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    Comedy

    Good Children

    Childhood best friends Joe Hegyes and Andrew Muscarella spent their youth chasing gold stars—now they’re just trying to stop sucking in their stomachs. Each week, they unpack a shared history of anxiety, performance, and the side effects of being a little too well-behaved.
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    Copyright: © 2024 Joe Hegyes and Andrew Muscarella

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    Latest Episodes:
    When Will We Stop Hating Ourselves? Nov 02, 2022
    Show notes

    BUCKLE UP FOR A HEAVY EPISODE. The boys talk self-loathing, guilt, shame, being the Anti-Hero, Taylor Swift, Andrew getting taken to the Honor Council, lying, fessing up, breaking down, binge eating, and more in this deeply psychological episode of Good Children. PLUS: A FULL Midnights review.

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    Twitches Take Halloweentown Oct 26, 2022
    Show notes

    You’re invited to a JOE HEGYES HALLOWEEN PARTY. Bring out the marshmallow mummies, fire up the smoke machines, get to work on your costume, because stakes are HIGH. On this VERY SPOOKY EPISODE of Good Children, Andrew and Joe walk through some of their favorite Halloween memories (including every costume they’ve literally ever done). Halloweentown was gay representation, Joe was problematic, and we ALL love Brenda Song.

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    Being Gay On YouTube Oct 19, 2022
    Show notes

    On this very viral episode of Good Children, the boys travel back to the dawn of time and a land before TikTok: the internet in the late 2000s. From Farmville to Facebook to Grape Lady Falls, Joe and Andrew explore the holy times of performance on the early internet. After unpacking the deep psychosis of Andrew's acapella days, the boys react to a few of their videos #FromTheVault. PLUS: live show planning, LGBTQIA* allyship lessons, and more.

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    It All Goes Downhill After 4th Grade Oct 12, 2022
    Show notes

    Get your permission slipped signed, it’s time to go on a field trip with Good Children! In this hyper-descriptive episode, Joe and Andrew walk you through some of the most memorable experiences they’ve ever had— all involving trips. From running for Mayor in 5th grade (you’ll never guess who wins), to risking your life for a school play (you’ll never guess who’s driving the car), to enjoying a stay at Universal Orlando Resort, this episode as it all.

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    BAD INFLUENCES: virginity & boston (First 10 Minutes) Oct 07, 2022
    Show notes

    Surprise: we're officially on Patreon! We're excited to share a side of us you don't normally get on the pod and have the chance to work closely with our listeners on creating the BEST content yet. This is a clip from "bad influences," our first Patreon-exclusive series where we get a littttttle tipsy on camera. The cuts are slower, the vibes are chiller, and the stories are even more vulnerable. Check out the full episode at the link in our bios!

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    Grindr In Your Hometown Oct 05, 2022
    Show notes

    In today’s VERY SPECIAL EPISODE, join Andrew and Joe in Joe’s childhood home as he dog sits on Long Island for the weekend. The boys cover everything from Grindr in your hometown to girls who had ferrets as pets. Whether you self-identified as Jay Gatsby in high school or believe you could win a verbal argument with a pigeon, this episode has something for everyone: from Long Island culture to ghosts caught on camera. Come one over and sit a spell as Joe struggles to tame a 6-month-old puppy and Andrew silently suffers from digestive trauma.

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    Coming Out Sep 28, 2022
    Show notes

    In this reflective episode of Good Children, Andrew and Joe journey through the moments in their life they tried their hardest to be the best little boys in the world. From a Cub Scouts cheating scandal to a religious education chocolate bar MLM to praying the gay away, the boys come to realize that only shooting stars break the mold. For the first time ever, Joe and Andrew tell their long-requested coming out stories.

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    English Teachers Are Allies Sep 22, 2022
    Show notes

    WE'RE DOING OUR FIRST LIVE SHOW ON NOVEMBER 22ND AT THE BELL HOUSE IN BROOKLYN. CHECK INSTA FOR MORE DETALS! - Who do you have for AP Bio? Are you dressing up? Should we audition for the musical this year? It’s the first day of school for our Good Children and things get weird fast when Andrew confesses his genuine love of math. This episode is essentially a trauma dump of Andrew fighting his teachers sprinkled in with some good old fashioned nostalgia. The bus is here, gtg!

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    Disney Adults Anonymous Sep 14, 2022
    Show notes

    Pumpkins, fawlling leaves, the prowess only a flannel can bring, republican energy. It’s officially fawll at Good Children HQ and the boys are inviting you to share in their seasonal spirit. From pumpkin picking photoshoots to the clown epidemic of 2016 to dressing up in full drag to go to Disney as an adult, Joe and Andrew unpack it all. Come along on a $15 hayride and practice your dynamic lumbar stretches as we prepare to pick the hottest pumpkin in the patch!

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    F.A.Q.QOTS Sep 07, 2022
    Show notes

    Ask box is officially open! Join Andrew and Joe as they get HONEST when answering YOUR questions. Ponder life’s greatest mysteries like: Lizzie McGuire or That’s So Raven? What does Andrew love about Joe? When did Joe first listen to Taylor Swift? And more! Things get emotional, things get comical, and things get a little too serious on this week’s Good Children!

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