Honest Women

Latest Episodes:

14. Embracing Our Younger Selves: Navigating Inner Conflicts while Visiting Family Jul 12, 2023

Show notes

Summer is here, which means family vacations and, often, an increase in the time we spend with our extended family. Have you ever found yourself reverting to a younger version of yourself when you're around your family? I know we have! It's a complex dynamic that many of us grapple with. In today's episode, Andrea and Jessica get honest about how these dynamics can often overwhelm us, leading to behaviors that seem out of sync with our adult selves. We introduce you to Internal Family Systems, as people, NOT as therapists, to better explain our different parts and their protective roles.

Throughout the episode, Jessica dives deeper into the psyche of her 14-year-old self. A protective part that often shows up when visiting family. We all have that adolescent within us, scared and vulnerable, stepping up to shield us from perceived threats. But do they still need to shoulder that burden? We discuss how to speak to these parts and reassure them they're safe now.

Lastly, we explore the paradox of our need for connection and the tendency to withdraw when navigating family dynamics. We emphasize how understanding our needs, communicating them effectively, and extending compassion towards ourselves can make a difference. We also highlight the power that lies within us in influencing how others perceive us.

Join us on this journey of self-discovery, and vulnerability, as we learn to embrace our younger selves with compassion and understanding.

Connect with Us:

Follow Honest Women Podcast @honestwomenpodcast

Follow Jessica: @jlhutchisonlcpc

Follow Andrea: @andreaburkly

Learn more about the Honest Women Podcast: www.honestwomenpodcast.com

Honest Women is the podcast for every woman juggling the demands of modern life (while trying to keep her shit together) and finding that it’s all just a little more difficult than she thought it would be. Your hosts, Andrea Burkly and Jessica Hutchison, are two very real mental health professionals who are taking honest conversations from inside their offices to the outside world.

Disclaimer:

Please note while this podcast features two therapists, and may feel very therapeutic, this is not therapy! Please be entertained, and know that through our creative content, we are not providing mental health care. No diagnosis. No treatment. No medical advice. Just creative content. Please seek appropriate mental health support in the real world.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

13. Is a 50-50 Split of Domestic Labor Realistic? Jul 05, 2023

Show notes

The sun is hot, the sky is blue, and domestic labor should be split 50-50 between husbands and wives. OBVIOUSLY.

Yet, for something that virtually every woman we know believes to be true (and holds very dear), that dang 50-50 split is REALLY hard to achieve!

So why does the work of running a household and raising children seem to fall more heavily on women's shoulders? Why does the mental load of managing allthethings also fall on women? Why does it seem like it's our responsibility to fix the imbalance, when it's identified?

And given all of these things, how are we supposed to discuss domestic responsibilities without devolving into attacking, defending, blaming, and resentment?

Inspired by a high intensity text exchange (some would say "debate") (and by "some" we mean Jessica), Andrea and Jess find ourselves in rare form as we discuss this tricky topic live. Andrea has heart palpitations. Jess plays devils advocate. Andrea enters the confessional. Jess references The Breakup (please call us, Jennifer Aniston!). And at the end of the episode, Jessica heartily laughs while Andrea declares "I hate this episode! I hate this conversation! I'm backing away from everything I said!" (see the clip on Instagram @honestwomenpodcast).

WOULD YOU LIKE YOUR QUESTION TO BE PART OF AN UPCOMING HONEST WOMEN EPISODE? Or want to send Jess some love for challenging your closely-held beliefs? Or send Andrea your best anxiety-management tips for the next time Jess feels like debating? Send us an email at hello@honestwomenpodcast.com

Disclaimer:

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

12. Should we Strive for Independence or Interdependence? Jun 28, 2023

Show notes

Hands up if you have ever heard the term INDEPENDENCE used as a marker of success and strength. Time and time again, we have women coming into our offices, prideful about being an “independent woman.” Is the quest for independence holding us back? Join us as we redefine what it means to be a strong, successful woman in today's world by debunking the myth of independence.

Throughout this episode, we discuss how the pursuit of independence can lead to feelings of shame and guilt when we can't do everything on our own. We shed light on the importance of dependence and connection, and how they can actually lay the foundation for true independence. We also share personal stories about how relying on others has empowered us to take risks and make significant changes in our own lives.

Finally, we dive into the concept of interdependence as an alternative to our current idea of independence. We explore how our personal histories may have instilled a fear of dependence, and how we can challenge this fear to embrace a more balanced, interdependent way of living. So, take a moment to explore your own definition of independence and consider if interdependence might be a better fit for you. Don't miss this thought-provoking conversation that could change the way you view your relationships and personal growth.

Connect with Us on Social Media:

Follow Honest Women Podcast @honestwomenpodcast

Follow Jessica: @jlhutchisonlcpc

Follow Andrea: @andreaburkly

Do you have a topic you want to hear us get honest about?

Email us at HELLO@HonestWomenPodcast.com.

Learn more about the Honest Women Podcast: www.honestwomenpodcast.com

Disclaimer:

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

11. Three Universal Reasons Why Being Married Is Hard Jun 21, 2023

Show notes

On today's MUST SHARE episode...

If you've been married for any significant period of time, you know that marriage is hard. So why is it that every person who comes into our offices seems to feel like they are the only one who is struggling?

Join us as we highlight three key reasons that virtually every modern marriage is hard:

From ever-increasing amounts of responsibility that leave us exhausted, burnt-out, and without time to tend to ourselves or our relationships;
to the ways that our pasts influence our present behavior (and often in ways that vex our partners!);
and the differing ways that partners try to seek closeness when feeling disconnected ("some of us seek connection emotionally... and some of us want to have sex!"), it' a set-up, folks!

But maybe if we can be honest about the fact that marriage is hard, not because we're failing but because it just is, we can take a deep breath, show ourselves (and our partners) some grace, and give ourselves a high five for trying to make life work with another human.

Also this week: find out why Jess can't stop laughing when Andrea talks about date nights; revel in Jessica and Andrea's vast nautical knowledge as they describe rowing a sail boat in a truly excellent but maybe not accurate analogy for marriage; and learn why saying "it's not a big deal" is ACTUALLY A VERY BIG DEAL.

WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU! And... you'll never believe this... we stepped into the 21st century and got ourselves an email address:

hello@honestwomenpodcast.com

Let us know what you think of the episode, tell us what you want to hear about next, or submit a question for us to address in a future podcast episode. We can't wait to connect!

Disclaimer:

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

10. Redefining Happily Ever After: The Realities of Marriage and How Early Messages Alter Expectations Jun 14, 2023

Show notes

Growing up in divorced families, we've always been hyper-aware of the so-called "happily ever after" myth in marriages. As married women and EFT-trained couples therapists, we discuss our unique perspectives on what makes a happy marriage and the challenges that come with it. But what does "happily ever after" really mean, and is it even achievable?

In today's episode, we dive into the pitfalls of unmet marriage expectations and explore the importance of redefining "happily ever after" for each couple. It's not about perfection but rather openness, connection, and willingness to turn toward one another despite adversity.

Join us for an honest conversation about the realities of married life. Let's challenge the traditional notion of "happily ever after" together and redefine what it means to be truly committed to one another. With open dialogue and a commitment to growth, perhaps we can find our own unique version of happiness in our relationships.

Notes Regarding Today's Episode:

The quote referenced in today's episode is by the great Esther Perel, who states, “Divorce happens now not because we are unhappy, but because we could be happier.” For more information visit her website:

https://www.estherperel.com/

For more information on Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy visit: https://iceeft.com/what-is-eft/

Connect with Us:

Follow Honest Women Podcast @honestwomenpodcast

Follow Jessica: @jlhutchisonlcpc

Follow Andrea: @andreaburkly

Learn more about the Honest Women Podcast: www.honestwomenpodcast.com

Disclaimer:

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

9. BOUNDARIES! How to Identify, Set, and Defend Them Jun 07, 2023

Show notes

All the cool kids (aka, Instagram therapists) are talking about boundaries... which means that while most people who come into our offices have heard of boundaries and know that they should have them, there is a lot of confusion around actually doing the damn thing.

If you've ever wondered:

What in the world are boundaries, anyway?
Which boundaries should I have?
How do I set a boundary?
Do I actually haveto tell other people what my boundaries are?? (or can I just whisper *boundaries boundaries boundaries*, blink three times, and do the I-Dream-of-Jeanie nod and we're good?)
And if boundaries are so magical, why doesn't my (spouse / boss / self) respect them when I set them?

You're in the right place! We'll not only fill you in on the basics, but share our personal experiences with boundaries, too. Andrea doesn't hold back when talking about the hardest person for her to set boundaries with (HERSELF), and Jessica gets real when discussing a recent moment where she was defending her boundaries... unnecessarily. Plus, we pour one out for the other pop-psychology buzzwords that have come into and out of favor (we're looking at you, self-care); leaving group chats as a cop-out way of communicating boundaries; and how we've been socialized as women to not set boundaries in the first place.

If you're ready to feel more responsive to your own needs and empowered in your relationships with other people, this episode is for you!

Disclaimer:

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

8. Facing Our Body Insecurities (During Swimsuit Season!): How the Pressure to Look a Certain Way, Effortlessly, Impacts Us All May 31, 2023

Show notes

Swimsuit season is upon us, and not everyone is feeling as confident as 81-year-old Martha Stewart on the cover of Sports Illustrated.

But it's not just swimsuit season where we feel the pressure to look a certain way, effortlessly, while exuding unwavering confidence... this pressure has been with us for as long as we can remember! Join us as we reflect on our own experiences of growing up in the Kate Moss era of the 90s; facing puberty; dealing with eating disorders; trying to meet body goals at every stage of life (for the wedding! vacation! postpartum!); navigating changing body trends; the effort we put into looking good, how we're just as likely to be criticized for "trying too hard" as we are for not meeting impossible standards; and how all of these things shaped the relationship we have with our bodies today.

We also reference Sir Mix-a-Lot, remember Snackwells and Olean, and try to get really vulnerable while Jessica is being attacked by fruit flies - a type of body-distress that we hope no one else is feeling right now.

If you're a woman who lives in a body, this episode is for you! And if you know any other women who live in bodies (and we know you do!), please SHARE this episode with a friend!

DO YOU LOVE HONEST WOMEN?! Please leave us a 5⭐ rating and a review - we love to hear from you!

CONNECT WITH US:

Follow Honest Women Podcast @honestwomenpodcast

Follow Jessica: @jlhutchisonlcpc

Follow Andrea: @andreaburkly

Learn more about the Honest Women Podcast: www.honestwomenpodcast.com

Disclaimer:

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

7. The Pandemic may be Over, But Life is NOT Back to Normal May 24, 2023

Show notes

The Covid-19 pandemic is over… or is it? Today Andrea and Jessica get honest about how the pandemic STILL impacts our relationships, work, and health and what needs to be acknowledged before we can consider moving forward.

Listen in as we discuss:

The aftermath of the pandemic and how we are still managing the fallout today.
How the Covid-19 pandemic completely flipped our worlds upside down, altering everything from how we work to how we communicate.
Relationships that were altered, changed, or forever lost.
The impact of fear and how it became the force behind everything we did or did not do.
Acknowledging: our relationships need healing, our work requires new boundaries, habits, and re-connection, and our health needs attention. This might be the only way forward.

DO YOU LOVE HONEST WOMEN?!

If you know a woman who could use a little more honest conversation in her life….aka every woman ever…please SHARE this podcast with a friend!

If you like what you hear, please leave us a 5⭐ rating and a review - we love to hear from you!

CONNECT WITH US:

Follow Honest Women Podcast @honestwomenpodcast

Follow Jessica: @jlhutchisonlcpc

Follow Andrea: @andreaburkly

Learn more about the Honest Women Podcast: www.honestwomenpodcast.com

Disclaimer:

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

6. SUMMER IS COMING (and moms are scared!) May 17, 2023

Show notes

Summer is coming! Which means sunny, stress-free, lazy days for kids and… pretty much the exact opposite for Moms. Today Andrea and Jessica get honest about what summer is REALLY like for the women who are in charge of making it memorable.

Listen in as we discuss:

Dealing with the frantic pace of May when we have no energy to care about it
The mental load of planning for summer and how we (both!) already failed at planning
The anxiety caused by dealing with constant schedule changes
Why we reject summer bucket lists
Specific challenges for working and stay-at-home moms
And why moms should be recognized as the heroes of summer

DO YOU LOVE HONEST WOMEN?!

If you know a woman who could use a little more honest conversation in her life….aka every woman ever…please SHARE this podcast with a friend!

If you like what you hear, please leave us a 5⭐ rating and a review - we love to hear from you!

Connect with Us:

Follow Honest Women Podcast @honestwomenpodcast

Follow Jessica: @jlhutchisonlcpc

Follow Andrea: @andreaburkly

Learn more about the Honest Women Podcast: www.honestwomenpodcast.com

Disclaimer:

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

5. What Honest Women REALLY Want for Mother's Day May 10, 2023

Show notes

In today’s honest conversation, we talk about Mother’s Day. A day when we, as mothers, are supposed to celebrate the joys of motherhood while being showered with love from those around us. We see pictures of love, happiness, and well-behaved, perfectly dressed children on social media. Is this an accurate depiction of Mother’s Day?

Listen in as we get HONEST about:

What women REALLY want for Mother’s Day.
Knowing what women really WANT, how in the heck do we get that?
A few things we have learned from our OWN experiences.

DO YOU LOVE HONEST WOMEN?!

If you know a woman who could use a little more honest conversation in her life….aka every woman ever…please SHARE this podcast with a friend!

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