Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura

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277-Your Mom's House with Christina Pazsitzky and Tom Segura Jan 21, 2015

Show notes

Mind if we burp? After Chipotle? And suckin stuff?

Well we've got that and more for you. Here's something we'd like to know - what exactly is Plies saying? We try to solve the mysteries of this modern day philosopher.

Plus does a communist from a small island have the tools to identify a sex toy? We have differing opinions on this one. Will you side with the right Mommy!?

Maybe if you're having troubles motivating yourself you keep it to yourself OR just go ahead and post every day how everyone is out to get you and everything is a battle and FIGHT! Fight things and people that aren't even there. That seems awfully stable of you.

You have the Jeans, you just gotta learn how to wear them.

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276-Your Mom's House with Christina Pazsitzky and Tom Segura Jan 14, 2015

Show notes

J-J-J-J-Jeans Unit!

This is a very special episode. In addition to being packed with content and the introduction of a new, amazing caller, we here at Your Mom's House are very proud to announce that the Main Mommy, Christina Pazsitzky (PaJeanSky) has released a NEW album!

Man of the Year is Christina's second album and is now available everywhere. Be sure to get a copy so that her jeans reach higher, tigher levels!

Plus the moms get down and talk about Tommy letting Christina do (and say) dumb things. Is it his fault?!? Tina worked out HARD this week. Is cross training fitness not a match for her?

Tommy is in LOVE with another crime show. This one is extra murdery and we break it down for you. Plus "Uncle Bill" whom we have been wanting to have on the show for years is finally here. All we can say about that is - you're not ready.

DENIM!

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275-Your Mom's House with Christina Pazsitzky and Tom Segura Jan 07, 2015

Show notes

Oh jeans it's here! Your first NEW momisode of the NEW year.

This one really delivers. Maybe it's us, maybe it's these jeans. We give you modern day philosopher, Plies. Tina has trouble deciphering his sounds, but once she gets it, she GETS it.

Plus we try to figure out what's up with Austin Uber drivers and all the different browns we had there.

Is there anything Steven Seagal doesn't know? Well, uh, that's a trick question. We jam out to a song that'll blow your mind. CP was inspired and now you'll be too.

Raise a pair of pants up for this one!

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274-Your Mom's House with Christina Pazsitzky and Tom Segura Dec 31, 2014

Show notes

What is love? When you've been someone long enough that you can say, "That's stupid of you," and then they respond, "Then I'm stupid. Let me be stupid!" That's true love. It's real contempt under a thin layer of decency that says, "I know I have to live with you."

When people have been together more than 50 years it can be quite colorfully spoken.

A fun game you can play with your significant other is ask strangers how old they think your partner is and then brace yourself when they (hopefully) guess FAR older. It's a real HOOT.

Plus Tom hung out with an older man in a sauna. Did it get weird? Well, they covered cannibalism, prostitution and drugs. So it gets fun.

The brown detectives may have solved an age old mystery. Maybe it will prevent future loose stools. We'll see.

Jeans, this is the final episode of 2014. Let's promise each other one thing, next year, even HIGHER!

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Merry Christmas-273-Your Mom's House with Christina Pazsitzky and Tom Segura Dec 24, 2014

Show notes

It's that time of year again - Baby Jesus has been born and there are great songs and hopefully wonderful gifts unless you're poor (yuck).

We, as always, give back to the little Mommies. And this time we really deliver. Unwrap the paper and take in some Shane Lee. That's right the internet sensation who "teaches" vocal lessons is now in the DOME!

He does impressions, requests and, well, whatever he feels like saying. It's awesome and it's here. Plus your two mothers have some wonderful clips including NEW (is that possible) talents that Steven Segal has - like God? (Actually, YES).

And what's a better gift than breakin down some brown with Top Dog. Rejoice!

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272-Your Mom's House with Christina Pazsitzky and Tom Segura Dec 17, 2014

Show notes

A man's desire to call out to a woman is so strong that it can overwhelm his own mental illness. Literally, the pieces that are missing in his brain will come together for a moment if that moment means sexual release.

Farts. This episode has them. From both mommies. Will you eat what we fart on?

Plus Garth meets Meeeh, meets more melodies. It's creepy, weird and wonderful all at the same time. Guys should cover their nipples, You BETTER wash your nuts and your other stinky parts (especially if you want someone going in there).

And we talk family - and what is a reasonable amount of time to spend with them - Minutes?

Get your festive jeans on!

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271-Your Mom's House with Christina Pazsitzky and Tom Segura Dec 10, 2014

Show notes

Yooooo! If you spend time overseas be careful! You could get AIDS. From a towel. Especially if a lot of dudes drop their stuff in that towel, ya feel me?

Pat Robertson is a national treasure. While some look to him for spiritual leadership, we find him to have his finger on the pulse of what's funny and this guy is hilarious.

Plus we have some new songs and we have to admit, they are DADGUM GOOD!

Can we teach you how to sing? Yes. BEATBOX? You betcha! AND we got that Chris Gaines music that you know you wanna hear.

Would you mind pulling your jeans a little higher?

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270-Your Mom's House with Christina Pazsitzky and Tom Segura Dec 03, 2014

Show notes

Are ya'll ready for some slick stuff? Cool stuff? NEAT stuff? What about RAW stuff? Well, you're gonna get it cause we're breaking down these walls between us and we like that!

Are you done wiping the vomit from the rim of your mouth? Good. Now get ready to puke again when Garth Brooks speaks and is genuine about "having a conversation" with you.

We get "Country" on this one, but it isn't all bad. We actually like some of your backwoods, incestuous anthems.

Plus Theo must face the fact that he's named after an accused serial rapists TV son. And that ain't gonna fly, Jack! We must give him a NEW name OR can we simply call him by his BIRTH NAME?!?! You mean he has one? Yup.

This episode is LOADED. Jeans UP!!

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Matt Fulchiron-269-Your Mom's House with Christina Pazsitzky and Tom Segura Nov 26, 2014

Show notes

Is your baby's mama here? You bet. Would you like to meet him? You should. You know, for the children.

If you're trying to take it all the way down your throat we have expert advice that's gonna set you straight (don't take it so far).

Plus a UK coach can drop that fire the same way Coach Ice does - only it sounds sweeter.

Some news reports are silly and some make you ask What The F*** Are We Doing Here? And then sometimes someone makes a song about it that's worthy of multiple replays.

Plus we have the Full Charge droppin sweet science on everything including Puddin Pops and Spanish Fly, Rude and Theo too. Oh, Cosby.

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Duncan Trussell-268-Your Mom's House with Christina Pazsitzky and Tom Segura Nov 19, 2014

Show notes

Duncan Trussell is here! You may know Duncan "Truffles" as the guy who has sex with pigs for laughs, but he's more than that!

D-Truss is our friend, a fellow podcaster and comedian, this sweet and enlightened man is here shining his radiance on us in a way only he can do.

We examine #TEAMLITTLED**K and what it means to breathe thru the bump in your baby head with the Smith siblings.

Plus Duncan takes us down the path of goodness. He points us and hopefully you towards the light with ideas and philosophies that are from a higher power, but simplified in a way that likens them to your poo covered B-hole.

Get your denim space suit on, we're leaving the Stratosphere on this one!

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