Enneagram and Marriage

Latest Episodes:

Healing from an Emotional Affair with Josh and Katie Walters Jan 22, 2024

Show notes

When you're in a really thin season with your temperaments both on override and also hiding vulnerabilities, you're bound for difficult marriage territories you hardly recognize, territory where you're tempted to blame your spouse or lose your marriage altogether. For Josh and Katie Walters, it was too, and it was a big something: infidelity.

Today as guests on the pod, Josh and Katie speak to the pain behind infidelity and more importantly, how to courageously walk forward in actually loving your spouse versus merely following your feelings, as they listeners who feel exactly the way they did: lost, hopeless, and unsure of how to fix their marriage.

This episode lays out the principles Josh and Katie Walters learned in that season when God healed and restored their marriage and they're sharing them here for you to glean from their story and the pages of their book, Same Couple, Different Marriage: Don't Let Your Worst Days Be Your Last Days. Watch on YouTube here

Find Josh and Katie's website and book here!

Katie on Instagram

Josh on Instagram

Join early bird rates for the Wholehearted Empower and Equip Leadership Conference with Amy Wicks

Become an Enneagram & Marriage Coach this Feb 15, 2024 (use the code COACHINGFUN for $500 off)

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The Three Desires in Marriage: An E + M Mini Episode Jan 16, 2024

Show notes

During these winter months when everyone is hibernating, it can be tempting to turning inwards and shut off your love. In this mini-episode, Christa helps you to rev up your love together again as you learn tips to relight the fires of desire. We’ll talk about safety, sex, and society as you warm up by the glow of your love!

Let us also know if you’d like to join us in our E + M Certified Coaches Course that starts February 15, 2024, and runs for 12 weeks! Let's dig deep together! $500 off with coupon COACHINGFUN here: https://www.enneagraminyourmarriage.com/emcoaches

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Finding the Way of Love in a World of Hurt w/Grammy-Award Winner Charlie Peacock & Andi Ashworth Jan 15, 2024

Show notes

When we're feeling weary, our temptation is often to run away from the very things that heal - authenticity, community, sacred daily rhythms, and most of all, Christ. We can even allow our creative outlets to be another way of escapism, or move so fast into the "post-human" world of bots and "ten easy steps" that we miss relating and sharing Christ's love. Today we get to talk about this human tendency and about finding our truest mission - and solace - in real community and giving as Christ shows us how to do. We get to talk about all of this and more with the incredibly talented and world-renowned couple, husband and wife duo and four-time-Grammy Winner and musician and producer Charlie Peacock and gifted award-winning writer Andi Ashworth together as they discuss their new beautiful book, "Why Everything That Doesn't Matter, Matters So Much: The Way of Love in a World of Hurt" as they teach us lessons they've gleaned across five seasons of marriage from Carnegie Hall to the jitcken, and so much more! Watch on YouTube

Pre-order their book at Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Everything-That-Doesnt-Matter-Matters/dp/140033764X

For all your relationship needs, visit www.EnneagramandMarriage.com

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Delving Into the Enneagram 4.5 Space in Marriage with Sharleen Joynt, 4w5 and Andy Levine, 5w4 of Dear Shandy Jan 10, 2024

Show notes

The 4.5 space in marriage is a beautiful place to create, plan, dream, and think, yet this pensive space can keep partners lonely without healthy habits and movement. Today we give our audience tips for finding safety and respect in the depths of the heart and mind with the generous help of the wildly popular husband-and-wife podcast host team, Sharleen Joynt, 4w5, and Andy Levine, 5w4 of the Dear Shandy podcast, as they humorously but soulfully and honestly allow us to plunge the depths of their relationship space. In this extended episode, we also cover how Sharleen was also on "The Bachelor" and performs across the world as an award-winning opera singer, and we talk about what Fours and Fives bring to media spaces as well. Tune in to this unique, comedic, and deeply thoughtful episode here!

Visit the Dear Shandy Podcast here or search "Dear Shandy"

The story of how Andy and Sharleen met on the pod

Visit the Dear Shandy Instagram here (the link in bio links out everything!)

For those who may want to enjoy Sharleen's opera pieces, visit here

Find the Enneagram in Marriage Course here!

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How Do We Grow Closer Together with the Enneagram in Marriage? Jan 08, 2024

Show notes

In this inspiring getting-your-love-back-on-track episode, Christa takes you through several seeming paradoxes of relationship health on this heart-to-heart journey. We look closely at the work every personality type needs to do as they face the issues of independence versus leaning in, self regulation versus spousal care, and how to establish social bonds to encourage you both as you begin walking toward your partner. Come away from this episode with newfound courage, wisdom, intimacy-building, and most of all an increased urge to love. Watch on YouTube here!

Christa also shares about a brand new 5-week course beginning live over Zoom for you, The Enneagram in Marriage, so those wanting a deeper dive and some accountability can grow across the semester together!

We talk specifically today about:

Self-discovery through the lens of the Enneagram

Asking for needs to be met while also learning self-soothing

Talking with your partner about issues of depth while also having fun and dreaming together

Join The Enneagram in Marriage 5 Week Course Here

For all your relationship needs, visit www.EnneagramandMarriage.com

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A Fresh Take on the Four Attachment Styles with Dr. Anita Kuhnley Jan 03, 2024

Show notes

One of the key factors that will determine how healthy you are in your marriage is and will always be working with your attachment styles and responses to threats and triggers. Yet the typical attachment wiring labels (secure, disorganized, anxious, withdrawing, and more) also need more fleshing out as well as acceptance, for each part of you has a role to fulfill to protect you and make you feel safe. As we open the new year, Christa is joined by Dr. Anita Kuhnly (Baker Books, The Four Relationship Styles) as she walks us through the four styles, helping you to walk through stumbling blocks to safety in finding your deepest love. Watch on YouTube:

👩‍🚒a Firefighter w/ a depth of character not easily won, 🕵️‍♂️ an investigator w/ superior, analytical skills, 👮‍♀️ a competent & independent security guard, 👨‍👨‍👦‍👦 or a networker, who thrives on connection? Dr. Anita helps us to know that every style comes w/strengths & vulnerabilities and yet understanding the practical implications is a game changer & can help you spend more time at the top of your game.

Order her pre-bonuses here: https://dranitakuhnley.com/products/pre-order-a-signed-copy-of-the-four-relationship-styles-how-attachment-theory-can-help-you-in-your-search-for-lasting-love

Dr. Anita's Instagram page, The Empathic Counselor https://www.instagram.com/the.empathetic.counselor/

Join The Enneagram in Marriage 5 Week Course

For all your relationship needs, visit www.EnneagramandMarriage.com

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Bringing the Big 5 to Your Life & Relationships This New Year! Jan 01, 2024

Show notes

When it comes to personal and marriage growth this 2024, it's helpful to have not only a type-finding tool like the Enneagram but a trait finder like the most empirically scientifically studied personality test, the Big Five, to go along with it. Let Christa guide you on a relationship-based Big Five convo as you find out how you score on Openness, Conscientiousness, Extroversion, Agreeableness, and Neuroticism scales, and allow yourself to come into some refined New Year's learning with us as you do! Watch on YouTube!

Take the Big 5 Personality Test here! https://www.truity.com/test/big-five-personality-test?ver=control

Get signed up for the Enneagram in Marriage 5 Week Course right here! https://enneagramandmarriage.myflodesk.com/dsn5x683vo

Read Christa's Substack on Openness here!

Get all of your relationship tools here! www.enneagramandmarriage.com

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FREE Subscriber Series Episode: What to Do When Instincts Take Over Dec 27, 2023

Show notes

When any one of your SP (self-preserving), SX (sexual), and SO (social) instincts is taking over, you'll find yourselves in a sad or collapsing marriage state, maybe even metaphorically dying as a couple. Couples who want to grow and thrive need to use thinking skills also as well as to distinguish feelings versus just using automatic responses. In this final episode of the year, join Christa in walking you through the rubble to hope on the other side with tips and tactics for finding your deep love again. Watch on YouTube here!

5 Week Course Sign Up

Find your E + M freebies here! https://www.enneagraminyourmarriage.com/freebies

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Deepening Intimacy in Marriage With Prayer & Scott Kedersha, Type 3 Dec 24, 2023

Show notes

Author Scott Kedersha, Enneagram 3 (3-9 pairing) is not only a fellow Baker author with Christa but also the long-standing marriage pastor at Harris Creek Baptist Church out of Waco, TX. His conversations with couples over the last seventeen years have led him to understand the biggest themes in marriage issues also involve a lack of vulnerability and prayer in marriage. In fact, he's discovered that couples who pray together have unparalelled commitment and a far less drastic divorce rate, which is fascinating to hear about as he shares with us today. But what if we don't feel safe? What if we manipulate in prayer? Today we discuss this and so much more today with you in this special Christmas episode!

https://www.amazon.com/Ready-Knot-Prayer-Guide-Prayers-ebook/dp/B0BVZYMZ7F?ref_=ast_author_dpttps://www.scottkedersha.com/

Hardcover:

https://www.amazon.com/Ready-Knot-Prayer-Guide-Prayers/dp/1540902870/ref=tmm_hrd_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=

Visit Scott's website here!

www.Scottkedersha.com

For all of your relationship needs, visit www.EnneagramandMarriage.com

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Finding Kindness and Compassion Across Every Personality Type This Holiday Dec 20, 2023

Show notes

Every personality type in marriage DESPERATELY needs compassion and kindness if they expect the marriage to be joyful, yet kindness and compassion look different across personality types. Since each has a different main emotional and mental struggle, today on this E + M mini, Christa walks you through a baseline and type-by-type reminder of how you can stay strong yet kind and deeply joyful this holiday. For all, there are important and specific steps to add more kindness and compassion as well as to avoid criticism and complaining over the holidays, so you can get the fun moving forward. Take a deep breath and tune into this shortie episode as many times as you need for a much-needed holiday boost! Watch on YouTube here!

Marriage gift ideas mentioned in the episode here:

Use the code HUNDRED here for $100 our 5 session course with Christa in Jan here! https://www.enneagraminyourmarriage.com/thecourse/p/glow

Use the code HALFOFFHOLIDAY at www.suppersleuths.com for a fun mystery party game with your friends and family this holiday season!

Visit www.EnneagramandMarriage.com for all your relationship needs!

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