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I've been reflecting on my self-discovery journey, facing challenges and pondering profound questions this season. Recent conversations, especially those delving into my middle school experiences, have revealed personal truths and beliefs related to my sense of belonging.
Sharing these experiences isn't just about my journey but aligns with a broader theme observed among powerful women. As we navigate success, visibility, and seniority, we often compromise spaces where we can be authentic. This episode delves into the significance of investing in spaces that foster thriving, full expression, and true belonging.
It's time to prioritize our humanity, transition from survival to thriving, and acknowledge the immense potential in embracing our authentic selves. Join me as we explore this crucial investment in our well-being and growth.
GEMS DROPPED
"In the absence of belonging, my basement was that people would respect me …if looking for and embracing and trusting that belonging wasn’t available to me, that at the very least, I didn't go seeking anything beneath basic respect.”
“A big important part of our core and important part of this work for you, is to allow yourself to feel that you want to belong… to feel the wanting, to feel the desire, allow yourself to feel that. It's okay …you deserve to want that as opposed to just saying, well, I'm not going to assume that I belong, but I will assume respect and how do you know when one of the ways that we can think of respect is like a proxy for it, that can be sort of symbolic.”
“Especially in this day and age, we have got to cling to the things that bring us back into our humanity. We have got to. And when you're operating as the powerful woman, the woman who knows when you're operating at this level, and you have big dreams, big aspirations, and you've got the track record, you can look back and you can say look, check my receipts. I do the things, I operate in a big way, and I have every intent of doing what feels expansive. We're discounting this key aspect of what it looks like to grow and belong and make things happen as a fertile, loving collective.“
“As you become more and more successful, the more wealth you have, the more seniority you occupy, the more visibility that you have, there are fewer and fewer spaces where you can be your own human self, your real true blue, honest, quirky, full self because cameras are on, people are watching, your team is looking to you, everybody needs something from you. And so people don't always see you as human. Even those who are cheering for you.”
“Our humanity carries with it a tapestry of really critical energies– our true personalities, our preferences, our quirks, who we actually are. It’s an energy that is meant to be expressed. It is meant to flow. And when it is caged in and bottled up, because you are on a pedestal, you are on a platform, everybody is looking to you and you have to button the shit up, and you need to look a certain way, you need to say a certain thing, you need to…”
“Not everybody has the capacity to negotiate their own identities in the distance between your reality and theirs with personal security. People sometimes can't maintain their own self- esteem in your presence.”
“The privilege of just being able to be who you are out loud in front of people, bear and real and raw you, that has immeasurable value.”
STAY IN TOUCH
Come and follow me on Instagram @moniquershields and I would love your feedback so send an email to ambition@moniquershields.com.
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