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Back from the Borderline — Health & Fitness
Back from the Borderline

Back From The Borderline is a podcast about depth psychology, symbolism, spirituality, consciousness, and the search for a more meaningful life.

I started this show years ago while trying to understand my own mind. Somewhere along the way, the questions became much bigger than me. They led into Carl Jung, mythology, Christian mysticism, dreams, tarot, philosophy, esotericism, religious history, artificial intelligence, and the symbolic patterns that quietly shape the way we see ourselves and the world around us.

The word borderline has taken on its own meaning over the years. It speaks to the edge almost all of us eventually reach. That place where our old explanations stop working and we’re asked to learn an entirely different way of seeing. That’s the space my work inhabits.

Some episodes are conversations with researchers, psychologists, philosophers, historians, and spiritual teachers. Others are long-form essays where I follow a question wherever it leads. Lately I’ve been especially interested in symbolic literacy, the way images, myths, dreams, and archetypes quietly organize human life, often long before we’re consciously aware of them.

I’m not very interested in being “certain” about anything. I care about learning to recognize patterns, hold complexity without rushing toward easy conclusions, and recover forms of wisdom that help us live with greater honesty, imagination, and responsibility.

If you’ve found yourself searching for Carl Jung, depth psychology, symbolism, archetypes, spirituality, mythology, Christian mysticism, tarot, dreams, consciousness, philosophy, or the Western esoteric tradition, I think you’ll feel at home here.

Alongside the public podcast, I also host House of Cards, an ongoing study of the Rider-Waite-Smith tarot through psychology, symbolism, mythology, and contemplative practice, as well as MOODS, an app I designed for dreamwork and deep inner inquiry. Both are extensions of the same project: learning to see more clearly.

You can explore everything, including new episodes, House of Cards, Patreon, and MOODS, at backfromtheborderline.com.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Copyright: © mollie adler

Latest Episodes:

pete davidson: understanding patterns of unstable relationships and self-harm Jul 12, 2022

Show notes

In this episode, we take a closer look at comedian and actor Pete Davidson’s mental health journey, examining his openness about emotional struggles and trauma, and the journey that eventually led to his diagnosis of borderline personality disorder (BPD) in 2017. Known for his candidness, Pete has spoken about facing intense emotions, dissociation, explosive anger, depression, and challenges with substance use from a young age—experiences that have shaped both his personal life and public image. Through interviews and biographical pieces, we’ll explore how Pete’s story sheds light on the complexities of mental health and resilience in the spotlight.

Topics covered include:

Pete’s early experiences with trauma and loss, including the death of his father
His history with inpatient treatment and rehab, and his journey through recovery
How mental health struggles have influenced his career, including his time on SNL
Insights into his relationship history and how emotional challenges have impacted his personal life
The role of social media in his life and his decision to step away from it
His experiences with tattoos and tattoo removal as forms of self-expression

By analyzing Pete’s story, we’ll gain a broader perspective on the intersections of fame, mental health, and personal recovery, uncovering the resilience it takes to face these struggles openly. Join us for a reflective look at the ups and downs of Pete Davidson’s journey and the powerful message his story offers about mental health.

Recommended resources:

■ Pete Davidson’s full interview with Charlamagne Tha God (YouTube)

■ The Tragic Real-Life Story of Pete Davidson (Full Grunge Article)

Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com.

The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

the root cause of your deep fear of abandonment Jun 28, 2022

Show notes

Abandonment fear runs deep in the human psyche—it’s a primal instinct, woven into the fabric of how we connect with others. For some, this fear is manageable, an underlying hum that shapes relationships in subtle ways. But for those who struggle with emotion dysregulation, abandonment fear can feel overwhelming and consuming, creating patterns of self-protection that lead to isolation and confusion in relationships.

In this episode, we explore what it truly means to fear abandonment on a profound level. We’ll look at the difference between physical and emotional abandonment, how these fears develop, and the ways they can hijack our relationships if left unchecked. Many individuals who identify with certain mental health labels, such as borderline personality traits, often find that their most intense triggers stem from the terror of being left behind. Understanding this connection can be the first step toward breaking out of reactive, self-isolating cycles and finding healthier ways to relate to others.

Topics we’ll explore together include:

The real, lived experience of abandonment fear, beyond clinical definitions
Common symptoms and root causes of abandonment fear
How this fear intertwines with BPD traits and emotional reactivity
What triggers abandonment anxiety, and how it shows up in real-life scenarios

This episode offers a compassionate look at one of our most powerful fears and provides tools for navigating relationships in a way that fosters resilience and connection, rather than withdrawal. Join me as we unpack the layers of abandonment fear and explore ways to reclaim a sense of stability and self-trust.

Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com.

The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

how to cope when you feel like you have no control over your explosive emotions Jun 20, 2022

Show notes

If you’re a highly sensitive person who often feels overwhelmed by intense emotions, this episode is for you. We dive into the experience of having “big feelings”—emotions so strong they can feel all-encompassing and difficult to manage. Together, we’ll explore the concept of emotional permanence, the sensation that certain emotions feel unshakable in the moment, as well as emotional dysregulation, which can lead to intense, unpredictable reactions. We also discuss a challenging but important topic: how difficulties with emotion regulation can sometimes result in unintentional harm to loved ones. This episode sheds light on how to navigate these intense feelings with greater awareness and offers compassionate insights for fostering healthier, more balanced relationships. Join me as we unpack the complexities of big emotions and how we can learn to honor our sensitivity without allowing it to consume us or those we care about.

Recommended resources:

■ Martha Beck podcast interview about how deciding to quit lying for a year changed her life

■ Book | The Way of Integrity: Finding Your Path to Your True Self by Martha Beck

■ YouTube video further describing issues with emotional permanence and BPD

■ Article on how to deal with emotional impermanence

Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com.

The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

using radically open dialectical behavior therapy (RO DBT) to overcome issues with overcontrol May 30, 2022

Show notes

Are you known for always doing things “right,” following the rules, and keeping your emotions in check? If so, you may have what’s known as an Overcontrolled style of coping. People with this temperament are highly detail-oriented, vigilant to potential threats, and possess strong inhibitory control—the ability to hold back impulses and behaviors. On the outside, they often appear “high-functioning,” but beneath the surface, they may feel isolated, rigid, and unseen, with their struggles often going unnoticed.

In today’s episode, I’m joined by Larry Dahmer, a psychological associate specializing in Radically Open Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (RO-DBT), a therapeutic approach designed to support individuals with Overcontrolled coping styles. Larry shares insights into this groundbreaking therapy, explaining how it differs from standard DBT and why it can be transformative for those who feel stuck in cycles of perfectionism and emotional restraint.

We explore topics like:

What RO-DBT is and how it helps those with emotional overcontrol
The unique role of self-inquiry in RO-DBT and how it fosters flexibility and openness
Why Western society often encourages emotional overcontrol, and how this can lead to loneliness and disconnection
Embracing emotions like hopelessness and anxiety as teachers rather than enemies
Inspiring stories of change from Larry’s RO-DBT clients

If you or someone you know feels pressured to always “hold it together” but struggles to connect authentically with others, this episode offers a compassionate look at the Overcontrolled coping style and introduces tools for living with greater openness and fulfillment.

Learn more about RO-DBT at https://www.radicallyopen.net/

Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com.

Disclaimer: The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

how trauma throws you off balance (understanding your window of tolerance) [+ a discussion on asexuality] May 23, 2022

Show notes

Have you ever felt completely out of control of your emotions—sudden waves of rage, paralyzing anxiety, or a numb disconnection from life? If so, you might be living outside your “window of tolerance,” the optimal state where you’re able to handle emotions, manage frustrations, and make clear-headed decisions. When we fall outside this window, we can find ourselves hijacked by intense reactions, feeling either overwhelmed or entirely shut down.

In this episode, we explore the concept of the window of tolerance and how it relates to trauma recovery and emotional regulation. You’ll learn how our bodies respond to stress through fight, flight, or freeze mechanisms and why staying within this “optimal zone” can be key to living a grounded, emotionally resilient life. This episode is for anyone looking to better understand their emotional responses and develop tools to navigate life with greater stability and awareness.

Note: The first half of this episode includes a discussion of a book passage on asexuality and responses to listener questions on intuition, relationships, and emotional dysregulation. If you want to skip directly to the window of tolerance discussion, jump to minute 39.

Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com.

The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

signs you lack personal boundaries (feeling used and drained by other people) May 16, 2022

Show notes

Weak or nonexistent personal boundaries can leave us feeling drained, manipulated, and even resentful. In this episode, we’ll explore how to recognize if you’re struggling with boundary issues and the impact this can have on your sense of self-worth, emotional stability, and relationships. Many of us learn unhealthy boundary patterns early on, often tied to codependency and the need to please others, which can ultimately lead to feelings of worthlessness and passivity. If you want to skip straight to the boundaries discussion, jump to minute 16 after the listener Q&A. We’ll cover what personal boundaries truly are, why they matter, and how a lack of boundaries can affect your interactions with friends, family, and partners. We’ll also debunk common myths about setting boundaries and highlight the positive changes you can expect when you start asserting your needs.

In the premium version of this episode, available for subscribers, we take an even deeper dive into boundary-setting:

Understanding that you have the right to set boundaries and define your needs
How to uncover your boundaries by exploring your personal needs
Strategies for confidently saying “no” and recognizing when someone has overstepped
How to stop overcommitting and reclaim your time and energy
Sample conversation frameworks to help you set clear boundaries with loved ones and protect your emotional well-being

This episode offers practical insights and tools to help you reclaim control over your life, develop a healthier sense of self, and foster more fulfilling relationships. Join us as we unpack the essentials of boundary-setting and create a path toward genuine self-respect and stability.

Craving the full episode? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com.

The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

are you mentally ill or spiritually starved? (the problem with "disorder" and "dysfunction" labels) May 09, 2022

Show notes

Is it possible that what we often call “mental illness” might actually be a form of spiritual starvation? In this episode, we explore the limitations of traditional psychiatric diagnoses and question the narratives that define certain behaviors as “disorders” or “dysfunctions.” Diving into the complexities of the medical model in mental health, we discuss why diagnoses like “personality disorder” are often controversial, considering how they can overlook social context and carry heavy stigmas.

We also touch on how trauma-informed care and holistic approaches can offer a more compassionate, empowering framework for healing. From alchemical thought and symbolism to spirituality and myth, I’ll share how these elements have played a transformative role in my own recovery, helping me reconnect with a deeper sense of self beyond diagnostic labels. My journey has been guided by the motto “solve et coagula”—to break down and rebuild—a concept that embodies the heart of this episode.

Join me as we question the over-pathologizing of human emotion, explore the powerful role spirituality can play in recovery, and consider how a more integrated approach can help us live beyond the limits of labels.

Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com.

The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

no strings attached: the impact casual sex can have on our mental health May 04, 2022

Show notes

In this mini bonus episode, I answer a voicemail question from listener Kelly, who asks how to move forward to the next phase of her recovery journey. Together, we explore what it means to deepen your healing, letting go of old patterns and stepping into new growth. To wrap up, I’m also giving you a sneak peek of a premium episode where I dive into the nuanced topic of using sex as a form of self-harm—a powerful exploration of how unhealed wounds can shape our relationship with intimacy.

Craving the full version of this episode? Become a Premium Submarine to join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content, including ALL full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more. For the cost of a couple of coffees a month, you can start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com.

The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

understanding hyper-sexuality: how a history of trauma leads to sex as self-harm May 04, 2022

Show notes

In this episode, I dive into the complex and often unspoken ways that those of us with a history of complex trauma may turn to sex and intimacy as coping mechanisms—behaviors that, rather than healing, can lead to self-abandonment and re-traumatization. Through extensive research, I explore how compulsive sexual behavior and hyper-sexuality can emerge as responses to unprocessed trauma, often serving as temporary escapes that ultimately deepen feelings of disconnection. We’ll examine the nuances of what it means to use sex as a form of self-harm, from sexual masochism to other forms of intimacy that may feel more like self-sabotage than self-care. This episode also addresses the risks of engaging in sex work, such as sugar dating, OnlyFans, or prostitution, particularly for those who haven’t had the chance to fully process and heal from past trauma. By bringing these challenging topics to light, my hope is to encourage a more compassionate understanding of how trauma can impact our relationship with intimacy and to offer insights on recognizing and breaking free from cycles that may be keeping us disconnected from ourselves. Join me for an honest conversation that aims to shed light on the intersection of trauma, intimacy, and self-discovery.

Click here to check out the full Contrapoints video I played in the beginning of this episode, you can do so. (It's worth it, trust me.)

Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com.

The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

reclaiming your sexual agency after chronic objectification with dr. alexandra solomon May 02, 2022

Show notes

In this episode, I sit down with Dr. Alexandra Solomon, a licensed clinical psychologist and expert on love, intimacy, and relationships, to discuss what it truly means to reconnect with our erotic selves and find grounding in genuine pleasure—whether we’re partnered or not. Together, we explore how cultural expectations, societal pressures, and internalized “scripts” can disconnect us from our own desires, leaving us feeling unfulfilled and even resentful toward intimacy. If you’ve ever felt a sense of “sexual blockage” or wondered if you were somehow disconnected from your erotic nature, this conversation is for you. Dr. Solomon and I discuss the experience of performing sexuality instead of enjoying it, the frustration of feeling like intimacy is something we do for others rather than for ourselves, and the harmful impact of constantly putting our own needs last.

We also touch on topics that reveal just how pervasive these struggles are:

Dissociating during sex and the emotional distance it creates
The pressure to “perform” sexually as a means of attracting or keeping a partner
Dr. Solomon’s perspective on “the OnlyFans phenomenon” and the idea of “sex as self-harm”
The impact of hardcore pornography on sites like PornHub, reinforcing damaging gendered expectations in intimate relationships

Whether you’ve felt disconnected from your body, struggled with resentment toward intimacy, or been wary of “divine feminine” programs that promise to heal you for a steep price, this episode offers a refreshing, honest exploration of what it means to reclaim pleasure and embrace your own erotic journey on your own terms. Join us for a candid conversation that challenges the scripts and empowers you to reconnect with yourself.

RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

Book | Reclaiming Pleasure by Holly Richmond

Book | Come As You Are by Emily Nagoski

Podcast | Pleasure Mechanics

CONNECT WITH ALEXANDRA:

https://dralexandrasolomon.com/

Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com.

The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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