The Sober Mom Life

Latest Episodes:

Who Are You Without Alcohol? with Kristi Tanner May 05, 2025

Show notes

Kristi Tanner is a sober influencer, sober coach, the owner of Sober Social, a wonderful NA bottle shop in Madison, Wisconsin, and a meeting host inside the Sober Mom Life Cafe. It is a life path that she never could’ve predicted for herself and it required her to search for the answer to a big question: who was she without alcohol?

Alcohol had become central to Kristi’s perceived identity. By the time she hit rock bottom in 2019, the single mom of four believed that she could not find any other way to get relief from her pain and unhappiness. But after a divorce, stints in rehab, a psych ward, detox, two DUIs and a night in jail, she had a terrifying realization - if she didn’t get sober she was going to lose her children, and she would deserve it.

Kristi remembered that she had loved living before she ever loved alcohol, and she had to find her way back to that feeling. It was then that she raised her white flag, accepted that she needed rehab, and began to search for who she was beneath the alcohol that was ruining her life.

Since that day in 2019 Kristi’s life has been turned upside down in the most beautiful way. She is now over 5 years sober, she has learned that there are better ways to handle her pain, and she has regained access to her joy. She has been open and curious about life without alcohol and has deeply found herself within a sober life.

Learn more about Kristi’s work:

Sober Social in Madison Wisconsin

Instagram @mocktailmommy

I started The Sober Mom Life Cafe so women just like you can find connection in sobriety. We have 4 Zoom Peer Support meetings every week, a monthly book club, and a private Facebook group so you can connect all day long. Join us here, now. ❤️

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Sobrietea: The Return of the Valley Apr 28, 2025

Show notes

Katie and I are here for another installment of SobrieTEA, where we spill the tea about our favorite escape: Bravo and Reality TV!

This week we’re diving deep into the return of The Valley, including Jesse and Michelle’s ugly divorce and co-parenting proceedings and Jax and Brittany’s navigation of substance abuse issues.

Plus - a check in on Southern Charm, which reality men Suzanne and Katie might’ve dated when they were younger, Love on the Spectrum, and a dash of true crime.

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From Weekend Warrior to Sober Coach with Real Sober Mom Jessica Apr 21, 2025

Show notes

As the daughter of a high school principal, Jessica felt a lot of pressure to stay in line. She never drank in high school, and even abstained through her freshman year of college. As the persona of ‘principal's daughter’ wore off, though, alcohol became a regular part of her life.

This became challenging when Jessica moved back to her hometown and took a job in education. Always worried about her public image, she kept her wits about her when drinking in public and began to prefer drinking at home. As she became a mom and shifted her career to work from home, drinking at home became a nightly habit.

Jessica and her husband moved to a lake home and began to throw regular parties. This ‘‘weekend warrior’ phase felt so fun - until it wasn’t. She increasingly found herself starting the week hungover and on the back foot.

It was at this moment that Instagram dropped one of Suzanne’s videos onto Jessica’s feed - a video simply telling her that she was allowed to not drink. This message hit on a feeling that Jessica hadn’t been able to voice, and something within her began to shift.

On New Year's Eve it all came to a head and Jessica followed her instinct - she didn’t want to drink that night. She felt more present with her family as they celebrated and made a big realization - sobriety was her new path. Sobriety has opened incredible new avenues for her! She is now a certified life coach and has begun to offer focused support to high achieving women interested in sobriety!

Jessica recommends the incredible Casey Davidson if you’re looking for further sobriety support

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You Are Allowed to Quit Drinking with Real Sober Mom Courtney Apr 14, 2025

Show notes

Alcohol wasn’t present in Courtney’s childhood, so when she was offered champagne by friends at a holiday when she was fifteen, she had no knowledge of how it would affect her. She only knew that it was ‘forbidden’, and what 15 year old wouldn’t want to try a forbidden thing? The cozy sense of warmth that overcame her was so appealing. After that day, alcohol easily slipped into her life.

Courtney experienced a series of red flags around her drinking through the years, but she ignored them. She clearly didn’t have a ‘problem’, so there was no reason to consider her relationship with alcohol too closely. Yet, as she became a mother, alcohol began to take up more and more space in her brain, and her relationship with it became more and more uncomfortable.

An unexpected third pregnancy that resulted in a miscarriage served as a wakeup call. She was given an opportunity to truly feel her emotions around alcohol, and to create new habits that required sobriety to enjoy. It felt so good, and she became fiercely protective of these new life choices. At that point, she began moderating and paying close attention to how alcohol made her feel until one day at a brewery it became completely clear: Alcohol was not serving her. In fact, alcohol was taking joy from her life. She was done.

Courtney has recently reached 100 days of sobriety!

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The Intersection of Sobriety and Disordered Eating with Liza Feilner Apr 07, 2025

Show notes

For women with a history of disordered eating, the first months of sobriety can often include an unwanted surge of challenging experiences around food.

Registered Therapist and eating disorder specialist Liza Feilner joins Suzanne and Susan today to help us navigate this tricky issue. Liza has over two decades of experience supporting women with eating disorders, and she has also been sober since she was 23 years old!

She’ll share why food challenges and disordered eating can arise in sobriety, the importance of giving yourself grace as you navigate major life changes, and how to seek help if you are struggling in this way.

Learn more about Liza’s practice: https://www.claritygroup.org/liza-feilner

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The Power of Sober Community with Real Sober Mom Maria Mar 31, 2025

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Maria is back on the pod! When she was last here she was six months sober, and today she’ll tell us about the changes, challenges, and wins she’s had in her sobriety journey in the past year.

You’ll hear why Maria no longer counts days, the normalcy she now feels regarding her sobriety, and the immense benefit that sober community has had in her life as she’s navigated through challenging times, such as an IVF transfer that didn’t pan out and a lapsed experience with cannabis.

Check out Maria’s first episode on the podcast here!

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Sobrietea: Traitors, Southern Charm + Summer House Mar 24, 2025

Show notes

Katie is nearing the end of her maternity leave and she has caught up on SO much TV while in the newborn bubble. So, we’re back to dive into all of the great Bravo that’s been on in the last few months!

Today, we’ll recap the great last season of Traitors, Southern Charm’s long awaited return, and how the new younger cast on Summer House has really changed the energy of the show.

Plus - Suzanne and Katie's thoughts on the second seasons of Severance and White Lotus, and Jax’s interviews about rehab.

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The Retreat Recap (with my Mom!) Mar 17, 2025

Show notes

Mom and I just got back from the latest Sober Mom Life retreat in Scottsdale, Arizona, and it was absolutely fantastic! This retreat was such a breath of fresh air and really solidified my feelings that we’re building an amazing community of caring, non-judgmental sober women.

You’ll hear all about the event, from the meals to the sessions to the bonding and everything in between. Plus, you’ll get the inside scoop on how to sign up for the next Sober Mom Life retreat if you'd like to join us in the fall!

Thank you to the wonderful companies that supported the retreat with their delightful gifts:

In My Sundays pajamas: https://www.inmysundays.com/

Adorn 512 Jewelry: https://www.adorn512.com/

Take the personality test Susan mentioned: https://viacharacter.org/

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Alcohol Doesn’t Make Things Special with Real Sober Mom Sarah H. Mar 10, 2025

Show notes

Sarah believed a myth: Alcohol Makes Things Special. She believed that alcohol was a special ingredient to make things fun ever since middle school when she took her first drink at a slumber party. This belief followed her through college and into adulthood, and because she didn’t experience intense hangovers or blackouts, she never gave the belief a second thought.

Once Sarah started having children, however, her experience of alcohol began to change. She noticed the sluggish, brain foggy nature of hangovers more than she ever had before. More worrisome for her, though, was her realization that drinking made her more aggressive. She wondered - did she like herself better when she was sober? Sobriety didn’t seem like an option, though. How could she enjoy a sober life when alcohol was the ingredient that made things special?

In 2022, Sarah tried Dry January and realized that something about sobriety worked for her. Thus began her two year journey of drinking with the blinders off, until she fully quit after having a surprising realization: She’d enjoyed her one sober night on her birthday trip more than any of the nights that she drank.

Slowly, Sarah started sharing her sobriety in public. The response was inspiring. So many women approached her wanting to know more, sharing their own worries about alcohol, and asking for advice. This fuels Sarah to live her sober life loudly!

At six months sober, Sarah’s mom passed away unexpectedly. The experience rocked her world, and she was so grateful that her sobriety was well intact. It helped her truly sit in her grief instead of reaching for the distraction of alcohol.

Check out Sarah’s article about sobriety on Indianapolis Moms!

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Taking the First Steps in Sobriety with Real Sober Mom Kim Mar 03, 2025

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Real Sober Mom Kim is three months sober! Today, she’s giving us a peek into this extremely important phase of sobriety.

Kim experienced postpartum anxiety with her second child. During her recovery, her therapist recommended that a glass of wine a night was no big deal if it helped her wind down, and Kim’s daily drinking began. Despite the fact that Kim was able to moderate, her life began to revolve around her nightly drink. The relief she found in the ritual eventually started to blot out other things in her life.

As a therapist, Kim knew she was using drinking was a coping mechanism. Recently, though, it became too much. She found herself intoxicated on the floor of her living room during a night with friends and she asked herself - how would she feel if her kids came home and found her like this? She did not like the answer, and that night, she decided to quit. The next day she joined the first meeting she could find online and her sobriety journey began. The meeting wasn’t a perfect fit, but it was good enough to help support her and keep her going until she found the Cafe. She is so glad she went.

At 3 months sober, Kim’s sobriety feels hard, but incredible! She shares about the unexpected anxiety she felt during her first sober month, how it dissipated, and the gorgeous glimmers that are now coming through in her sober life.

If you’re struggling with early sobriety, Kim wants to encourage you to keep going!

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