Cultivating H.E.R. Space: Uplifting Conversations for the Black Woman

Latest Episodes:

S23E6: Unpacking Pretty Privilege: Examining How We Perceive and Respond to Attractiveness Aug 09, 2024

Show notes

Hey lady! We know you know you’re a baddie, but do you really know the power you hold? Pretty privilege is often discussed on social media as an ideal, but it’s an actual concept with real consequences – good or bad.
Pretty privilege is the notion that society favors people based on if and how they are perceived as conventionally attractive. Often, it can result in extra favors or treats because of your beauty, but sometimes the implication of extra favor for attractiveness can make for uncomfortable situations. After all, we want to be valued for our worthiness and merit over beauty, but being appreciated for having that je ne sais quoi doesn’t hurt either.
Terri and Dr. Dom sit down and talk about when they first realized they were beautiful, ways that they’ve experienced pretty privilege, and how they’ve maintained control in their experience of it. They offer some reflection questions for you to dive deep into your own experience of it so that you can anchor why your level of hotness is top tier no matter what anyone says!
Remember lady, true beauty does, indeed, start within. So, hold your head up high and strut through life like the Goddess you are!
Quote of the Day:
"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder."
Wisdom Wednesdays with Terri
Cultivating H.E.R. Space Sanctuary
Resources:
Dr. Dom’s Therapy Practice
Branding with Terri
Melanin and Mental Health
Therapy for Black Girls
Psychology Today
Therapy for QPOC
Where to find us:
Twitter: @HERspacepodcast
Instagram: @herspacepodcast
Facebook: @herspacepodcast
Website: cultivatingherspace.com
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/cultivating-h-e-r-space-uplifting-conversations-for-the-black-woman--5470036/support.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

S23E5: If We Can't Beat AI, Should We Join It?: How to Use Technology and AI to Simplify Your Life Aug 02, 2024

Show notes

Hey lady! Are you ready to step in the future? Well, even if you are not the future is here.
Artificial Intelligence, once only imagined in sci-fi movies, is now a part of daily life. Whether it’s speaking into Siri for basic information or prompting ChatGPT to write your emails and official communications, AI is here and it looks like it is here to stay.
So, is this a good thing? Dr. Dom and Terri explore their apprehensions about the technology and offer a few perspectives on the evolution of technology from the analog days until now where technology drives innovation. Still, questions linger about job security, privacy concerns, and keeping the use of data ethical.
Lady, this is going to be an ongoing conversation and we want to hear from you about your stance on AI! Find us on Instagram and let us know are you ready for the technological revolution or does the idea of AI make you feel uneasy?
Quote of the Day:
"AI is not about man versus machine, but rather man with machine, complementing our strengths and compensating for our weaknesses." -ChatGPT
Wisdom Wednesdays with Terri
Cultivating H.E.R. Space Sanctuary
Resources:
Dr. Dom’s Therapy Practice
Branding with Terri
Melanin and Mental Health
Therapy for Black Girls
Psychology Today
Therapy for QPOC
Where to find us:
Twitter: @HERspacepodcast
Instagram: @herspacepodcast
Facebook: @herspacepodcast
Website: cultivatingherspace.com
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/cultivating-h-e-r-space-uplifting-conversations-for-the-black-woman--5470036/support.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

S23E4: Healing Church Hurt: Creating Safe Spaces for Black Queer Communities with Second Sunday Jul 26, 2024

Show notes

Hey lady! Are you ready to expand your perspective? This week Terri and Dr. Dom welcome Esther Ikoro and Darren Calhoun, hosts of the podcast Second Sunday, an Ambie-nominated podcast about Black queer people finding, keeping, and sometimes losing faith in the Black church. The hosts gather to dive deep into all of the issues that Queer folk have as they navigate their relationship with faith, religion, and building community. Esther and Darren tackle nuanced conversations with depth and skill while also managing to keep it fun and sexy. Not sure what we mean by that? You’ll have to wait until the OhYouBlatchet! segment to find out.
The two hosts offer strategies for overcoming church hurt, insight as to why finding community in church is as important an issue as ever, and possible solutions on how churches can energize their offerings to attract a younger crowd. Can we get an Amen? Tap in and find out how you can grow your faith community or support someone who is looking to find more like-hearted people with whom to fellowship!
Quote of the Day:
"The saints ain't ready for this...but we're still gonna talk about it."
– Second Sunday
Where to find Second Sunday:
Podcast: Second Sunday
Instagram: @secondsundaypod
Instagram: @estheralready
Instagram: @heydarren
Wisdom Wednesdays with Terri
Cultivating H.E.R. Space Sanctuary
Resources:
Dr. Dom’s Therapy Practice
Branding with Terri
Melanin and Mental Health
Therapy for Black Girls
Psychology Today
Therapy for QPOC
Where to find us:
Twitter: @HERspacepodcast
Instagram: @herspacepodcast
Facebook: @herspacepodcast
Website: cultivatingherspace.com
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/cultivating-h-e-r-space-uplifting-conversations-for-the-black-woman--5470036/support.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

S23E3: Commonly Misused Psychology Words and What to Use Instead Jul 19, 2024

Show notes

Hey lady! Have you ever been gaslit and traumatized by a toxic, narcissistic so-and-so who abused your trust, violated your boundaries, and caused you to doubt yourself? Does that sentence trigger you? Well, if it does then tune in to this week’s episode so Dr. Dom and Terri can help take the sting out of those words and give you the context around what certain terms mean so you can accurately assess and process events in your life.
The Internet is a wonderful tool, but certain words and phrases can catch on and become buzzy and slowly their meaning can become distorted. This week, Terri and Dr. Dom identify terms that are trendy and provide accurate definitions and examples so that you don’t confuse lovebombing with something more benign. And, if you want to dive deeper into some of these concepts check out these previous episodes:
✓ S10E2: Is Your Partner a Narcissist? Diving into Dr. Ramani Durvasula's Narcissism Quiz
✓ S10E3: How to Finally Leave Your Narcissistic Partner with Dr. Ramani Durvasula
✓ S11E1: Getting Back to Dating After a Toxic Relationship
✓ S17E3: What Gaslighting, Red Flags, and, Manipulation Sound Like
✓ S17E4: How to Stand Your Ground and Hold Gaslighters Accountable
✓ S23E1: Trauma Bonding: Protecting Yourself From Unhealthy Relationships
Words to Use Instead:
1. Gaslighting→ Manipulating, lying
2. Toxic→ Unhealthy, difficult
3. Traumatized→ Upset, embarrassed
4. Triggered→ Activated, reminded
5. Narcissist→ Selfish, self-centered
6. Boundaries → Limit, rule, guideline
Quote of the Day:
“Language is the road map of a culture. It tells you where its people come from and where they are going.”
– Rita Mae Brown
Wisdom Wednesdays with Terri
Cultivating H.E.R. Space Sanctuary
Resources:
Dr. Dom’s Therapy Practice
Branding with Terri
Melanin and Mental Health
Therapy for Black Girls
Psychology Today
Therapy for QPOC
Where to find us:
Twitter:

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

S23E2: Reclaiming Our Time with Ashley Menzies Babatunde Jul 12, 2024

Show notes

Hey lady! Doesn’t it seem like 2024 took off in a full sprint? This year has moved rather quickly, which is why this week Terri and Dr. Dom invite Ashley Menzies Babatunde, host of the No Straight Path podcast, to discuss the power of the pause, and why honoring the moments when life slows you down can be your biggest asset and opportunity to find and strengthen your authentic self. Ashley shares her inspirational story of advocating for herself after a major life event showed her the beauty in her present, albeit difficult, circumstance so that she could create a life rich with meaning. Her decision to embrace where her life took her next with curiosity and wonder opened possibilities that were better than she could have imagined. Join Dr. Dom and Terri for a motivating conversation about finding the blessings and beauty in your life stage.
Quote of the Day:
"The pauses in life taught me how to live." – Ashley Menzies Babatunde
Where to find Ashley Menzies Babatunde:
Website: ashleymenzies.com
Podcast: No Straight Path
Instagram: @ms_menzies
Instagram: @no_straight_path
LinkedIn: Ashley Menzies
Wisdom Wednesdays with Terri
Cultivating H.E.R. Space Sanctuary
Resources:
Dr. Dom’s Therapy Practice
Branding with Terri Melanin and Mental Health
Therapy for Black Girls
Psychology Today
Therapy for QPOC
Where to find us: Twitter: @HERspacepodcast
Instagram: @herspacepodcast
Facebook: @herspacepodcast
Website: cultivatingherspace.com
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/cultivating-h-e-r-space-uplifting-conversations-for-the-black-woman--5470036/support.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

S23E1: Trauma Bonding: Protecting Yourself From Unhealthy Relationships Jul 05, 2024

Show notes

Hey lady! This week, Dr. Dom and Terri step in their bag and talk about the tender topic of trauma bonding and why it can cause serious harm to you if you let it go unchecked. What is trauma bonding? Social media has a way of amplifying new trends and concepts, but sometimes those new concepts are buzzy but inaccurate. Dr. Dom and Terri delve into what trauma bonding actually is so that you have a framework of how to navigate situations where the potential for harm is high. Break out your Cultivating H.E.R. Space journal, located in the Cultivating H.E.R. Space shop, and create a safe space for you to identify the areas where you can heal so that those who aim to trauma bond with you have nowhere to hook into you. And, remember take care and go at a pace that feels supportive while you listen – we love you, lady!
Quote of the Day:
"Our virtues are wrapped inside of our limitations. It is only when we are in close proximity to others that we begin to intimately explore the boundaries of our virtues by slamming into our limitations."
– Resmaa Menakem
Wisdom Wednesdays with Terri
Cultivating H.E.R. Space Sanctuary
Resources:
Dr. Dom’s Therapy Practice Branding with Terri
Melanin and Mental Health
Therapy for Black Girls
Psychology Today
Therapy for QPOC
Where to find us:
Twitter: @HERspacepodcast
Instagram: @herspacepodcast
Facebook: @herspacepodcast
Website: cultivatingherspace.com
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/cultivating-h-e-r-space-uplifting-conversations-for-the-black-woman--5470036/support.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

S22E13: You Are What You Attract: Aligning Your Beliefs with Your Desired Reality Jun 28, 2024

Show notes

Hey lady! Have you ever heard the saying you are who you say you are? Well, this week Terri and Dr. Dom dive deep into the power of our thoughts and what we say and why having a healthy relationship with both is the key to living the life of your wildest dreams. Dr. Dom and Terri have tips on how to get to the root of what’s blocking you from living your most fulfilled life. Rewiring your brain through positive self-talk is a major undertaking, but the reward is a clear vision of who you are authentically and worth the work involved. Grab your Cultivating H.E.R. Space journal and join in this interactive episode. Tap in with us on Instagram and let us know how you're doing the work to manifest your best life!
Techniques to Change Beliefs
1. Cognitive restructuring: Identifying negative thoughts, challenging their validity, and replacing them with positive, realistic thoughts.
2. Affirmations and positive self-talk: Affirmations are powerful in reprogramming the subconscious mind and provide examples of effective affirmations.
3. Visualization and mental rehearsal: Visualizing desired outcomes can reinforce new beliefs and increase motivation.
Practical Tips and Exercises: Daily practices to reinforce new, empowering beliefs
1. Start each day with positive affirmations.
2. Keep a gratitude journal to focus on positive aspects of life.
3. Surround yourself with supportive and positive influences.
4. Practice patience and be persistent as changing deeply held beliefs takes time and effort.
Quote of the Day:
“Life is about the management of energy, where you place your attention, is where you place your energy."
– Dr. Joe Dispenza
Wisdom Wednesdays with Terri
Cultivating H.E.R. Space Sanctuary
Resources:
Dr. Dom’s Therapy Practice
Branding with Terri
Melanin and Mental Health
Therapy for Black Girls
Psychology Today
Therapy for QPOC
Where to find us:
Twitter: @HERspacepodcast
Instagram: @herspacepodcast
Facebook: @herspacepodcast
Website: cultivatingherspace.com
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/cultivating-h-e-r-space-uplifting-conversations-for-the-black-woman--5470036/support.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

S22E12: Never Have I Ever: 6 Powerful Insights for Decision-Making Jun 21, 2024

Show notes

Hey lady! This week it’s game time! That’s right, this week Dr. Dom and Terri play the classic game “Never Have I Ever” as a way to discuss their decision-making processes and how they keep a growth mindset in their self-development toolbelt. Life is full of lessons and can be a beautiful adventure if you allow yourself to apply them. So, how are you adding dimension and color to your story? And, how can you expand your point-of-view in a way that removes judgment and expands your capacity to have a psychologically rich experience?
Terri and Dr. Dom offer powerful insights for increasing your ability to make solid decisions, but they spill hot tea in the Aftershow about where some of those decisions have taken them. Check them out on Patreon!
1. Embrace New Experiences
"Never have I ever" moments often highlight things we've never tried. Step out of your comfort zones and try new activities.
Lesson: Life is enriched by new experiences. Don’t be afraid to try something new, even if it seems daunting at first.
2. Learn from Missed Opportunities
Reflect on things you haven’t done and consider why. Was it fear, lack of opportunity, or something else?
Lesson: Understanding the reasons behind your "never" moments can provide insight and help you overcome barriers in the future.
3. Value of Shared Experiences
Sharing “Never Have I Ever” stories can foster connections and understanding. It can be surprising to see how much you have in common with others.
Lesson: Shared experiences, even those you haven't had yet, can bring people together and create a sense of community.
4. Growth Through Challenges
Identify times when trying something new led to personal growth or overcoming a challenge.
Lesson: Challenging yourself to try new things, even if they’re outside your comfort zone, can lead to significant personal growth.
5. Appreciate Individual Journeys
Everyone's list of "Never Have I Ever" will be different. Appreciate and respect each person's unique journey.
Lesson: Everyone’s life path is unique, and that's what makes our stories rich and diverse.
6. Reflect on the Past, Plan for the Future
Reflect on things you’ve never done and consider making a list of things you’d like to try in the future.
Lesson: Reflecting on the past can help set meaningful goals for the future.
Quote of the Day:
"I don't have to be perfect. All I have to do is show up and enjoy the messy, imperfect, and beautiful journey of my life."
— Kerry Washington
Wisdom Wednesdays with Terri
Cultivating H.E.R. Space Sanctuary
Resources:
Dr. Dom’s Therapy Practice
Branding with Terri
Melanin and Mental Health
Therapy for Black Girls
Psychology Today
Therapy for QPOC
Where to find us:
Twitter: @HERspacepodcast

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

S22E11: A Fresh Perspective on the 5 Love Languages Jun 14, 2024

Show notes

Hey lady! Do you know what your love language is? You know, the behaviors and actions that make you feel heard, seen, and understood? This week, Terri and Dr. Dom delve into the popular book by Gary Chapman to discuss how they express love and receive love; and what these concepts mean in modern-day relationships.
The dynamic duo explore their quiz results and compares those results to when they initially took the quiz to measure their growth as people. They also reflect on how knowing their love languages and any changes over time help them navigate their relationships. Understanding your love language can be useful in how you show up for others and most importantly how you show up for yourself. In this episode, Dr. Dom and Terri share their insights on the nuances that can help you amplify how you love your partner, your friendships, and your most important relationship – the one with yourself! They also offer strategies to help you communicate how you feel loved to those most important to you. Tap in!
Quote of the Day:
"Love makes your soul crawl out from its hiding place"
— Zora Neale Hurston
Wisdom Wednesdays with Terri
Cultivating H.E.R. Space Sanctuary
Resources:
Dr. Dom’s Therapy Practice
Branding with Terri
Melanin and Mental Health
Therapy for Black Girls
Psychology Today
Therapy for QPOC
Where to find us:
Twitter: @HERspacepodcast
Instagram: @herspacepodcast
Facebook: @herspacepodcast
Website: cultivatingherspace.com
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/cultivating-h-e-r-space-uplifting-conversations-for-the-black-woman--5470036/support.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

S22E10: Literacy Matters with Byron Dean Tolson Jun 07, 2024

Show notes

Lady! This week Dr. Dom and Terri shine some light on an important topic that impacts our society. Byron Dean Tolson is a former NBA player with an inspiring story of overcoming odds and never giving up on your dreams. Dean shares his journey of leaving the only career he knew with a significant deficit. At the age of 32-years-old, he still could not read.
Illiteracy is a nationwide problem that handicaps the quality of life for the nearly 1 in 4 Americans who live with the condition. This timely episode explores the importance of literacy, how you can increase your desire to become more literate, and how you can help the young people in your life develop a lifelong love of learning! Tune in for some impactful tips to help you become more informed and think critically about the world you live in. Knowledge is power so tune in today’s episode!
Quote of the Day:
"You only fail if you quit and give up."
– Dean Tolson
Where to find Dean Tolson:
Website: Dean Tolson
Book: Power Forward
Instagram: @dean_tolson
Twitter: @dean_tolson
Facebook: Dean Tolson
Wisdom Wednesdays with Terri
Cultivating H.E.R. Space Sanctuary
Resources:
Dr. Dom’s Therapy Practice
Branding with Terri
Melanin and Mental Health
Therapy for Black Girls
Psychology Today
Therapy for QPOC
Where to find us:
Twitter: @HERspacepodcast
Instagram: @herspacepodcast
Facebook: @herspacepodcast
Website: cultivatingherspace.com
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/cultivating-h-e-r-space-uplifting-conversations-for-the-black-woman--5470036/support.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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