Destined To Be

What the Bleep Do We Know!?

Resources

The Enneagram Institute

The Secret

Neuro-Linguistic Programming

5 Steps to Help You Get Back on Track - EP098 Dec 01, 2020

Show notes

We ALL fall off track from time to time.

Your kids wake up early and disrupt your morning routine. The Little Cesar's breadsticks are too good to pass up. Or your partner leaves the cereal bowl on the counter and your anger gets in the way of accomplishing what you had planned.

So, what can you do to turn it around fast and get back to honoring the commitments you've made to yourself?

On this episode of Destined to Be, we're sharing our five-step process for getting back on track, explaining why it's important to identify what got you off course and process the negative emotions you're feeling.

We challenge you to welcome the lesson in falling off course, asking yourself how the situation might serve you and trying a different approach when you need to.

Listen in for insight on overcoming self-defeating thoughts and learn how to create a plan to get back on track ASAP!

Key Takeaways

How to do the things you know make you feel better (when it's easier not to)

The choice you have to be frustrated or not when your schedule is disrupted

Why it's crucial to get crystal clear on your goals and build a plan to achieve them

The BIG impact of a consistent effort to make small, incremental changes

Our 5-step process for getting back on track

Identify what got you off track
Let yourself feel the emotion
Welcome the lesson
Determine your next steps
Believe you're capable

How to identify the real issue behind your negative emotions and express those feelings calmly

Why we try to switch the focus instead of fully processing our emotions

The value in asking how the situation can serve you and trying a different approach

Why you might need to hire a coach to help you stay on track

How affirmations or a journal practice can help you overcome self-defeating thoughts

Connect with Jeremiah & Mallory

Dr. Susan David on The Ed Mylett Show

Resources

Emotional Agility: Get Unstuck, Embrace Change, and Thrive in Work and Life by Susan David, PhD

Neuro-Linguistic Programming

To Ease Anxiety, Boost Your EQ—with Brittney Connor-Savarda - EP097 Nov 26, 2020

Show notes

Are you feeling anxious this holiday season? Have you taken the time to explore WHY you feel this way?

If you're going into family get-togethers with a sense of dread, practicing emotional intelligence (also referred to as emotional quotient or EQ) can help you stay in control when family members criticize your choices and approach difficult conversations from a place of empathy.

Brittney Connor-Savarda is the emotional intelligence expert behind The Catalyst for Change, a coaching practice that helps high-achieving entrepreneurs and executive leaders remove the obstacles that are getting in the way of their personal fulfillment. She is also the host of Living and Leading with Emotional Intelligence and the author of The EQ Deficiency: How Emotional Intelligence and Compassion Can Cure an Emotional Pandemic, Solve Our People Problems and Be a Catalyst for Positive Change.

On this episode of Destined to Be, Brittney joins us to explain how a lack of emotional intelligence is at the root of the problems we face and offer strategies for developing our personal EQ. She explores what to do if your partner's standard for 100% is significantly different from your own, discussing why it's crucial to approach difficult conversations with a sincere desire to understand and correct yourself immediately when you say something you regret. Listen in for Brittney's insight on finding fulfillment inside yourself and learn how to navigate holiday anxiety with compassion for yourself and your family.

Key Takeaways

How a lack of emotional intelligence is at the root of the problems we face

The strategies for developing EQ outlined in Brittney's book

How Brittney defines emotional intelligence as the awareness and management of our feelings

The self-compassion and patience it takes to examine our own emotions

Brittney's work coaching parents and caregivers to model EQ for children

Brittney's advice for those of us going into the holidays with anxiety

How to set boundaries with critical family members and navigate the guilt of not being able to please everyone

How to identify the NEED behind the emotion you're feeling/receiving

Why it's crucial to approach difficult conversations with a sincere desire to understand

Why Brittney suggests correcting yourself immediately when you say something you shouldn't have

How emotional intelligence can help us mitigate disturbing thoughts

What to do if your partner's standard for 100% is significantly different from yours

Why fulfillment has to come from inside yourself, not external factors

Connect with Brittney

The Catalyst 4 Change

Brittney on YouTube

Brittney on Facebook

Brittney on Instagram

Living & Leading with Emotional Intelligence Podcast

The EQ Deficiency Podcast

Connect with Jeremiah & Mallory

The EQ Deficiency: How Emotional Intelligence and Compassion Can Cure an Emotional Pandemic, Solve Our People Problems and Be a Catalyst for Positive Change by Brittney-Nichole Connor-Savarda

Resources

Brittney on Destined to Be EP061

Marc Brackett

Permission to Feel: Unlocking the Power of Emotions to Help Our Kids, Ourselves, and Our Society Thrive by Marc Brackett, PhD

Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence

The Joe Rogan Experience

'I Failed the Covington Catholic Test' in The Atlantic

Julie Irwin Zimmerman

How to Get Out of a Relationship Rut - EP096 Nov 24, 2020

Show notes

Feel like your relationship is in a rut?

Yes, a date night can help spice things up. But if you're unhappy with yourself, a night out with your significant other can't fix that. To grow as a couple, both partners need to look inward and bring the best version of themselves to the relationship.

On this episode of Destined to Be, we're discussing how to get out of a relationship rut, explaining what we do to take stock of what's working in our marriage and what isn't and how we communicate our expectations to each other.

We challenge you to change your perception of your partner by focusing on the good and doing things to make them feel special—and owning it when you fall short.

Listen in for insight on why you can't show up for your partner when you don't feel good about yourself and learn how to build a vision of where you want to go as a couple that honors your individual and collective growth.

Key Takeaways

What it looks like to be in a relationship rut

Why it's crucial to take stock of what's working in your relationship and what isn't

How to develop an awareness of your expectations and communicate them to your partner

What we do to assess where we fall short for each other

Why you can't show up better for your partner when you don't feel good about yourself

How to build a vision of where you want to go as a couple

The distinction between intimacy and sex

How doing things to make your partner feel special can make you feel good

Why both partners need to adopt a growth mindset (though they may grow at different paces)

How to spice things up in your relationship with a date night

How to change your perception of your partner by focusing on the good

Connect with Jeremiah & Mallory

The Compound Effect by Darren Hardy

Resources

Darren Hardy

Throw Pillows on Destined to Be EP026

12 Steps

Dr. Alex Spinoso on Destined to Be EP067

The 5 Love Languages

How to Build a High-Performance Team—with Mike Metcalf & Shaun Peet - EP095 Nov 19, 2020

Show notes

More than 50% of American workers would trust a complete stranger over their boss. Heart attack rates are highest on Monday mornings. And more than 2/3 of US employees experience a lack of connection or inspiration in the workplace. So, how do we make our work environments more fulfilling and inspire people to show up as the best version of themselves? What is the secret to building a high-performance team?

Shaun Peet and Mike Metcalf are the head pit crew coaches for Chip Ganassi Racing and the cofounders of DECK Leadership, a business consulting firm that applies NASCAR pit crew performance strategies to the modern workplace, inspiring business leaders and their teams to discover authentic opportunities for diversity, efficiency, culture and kindness. Shaun and Mike are also the coauthors of 12 Second Culture: Speed Is the Currency of Business. Is Your Team Fast Enough?

On this episode of Destined to Be, Shaun and Mike join us to explain why culture is key to their success as pit crew coaches and explain how the principles they use to build teams translate to the corporate space. They explore why mindset has such a profound impact on the way we live our lives and share their intentional, standards-based approach to bringing on new team members at Chip Ganassi Racing. Listen in for insight on seeing your emotions as a suggestion rather than a directive and learn how to show people you truly care about them—beyond what they can do for you.

Key Takeaways

Why Mike & Shaun credit their success as pit crew coaches to culture

How Mike & Shaun's team building principles translate to the corporate space

How thoughts have a profound impact on the way we live our lives

The arrival mindset that helps Mike & Shaun's team show up as the best version of themselves

How perspective motivates us and helps us focus on the right things

Mike & Shaun's intentional approach to bringing on new team members

How to prepare your children for life's inevitable challenges

How to leverage your gifts to make a difference in the world

Why you can't pour into others if you haven't poured into yourself

How to reframe your emotions as a suggestion rather than a directive

Why standards move the needle more than goals do

How to show people you care about them beyond what they can do for you

Connect with Mike & Shaun

Connect with Jeremiah & Mallory

12 Second Culture: Speed Is the Currency of Business. Is Your Team Fast Enough? by Mike Metcalf and Shaun Peet with Stephen Copeland

Resources

Barium Springs Home for Children

Start with Why: How Great Leaders Inspire Everyone to Take Action by Simon Sinek

Tony Robbins

'Make Your Values Mean Something' in HBR

4 Tips for Navigating Family Holiday Events - EP094 Nov 17, 2020

Show notes

The holidays are supposed to be joyful. A time when we can slow down and connect with our family and friends.

And yet, many of us are anxious about the holiday season. We're stressed about running to multiple events in a single day or being triggered by Aunt Cindy's politics.

On this episode of Destined to Be, we're sharing our top 4 tips for navigating family holiday events, challenging you to go where you're celebrated, not tolerated, and offering insight on what to say if you chose not to attend a family event.

We explain how to adjust your attitude before you see family and set realistic expectations, describing why it may be difficult for people to understand your personal development journey and how to take the high road if Uncle John throws shade your way.

Listen in for advice on controlling your reaction when triggers arise and learn to leverage the vision of who you want to become to connect with family and friends this holiday season—whether or not you share the same views!

Key Takeaways

Why we choose to go where we're celebrated, not tolerated

What to say if you decide NOT to attend a particular family event

How to develop an awareness of WHY you're avoiding a situation

How we miss out on authentic connections when we're running from one event to another

Our top 4 tips for navigating family holiday events

Adjust your attitude before you go and set realistic expectations
Be mindful of triggers and continue to be the light
Accept that the only thing you can control is your reaction
Limit your alcohol consumption

Why it may be difficult for friends and family to understand your personal development journey

How to show respect and take the high road when your family provokes you

What to do if you're still feeling anxious after a holiday gathering

How to set the intention to connect with family and friends (even those who hold very different beliefs)

How to leverage the vision of who you want to become to have a happy holiday

Connect with Jeremiah & Mallory

75 Hard: A Tactical Guide to Winning the War with Yourself by Andy Frisella

Resources

75 Hard

Entrepreneurs' Organization

Work Through Fear, Fulfill Your Vision—with Aaron Opalewski - EP093 Nov 12, 2020

Show notes

Are you afraid to take the next step toward your vision for the future? Even the most successful people deal with fear on the daily. So, what separates the successful from the stuck? How do you learn to run toward conflict and face your fears head on?

Aaron Opalewski is the Founder and CEO of Spark Talent Acquisition, a staffing and recruiting agency out of Sterling Heights, Michigan. Since he started the company in 2013, Spark has grown from a team of five in a single office to an 18-state operation that will provide 3,000 opportunities this year alone. A driven entrepreneur with 13 years of experience in the recruiting industry, Aaron has impacted the performance and profitability of hundreds of businesses and thousands of people.

On this episode of Destined to Be, Aaron joins us to share his journey from personal training to entrepreneurship, describing what fuels him to work harder than everyone else and overdeliver. He explores what it takes to be wildly successful in your business and family life, explaining the relationship between being present and being effective with your time. Listen in for Aaron's insight on making decisions based on your values and learn how to navigate fear as you work toward your own bold vision for the future.

Key Takeaways

The lack of confidence that led Aaron to make poor decisions and get in trouble as a young man

Aaron's challenging transition from personal training to a sales role with a recruiting company

How being an undersized athlete fueled Aaron's drive to work harder than anyone else and overdeliver

The experience that taught Aaron he could learn anything he put his mind to

Aaron's insight around processes as the secret to scaling a business to multiple states

The role Aaron's relationship with God plays in his work

Why Aaron walked away from a successful multimillion-dollar company to start Spark Talent

How Aaron navigates the fear of working through each new level of uncertainty in his life

How Aaron makes decisions based on his vision and values

How Aaron's morning routine has pivoted through COVID

Why Aaron books time to work out and be present with his family on his calendar

What it takes to be wildly successful in your business and family life

The relationship between being present and maximizing the effectiveness of your time

Connect with Aaron

Spark Talent Acquisition

Aaron on LinkedIn

Aaron on Instagram

Connect with Jeremiah & Mallory

Traction: Get a Grip on Your Business by Gino Wickman

Resources

Arete Syndicate

Entrepreneurial Operating System

EOS Vision/Traction Organizer

75 Hard

The Ed Mylett Show

Principles: Life and Work by Ray Dalio

Ray Dalio's Principles in Action App

Tim Grover

6 Secrets to Feeling Satisfied in Your Relationship, Part 2 - EP092 Nov 10, 2020

Show notes

Conflict in relationships is unavoidable. The sign of a good relationship is not the absence of conflict but the ability to resolve disagreements as they come up.

So, what can you do to navigate conflict without tearing each other down? How do you cast a vision for a shared future that honors both partners' hopes and dreams?

On this episode of Destined to Be, we're sharing 3 more secrets to feeling satisfied in your relationship, discussing how to respect others even when you disagree and describing some of the things we do to demonstrate respect to ourselves and each other.

We challenge you to give up the need to be right, explaining why no one ever really wins an argument and how to empathize with someone who holds a very different point of view.

Listen in for insight on checking in with yourself first and then communicating your dreams and aspirations and learn how to create an intentional plan for achieving your individual and shared goals.

Key Takeaways

6 secrets to feeling satisfied in your relationship

Practice gratitude
Start with you
Be a great listener
Respect each other
Give up the need to be right
Check in + communicate

How to respect another person even if you disagree

Why we don't call each other out in public

What you can do to demonstrate respect to your partner

The link between self-respect and respect from others

Why nobody really ever wins an argument

How to empathize with someone you disagree with

Why you don't have to react when someone attacks

Why it's crucial to check in with yourself first

How to communicate expectations with your partner

Connect with Jeremiah & Mallory

REVOLUTION WELLNESS Facebook Group

Resources

Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus: The Classic Guide to Understanding the Opposite Sex by John Gray

Never Split the Difference: Negotiating as If Your Life Depended On It by Chris Voss and Tahl Raz

6 Secrets to Feeling Satisfied in Your Relationship, Part 1 on Destined to Be EP090

Coaching Your Squad to 'Touch the Line'—with Tanci Spencer - EP091 Nov 05, 2020

Show notes

We think that people don't want to be pushed. That they don't want to be called out when they're giving less than their best. But what if most people really DO want to be challenged? How do you coach a community to do MORE than they thought they were capable of—and celebrate each other along the way?

Tanci Spencer is the Founder and CEO of Turn Up, a dance fitness platform that helps women evolve unapologetically, dance ruthlessly and live out loud. More than a workout program, Turn Up is a movement of 1,000 women who empower each other to stop playing small and live the lives they desire. Tanci leverages her background as a college basketball player, high school teacher and coach to inspire her squad to push the limits they have set for themselves and step into their power.

On this episode of Destined to Be, Tanci joins us to discuss what inspired her to leave her marriage, quit her job as a teacher and coach, and move back to Michigan. She describes the Insta story that launched Turn Up, sharing the greatest challenges she's faced in building the community and the energy that comes from a group of women who celebrate each other. Listen in for Tanci's insight on coaching people to 'touch the line' and learn how YOU can be a part of the transformative Turn Up Squad!

Key Takeaways

Tanci's background as a college basketball player and how that role became her identity

How network marketing taught Tanci to be resourceful and question what she thought she wanted for her life

What inspired Tanci to leave her marriage, quit her job as a teacher/coach and move back to Michigan

Tanci's insight on how the chapter you're in now is preparing you for the next thing

The Instagram story that launched Turn Up Dance Fitness

The energy behind the Turn Up community and how the women celebrate each other

The poor decisions Tanci was making in college before she woke up to her greatness

Tanci's dedication to a consistent morning routine

How to call yourself out without beating yourself up

How being vulnerable on social has helped Tanci grow a squad of 1K women

The greatest challenges Tanci has faced in building Turn Up

Tanci's advice on coaching people to 'touch the line'

Why the best leaders are comfortable with making people uncomfortable and skilled in creating a safe environment where people can make mistakes

Connect with Tanci

Connect with Jeremiah & Mallory