saints” published in 2020 available at Amazon (amazon.com/dp/1462135773)

    “Listen Learn and Love: Improving Latter-day Saint Culture” published in 2022. The book explores who we can do better to help all Latter-day Saints feel more welcome, needed and a feeling of belonging in our congregations. Available at Amazon (amazon.com/dp/1462139566)

    “Listen Learn and Love: Building the Good Ship Zion” released in Sept 2023. The book explores additional topics to help all Latter-day Saint feel welcome and needed on the Good Ship Zion. Available at Amazon (amazon.com/dp/1462145280)

    The purpose of all three books is to help us better create Zion by helping more feel welcome, a sense of belonging, and needed in our congregations.

    Proceed from the books go the Stockton Power Memorial Scholarship (www.standingforstockton.com) in honor of Stockton Powers a gay Latter-day Saint teenager who died of suicide in 2016. Everything I do is a self-funded labor of love ❤️

    I am the author of two Ensign articles:

    ‘How the Savior’s Healing Power Applies to Repenting from Sexual Sin’ (August 2020/YSA Digital Only) www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/ensign/2020/08/young-adults/how-the-saviors-healing-power-applies-to-repenting-from-sexual-sin

    ‘7 Tips for Overcoming Pornography Use’ (October, page 72) www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/ensign/2020/10/young-adults/7-tips-for-overcoming-pornography-use.

    This podcast is designed to discuss some more complicated issues in our church to help all of us better “listen, learn and love” so we can minister in a more effective way to all of our Heavenly Parents’ children.

    Podcasts are indexed by category at listenlearnandlove.org/podcasts

    Thank you for joining us. You can’t donate to this podcast. There are no sponsors. But you can leave a review/rate the podcast on the platform you are listening and/or leave a review at Deseret Book/Amazon on my books.

    With love, Richard ‘Papa’ Ostler ❤

    Twitter: twitter.com/Papa_Ostler
    IG: www.instagram.com/papa_ostler
    Facebook: facebook.com/richard.ostler.5
    Substack: https://substack.com/@papaostler
    E-mail: richard@ostlergroup.com

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    Copyright: © All rights reserved

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    Latest Episodes:
    Episode 531: Taryn Hiatt, Suicide Prevention May 31, 2022
    Show notes

    My friend Taryn Hiatt, Area Director Utah/Nevada American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, joins us to talk about suicide prevention. Taryn (who has been working in this space for over 20 years after her father Terry who died by suicide in 2002) talks about the various organizations available to those considering suicide, those working to prevent suicide, and support for suicide loss survivors. Taryn has great insights into the scope of these organizations and how they all work together for the common goal of suicide prevention. Taryn also shares her own journey as a survivor of being sexually assaulted and suicide attempts. For Taryn this isn’t theoretical—rather since she is walking this road—Taryn has real-life and practical insights to give hope and healing. Taryn talks about the “dark night of the soul” and finding hope that dawn will come. Her story is deeply moving and will help you. She also talks about how to better support our LGBTQ friends. If you are considering suicide or working to help others, please listen to this podcast. Taryn’s insights will help you. Thank you, Taryn, for being on the podcast and all your great work in our community to saves lives and bring more understanding. You are a hero to me and many others! Here are resources mentioned in the podcast: Suicide Prevention Hot Line: 1-800-273-8255 Trans Suicide Hot Line: (877) 565-8860 or translifeline.org/hotline/ Trevor Project: 866-488-7386 Or www.thetrevorproject.org/ David Archuleta Love Loud: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ooh6otPKmzE June 24th LGBTQ Suicide Prevention Event at University of Utah: https://utlgbtq.attendease.com/ Link to support a loved one after an attempt: https://afsp.org/when-a-loved-one-has-made-an-attempt/ and this recording youtu.be/ouHshCnh_Yw and www.namiut.org/resources/mentoring Link to support you after your attempt and coming home: https://healthcare.utah.edu/hmhi/programs/crisis-diversion/

    Episode 530: Dr. Christian Judd - Coping with Loss from Suicide May 28, 2022
    Show notes

    My friend Christian Judd shares the story of his brother Bryan who died by suicide in April of 2010. I became aware of Christian and his good work and message around this topic with these tweets: https://twitter.com/christianmjudd/status/1513174782723846145 https://twitter.com/christianmjudd/status/1513583004785917957 Dr. Judd, who is a board certified psychiatric and mental health nurse practitioner, shares insights on how to help individuals navigate when someone close has died by suicide. He also provides insight for those who have considered suicide. Here are three suicide prevention numbers. Please reach out for help if you are having suicidal thoughts: Huntsman Mental Health Institute Crisis line (Utah residents): 1-801-587-3000 National Suicide Prevention Hotline: 1-800-273-8255 The Trevor Project: 1-212-695-8650 Here is a link to the David Archuleta Love Loud video mentioned in the podcast: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ooh6otPKmzE If you are having thoughts of suicide or have lost someone to suicide, Christian’s insights may help you. Thank you Christian for being on the podcast and all your good work. You are a good man and friend. Also, check out Christian’s podcast called Social Hall Sports Podcast (mostly about sports) at https://linktr.ee/socialhallpod And check out a chapter from my new book on mental health (chapter 6) at: amazon.com/dp/1462139566

    Episode 529: Craig Jones, Traumatic Brain Injury May 25, 2022
    Show notes

    My friend Craig Jones (active LDS, married to his wife Jodi for 36 years, age 58, parents of three) joins us via Zoom from Edmonton, Canada to talk about his life-changing traumatic brain injury that occurred about ten years ago. Craig talks about being in a coma, rehab and then working to heal and move forward. Craig is full of hope and a positive attitude—even with his life permanently changed. If your mortal life has been forever changed because of medical issue in your life or a loved one, this podcast will help you. Thank you, Craig for being on the podcast. You are your wife Jodi are awesome.

    Episode 528: Chandler Rogers, Shares His Journey Overcoming Pornography and New App Called Relay May 22, 2022
    Show notes

    My friend Chandler Rogers (New York City RM, Married, Age 24, BYU Grad) bravely shares his journey with overcoming pornography. Chandler talks about how it came into his life about 10 years ago, opening us to his Bishop and his Mother, leaving on his mission but still having slip-ups and opening up to his mission president, finishing his successful mission, coming home and opening up to his future wife Jade, how they navigated that reality and getting married. Chandler talks about the new app, Relay, he developed to help others working to solve unwanted porn use. The app makes it easy to form a strong support system and find healthy accountability and deeper connection for healing. You learn more about it at www.joinrelay.app. If you are working to end porn use or want to help others, please listen to this podcast. It will give you new insights and tools. And if you are trying to figure out how/when to open up to your significant other about your porn use, please listen to this podcast. Chandler's insights will help you. Thank you, Chandler, for being on the podcast and your courage to be honest, real, vulnerable—and help us understand how the Savior feels about us and will help us. Respect. Your story gives hope to others. And please check out the Relay App at www.joinrelay.app **Check out my new book that has a chapter (chapter 4) about solving pornography: amazon.com/dp/1462139566 **

    Episode 527: Jonathan Decker, Active LDS, Navigating Complicated Church Issues May 19, 2022
    Show notes

    My friend Jonathan Decker (active LDS, married father of 5, licensed marriage and family therapist) joins us to share his testimony which includes how he handles complicated aspects of church history and challenging current issues. It is beautiful testimony that includes the realities of difficult issues in our Church. I became aware of Jonathan when I read this testimony that was shared broadly on social media and asked him to be on the podcast. Here is a link to that testimony: https://www.facebook.com/JonoDecker/posts/10159801545877937 If you are in a faith crisis, trying to reconcile complicated issues, or helping others; please read Jonathan’s testimony and listen to this podcast. It will help you. For some, it might be the sustainable framework to remain in the Church—and I’ve learned that many in a faith crisis do want to find an authentic way to stay in the Church. You can read Jonathan's "Ask a Latter-day Saint Therapist" articles for LDS Living here: https://www.ldsliving.com/jonathan-decker You can also check out Jonathan's YouTube channels mentioned in the podcast: Cinema Therapy - https://www.youtube.com/c/cinematherapysolutions Mended Light - https://www.youtube.com/c/MendedLight Personal channel with Jonathan's performances for BYU's Divine Comedy - https://www.youtube.com/c/JonathanDecker Thank you, Jonathan, for being on the podcast. I was deeply moved listening to you and your insights into better living the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I encourage everyone to listen to this podcast and read/share it along with your Facebook post. ** Please Check Out My Two Books At ** Amazon (LGBTQ): amazon.com/dp/1462135773 Amazon (Culture): amazon.com/dp/1462139566 ** Want to develop church-supported LGBTQ activities in your local area? Please join our FB group below ** https://www.facebook.com/groups/1433556613672143

    Episode 526: Angela Hughey and Michael Soto (LDS Supported LGBTQ Legislation) May 16, 2022
    Show notes

    My friends Angela Hughey (Co-founder and President, One Community of Arizona, gay) and Michael Soto (Chief Executive Officer of Equality Arizona, transgender man) join us to talk about the LDS supported LGBTQ legislation in Mesa, Arizona that was passed in 2021. Elder Neil L. Anderson, in his April 2022 Conference Talk titled Following Jesus: Being a Peacemaker, mentioned this effort (www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/general-conference/2022/04/15andersen). Thank you to the many Mesa area Church members who worked to get this legislation passed including Mayor John Giles and Councilwomen Julie Spilsbury. Angela and Michael talk about scaling this effort to a become a nationwide law in the “Equality and Fairness For All Americans” effort. They invite you to join this effort by June 24th at www.equalityandfairness.com/. Angela and Michael also talk about being invited and joining senior LDS Church leaders for the open houses for both the Mesa Arizona and Washington DC Temple open houses. They talk about the tender and positive interactions with senior leaders of the Church. This experience was covered by Tad Walch for the Deseret News (www.deseret.com/faith/2022/4/27/23034223/latter-day-saint-leaders-lgbt-advocates-common-ground-washington-dc-temple-faith-religious-liberty). Accompanying Angela and Michael to DC were James and Monica Phillips (LDS Parents of 2 LGBTQ children), Lynette and Cory Braddock (LDS parents of transgender daughter) and Abram and Ashley Ellsworth (LDS allies) This is a remarkable story that I hope all Latter-day Saints listen to and then act on impressions on how to work in each of our circles of influence to build bridges on all types of issues that could divide us. This isn’t theory—this is how to take the doctrine of Christ to love and apply to bring us together as the same human family. I also encourage everyone to go to www.equalityandfairness.com on consider joining this effort. Thank you, Angela and Michael, for your great work. Honored to have you on the podcast. ** Please Check Out My LGBTQ Book At: ** Deseret Book: www.deseretbook.com/p/listen-learn-and-love-embracing-lgbtq-latter-day-saints Amazon: www.amazon.com/dp/1462135773 ** Want to develop church-supported LGBTQ activities in your local area? Please join our FB group below ** https://www.facebook.com/groups/1433556613672143

    Episode 525: Benjamin Lee, Author May 13, 2022
    Show notes

    My friend Ben Lee (Harvard Law Grad, Age 27) shares the story of feeling deep spiritual impressions to write a book during the rigors of law school to address his own journey to look inward to see pride and work to reduce pride to lift the burdens of others and find more long-term peace. Ben talks about the importance of Christ’s own example of humility and showing grace and love to everyone. This remarkable book is called Pride and Paradox: Exploring Christlike Humility and the Struggle to Defeat Pride and can be found at Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B09WQVK19X This is a serious book. I am deeply impressed with Ben’s insights and honest reflections to help us create Zion. I encourage everyone to read and share Ben’s book. Thank you, Ben for being on the podcast and your needed voice to help bring us together as the same human family.

    Episode 524: Devorah Stucki, Queer BYU Student May 10, 2022
    Show notes

    My friend Devorah Stucki (graduates May 2022 in Bioinformatics at the age of 19) joins us to share her story. Devorah focus on two main parts of her story. The first part is becoming aware she is lesbian by the end of High School and the second part is her experience at BYU. Devorah talks honestly about the challenges of being queer at a BYU student. As we hear difficult experiences, it is a chance for us how we can improve things for queer Latter-day Saints in our circle of influence. Devorah also talks about her decision to come out publicly and her advice to queer student consider or at BYU. Thank you, Devorah for being on the podcast and your courage to share your story. You’ve accomplished much in your short life and have a great life ahead of you. Richard 'Papa' Ostler ❤️ https://listenlearnandlove.org/gay-lesbian-same-sex-podcasts Podcast Link: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/episode-524-devorah-stucki-queer-byu-student/id1347971725?i=1000560196752 ** Please Check Out My LGBTQ Book At: ** Deseret Book: www.deseretbook.com/p/listen-learn-and-love-embracing-lgbtq-latter-day-saints Amazon: www.amazon.com/dp/1462135773 ** Want to develop church-supported LGBTQ activities in your local area? Please join our FB group below ** https://www.facebook.com/groups/1433556613672143

    Episode 523: Dr. Cameron Staley, Solving Pornography through Acceptance and Commitment Therapy May 07, 2022
    Show notes

    My friend, Dr. Cameron Staley who is a clinical psychologist and was on Episode 345, joins us to share new insights and tools to understand and solve pornography use. Dr. Staley (active Latter-day Saint) discusses the four main reasons some struggle with pornography use and how ACT helps reduce/solve pornography viewing. If you are working to end pornography use or to help others, please listen to this podcast. I promise this podcast and ACT will help you. Thank you, Dr. Staley, for developing more tools and instilling hope and insights to help good people solve pornography use. Your work is so needed. The resources mentioned in the podcast are: Dr. Staley provides online counseling services to residents of Utah and Idaho. You can schedule counseling, check out the Life After Series Podcast, interviews, research, and free trainings on his website: https://cameronstaleyphd.wordpress.com/ or follow him @thelifeafterseries Life After Pornography online program: https://www.lifeafterpornography.com/sales-page33509805 Life After Pornography Coach app: https://getyourmarriageon.com/life-after-pornography-coach/ Richard Ostler Book: amazon.com/dp/1462139566

    Episode 522: Sisters Andrea Neahusan and Amber Ayres, Survivors of Abuse May 03, 2022
    Show notes

    My friends, Andrea Neahusan (married mother of 6) and Amber Ayres (married mother of 5) bravely share their story of sexual, verbal, and emotional abuse by their father throughout their childhood. Their father’s severe manipulation kept the sisters from talking about the abuse the whole time. It wasn’t until Andrea was 19 that she finally revealed their secret to her Bishop and police got involved. They talk about the residual effects of their depression, anger, and PTSD from the abuse. After 25 years of living in a safe environment, Andrea and Amber now feel compelled to share the patterns of healing which included therapy, boundaries, and prayerful experiences that allowed the Atonement of Jesus Christ to heal their immense pain. Their hope is that their experiences will help others with traumatic pasts to know that healing and peace are possible. If you are a survivor of any abuse or trauma and seek hope for your future, please listen to Andrea and Amber. If you feel the pain from the realities of a broken and mortal world, please listen. If you are supporting a friend or family member working through the effects of abuse or trauma, please listen. Their insights into the healing power of Christ’s Atonement are eye opening! **Trigger Warning** If any listeners need to avoid the triggers of semi-explicit details of abuse, please skip the first half, and instead join us for the last half to hear about their miraculous, but difficult road to healing and forgiveness. This isn’t just theoretical for Andrea and Amber—but a very real, lived experience. Thank you, Andrea and Amber, for your courage to share your story. Respect from all of us. This is one of our finest podcasts. To connect with Andrea and Amber on social media: Website: http://www.tendermerciesmightymiracles.com Instagram: @tendermerciesmightymiracles Facebook: Tender Mercies Mighty Miracles Email: tendermerciesmightymiracles@gmail.com

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