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    Comedy

    Good Children

    Childhood best friends Joe Hegyes and Andrew Muscarella spent their youth chasing gold stars—now they’re just trying to stop sucking in their stomachs. Each week, they unpack a shared history of anxiety, performance, and the side effects of being a little too well-behaved.
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    Copyright: © 2024 Joe Hegyes and Andrew Muscarella

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    Latest Episodes:
    The Bushwickification of Boy Bratz Mar 22, 2023
    Show notes

    Bratz. Max Steel. ZhuZhu Pets. Scented Shrek Dolls. Today's episode is an interactive experience with some of the toys that raised us. Why do Boy Bratz give Bushwick twink? Why is Max Steel a circuit gay? Why did Joe put the cursed Shrek sunflower in his mouth again? Unpack the trauma of Toy Story, Chucky, and American Girl Doll Horses with us this week.

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    Video: The Dangers of Marijuana Mar 15, 2023
    Show notes

    We made it to graduation day! 12th grade brings new hopes, dreams, and fears as Joe and Andrew sort every iconic American chain restaurant on the Kinsey Scale. Why were we made to believe college admissions counselors were stalking our Facebook albums? Why was Andrew dressing like a 60-year-old father of 3? Were we bad children the whole time?

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    The Dangers of Marijuana Mar 15, 2023
    Show notes

    We made it to graduation day! 12th grade brings new hopes, dreams, and fears as Joe and Andrew sort every iconic American chain restaurant on the Kinsey Scale. Why were we made to believe college admissions counselors were stalking our Facebook albums? Why was Andrew dressing like a 60-year-old father of 3? Were we bad children the whole time?

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    The Definitive Ranking of Lindsay Lohan Movies Mar 08, 2023
    Show notes

    Let's find out why Joe's emotionally stunted and never learned to drive and the official definitive ranking of every Lindsay Lohan movie ever in this episode all about 11th grade! (Sorry for the reupload)!

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    Video: The Definitive Ranking of Lindsay Lohan Movies Mar 08, 2023
    Show notes

    Let's find out why Joe's emotionally stunted and never learned to drive and the official definitive ranking of every Lindsay Lohan movie ever in this episode all about 11th grade!

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    Video: The Long Island Hunger Games Mar 01, 2023
    Show notes

    Things take a dark and scary turn in 10th grade for Joe and Andrew. Between fatphobic lacrosse coaches and homophobic theology teachers, the boys learn more about each other than they ever knew possible in this introspective deep dive into some stories you know and love-- and some you'll wish you could forget.

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    The Long Island Hunger Games Mar 01, 2023
    Show notes

    Things take a dark and scary turn in 10th grade for Joe and Andrew. Between fatphobic lacrosse coaches and homophobic theology teachers, the boys learn more about each other than they ever knew possible in this introspective deep dive into some stories you know and love-- and some you'll wish you could forget.

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    video: the next george santos Feb 22, 2023
    Show notes

    Take a deep breath as you walk through the doors it's the morning of your very first day. Today's episode is all about ninth grade!!!! Freshman year is host to so many firsts, embarrassing moments, and learning lessons. For Joe, it was time to become a guido (and join The Order of the Phoenix). For Andrew, it was time to become a jock (and stan Katy Perry). Let's reflect on the wonderful woes of being 14 years old in 2010 and all of the drama, missed connections, and body dysmorphia that comes along with it!

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    the next george santos Feb 22, 2023
    Show notes

    Take a deep breath as you walk through the doors it's the morning of your very first day. Today's episode is all about ninth grade!!!! Freshman year is host to so many firsts, embarrassing moments, and learning lessons. For Joe, it was time to become a guido (and join The Order of the Phoenix). For Andrew, it was time to become a jock (and stan Katy Perry). Let's reflect on the wonderful woes of being 14 years old in 2010 and all of the drama, missed connections, and body dysmorphia that comes along with it!

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    an (uncut) improvised date Feb 14, 2023
    Show notes

    What do you think would happen if we never met? Joe and Andrew explore the very dark and troubling possibility of being total strangers meeting in their mid-20s for a drink on Valentine's Day. Enjoy this departure from Good Children's usual programming in which the boys genuinely do an hour long improv with minimal editing and get progressively drunker.. how decadent!💕

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