Football Cliches

Latest Episodes:

The most comprehensive definition of 'ghosting in' of all time Oct 31, 2023

Show notes

Adam Hurrey is joined by David Walker and Nick Miller on the latest Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: whether or not a player's nickname can be inspired by a player from the same division, what constitutes a "late show", the art of the fake final whistle, the so-called refereeing "Big Two", an absurd development for Footballers' Names in Things, and which European clubs are eligible to be their country's "giants".

Meanwhile, the panel define which errors are the most 'schoolboy' and try to calculate the maximum speed and distance of a player "ghosting in".

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The Pure La Liga XI Oct 26, 2023

Show notes

Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare, David Walker and Jack Lang to compile the quintessential lineup of players from the last few decades of Spanish football and its many idiosyncrasies.

The selection panel weigh up "the Spanish Dave Beasant", at least three left-backs called "Fran", the inevitable Joaquin, a 7/10 story about Ruben Baraja, some pretty playmakers, an astonishing number of Serbians and a heartbreaking choice between two ageing Basque goal-getters.

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Sean Dyche's Glasto, cheat codes and a data dive into 'too little, too late' Oct 24, 2023

Show notes

Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker on the latest Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: a triple helping of "footballers' names appearing in things", Sean Dyche describes his Glastonbury weekend exactly as a football manager would, what constitutes a "crisp finish", footballing "cheat codes", early consolation goals and a potential fixture pile-up in an actual farmers' league and Richard Keys's latest irritation.

Meanwhile, the panel ponder how many goals behind a team has to be to "have it all to do" and wonder why nobody's ever seen a footballer sneeze mid-game.

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Background pub TV games, flip flaps & the quiet dignity of a club-branded mug Oct 18, 2023

Show notes

Adam Hurrey, Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker entertain the listeners' entries for Mesut Haaland Dicks, as the Clichés faithful nominate their niche footballing fascinations and irritations.

Among the selections are the political influences on modern-day school playground football, unacceptable names for skill moves, subtle ways to declare your club allegiance to office colleagues and a deep analysis of the lure of a background pub TV game that you didn’t think you'd care about.

Meanwhile, the Adjudication Panel enjoy some classy co-commentary from Dion Dublin and contemplate the cricket equivalent of footballing "dreamland".

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Electric in the air, the 'chipped in with X goals' threshold & Our Summer With Richard Keys Oct 17, 2023

Show notes

Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker as the Cliches podcast returns with the first Adjudication Panel of 2023/24. The agenda includes: how and when a player can be “electric”, some scepticism about Dominik Szoboszlai’s Steven Gerrard-inspired tattoo, a sensational description for a central-midfield partnership and a long-awaited catch-up with Keys & Gray.

Meanwhile, the panel challenge the current “tackles always look worse in slow motion” dogma and decide, once and for all, how many goals constitute “chipping in” to a team’s season.

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The Football Clichés podcast is back! (Trailer) Oct 11, 2023

Show notes

Why do we talk about football the way we do? Adam Hurrey’s truly unique podcast returns to explore the glorious and unique language of football: the words, the phrases, the mannerisms and, above all, the clichés. It’s a podcast about everything we take for granted about the modern game.

Twice a week, the Football Clichés Adjudication Panel will rule on the latest crimes against football’s complex language, select obscure themed XIs, welcome star guests to choose their niche footballing loves and hates, and much more.

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