Coaching for Leaders

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311: Negotiation Tactics for Results, with Kwame Christian Aug 21, 2017

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Kwame Christian: Negotiate Anything Kwame Christian is a business lawyer and the Director of the American Negotiation Institute. His TEDx Talk, Finding Confidence in Conflict, was the most popular TED Talk on the topic of conflict of 2017. Today, he’s working extensively with procurement departments within companies to help them make better deals. Kwame hosts the top negotiation podcast, Negotiate Anything and is the author of the book Finding Confidence in Conflict: How to Negotiate Anything and Live Your Best Life*. Questions Margaret asked about how to respond to people when they are asking for a pay raise. Kim asked about how to encourage an employee to leave the company. Vivian asked about how to handle a situation where an employee isn’t performing but who has a close relationship with a more senior leader. Roger asked what wisdom we’d give to leaders on handling tough negotiation situations. Resources Mentioned Download Kwame’s Free Guide Finding Confidence in Conflict: How to Negotiate Anything and Live Your Best Life* by Kwame Christian Getting to Yes* by Roger Fisher and William L. Ury Five Steps to Hold People Accountable with Jonathan Raymond (episode 306) How to Win Friends and Influence People* by Dale Carnegie Related Episodes How to Listen When Someone Is Venting, with Mark Goulston (episode 91) Negotiating As If Your Life Depended On It, with Chris Voss (episode 262) How to Benefit From Conflict, with Susan Gerke (episode 263) Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

310: How to Reduce Drama With Kids, with Tina Payne Bryson Aug 14, 2017

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Tina Payne Bryson: No Drama Discipline Tina Payne Bryson is the co-author, with Dan Siegel, of two New York Times bestsellers, The Whole Brain Child* and No Drama Discipline* — each of which has been translated into over twenty languages. She is a psychotherapist and the Executive Director of The Center for Connection in Pasadena, California, where she offers parenting consultations and provides therapy to children and adolescents. Key Points Much of what we do in the name of discipline is counter-productive. The original meaning of the word “discipline” is to teach. To effectively discipline (to teach kids skills to do better in the future), children have to be in a state of mind in which they can learn. Consequences can be counter-productive. If you’re being an effective disciplinarian, you should be disciplining less over time. “Time-outs” don’t teach kids anything, but taking the time to step away from the situation to talk to your kids does teach. Resources Mentioned No-Drama Discipline: The Whole-Brain Way to Calm the Chaos and Nurture Your Child's Developing Mind* by Daniel Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson The Whole-Brain Child: 12 Revolutionary Strategies to Nurture Your Child's Developing Mind* by Daniel Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson The Yes Brain: How to Cultivate Courage, Curiosity, and Resilience in Your Child* by Daniel Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson Tina Payne Bryson's website Book Notes Download my highlights from No Drama Discipline in PDF format (free membership required). Related Episodes Five Leadership Lessons Learned from Luke (episode 50) How to Improve Your Coaching Skills with Tom Henschel (episode 190) The Way to Stop Rescuing People From Their Problems, with Michael Bungay Stanier (episode 284) Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

309: How to Help Followers Lead, with Bonni Stachowiak Aug 07, 2017

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Bonni Stachowiak: Teaching in Higher Ed Bonni Stachowiak is the host of the Teaching in Higher Ed podcast, a professor of business and management at Vanguard University, and my life partner. Prior to her academic career, Bonni was a human resources consultant and executive officer for a publicly traded company. She is the author of The Productive Online and Offline Professor: A Practical Guide. Listener Questions Michael asked about what you do when you have a follower who has leadership potential but is reluctant to step into leadership shoes. Steve asked for suggestions on how to get communication out to a team when email isn’t an option. Michal asked about transitioning military leadership experience to a position in the private sector. Ricard asked about the discomfort of feeling like you don’t know it all when you’re new in a role. Resources Mentioned Radical Candor* by Kim Scott The Servant as Leader* by by Robert Greenleaf Scaling Up : How a Few Companies Make It … and Why the Rest Don't* by Verne Harnish The 4 Disciplines of Execution* by Chris McChesney, Sean Covey, and Jim Huling Past Coaching for Leaders episodes on feedback Turn the Ship Around!* by David Marquet How to Write a KILLER LinkedIn Profile … And 18 Mistakes to Avoid* by Brenda Bernstein Related Episodes The Power Of Servant Leadership, with John Dickson (episode 137) Where To Start With Succession Planning, with Bill Bliss (episode 153) The Way to Turn Followers Into Leaders, with David Marquet (episode 241) How to Support Veterans in Your Workplace, with Eugenia Weiss (episode 280) How to Write a Killer LinkedIn Profile, with Brenda Bernstein (episode 285) Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

308: The Power of Solitude, with Mike Erwin Jul 31, 2017

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Mike Erwin: Lead Yourself First Mike Erwin is the CEO of the Character & Leadership Center and the Founder and President of The Positivity Project, a non-profit organization with the mission to help America’s youth build stronger relationships by recognizing the character strengths in themselves and others. He is the co-author of the book Lead Yourself First: Inspiring Leadership Through Solitude*. Key Points Solitude helps both in intense thinking and also in giving the brain a chance to quiet down. It’s hard to think intensively with a lot going on around you. Even extroverts can benefit from solitude. Start small. Just find a few minutes throughout the day to build a habit of solitude. Social media and solitude can coexist. The four ways solitude benefits leaders: Clarity Creativity Moral Courage Emotional Balance Resources Mentioned Lead Yourself First: Inspiring Leadership Through Solitude* by Raymond M. Kethledge and Mike Erwin The Character & Leadership Center Team Red, White, & Blue The Positivity Project Activate Your Free Coaching for Leaders Membership Get immediate access to my free, 10-day audio course, 10 Ways to Empower the People You Lead. Give me 10 minutes a day for 10 days to get the most immediate, practical actions to become a better leader. Join at CoachingforLeaders.com. Related Episodes CFL184: Getting Things Done with David Allen CFL196: Marshall Goldsmith on Triggers: Creating Behavior That Lasts CFL211: How to Be Present and Productive CFL214: Stop Worrying and Start Living Next Episode Bonni and I return for the monthly question and answer show. Submit your question for consideration next week or for the first question and answer show the first Monday of every month at http://coachingforleaders.com/feedback

307: How to Make Inclusion Happen, with Deepa Purushothaman Jul 24, 2017

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Deepa Purushothaman: Inclusion at Deloitte Deepa Purushothaman is a National Managing Principal of Inclusion at Deloitte. She speaks extensively about Deloitte’s focus on women and has been featured at national conferences and in publications like Bloomberg and Harvard Business Review. Key Points You don’t have to always do things they way they’ve been done before — you can find a new way that is authentic to you. As society evolves, companies need to think about how they provide inclusion for their employees. People are less worried about seeing a diverse leadership team than they are about feeling like they belong. Individuals need to feel a sense of belonging and connection. Inclusion is starting to play an important role in talent acquisition and retention. One of the biggest mistakes is not knowing where to start and then doing nothing. Employees join and leave companies based on whether or not there is an inclusive culture. Resources Mentioned Responding When Your Expertise Is Challenged Deepa Purushothaman on Twitter Related Episodes How to Handle Workplace Bullying, with Jill Morgenthaler (episode 172) How Women Make Stronger, Smarter Choices, with Therese Huston (episode 255) How to Help the Underdog Thrive, with Terry Lipovski (episode 275) Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

306: Five Steps to Hold People Accountable, with Jonathan Raymond Jul 17, 2017

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Jonathan Raymond: Good Authority Jonathan Raymond is the founder of Refound, a firm that believes we should all be aiming for more Yoda and less Superman. He is the author of the book, Good Authority: How to Become the Leader Your Team Is Waiting For* and the creator of the The Good Accountability course*. Many managers and leaders recognize when more accountability is needed, but few use a process that invites high performance and embraces the whole person. In his work at Refound, Jonathan invites leaders to imagine a world where personal and professional growth are one thing, and where improving your relationships and owning your strengths translate directly into the rest of your life. In this conversation, Jonathan teaches us a common language around accountability that works for almost everyone. Plus, he teaches us the five key steps of the accountability dial. Key Points Micromanagement is focused on tasks, but accountability is focused on relationships. Accountability doesn’t work unless there’s a context of personal caring. Employees want growth, and growth comes from productive discomfort. If you if you orient your day towards acknowledgment only on the positive side, you’re missing the better part of it. The 5 Steps of the Accountability Dial: The Mention The Invitation The Conversation The Boundary The Limit Resources Mentioned The Good Accountability course* Good Authority: How to Become the Leader Your Team Is Waiting For* by Jonathan Raymond Download the Accountability Dial Refound (Jonathan's Firm) Book Notes Download my highlights from Good Authority in PDF format (free membership required). Related Episodes How to Create Team Guidelines, with Susan Gerke (episode 192) New Management Practices of Leading Organizations, with David Burkus (episode 253) Moving Beyond Command and Control, with Brian Robertson (episode 258) Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

305: How to Deal With the Diminishers, with Liz Wiseman Jul 10, 2017

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Liz Wiseman: Multipliers Liz Wiseman has been listed on the Thinkers50 ranking and named as one of the top 10 leadership thinkers in the world and recipient of the 2016 ATD Champion of Talent Award. She is the author of three best-selling books, including Multipliers: How the Best Leaders Make Everyone Smarter*. Key Points Some leaders make the people around them less capable. Leaders who diminish others get less than half of their capabilities. Diminishing often comes from good intentions. Leadership is a skill you can learn. A good boss sees the genius in others. Find a way to let your boss know what you’re best at. By admitting our own mistakes, we create an environment where others are willing to take risks. Ask yourself how you might be shutting down people’s ideas and capabilities. Resources Mentioned Multipliers: How the Best Leaders Make Everyone Smarter (revised and updated)* by Liz Wiseman Related Episodes How to Engage With Humor, with David Nihill (episode 245) The Way to Stop Rescuing People From Their Problems, with Michael Bungay Stanier (episode 284) What Gets Between You and Greatness, with Lolly Daskal (episode 296) Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

304: How to Change Behavior, with Bonni Stachowiak Jul 03, 2017

Show notes

Bonni Stachowiak: Teaching in Higher Ed Bonni Stachowiak is the host of the Teaching in Higher Ed podcast, a professor of business and management at Vanguard University, and my life partner. Prior to her academic career, Bonni was a human resources consultant and executive officer for a publicly traded company. She is the author of The Productive Online and Offline Professor: A Practical Guide*. Questions Kristi asked about how to consistently apply what she’s learning from the show until new habits become unconscious behaviors. Kimberly asked for advice on how to handle a situation where she is co-managing a team. Bar asked about the best ways to navigate imposter syndrome. Jonny asked about avoiding career moves that may be motivated only by status or money. Resources Mentioned 7 Ways to Maximize Misery The Power of Habit* by Charles Duhigg Radical Candor* by Kim Scott Why Is Authenticity So Hard and How Can You Be The Best Kind of Real? - Chris Brogan Tom Henschel Interviews Dave (episode 300) Coaching for Leaders Academy Cars 3 Very Bad Wizards Related Episodes The Way to Make New Behaviors Stick, with Marshall Goldsmith (episode 196) The Best Way to Make New Habits Reality, with Kendra Kinnison (episode 217) How to Challenge Directly and Care Personally, with Kim Scott (episode 302) Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

303: The Way to Inspire Ownership, with Pete Mockaitis Jun 26, 2017

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Pete Mockaitis: How to Be Awesome at Your Job Pete Mockaitis is the host of the How to be Awesome at Your Job podcast, regularly listed as a top careers show on Apple podcasts. Key Points Your sense of ownership in your work can have huge consequences in how well things unfold. Self-efficacy has a large effect on your sense of ownership in your work. Try to connect the job someone is doing with the overall mission of the organization. The effects of micromanaging can be disastrous for an organization. When delegating a job, think about the critical components of the job and what you want the result to be, then let employees get the job done however they see fit. Delegation doesn’t have to be an all-in-one-shot type of thing, it can be done in stages. Steps to delegating: Watch me do this Help me do this Let’s do this together I’ll help you do this I’ll watch you do this. Resources Mentioned Albert Bandura The 80/20 Principle* by Richard Koch Essentialism* by Greg McKeown The ONE Thing* Gary Keller Jay Papasan Arthur Woods podcast episode Jeff McManus podcast episode Financial Intelligence* by Joe Knight Improve Your Financial Intelligence, with Joe Knight (episode 244) Episodes from the How to be Awesome at Your Job podcast that may be of value to your team: Increasing Confidence by Increasing Self-Awareness with Dr. Tasha Eurich Making Stress Work for You with Dr. Melanie Greenberg Overcoming Self-limiting Beliefs with R. Michael Anderson Honing Your Persuasive Skills with Kwame Christian Communicating with Inspiration and Clarity with Mawi Asgedom Related Episodes The Seven Steps You Follow To Delegate Work (episode 117) The Four Stories Leaders Need For Influence, with David Hutchens (episode 148) How to Challenge Directly and Care Personally, with Kim Scott (episode 302) Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

302: How to Challenge Directly and Care Personally, with Kim Scott Jun 19, 2017

Show notes

Kim Scott: Radical Candor Kim Scott is a co-founder of Candor, Inc. She has been an advisor at Dropbox, Kurbo, Qualtrics, ReelGoodApp, Rolltape, Shyp, Twitter, and several other Silicon Valley companies. She is the author of the book Radical Candor: Be a Kickass Boss without Losing your Humanity*. Key Points Show you care at a personal level. You can’t build a relationship that’s not personal. In order to care personally for someone, you have to bring your whole self, not just your “business” persona. Sometimes we get so focused on the work that we forget there’s actually a person doing the work. Begin by soliciting feedback, not by giving it. To get feedback, come up with a go-to question like “Is there anything I could do or stop doing that would make it easier to work with me?” Resources Mentioned Radical Candor* by Kim Scott Radical Candor podcast Book Notes Download my highlights from Radical Candor in PDF format (free membership required). Related Episodes Start With Why, with Simon Sinek (episode 223) How to Manage Abrasive Leaders, with Sharone Bar-David (episode 290) How to Get the Ideal Team Player, with Patrick Lencioni (episode 301) Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

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