Your Mental Breakdown

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80. Sarah #16: It's Not Just a Fluke Jan 20, 2022

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Doug helps Sarah acknowledge that she is actively creating new neural pathways by doing things differently from her patterned way of being and doing. Sarah gives herself permission to see the changes in her behavior this past week as growth and progress in her therapeutic journey – it's not just a fluke! She is seeing in real time how defense mechanisms that were necessary for her survival are no longer necessary in her everyday life at every moment. We're starting to walk the path of thriving, not just surviving!

Doug Friedman

Meredith Levy

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79. Drew #70: The Middle Way Jan 13, 2022

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Drew is allowing himself to be who he really wants to be in his relationships with family, friends, and work – as well as with his girlfriend while they're separated. He is actively letting go of old ideas and discovering what it's like to not go "over and above" or "put on the cape" to rescue everyone, everywhere, all the time. It's the middle way! Doug is joined by his colleague and practice mate, Sasha Brodsky, for the clinical breakdown. They discuss issues of trust, judgement, awareness, and the internal preparedness and sense of safety that Drew is developing.

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78. Sarah #15: Trauma is a Radioactive Spider That Bites Jan 13, 2022

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We explore Sarah's conditioning from her upbringing in the Children of God cult. "Trauma is a radioactive spider that bites." It can lead you to develop powers of protection and systems of safety for your survival. Then we've got to learn what to do with that power because we might not need those defenses and protections in our life anymore at every moment. We also explore the idea of value – especially as it impacts self-worth.

Doug Friedman

Meredith Levy

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77. Sarah #14: Systems of Safety Jan 06, 2022

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We explore the "systems of safety" that Sarah developed as a child growing up in a cult to protect herself because no one else did. We can thank those defense mechanisms for doing such a good job of protecting us when a threat was real. We needed them to survive and now we need to say goodbye to them in order to thrive. Doug helps Sarah look deeper into those systems to see two sides of her - one that can be easy going and one that can be "mama bear," rigid, and take up a righteous quest for justice. The goal is not to keep the two sides separate, but rather to integrate them as pieces of the whole person she is and wants to become. Sarah is bringing awareness, understanding, and compassion to how she sees herself. Bonnie Rae joins Doug in the breakdown and they discuss OCPD (Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder) and how Sarah is processing her history of being wronged and abused by people in power (cult leader, boss, ex-husband).

The guest co-host:

Bonnie Rae psychotherapy

Doug Friedman

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76. Drew #69: Being in the Solo Dolo Dec 27, 2021

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Doug and Drew explore the idea that being solo is not just not about being alone or lonely. Drew is finding his confidence and strength in life outside of a relationship instead of making that one person in his life into the everything of his life. Drew is calibrating "the middle" rather than going all-in or all-out in situations, both in his personal life and his work life.

Doug Friedman

Meredith Levy

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75. Drew #68: Smoke & Mirrors Dec 16, 2021

Show notes

Drew explores what it means to experience life solo rather than go through his separation feeling lonely or alone. He and Doug talk about learning to balance the fairy tale, fantasy world version of love with the reality of what feels healthy and supportive. Doug helps Drew connect the anxiety about not knowing everything that's going on for someone with people lying or concealing things – historically like his mom using substances. Doug and Meredith discuss balancing highs and lows, and not just staying flat in the middle.

Doug Friedman

Meredith Levy

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74. Sarah #13: A Quest For Justice Dec 16, 2021

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Sarah feels righteous anger about a coworker that was let go. Doug helps her see that it's a trigger for her own traumatic past when people in power abuse that power and wrong others. When it's on someone else's behalf, Sarah has insulation, protection, and deflection from her own wounds, making it easier to take up a quest for justice. She is able to draw the link to her own history of being wronged and abused by people in power in the cult and her previous marriage and jobs.

Doug Friedman

Meredith Levy

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73. Drew #67: I Never Heard of a Chocolate Milkshake Being So Deep Dec 09, 2021

Show notes

Drew continues the process of individuation. He sees that sharing his life with his mom is now a function of him being proud of himself, not him looking to her for reassurance and self-worth. Drew acknowledges his own physical body and the sensations that come along with his emotional experiences. Doug helps him understand how regulating his physical body can help him regulate his thoughts and feelings. Drew explores feeling spread thin and starts thinking about where he chooses to put energy now – not just doing everything everywhere for everyone and burning out.

Doug Friedman

Meredith Levy

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72. Sarah #12: When You Realize You're Not 30 Anymore Dec 09, 2021

Show notes

Sarah felt validated and valued at work this week after a triggering annual review last week. Doug and Sarah explore how what she calls nonsense can make perfect sense to others. They break down issues of control and accountability. Sarah unpacks how her vigilance that others follow the rules is conditioning from her childhood in the cult.

Doug Friedman

Meredith Levy

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71. Drew #65-66: One Foot Out the Door Dec 02, 2021

Show notes

Drew got emotionally triggered after a recent funeral for a friend from back home. Then he made a surprise visit to his parents for his mom's birthday. Doug fills us in on what we missed in both Drew's last session (#65) that didn't get recorded, and a phone call that Drew and Doug had to process some relationship trouble. In the session Drew is able to go into the emotion underneath the recent triggers.

Doug Friedman

Meredith Levy

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