Crooked Butterfly Podcast

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It's Easier to Keep Up, than Catch Up May 15, 2019

Show notes

On a physical sense this is pretty obvious. The expenditure to catch back up to something after you've fallen behind is greater than it would have been to just put the little extra effort in to keeping up in the first place. This is only then exacerbated by age, time, increased life demands or responsibilities...
The parallel into the psychological sense is pretty tight. Once we start falling behind, if there is a desire to catch up, we start to look for short cuts and call them "efficiencies". If there is less desire than there is need, we begin to rationalize not putting in the extra effort at all. In both cases we lose.
I believe that the tide of influence is stronger flooding from physical habits into psychological patterns than the ebbing from psychological to physical.

Being Consistent & Lessons from a Bad Day May 08, 2019

Show notes

We start out with a discussion on a recent IG post I hung about Consistency. How only a small slice of the concept, the paradigm slice maybe, is precise routine. If this is the only appreciation we have for the concept we likely fail and get disappointed, thrown off track, and require large amounts of inertia to regain momentum. But consistency is relative on a slider from a macro to micro scale.
There were a few tangents this week - from Mountain Lions to Being Gentle with oneself.
We somehow miraculously arrive at the instigating conversation I wanted to share; about a Bad Day target shooting and how I'm trying to convince myself that calling timeout wasn't quitting.

Stereotypes, Profiling, and An Eye for Inconsistency May 01, 2019

Show notes

I find myself, at times, going down a path of reacting on assumptions or passing judgment that I'm not particularly proud of. Not that it isn't natural or normal, to a degree, but that I don't want it to digress any further than a simple reaction or initial starting point to confirm or deny. Ideally, working me back away from being 'ugly'.
When I land navigate and find myself creeping into uncertainty or disorientation I like to tackle the map solution with "Why am I not where I think I am?" vs "I must be right here because x, y, z." This process seems to be a wonderful tool when I catch myself inventing, assuming, or even analyzing life.

Why the High Road? Apr 24, 2019

Show notes

It's been constantly coming up for me lately to question why. Why am I working so hard to be self aware, to have a consciousness, to strive to be good, better.
It seems like everywhere you look there are people taking short cuts, taking the road less high, leaving little room for the consideration of others, etc... and they seem to get further, farther, faster just fine.
I'm not sure I have resolved anything or that it is a question that even gets run full circle to ground. Kinda like the meaning of life. So what why. But the fact that you can have the discussion and go somewhere with an answer that satisfies continuing forward in the goodest possible manner, well, that might be all there is. That is exactly where I'm at with it right now and sharing what hits satisfactory for me this week.

Playing Dumb as a Strategy Apr 17, 2019

Show notes

It started out as a strategy for a few different purposes somewhere in my career. It was a way to identify people who didn't respect you, were full of shit, or would take advantage of you. It was a chess move of sorts to unfold as an ambush down the road. Or, it was also a way of not being received as the no-it-all or be that annoying person who was always one upping.
Somewhere it habituated into a normal pattern of behavior; likely reinforced with other character traits and personalities, where people tend to not take you too seriously or truly value certain competencies.
Now, it feels like a bit more of an uphill battle breaking through an image or perception that I've built. Or, maybe it's just in my head. Most probably both at varying degrees from audience to audience.

Don't let your Mood have Majority Vote Apr 10, 2019

Show notes

This is just another way of saying don't be an emotional based decision maker, don't be impulsive, or think about what you are doing / not doing. For me, phrasing it this way simply invites engaging about what it means to not allow a transitory feeling or emotion to rule on my actions.
I start to introduce the power of feedback mechanisms and discipline. When we give in to mood we have an often temporary high followed with a low of sorts. [ It doesn't always have to be the pleasure & guilt dynamic. ] What happens is the decision to arrive at the immediate high receives the connection to a response from mood and the further down the road low just gets labeled as a new mood that needs to be placated. The opposite is true where discipline to do an uncomfortable thing now yields a down the road high where if we can remember to associate that feeling of high as a reward to the decision to deny comfort (in this example) we can modify behavior and decisions.

Strong Opinions & Loud Voices Apr 03, 2019

Show notes

After getting fired up by a comment and response thread on the IG this week, I spent a few days engaged with frustration, grumpiness, and thoughts regarding the relationship / indicators of inexperience w/ opinion & ignorance w/ the loud voice.
Ultimately it came full circle on a reflection of myself and resisting to pass judgment or make assumptions. The timeliness of a thing I saw "Carry yourself with the confidence of a mediocre white man" couldn't have been more positioned.
"Look at yourself now from five to ten years down the road" Will you be impressed?

Reflections from GodZone Mar 27, 2019

Show notes

I recently returned from participating in the GodZone Adventure Race in South New Zealand and wanted to share a couple of pull outs from the experience. These ultra endurance tests inevitably provide tiny (sometimes not so tiny) snapshots of character that I'm fascinated with. While I'm not always proud of some of these selfies, I get a glimpse of myself and they provide incredible opportunities for self awareness and growth.

A ramble on Learning & Growth? Mar 20, 2019

Show notes

As this episode publishes I am finishing up (if all went well) and traveling home from GodZone in New Zealand.
This episode starts out discussing After Action Reports and meanders through Iterative Learning, Shared Common Experiences, Meaning Making, Reframing and Opportunities for Growth.
I'd love to dissect these all a little more in future recordings and looking forward to feedback if anything is of interest.

Adventure / Ultra Endurance Racing Mar 13, 2019

Show notes

I'm pre-recording and cutting in a conversation I shared with Jon Kinnick & Moe Naqvi from CrossFit Beyond the WhiteBoard about some struggles and failures I've had during a handful of events.
It seemed fitting as when this episode releases I'll be 3+ days into GodZone, a 600km Adventure Race in New Zealand.

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