Joyful Courage for Parenting Teens

Latest Episodes:

BONUS EPS: Maria Dismondy, Award Winning Author Jun 23, 2016

Show notes

So happy to welcome Maria Dismondy to the show for my June BONUS episode!! Maria is an award winning author and has written many books for children that engage and inspire them to consider the skills needed to be a good friend and problem solver. She spent time in the classroom before having her own children, and uses her time in schools to inform what she writes about in her books.

::::::::::

Maria's books:

The Littlest Linebacker - A Story of Determination Chocolate Milk Por Favor - Celebrating Diversity with Empathy Spoonful of Sweetness - and Other Delicious Manners Pink Tiara Cookies for Three Spaghetti in a Hot Dog Bun - Having the Courage to be Who You Are The Juice Box Bully - Empowering Kids to Stand Up for Others The Potato Chip Champ - Discovering Why Kindness Counts

::::::::::

Find Maria on You TubeFollow her on InstagramCheck out her website Conversation starters from Pinterest

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Eps 48: Taming the Toddlers and Haters with Julietta Skoog Jun 21, 2016

Show notes

Welcome! My guest today is a dear friend, Julietta Skoog, who is a positive discipline trainer. She joined us as a guest on Episode 4 about Family Meetings. It’s hard to believe that we’re here at Episode 48 now! I’m so thrilled to have Julietta back again so that we can all benefit from her wealth of parenting knowledge. She teaches many classes and workshops for parents, in addition to being a school counselor and psychologist in Seattle, where she works with hundreds of students. Her most important parenting work, however, is at home with her children, ages 4 and 7. Today’s topic is all about Toddlers—raising them and dealing with those around us who might not agree with our parenting methods. Join us!

What you’ll hear in this episode:

Toddlers are biologically driven to explore the world through visual learning and touch.
We need to find a way to bridge between our world and their world.
They need to know that you hear them and understand them.
Connect with them, see them, and hear them.
With 2-3 year olds, redirection and distraction can be effective tools to move them on to what they need to do next.
What it means to “get them to the second location”
With older toddlers, use curiosity questions and give them a wait time.
With younger toddlers, limit their choices to ones that you’re ok with.
Mutual respect is essential—even with toddlers!
Help them get excited about the next step with PLAY.
Use deep firmness and structure.
How should we handle destructive behaviors?
Speak consistently
Model connection and firmness
Supervise!
Model and help them learn empathy
Transitions cause anxiety for kids, so do your prevention work!

In dealing with others’ opinions, remember that we’re all challenged as parents; we’re all doing the best we can with the tools we have.

Resources:

www.besproutable.com (Julietta has video examples and other parenting resources.)

Julietta's website l Facebook

Join the Joyful Courage Facebook group: Live and Love with Courage.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Eps 47: Honoring our Inner Voice with Kris Prochaska Jun 14, 2016

Show notes

Welcome! My guest today is Kris Prochaska, a former therapist who uses her intuition, diagnostic skills, and ability to read people’s energy. Her desire is to coach women in how to embody sacred leadership at home and at work to listen and live according to their inner voice. Kris was a 2015 TEDxBend speaker and is the author of Life Well Spoken: Free Your Inner Voice and Prosper. She is a busy mom to Anja, 7, and Eli, 11, and is happily married to—and still in love with—her hubby, Mike.

What you’ll hear in this episode:

Kris began her career journey as a therapist, but tired of focusing on what’s “wrong.” She wanted to discover what’s “right”!
Kris approaches her coaching sessions under the premise that the client really does know best.
Kris discusses her TED talk experience and the responses she received to her topic: Why don’t we see our kids as equals?
Kris shares the irony in her TED talk in that she was not in alignment with her natural energy and truth.
The goal in parenting is NOT to control our kids, but to teach them to use their tools to become their very best.
Our kids are equally deserving of dignity and respect, but that doesn’t mean there are no limits or boundaries.
The parenting attitude should be, “What’s in the highest and best good for our family in the long term?”
We should listen to the voice of our kids and let them be a part of decision-making.
We’re afraid if we teach them to listen to themselves that they will run rampant.
The “little voices,”—do YOU hear them? They seek to make you look good, stay safe, and fit in-- -no matter what.
How do you tell the difference between your “little voices” and your intuition?
The “little voices” will make you feel small, constricted, and pressured.
Your true inner voice is expansive, calm, and peaceful.
Your energy shift can affect those around you.

What does Joyful Courage mean to you? “When we have the courage to step into that inner voice place and what we know, it takes courage to do that over and over again. The returns are infinite. That’s the blessing we give to the world.”

Resources:

www.krisprochaska.com

Find her on Facebook and Instagram: MessyMysticMama.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Ask Casey Eps 3: Back Talk Jun 09, 2016

Show notes

Here is what I got from a listener:

Hey lady!

As I said in my post, Sheane (my teacher ;)) is really volatile right now, and so much of what she's saying is full of disrespect and sass. Oh, and often high volume. It's driving me nuts. I suspect it's because summer is upon us, and she is worried about the transition, having to say goodbye to her teacher, etc., as she's so sensitive so it's freaking her out. If I say, "Please sit down and finish your breakfast" (she gets up several times during mealtimes, mostly to cartwheel), she'll yell, "MOM! Stop telling me that! I was going to!!!" Or, she's started to respond, "I don't care!" or "I don't have to!" Shaun and I have really been working on our tone with each other and the kids, so I feel like we're really modeling ways to disagree, ask questions, etc., without being disrespectful. And, we've been working on our connection with her, each of us committing to ensuring that she is feeling that sense of belonging and significance. So, I'm somewhat stumped now as to where to go with this. Often she's outright saying, "NO!" or is moaning and groaning about every situation, even when choice and inviting language is used. I did just take the "is your child sensitive" quiz that was posted on the FB page, and she scores off the charts. Thoughts? This child is teaching the hell out of me.

So grateful for parents who reach out for support!! Enjoy this episode of Ask Casey as I do my best to share advice and feedback on this behavior that drives us ALL mad!!

Back talk video
Article on consent – good man project
“Our kids are doing the best they can with the skills they have.”
What/How questions
Connect before correct
Get curious about your child’s experience too
Offer the opportunity for a redo
They need to have the space for you to say “that wasn’t the best way to handle this situation, let’s try it again.”
Practice being non-attached (don’t take it personally)
“Tell me about that…” and then LISTEN DEEPLY
The goal is to help our kids build skills to navigate disappointment in a way that isn’t hurtful to others, themselves or the environment around them.
Soothing basket PDF
Hold space for them to be uncomfortable and trust them to get to the other side
::::::::::
Listeners!!! Chime in with your thoughts!! What are your tips/thoughts/experiences around setting limits for screen time??
Join the conversation on the live and love with joyful courage page
If you have questions for an Ask Casey episode, fill out the form and send it my way!!
::::::::::
THANK YOU!!

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Eps 46: Dr. Michele Borba and Why Empathy is the Antidote to the Selfie Culture Jun 07, 2016

Show notes

Welcome! My guest today is Dr. Michele Borba, a globally-recognized educational psychologist and parenting, bullying, and character expert. Her aim is to strengthen children’s empathy and resilience to break the cycle of youth violence. She has delivered keynotes and workshops to over 1 million participants on 5 continents and authored 24 books translated into 14 languages. Her latest book is out on June 7, and is titled Unselfie: Why Empathetic Kids Succeed in Our All-About-Me World. Parents and educators will benefit greatly from Dr. Borba’s wisdom and insights. Join us!

What you’ll hear in this episode:

Michele has experience as a special education teacher and working on school shooting prevention and bullying prevention programs.
Much of the world’s violence narrows down to the primary need of empathy.
What is empathy? The ability to “feel” with someone, to step in and understand where another person is coming from.
Empathy has emotional and cognitive components.
In researching her book, Michele learned from Holocaust rescuers that empathy was modeled for them by their parents, so it was natural for them to care about helping others.
In the last 30 years, empathy in children has dropped by 40%, while narcissism has increased by 58%.
Michele explains “The Selfie Syndrome” and how it kills empathy.
Michele shares the following about learning empathy:
It’s a “womb-to-tomb” scenario, so you can start learning at any age.
Children are hard-wired for empathy at birth.
Infants go through the first step of empathy when they attach to their mothers.
Around age 1, emotional literacy begins when a child understands another’s clues to sadness or hurt.
The problem today is that children are learning to tune in to digital devices and not to each other.
#1 Tip: Teach your child to look at the color of the eyes of the person speaking to learn to “tune in.”
Michele’s book teaches activities to cultivate empathy, to listen better, and to stand up to a bully.
How to teach children the A, B, C’s of recognizing stress
The “empathy gap” of overwhelmed kids
Many “self-regulation” techniques are recommended in the book.
Why we MUST teach coping strategies to our kids!
How to teach them to take care of someone else’s heart
Why saying “I’m sorry” is NOT the best option
Michele gives some baby steps that parents can take as a starting point to increase empathy in their kids.
“Think Big, Start Small”---choose ONE thing to do
Michele has “Bully Buster” techniques and skills in the book.
What does Joyful Courage mean to you? “Joyful Courage is the most wonderful concept you can imagine. Having courage brings real joy. We need to build kids from the inside out. It’s the real miracle point of your heart opening to another.”

Resources:

www.commonsensemedia.org

www.micheleborba.com

Find Dr. Borba on Facebook and Twitter and find her books on Amazon.com.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Eps 45: Deborah MacNamara helps us Make More Sense of our Kids (and humans in general) May 31, 2016

Show notes

Dr. Deborah MacNamara is a brilliant voice in parent education and if was so fun to get to know her on the podcast!

Dr. Deborah MacNamara is on Faculty at the Neufeld Institute and author of Rest, Play, Grow: Making Sense of Preschoolers (or anyone who acts like one) She presents, teaches, and writes on all facets of child and adolescent development based on the relational-developmental approach of Gordon Neufeld. She is also in private practice where she offers counselling services to parents and professionals in making sense of learning, behavioural, and developmental issues in kids. Deborah is a dynamic teacher and experienced counsellor who makes developmental science come to life in the everyday context of home and classroom.

She was an amazing guest and I KNOW you will be left is awe of all you have learned while listening to our conversation!!

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

BONUS: Aromatherapy Lessons from Victoria Sexton of Natural Goodness Skincare May 26, 2016

Show notes

In this bonus episode, I talk with my friend, Victoria Sexton all about how to use aromatherapy for wellness.

She breaks down what essential oils are, how to use a diffuser, and how to handle it when theres loads of snot and a cough (thats when I typically cross over to the over the counter stuff).

I know you will find value in this show and walk away feeling super excited about using aromatherapy in your home. My diffusers been ordered.

From Victoria -

Antibacterial Essential oils:

Orange Eucalyptus Rosemary Frankincense Lavender Peppermint

Note: Do not apply essential oils to infants. Use a diffuser instead. For kids years 2 and above use a dilution of 1% of essential oils (6 drops per ounce).

How to follow Victoria:

www.natural goodnessskincare.com Facebook Pinterest

THANK YOU FOR LISTENING!!! I am so honored to have you out there, appreciating the conversations happening here. Please reach out, check in, let me know what you love about the podcast. Let me know your questions. I am here for you!!

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Eps 44: Rebecca Eanes talks about Parenting the Sensitive Child and her Journey to Positive Parenting May 24, 2016

Show notes

I am so honored to have Rebecca Eanes on the podcast this week!!

Rebecca Eanes is a best selling author, the founder of positive-parents.org, creator of Positive Parenting: Toddlers and Beyond, and a contributing editor to Creative Child Magazine where she does most of her writing currently. Her books are The Newbie's Guide to Positive Parenting which has been a #1 best seller in it's category on Amazon, and a co-authored book, Positive Parenting in Action: The How-To Guide to Putting Positive Parenting Principles in Action in Early Childhood, which has also been an Amazon best seller internationally. Her new book, Positive Parenting: An Essential Guide, will be released on June 7, 2016. You can preorder it now at Amazon.

Blog posts and articles by Rebecca mentioned during the podcast:

Parenting the Highly Sensitive Boy Disciplining the Sensitive Child Create A Calm Down Area Does Time-In Reward Children?

Books mentioned on the podcast:

The Highly Sensitive Child by Elaine Aron The Strong Sensitive Boy by Ted Zeff Parenting Without Power Struggles by Susan Stiffleman

Pre - Order Rebeccas new book - Positive Parenting: The Essential Guide NOW

With your preorder you will receive exclusive access to her Facebook Book Club experience where you will get support from Rebecca, complimentary PDF for each chapter, support and accountability for lasting change, AND be entered to win books, ecourse and parent coaching sessions with top parenting coaches!!

Follow Rebecca:

www.positive-parents.org Positive Parenting Toddlers and Beyond Facebook Page Positive Parents on Pinterest @BeckyEanes on Twitter @RebeccaEanes on Instagram

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Eps 43: Jiovann Carrasco Talks Mindfulness and Parenting May 17, 2016

Show notes

Welcome! My guest today is Jiovann Carrasco, a psychotherapist in Austin, TX. Jiovann is the owner of the Austin Mindfulness Center, a meditator, and the author of an online mindfulness program called Follow your Breath. He is an engaged and connected father to two young kids and worked as a stay-at-home dad for two years! Let’s jump into this topic of mindfulness with Jiovann!

What you’ll hear in this episode:

How Jiovann began practicing meditation in 2008, as a result of the anxiety and panic attacks from his stressful job as a therapist at a group home
How Zen meditation changed Jiovann and allowed him to connect with himself like never before
How does Jiovann define mindfulness? “Attending to whatever arises in the present moment without trying to change it or judge it.”
Jiovann explains the benefits to mindfulness in parenting.
Why Jiovann took a popular course on Positive Discipline and became a certified parent educator
Jiovann explains how to bring mindfulness to even the everyday mundane tasks required in parenting.
How Jiovann structures his early morning meditation practice and time with his kids
How kids already know how to be mindful and present WAY more than adults
Fearful thoughts and worries are what our minds naturally focus on; mindfulness finds ways to shine the spotlight on anything else in the present moment.
Jiovann recommends two books: Planting Seeds by Thich Nhat Hanh and Sitting Still Like A Frog by Eline Snel.
Jiovann explains the basics of his 6-week, on-demand, online course. See details below!
What does joyful courage mean to Jiovann? “Mindfulness is one of the most courageous things to do. It’s intentionally moving toward the fears, and joy and happiness are natural by-products.”

Connect with Jiovann:

www.austinmindfulness.org (Find information on the course, Follow Your Breath, including meditation audio, downloadables, journals, practice logs, videos, and access to the Facebook group. The normal price is $299, but through the end of 2016, the course is available for 50% off. But wait, it gets better!

FOLLOW YOUR BREATHE MINDFULNESS COURSE:

For JCP listeners, take an additional 35% off, which brings the price UNDER $100!) --- CLICK HERE FOR THE DISCOUNT!

Facebook l Twitter l Instagram

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Ask Casey Episode 2 Setting Screen Time Limits May 12, 2016

Show notes

A question from Maria…

My 6yo loves his ipad and tv, like I'm sure they all do. I don't allow him to play non-stop and he's generally ok with boundaries. My issue is he's always asking. ALWAYS. I'm forever saying no, or later, or ok for half an hour, or after you do this or that. I'm the bad guy when he really wants to and I'd rather he do something more constructive. I'd like to put the power in his hands, instead of mine, but how. I thought about giving him a weekly limit and letting him go free, when his limit is met, no more screens. But how, he's 6 and doesn't really get time management. Plus, school days vs weekends (and now summer) are different. Right now he doesn't have homework, but when he does, screens should be very limited (I'd imagine) and I don't want to break a habit when that starts. On the weekends, in the morning, he gets to play/watch until dad and I get up and make breakfast. Than maybe more later, but it depends on what we're doing. Ugh this is only going to get worse when he gets older. I'd like to set some limits he can follow on his own, so I'm not the dictator. One that won't allow him to be on it for hours. His attitude is awful if he's been playing a long time, shoot that happens to me too!

I am not an expert on screen time – we are first generation of parents parenting kids with crazy access to screens, also we are the first parents to ALSO have this access.
We are the models
Time on the screens is time not connecting with other human beings in our life
Root of the problem is disconnection
No perfect answer
No screens Vs No Limits
Lots of room in the middle for skill development, self regulation practice, time management exploration
Have a conversation about what you are noticing and invite him to speak into his experience
Look at the week and the days – then decide what could work for you, what he would like, whiddle it down to a place where you are both satisfied
Blog posts:
Earning Privileges
Earning Privileges, Revisited
No magic number of miutes
Comes down to provide an opportunity for your six year old to be a part of the problem solving process
We must give them experience for practicing negotiating, offer/counter offer
Notice rigidity
Showing up with your plan in mind will not be helpful
Go into the conversation to deeply listen and be open minded
Use visuals so that he knows when screen time is
Give opportunities to be autonomous
Try the solution for a week and revisit – tweak if necessary
Our children are full of creative ideas
When we are a part of the problem solving, we are more likely to follow through with the solution
Use daily special time to connect and continue to strengthen relationship
When we strengthen relationship with our kids we are increasing our kids sense of belonging and significance
When you notice things are challenging, turn your lens towards the relationship

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Our TOPPODCAST Picks

Follow Us

Stay Connected

Joyful Courage for Parenting Teens

Related Podcasts

Links

Stay Connected