Dear Son,

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Now is the Perfect Time to Fail | Ep 61 #fatherhood #vision #entrepreneurship #parenting Apr 13, 2023

Show notes

Enjoy the visual experience here: https://youtu.be/OdabzPxpVbY

Have you ever reflected on your life and experienced feelings of regret? Even in the mildest case, one typically spends at least a few moments traveling down the hypothetical road of 'what if.' If you haven't, then now is the perfect time to fail.

We had a candid conversation about the importance of embarking upon the unknown before life convinces that there's only one path to success (college... 40 years at a job...retire). It was all so simple when we were bachelors with no other dependents. If an idea sounded great (or just good enough), we'd take the leap of faith without a second thought. Then came family life, which is remarkable; however, many of us automatically suppress our dreams once we enter this phase. Why is that? More importantly, what are we teaching our children about the importance of pursuing their dreams? Lastly, for those who have abandoned their dreams, how do they explain that to the children?

At some point, the children will value what we do much more than what we say. Surely, we have their best interest in mind, and want them to believe that they can accomplish anything. That's a tough script to sell when our walk doesn't match our talk. We highly recommend that you consume the entire episode for the best results. Also, meet us in the comments or tag us with your opinion on social media via the links below. As always, we welcome your perspective. It takes a village.

#daddyissues #accountable #blackfathers #fatherandson #justicesystem #juveniles #consequences

Three tips for child entrepreneurs

1. Pursue your passion: As a child entrepreneur, it's essential to choose a venture that you are passionate about. This will help you stay motivated and focused, especially when faced with challenges.

2. Seek guidance and mentorship: As a young entrepreneur, it's crucial to seek guidance from experienced professionals in your field. They can offer insights and advice that can help you navigate the uncertainties of entrepreneurship.

3. Be resilient: Entrepreneurship can be challenging, and as a child entrepreneur, you may face unique obstacles. However, it's essential to persevere and remain resilient in the face of setbacks. Remember that failure is an opportunity to learn and grow.

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The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

1. Reveal trauma

2. Heal from trauma

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A MAN'S IDENTITY | A DSN SERIES | PT 1 OF 4 #manhood #vulnerability #purpose Apr 06, 2023

Show notes

Enjoy the visual experience here: https://youtu.be/rTMh5lTF82Y

The journey of manhood is layered. We are often called to be everything to everyone at the expense of knowing our purpose and identity. Some would argue that those concepts are interchangeable, and yes, they are similar; however, they are not the same.

In this series launch, we assembled 16 panelists, men from varying walks of life, to discuss what some might consider a very simply defined word, identity. We learned very quickly that while everyone understood the assignment, there wasn't necessarily one correct answer. Nerves aside, every panelist provided context with transparency to push the conversation forward. Each panelist (and event participant) left in a better condition than when they arrived.

We ate, we drank, and we celebrated each other. It was (and still is) powerful. I sincerely pray that this series is a blessing to you and your circle. Let it be a life prompt that facilitates necessary conversations with those you love. As always, I welcome your feedback and perspective. It takes a village.

Salute to Love's Luxe Event Styling and Della's Lunchbox for upgrading the environment. The space was styled beautifully, and the food was top tier. (links below).

https://instagram.com/loves_luxe

#fatherhood #healingjourney #accountable #blackfathers #fatherandson #blackexcellence #affirmation #confirmation #identity

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Let’s connect socially:

The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

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How Far Will You Go For Your Son | Ep 60 #fatherhood #abuse #enablers #parenting Apr 04, 2023

Show notes

Enjoy the visual experience: https://youtu.be/X_0mbUgt0HE

How far will you go for your son? Many parents proudly tout that they are willing to do anything for their children. The reality is that most of us will do anything (within reason) if our children are "representing the family correctly." What happens when they take on a moral compass that looks nothing like ours? While there are parents that will never turn their back on their children, most of us haven't been tested in a way that challenges that notion.

Imagine committing all your resources, energy, love and patience to another human, and that human does something extremely disturbing and disappointing in return. Perhaps the action wasn't to or at you, but how can a product of your environment represent you in such a way? The harsh reality is that the human experienced is nuanced, and even apples from the best trees can spoil. With that, do parents (and caregivers) have an obligation to protect their children from the consequences that the children have earned? Would you turn your child in after they committed a serious crime that injured someone (or worse)?

Sometimes growth requires that we remove the shield between what we want for our children and what they deserve. We highly recommend that you consume the entire episode for the best results. Also, meet us in the comments or tag us with your opinion on social media via the links below. As always, we welcome your perspective. It takes a village.

#daddyissues #accountable #blackfathers #fatherandson #justicesystem #juveniles #consequences

Three ways to help children deal with emotional pain:

1. Encourage communication: Encourage children to express their feelings and listen to them without judgment. This helps them feel heard and validated.

2. Teach coping skills: Teach children coping skills such as deep breathing, visualization, and positive self-talk. These techniques can help children manage their emotions in a healthy way.

3. Seek professional help: If emotional pain persists or becomes severe, seek professional help from a counselor or therapist. They can provide additional support and guidance for children and their families.

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The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

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Dear Son, Nice Guys Finish Last | Ep 59 #fatherhood #dating #courtship #chivalry Mar 23, 2023

Show notes

Watch the show here: https://youtu.be/P_u3jbFLUs4

What are we really teaching our sons about dating? Is this even a conversation anymore, or was it ever for that matter? Dear Son, nice guys finish last! That might be a myth but jerks certainly don’t win the race. Perhaps there’s a middle ground that will position our young men to mature into respectful companions for the right young lady.

We had a lively discussion about the importance of dating with clarity and intention. Our sons need to be aware of what’s acceptable, questionable, and absolutely off limits when it comes to courtship. They need to have standards when identifying attractive characteristics and qualities in the young ladies they pursue. Also, how much energy and effort should be invested into the pursuit? We agree that our young men must be respectable in all aspects as a baseline; however, we might have differing opinions on the appropriate level of “savagery or suckery”…you’ll just have to watch (or listen) to understand.

With all the questions posed above, you’ll find several answers throughout. We highly recommend that you consume the entire episode for the best results. Also, meet us in the comments or tag us with your opinion on social media via the links below. As always, we welcome your perspective. It takes a village.

#daddyissues #accountable #blackfathers #fatherandson #blackexcellence #theblackfamilyexperience #stressedout

Three dating tips for young men:

1. Be yourself and be confident in who you are. Don't try to be someone you're not to impress someone else.

2. Listen actively to your date and show genuine interest in them. This means putting away your phone and giving them your full attention.

3. Be respectful and considerate towards your date. This includes things like being on time, dressing appropriately, and being mindful of their boundaries.

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I'm About to Pop | Ep 58 #fatherhood #stressed #breakingpoint Mar 17, 2023

Show notes

This episode is just as the title implies. Am I about to pop? Every man (that I know) has come face-to-face with an ‘about to pop’ moment at some stage of life. For some of us, this is a mile marker at every phase, from adolescence to the elderly years. While seemingly inevitable, the more important part is how we show up in those moments.

Losing a source of income, losing a relationship, losing health, or perhaps even losing a family member can trigger anxiety, feelings of inferiority, and uncertainty. Conversely, those ‘about to pop’ moments can cause the loss of the things and relationships mentioned above. Adversity introduces a man to himself, and some men don’t like that version of themselves. Life comes at us fast, and often without warning. Are you (or the men in your life) battle tested and prepared for these moments?

We highly recommend that you consume the entire episode for the best results. Also, meet us in the comments or tag us with your opinion on social media via the links below. As always, we welcome your perspective. It takes a village.

#daddyissues #accountable #blackfathers #fatherandson #blackexcellence #theblackfamilyexperience #stressedout

Three tips to help men manage stress:

1. Exercise regularly: Physical activity can help reduce stress and improve overall wellbeing.

2. Practice relaxation techniques: Deep breathing, meditation, and yoga can help calm the mind and reduce stress levels.

3. Seek support: Talking to trusted friends, family members, or a mental health professional can help in managing stress and improving mental health.

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The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

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Don't Shoot the Messenger | Ep 57 #fatherhood #childish Mar 03, 2023

Show notes

Enjoy the visual experience: https://youtu.be/hq9P3qQ93eo

How often do you reject a message simply because it was coming from a source that you don’t like? Whether the source is a person, place, or thing, you just don’t like it and, consequently, will not accept anything it has to offer, even if it could improve your life. Don’t shoot the messenger!

Sometimes there is a valid reason to disregard information being offered to you. Other times, you might just be missing out on information that can change the trajectory of your family’s future. There are those that complain about not having the information that they choose not to access. Where do we draw the line between excuses and maturity?

Now consider if you’ve been the source of information that people reject because of your character, behavior, beliefs, etc. Perhaps those in your community or church, at your job, or even in your home feel this way about you. How would you adjust if they told you this was so? For some, this would be a tough truth to accept while others would embrace the opportunity to grow and change.

#daddyissues #accountable #blackfathers #fatherandson #blackexcellence #theblackfamilyexperience #Mali #ghana #tanzania #malawi #bahamas

Three tips to become a better listener.

1. Make sure to give the speaker your full attention. Don't let yourself get distracted by external factors. Make eye contact and stay focused.

2. Don't interrupt the speaker, even if you feel an urge to do so. Allow them to finish what they're saying before you respond.

3. Listen actively by repeating back the main points that the speaker is making. This will show the speaker that you are really paying attention and want to understand them better.

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Don't Disregard the Disregard | Ep 56 w/James Johnson #fatherhood #masculine #thoughtleader Feb 23, 2023

Show notes

Enjoy the visual experience: https://youtu.be/udmv7aIX9Sc

It’s a safe assumption that nobody likes to feel disregarded. Unfortunately, many of us have or will experience this in various phases of life. As a child, perhaps a classmate shared his candy with everyone in the class except you. Maybe as a teenager, the girl of your dreams rejected your invite to homecoming and laughed it off with her friends. Over time, we essentially become numb to it, or at least we put up a good front as if being disregarded doesn’t bother us. Don’t disregard the disregard.

In this episode we address how being disregarded is viewed through the lens of fatherhood. This isn’t a grip session by any stretch, but rather an ‘aha’ moment of sorts when realize that we can be guilt of disregarding what’s important to our children. Many of us have shewed a child away while on a work call, preparing dinner, or watching something meaningless on tv. I’d also bet that many of us experienced that as a child as well. So…is it just our turn to be the givers in this cycle of carelessness?

The ends don’t always justify the means. We shouldn’t take for granted that our children will simply get over things in time. Be mindful that our journey of “just getting over a hurt” may have taken months, years, or even decades. Let’s not try to condense the healing process for our children as a careless convenience. We don’t want them to arrive at adulthood as masters of disregarding the disregard. How does this play out in your home?

#daddyissues #accountable #blackfathers #fatherandson #blackexcellence #theblackfamilyexperience #Mali #ghana #tanzania #malawi #bahamas

Three tips to ensure your children feel heard:

1. Make sure to set aside undisturbed time each day to talk to your children. This helps them feel like you are truly listening to them and hearing their needs.

2. Ask open-ended questions that encourage your children to think and express themselves. This will help you understand their perspective and make them feel like their opinions are valued.

3. Show your children that you are listening by giving them your full attention. Make eye contact, take time to think before responding, and avoid distractions like cell phones or television. This will make them feel like their thoughts and feelings are being taken seriously.

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The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

1. Reveal trauma

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3. Help through telling stories of it all

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Dad Goals | DSP Ep 55 w/ James Johnson #fatherhood #dadgoals #bettermen #betterfathers Feb 17, 2023

Show notes

Enjoy the visual experience: https://youtu.be/UrSR_iiDdQY

It seems like everyone is looking for some kind of “goal” to help define personal success. Relationship goals, marriage goals, mom goals are popular hash tags across many social media platforms, but what about dad goals? Do men publicly proclaim that they admire how other men parent, or does ego limit those feelings to internal conversations? Manhood is tricky…well at least some of us make it harder than it should be.

In this episode we have a transparent conversation about the top three focus areas for our families in 2023. Notice that I didn’t use the term “goals,” and that was quite intentional. It is easy to get caught up in identifying resolutions in alignment with the turn of the calendar year, but do they really yield meaningful results? In my opinion most resolutions are glorified checklists of things that are easily and objectively measured (i.e., weight loss, exercise habits, saving money, etc.). How we parent is not so cut and dry.

Our lists are not presented as one size fits all as even our priorities differed. As with any other content offered on this platform, we believe this dialogue provides meaningful life prompts to promote the conversation in your home, neighborhood, and even the broader global community. Take some time to assess how you’re leading your family, and jot down a couple of areas that need improvement. Be mindful that the length of your list doesn’t equate to failure. Personally, I believe anyone that struggles to identify at least three areas for improvement is probably delusional about how great of a job they’re doing.

#fatherhood #daddyissues #accountable #blackfathers #fatherandson #blackexcellence

Consider these three areas of focus to get the ball rolling:

Communication: Fathers should strive to communicate better with their children. This includes actively listening to their kids and engaging in meaningful conversations about their thoughts, feelings, and experiences.
Quality Time: Fathers should make time for quality bonding experiences with their children. This could include playing games, going on walks, or engaging in other activities that allow them to spend quality time together and foster a strong bond.
Empathy: Fathers should strive to show empathy and understanding to their children. This means being willing to take their feelings and perspectives into account when making decisions or addressing issues.

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The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

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You Ain't The Man of Nothing | DSP Ep 54 w/ James Johnson #fatherhood #raisingmen #boys2men Feb 11, 2023

Show notes

Dear Son, you ain't the man of nothing! How often do young boys get thrusted into adulthood way before their time? There's an array of circumstances to blame, and many are plausible. Unfortunately, telling a boy he is a man, or worse, treating a boy as a man before his time can yield very damaging results.

In this episode, we have a transparent conversation about the dangers of levying the weight of manhood on a young boy. Now there's no specific age guidelines, and there are exceptionally mature young boys in this world, but expecting one to be the man of the house too soon is dangerous. We explore the challenges that come with the responsibilities of manhood when a man (adult) wasn't properly prepared. Considering those challenges, we had to evaluate how the situations occur, who is responsible for the development of a man, and what are the reasonable expectations of women as it pertains to grooming responsible, accountable, and emotionally intelligent men.

#fatherhood #daddyissues #accountable #blackfathers #fatherandson #blackexcellence

Three tips to help children deal with peer pressure

1. Talk to a trusted adult - Having a supportive and understanding adult to talk to can help children find the strength and courage to stand up to peer pressure.

2. Practice saying no - Role playing with a trusted adult can help children practice responding to peer pressure in a confident and assertive way.

3. Spend time with supportive friends - Spending time with friends who share similar values and beliefs can help children stay away from negative peer pressure. Encourage your child to make friends with peers who can be a positive influence.

#fatherhood #daddyissues #accountable #blackfathers #fatherandson #blackexcellence

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