Grace Enough Podcast

Latest Episodes:

45: Barbara Reaoch | Advent with Children Nov 19, 2019

Show notes

Barbara and I chat about advent and celebrating it with the children in your life by keeping it simple and focusing on a few key truths about Jesus. 2:57 Barbara introduces herself, shares about her time working for BSF, and talks about writing materials for children and families 4:04 Barbara shares how she came to know Jesus

"When Christ reached out to me and gave me faith to believe my life was radically changed. His love filled me to the point that His love overflowed to my children."

7:50 Bible Study Fellowship

"When I first started reading the Bible I thought I would open it up and I would hear God telling what I needed to do. It was only as I began to study the Word of God that I realized that the Bible is His voice lovingly directing me to know Him."

"When God calls you to something, as you well know, it is often out of your inadequacy that He says, 'Step forward with me in faith to do this and I will show you that I am trustworthy. It's not about what you're bringing to me. It's about what I will give to you.' As I depended on Him, I experienced His power doing in me and through me what He had called me to do."

Barbara originally wrote devotional's and books for her grandchildren while she was living in South Africa.

Bible Study Fellowship Easter and Christmas helps for children

13:13 Barbara answers 2 questions: 1) What is advent? 2) Why is it important to?

"Christmas promises us so much more joy and deeper, lasting truth than tradition ever could."

"Advent is important because it's another time for parents to pass along the great truths of the gospel and to know God's Word has the power to change kid's lives."

A Jesus Christmas: Explore God's Amazing Plan For Christmas

16:09 Barbara shares some practical, non-stressful ways to participate in advent as a family.

"Jesus is the Prince of Peace....He ushers peace into our hearts as we make Him central in our family's life."

"Keep it simple. Keep Christ central in a simple way. It will be far from simplistic. It will just be simple in terms of time and activity."

"We step into the area of trying to make the tradition the main thing instead of keeping Christ central. There's lots of ways to keep Christ central other than sticking to a particular time and method. Don't make it about the method or the system or the tradition. Make it about Christ."

Layer the information.

22:06 Barbara answers the question: Is it possible for young children to grasp the concept of "waiting" for the coming Messiah?

"Our children will not understand all of that, but we can try to connect those truths to their world in something they do know." Example: Waiting for a sibling to be born. Waiting for their birthday.

SHOW NOTES continued

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44: Rebekah Hargraves | Christian Legalism Nov 12, 2019

Show notes

Rebekah and I chat about what her Christian life was like when it was legalistic driven vs. Bible and grace driven. We chat about reading Scripture in context and allow Scripture to interpret Scripture. We also chat about some red flags of Christian legalism.

5:10 Legalism is heavily weaved through Rebekah's story. She shares how she came to know Jesus and what her faith journey was like in its early years?

Titus 2: 4-5

Situational ethics can be easy to fall into as a child or new believer.

Deut. 22:5

"I took it personally that my parents were not on board...It was almost a security issue for me. I was basing my identity, my security, and who I was in these beliefs that I thought were thoroughly Biblical."

11:54 Rebekah defines legalism as lived out in her early Christian journey

"I was a Pharisee...I would take something that may have been a principle...and I would add to it all sorts of additional requirements."

14:47 Rebekah discusses what took place in her life that led her to begin addressing the legalistic Christian life she had been living?

It was the light of Christ in another girl whose clothes did not measure up to her idea of Biblical dress.

17:41 Rebekah shares a few of the beliefs she held that were legalistic driven vs. Bible driven

"I would ignore the passage about Deborah."

"I got to the point where I would rather know what the whole cannon of Scripture says and be willing to embrace all of it and allow Scripture to interpret Scripture and be open to whatever it said and allow me then to have to be changed (which is painful, but it's worth it)."

Examples like Huldah the prophetess

21:31 Rebekah shares how fear can often motivate legalism

"You have, maybe, a good intention, but you have become so afraid of doing something wrong, that you add all these extra parameters, all these extra barriers to keep you from that. Boundaries are good, but if you make those into law and force them on everybody else, act as if they're what the Bible says, then you have trouble. It was a thing of fear, because I wanted to honor God, but I couldn't just rest in what the Bible actually said believing that if God has not laid down a command in this area, apparently it's okay for there to not be a command....I couldn't rest in that. I had to add to it in order to feel okay, to feel better, to feel safe, and it became a thing where looking back on it, I thought I knew better than God."

SHOW NOTES continued

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43: D.L. Mayfield | When Refugees Become Neighbors and Friends Nov 05, 2019

Show notes

Danielle introduces herself and shares about working with Somali Bantu Refugees in Portland, OR while she was attending Bible College.

"That experience changed my life and it upended the way I saw the world...I really had to address these two basic questions: Is my religion really good news for people who aren't just like me?...The second, is my country good news for someone who isn't exactly like me?...That is, sort of, where my life has taken me, since I was 19, on this journey with God trying to ask those questions and having my life be changed mostly by refugee communities here in the U.S."

7:19 Danielle shares how she came to know Jesus. 10:19 The subtitle of Danielle's book Assimilate or Go Home is Notes From A Failed Missionary On Rediscovering Faith. She shares a little how she failed, and what she discovered about her faith.

"I have been working in refugee communities now for almost 15 years and I have failed to convert anyone to be just like me. I'm a white, evangelical, middle class American woman and nobody has turned out just like me."

"Then, I was like, now what? In my classes I was never taught what to do when people were like thank you, but no. I sort of had the impression that you are supposed to move on. You are supposed to go find other people. You are supposed to keep going and try to find the ones that will convert and instead I felt God say, 'I want you to stick around. I don't want you to go anywhere'."

Catholic Charities

16:49 Danielle describes a season in life where she began to shift from the kingdom of God as a spiritual concept to the kingdom of God as being here and now, a changing of the world to reflect what God desires.

Study how Jesus did His own ministry to further understand the Kingdom of God.

Luke 4

Proclaim good news to the poor
Set the captives free
Recover site for the blind
Set the oppressed free

SHOW NOTES continued

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42: Brandy Goebel | Hope and Healing After Marital Infidelity Oct 29, 2019

Show notes

Brandy and I chat about her extra marital affair and the work God has done in her life during the past 10 years since the affair ended. We chat about the unrealistic expectations we often put on our spouse, destructive behavior we use to numb ourselves, the Christlike invitation from her husband, and pressing in to recovery work.

6:08 Brandy shares how her faith journey with Jesus began

10:07 Brandy shares how she and Matt met. She talks about the early years of their marriage

Youth With a Mission (YWAM)

Discipleship Training Course
Year of Biblical Studies

"When God is pursuing you, you can not outrun Him...but I sure tried."

"We got married in 1995 and I expected that everything from that point on was going to be exactly as I had planned...We're going to have 2 kids. We're going to have a cat and a dog. a white picket fence and he's going to be the spiritual leader and I'm going to be the Donna Reid type of wife....and that is 100% not what happened."

16:45 Brandy shares some of the warning signs in her personal life and in marriage that she can now see were precursors to her extramarital affair

It boils down to unrealistic expectations..."I had the notion somehow that Matt would be able to meet all my needs."

Brandy is an enneagram 4- "I need a ton of validation." Matt is anenneagram 5. "He is very much a thinker."

"I don't fault myself for having those needs, but I fault myself very much for where I was looking for those needs to be filled."

20:09 Brandy shares about how the affair began. We chat a little about the danger of thinking, "It will never happen to me."

Every Young Woman's Battle

Every Young Man's Battle

"One day a door opened and we both just decided to walk through it. And it wasn't anything either of us had planned. It wasn't anything we had set out to do, but it was definitely something...we had both imagined or fancied or fantasized about for years."

23:55 Brandy shares her thought process and ideas about God while involved in the affair

"I was running so far from God....Our marriage looked like it was doing fine. Anybody on the outside would have said our marriage was good. And the whole time I am thinking, 'I am living a complete double life, but if God didn't want this to be happening, then why would He allow all of these opportunities for us to keep getting together. He wouldn't allow it, if He didn't want it to be happening. 'So it was the most bizarre justification you can possibly imagine, because I knew God wasn't approving of this relationship, but it didn't seem like He was closing the doors to it either and for some reason that seemed logical to me."

27:30 Brandy shares about when the affair was exposed

SHOW NOTES continued

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Listen to The Road Home To You Podcast with Brandy and Matt HERE.

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41: Susan Alexander Yates | Thriving in Transition Oct 22, 2019

Show notes

Susan and I chat about learning to walk through transition with a sense of adventure vs. anxiety, about setting realistic expectations, and constantly focusing on the character of God.

4:28 Susan shares how her journey with Jesus began

8:36 Susan shares some typical life transitions

Susan’s article: How to Trust God in the Midst of Transition

“You have to learn to change your expectations.”

“It helped me to name it, re-entry. When you return from something special, where you leave responsibilities and you come back to responsibility, just count on being a little blue. Call it re-entry and realize it will go away in three days.”

“We tend to think and live as if stability is the norm. That’s what we expect, when things just calm down, but the reality is life never calms down. We have to switch gears in terms of our expectation. Our expectation is not that stability is the norm, but the reality is transition is the norm…Stability is those rare exceptions. I think the first thing that helps with coping with transition is to realize that this is the norm.”

12:03 Susan shares how she learned to view and walk through transition with a sense of adventure vs. anxiety

"When you are young and a young mom, you have this vision, one day I will get there, to whatever that mystical there is. The there is where you trust Christ. You live in that trust relationship. You don't struggle. You don't have fear. You don't fall a part. We have this unrealistic expectation that we'll get there, but really we'll never get there this side of Heaven. In heaven, we'll be there, because we are fallen people in a fallen world. We're citizens of Heaven, so we will always have this bit of restlessness within our soul of wanting to get there. It is a God given restlessness, because we were created for Heaven, not this earth. The question is, how can we grow in relying more on God and being less controlled by the frantic things going on in our lives?"

One way you can deal with transition is anticipate and plan ahead as best as you can (ex. setting realistic expectations when you go home with baby #4).

Psalm 139: God knows us

"Who is in charge? Not right now. Who is really in charge? God is in charge and He's got my back"

SHOW NOTES continued.

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40: Tim Challies | Spiritual Discernment Oct 15, 2019

Show notes

Tim and I chat about spiritual discernment. What is it? How to grow in it? How it relates to wisdom and more.

5:01 Tim defines spiritual discernment

“The ability to tell what is true as opposed to what’s false on an objective level and then on a moral basis the ability to distinguish what’s right and what’s wrong.”

5:33 Tim answers how one goes about obtaining discernment.

Primarily by spiritual growth, Christian maturity

6:38 Tim answers the question, “Are wisdom and discernment synonymous?”

“Wisdom is a knowledge of the Lord, so knowing who God is and what He demands of us. Discernment is…comparing that [who God is and what He demands of us] to the evil alternative and being able to separate the two.”

7:23 Tim discusses if we can have wisdom or discernment without the other

“One of the conundrum’s of the Christian life is how some people who are so godly in some ways can be naïve in other ways, so I think we both know people who love the Lord deeply and have followed Him for a long time and still don’t seem to have really developed the kind of spiritual discernment we might expect.”

8:48 Tim talks about Solomon and how his life relates to discernment, wisdom, obedience, disobedience, and worldliness

“I do think there are people who don’t fit our neat categories, he [Solomon] may be one of them.”

“God specifically told the kings of Israel not to accumulate women, wealth, or the weapons of war. In all three ways, they’re supposed to be sexually pure and then, when it came to the military, they were supposed to rely on God and when it came to wealth they were not to hoard it. They were to be dependent upon God and be generous. Yet, Solomon was known for his extreme wealth, his great number of wives, and his strong military, so he disobeyed God on a very fundamental level there, so again that seems to be foolishness that he exhibited there or just plain disobedience. Maybe, we’re dressing it up to much. Maybe, he just stopped caring and grew apathetic.”

SHOW NOTES continued.

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39: Jeannie Cunnion | Mom Set Free Oct 08, 2019

Show notes

Jeannie and I chat about parenting from a place of grace and conviction vs. perfection and condemnation.

4:00Jeannie talks about the season of mothering that led her into writing Parenting the Wholehearted Childand Mom Set Free

"I started on this journey in Scripture, what is His grace and what does it speak into the hard places of motherhood? And then, I just felt like He [God] was inviting me to share that, which I didn't understand, because I wasn't a writer...but as we all know where the Lord calls, He equips." "He wants to set us free from that pressure to get it all right..."

8:09 Jeannie shares what it was like when she parenting with a mindset of "I have to be a perfect example" or my kids will be messed up.

"There was so little joy in the day to day, because I was so focused on me getting it right."

"One of the most beautiful things about grace is God works through our weakness. His goal is ultimately for our children's eyes to be on Him, not on us."

"...Really just learning how to understand my weakness in light of God's grace and know that it's not something to be ashamed of or feel guilty about, but it's always an invitation to return to the cross and say Jesus, 'Nothing in my hands I bring, simply to they cross I cling. Thank you that you never give up on me.' Because grace doesn't just free us. It transforms us."

"It's not a bad thing to want to get it right for them [our children]. But when we want to be on the throne, when we want to be worshipped by them, when we want to be looked at by them as flawless and invincibly, that's where we have to step back and be like, Who do I want on that throne? Do I want you looking to me as your perfect example or ultimately....looking at Jesus?"

15:32 Jeannie shares some of the changes she experienced in her parenting when she began parenting from a gospel and grace filled perspective.

"If there is not internal heart change, all we are doing is raising rebels who will ultimately break free from the laws we put in place that they are confined to. They're performing to expectation, but there is no internal heart change going on. God said, He who began a good work in you will complete it on the day that Jesus Christ returns and so sanctification is a life long process."

"Beauty and brokenness dance."

SHOW NOTES continued.

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38: Mo Isom | Sex, Jesus, and The Conversations The Church Forgot Oct 01, 2019

Show notes

Mo and I chat about how God created sex, how honesty about sexual sin defeats the enemies schemes, how God desires a pure heart, and privacy vs. darkness.

5:11 Mo begins by sharing how she came to know Jesus and an overview of what she wrote in her first book Wreck Your Life.

"I knew a lot about God, but I didn't know God and there's a big difference."

High School: "I didn't know who I was or whose I was. I didn't know how that whole Jesus component merged into the other 6 days of the week, so when identity issues came perfectionism began to bind me in a lot of ways."

Come to me all who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest. -Matthew 11:28

"His [God] invitation to me was just begin to give Me the glory. You've lived so focused on self....Look at the things I am doing and we'll go from there."

"I went from this incomplete perspective of God to God in a box..to still this incomplete view of God: I give You the glory and You give me the blessing."

"Suicide suddenly interrupted my story, especially the spiritual side, this faith walk layer. Suddenly this God I had been following and tip toeing with and figuring out and seeing all the goodness of, I felt like was a faros or had abandoned me or was not as good as I thought He was. Suddenly when things didn't feel so good or the circumstances didn't look so good in life I took off running. I ran into depression, into anxiety, into promiscuity, into any sin sized piece I could find to fill the God sized hole in my heart."

John 16:33 says, In this world you will face trouble, but take heart, have courage, I have overcome the world.

"When we know God. When we hunger and thirst for His Word. When we know the character and nature and complexity or who He reveals Himself to be to us , there is a vast difference in how we handle the hardships. There is a divine hope in the valley."

"He will wreck your life to save your life and save your eternal story."

"I will use anything and everything to disrupt your lost journey and point you back home and lead you and intersect your heart and your life."

Be still and know that I am God -Psalm 46:10

25:10Mo shares what led her to write her 2nd book Sex, Jesus, and The Conversations The Church Forgot.

"Scripture says sin is defeated by the blood of the lamb and the word of our testimony, so I think people seeing they're not alone in something and hearing the radical truth of God all over it has been really neat to see the wave it has created."

SHOW NOTES continued

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37: Dr. Lindsay Hinson | Foster Parenting Sep 24, 2019

Show notes

Lindsay and I chat about her journey of becoming a foster parent, the need for more Christians to step into the role of foster parenting, and what she would like the biological parents of her foster children to know.

3:52 Lindsay shares how her relationship with Jesus began

6:05 Lindsay shares how she and her husband became foster parents

"In our church, there was a lot of national talk bubbling up about social justice...."

Micah 6:8

West Florida Foster Care

"This organization was going to churches and to Christians and was saying, 'We are in a capacity crisis here and we don't have people stepping up.' Hillsborough County is the worst in the state of Florida, in terms of the number of children that are removed from their homes."

8:29 Lindsay shares some of the fears she experienced prior to becoming a licensed foster parent

Biggest fear: How having a foster child would affect her biological children.

"We've been very open with our kids about why we have chosen to foster, about who Jesus is, and what He calls us to do, and about the lives our children lead and how different they are from the lives of our foster children. How the inequality of justice should spur us on, so our kids our incredible."

SHOW NOTES continued.

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SPONSOR: Hope Threads

Click over and check out their new fall line.

This organization was founded by moms in north Raleigh, who have been inspired and motivated to join with highly resilient and talented refugees as they learn English, and develop marketable skills to support their families. These women come from countries with political turmoil, where they had to fight for the safety of their families. They’ve been given the opportunity to come to the United States and the challenges still exist, though they’ve changed face. Their children are generally thriving in school, though they lack the language skills to understand what’s being said in parent teacher conferences….or to know how to get their children proper medical care in the maze of a medical system.

Hope Threads was born out of relationships formed over years of serving these women by teaching them English or caring for their children as they learn. They are graciously hosted by North Ridge Bible Chapel and have virtually no overhead costs, as volunteers teach sewing skills and care for children in a gospel centered children’s program.

You can find them online at hope-Threads.com or on Instagram at hope.threads.

Your purchase empowers a resilient woman as she acculturates, learns new skills, and supports her family. Please visit Hope Threads to view their catalog and for OPPORTUNITIES to SPONSOR refugee women.

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36: Treva Kuyper | Hope and Healing After Unexpected Loss Sep 17, 2019

Show notes

Treva shares with me her story of losing her husband, Jeff, in a tragic car accident. She walks through her grief during the first few months following his death and how God has walked with her and her children every step of the way. She encourages widows and shares of Christ's redemptive work through her suffering.

Raleigh Muralist: Lisa Gaither

4:58 Treva begins sharing her faith story with us and what life has looked like for her the last 5-10 years

She and her husband, Jeff, were married for 22 years.

8:16-17:04 Faith and grief collide in Treva's story. She takes us back to 2017 and walks us through the tragic car accident where her husband lost his life.

"That was something I feared, losing my husband. He was such a good dad, such a great husband, a godly man, very strong in his faith. I used to call him, my Boaz. I didn't think from the abandonment I had already suffered as a daughter that the Lord would ever allow me to be a widow (before 80)."

Treva and her husband, Jeff, did ministry to teens together for 17 years.

"Your dad makes sure you have fun and I make sure you're alive."

17:06 Treva shares about what the months were like following the loss of her husband, Jeff.

"It was the most beautiful act of love that the Lord had for us every day that week. It is where joy and sorrow collide. Where we saw the hand of God so mightily, but in the worst circumstance. I used to always says, 'We have the best scenario in the worst circumstance,' just how God carried us. If I had ever doubted God's love for me or for my kids, it was in those first few months afterwards that God solidified for me who He is and how He loves our children....He doesn't have to have all the pieces that we think He has to have to finish the good work that He started in them."

18:53 Treva shares how her relationship with God changed as a result of losing her spouse, her best friend.

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