HEALTHY FAMILY CONNECTIONS

Latest Episodes:

To End Bullying, End The Bullying Culture Oct 08, 2019

Show notes

In this episode Neil offers a cultural perspective for Anti-Bullying Month. He speaks to the many faces of bullying and he uses an example of a youth who withdrew from middle school to avoid a bullying culture to demonstrate how important cultural change is to end bullying. Neil explains how the current political climate is making the whole country feel unsafe and praises individual acts of courage that take on bullying. Neil challenges listeners to see where they can act to challenge a bullying culture. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

Our Daughter Is Stressing Us All Out Oct 01, 2019

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In this episode Neil responds to a Mom whose gifted talented daughter signs up for everything and stresses herself and everyone else out. Neil looks at the different causes of youth over-commitment and stress and helps this Mom find the right parenting approach to change the family dynamic. Neil address when individual therapy is a good choice for this this teenager and when it is a bad choice. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

I Thought I Knew My Kid Sep 24, 2019

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In this episode Neil responds to a Mom who's son was arrested for stealing pot. Mom was shocked because, while her older son was very challenging, this came out of the blue. Neil takes a deeper look at the dynamics that led to this including the Control Battle with the older brother and the impact it had on the whole family. Neil explains the impact of peer pressure and neuro-development on teen behavior, the risks of mediocrity, the opportunity offered by a crisis, and how individual therapy with teenagers too often colludes with the problem. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

Do We Still Give Allowance, When Kids Don't Do Their Chores? Sep 17, 2019

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In this episode Neil responds to a Mom wanting to know if giving allowance to her 12 and 14 year olds should be tied to whether or not they do their chores. She's heard that they shouldn't be tied together, but is concerned that offering allowance when her kids are not being responsible or respectful is sending a wrong message and it makes her feel taken advantage of. Neil takes a higher-level look at kids participating in home responsibilities and having their own money, and offers this Mom a path forward. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

How Can I Support My Anxious Young Adult? Sep 10, 2019

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In this episode Neil responds to a Mom who is supporting her daughter with Anxiety Disorder financially and emotionally. Mom is wondering how best to help her develop her independence and if it makes sense of her daughter to come home, push reset, and start over again. Neil shows Mom how to take herself out of the helper position and how doing less will actually be doing more to help. Neil challenges parents and therapists to pay attention to the parent / young-adult relationship as a place that must be addressed for any therapy to be successful. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

Parental Anger Is Normal Aug 27, 2019

Show notes

In this episode Neil responds to a Dad who has a well functioning 15 year old son, but goes into a rage when his parents say "NO". Dad and Mom have been following "good parenting" models and avoided getting angry. Now they can't establish effective limits. Neil explains the difference between destructive parental anger and healthy parental anger. He explains the potential negative consequences of this going on any farther and offers this Dad, a script to get his son on a healthy developmental path forward. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

Where Do I Start When Everything Is Out Of Control? Aug 13, 2019

Show notes

: In this episode Neil responds to a Mom who was involved in threats and counter threats with her 16 year old daughter. Now her daughter is out of the house and Mom is needing help knowing how to move forward. Neil explains how law enforcement can support parental authority and the difference between youth who act out with emotional issues and youth who have not yet internalized a value system. He offers this mother a strategy for ending the Control Battle, and getting her family the right kind of therapy. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

Two Critical Skills For Dealing With An Unreasonable Adult Aug 06, 2019

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In this episode Neil responds to a man who's wondering if the advice to validate your partner, applies if your partner is disordered and highly unreasonable. Neil explains that validation is not agreeing and explains and demonstrates how validation and limit setting go together and how to do both the right way. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

When Do I Pull The Plug On Our Marriage? Jul 23, 2019

Show notes

In this episode Neil answers a question from Mary who's husband makes special deals with the kids and tells them not to tell their mother. She's extremely frustrated and wondering if she should end the marriage. Neil speaks to circumstances that would warrant ending a marriage, but challenges Mary to bring her best self to her marriage as well as the counseling she's frustrated with. It's only when we aren't participating in the problem, that we'll know if things can get better or if we need to "pull the plug." Neil offers Mary a plan to bring to her next counseling appointment. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

Cell Phones Are Ruining Our Family Jul 10, 2019

Show notes

In this episode Neil answers a question from a Mom who can't get the phone away from her 14 year old daughter. Mom is wondering how families are managing life with cell phones. Neil offers essential wisdom for teens and cell phone use, and shows this Mom that her daughter is struggling with loneliness and feeling disconnected in her family and gives Mom some powerful tools to turn things around. Neil invites listeners to look for the hidden message behind negative behaviors and address the problem rather than punish the behavior. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

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