Trauma-Informed Parenting

Latest Episodes:

Episode 136 “Instead of” Tip 3 Feb 26, 2020

Show notes

Instead of Giving Orders, Offer Simple Choices When I was a young and naive parent, I thought I needed to have control all the time. There were no choices. My first child blew that theory out of the water. She was very much an “I can do it myself” child. If I didn’t offer her choices, she offered them to me. Turns out, giving kiddos choices is a powerful parenting tool, and a great skill for life! Grab a cup of coffee and grab your printable resource http://bit.ly/2LMcA52. Want to know more? Grab a copy of How to Have Peace When Your Kids are in Chaos https://amzn.to/2TbL8QI .

Episode 134 - "Instead Of" Tip 2 Feb 19, 2020

Show notes

Instead of Waiting for Behavior to Intensify, Respond Quickly We’ve all done it. We see the precursor to a meltdown or a potential fight brewing over a toy, but we wait. We wait because it isn’t that bad yet or hasn’t gotten violent. Next thing you know, the situation is out of control. Sometimes it helps to stop and ask yourself: Why wait? Would you rather spend five minutes addressing the behavior and reconnecting now, or spend the next two hours living with the fallout? It’s a pretty simple choice in my mind. I’ve learned from experience how draining the two-hour or day-long fallout of a complete meltdown can be. As a result, I lean toward addressing an issue while it is a tiny seed instead of waiting until it grows into a giant oak tree. Grab a cup of coffee and join Kathleen on this coffee break podcast for some stories, science, and what to do instead of traditional parenting.

Episode 133- Journaling Your Triggers and Your Child's Triggers Feb 17, 2020

Show notes

Why are memories so triggering? Have you ever smelled something like cinnamon rolls baking, or coffee brewing, and it suddenly evokes a feeling from a past event? Maybe it’s Christmas morning because your Mom made cinnamon rolls and coffee every year. Or maybe the scent of a perfume sends you to a dark place because you were at Aunt Mary’s house the time you were molested and she wore that scent liberally. Why does this happen? Why doesn’t the past just stay in the past? Grab a cup of coffee (and your journal) as she unravels the truth with some science, tips, and personal experience. Interested in trying the free module of How to Have Peace When Your Kids are in Chaos? Here it is - http://bit.ly/2OeODEu

Episode 131 - "Instead of" Tip 1 Feb 12, 2020

Show notes

Instead of a Lecture, Use Simple Language Many of us grew up with the lecture approach to parenting. For every infraction, Mom or Dad had a carefully selected and time-tested sermon they could pull from a database in the recesses of their mind. “If your great aunt Mary knew that you turned on a show in the middle of the night, [insert stories of monsters, bible verses, sticks in the eye, etc.].” You get the picture. Grab a cup of coffee and join Kathleen as she shares science, tips, and her own experience.

Episode 130 - When Traditional Parenting Doesn’t Work Feb 05, 2020

Show notes

Why Traditional Parenting Doesn’t Work When it comes to parenting kids who have had trauma, I struggle with imposter syndrome. I often ask myself, “How can I help other parents when I couldn’t do it perfectly or even well myself sometimes?” We must let go of the myth that perfect parents exist. They don’t. And raising kids who have had trauma means a huge learning curve for us parents — especially if we have parented our bio children okayish with great results. Join Kathleen for a coffee break explanation of why traditional parenting doesn’t work for kids who have experienced trauma.

Episode 126 - What to do When Nothing is Working Jan 22, 2020

Show notes

Sometimes we adoptive/foster parents are doing all the right things and nothing is working. We learn the science of attachment. We jump through the steps we need to attach. We learn the effects of trauma. And we apply the science and it’s still not working. What do we do when nothing is working? She shares three tips (from experience) on how to handle this season of “nothing is working.” Grab a cup of coffee and join Kathleen on this coffee break podcast!

Episode 125 - Helping Your Kids Navigate Codependent Relationships Jan 20, 2020

Show notes

Jessica continues her series on a healthy relationship with self by tackling the issue of codependency and our kiddos. Many of us were raised in codependent families and continue the practice without being aware of what we are doing. We then pass those habits and ways of navigating our relationships to our kiddos. How do we stop the cycle? What about kiddos who have come home through adoption/foster care? How do we help them pursue healthy relationships? Grab a cup of coffee and join Jessica and Kathleen as they tackle this much-needed topic - sharing their experiences plus some tips they have learned along the way!

Episode 122 - Post-holiday Blues and Regression Jan 08, 2020

Show notes

Are you experiencing post-holiday blues? It’s pretty normal. Think about how you feel. If you are feeling the blues and let down, can you imagine how much your kiddos are? Especially kids who have experienced trauma and have come home through adoption and foster care. They may not be able to process how are they feeling. In this episode, Kathleen shares some science and practical tips to help your kiddos through regression. Grab a cup of coffee and join her for a topic that is affecting us all right now.

Episode 120 - When You Don't Like Your Children Jan 01, 2020

Show notes

If you’re a Mom, you know that you can love your child unconditionally and still not like some of their behaviors. As Moms, we carry an extra load of Mom-guilt. I’m not sure where we got it. Maybe we all picked it up at Target by mistake. It seems to be a universal item we carry on our shoulders. We feel bad when we’re mad. (I rhymed). Right? Do you know who has an extra load of guilt? Foster parents. Adoptive parents. I’m not sure why. Maybe when we were signing all of those papers, we accidentally signed one for an extra bag of guilt with some fine print that said, I will always like this child no matter what he does. That’s just not realistic. In one day, I witnessed two foster Moms feeling guilty because they didn’t like their child that day. Grab a cup of coffee and join Kathleen and listen as she shares what to do with the dislike.

Episode 118 - Disorganized Attachment Dec 25, 2019

Show notes

In this episode of “Positive Adoption,” Kathleen finishes up the series on attachment styles in children. Today she talks about disorganized attachment. This is a great episode for the Christmas season, your adopted/foster child (or maybe we parents) may be regressing to a disorganized attachment style. Grab a cup of coffee and join Kathleen this Christmas!

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