Stay ConnectedGen Xers (and a Xennial!) who were too young to watch Dallas the first time (yet totally did!) rewatch the episodes, review, discuss, laugh and have semi-deep discussions about it.
Warning: First season and a half has spoilers. If you‘re a first time watcher please be advised of this. If you don‘t want spoilers, please rejoin us in the middle of season 2 for a spoiler free and fun listening experience 😉
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Season 2, Episode 8: Election
Cliff Barnes is running for the State Senate and the Ewings are pretty pissed about it. Mostly since he's polling crazy high! They can't find any dirt on him until: JR lays some homophobic BS out at the table one night accusing Cliff of being gay and Pam flips her shit and yells that he used to be engaged. Pause. What happened? Why didn't they get married? Pam: "Uhhhhhh.... nothing.... I don't.... remember....." *hard eye roll* Good one, Pammy. 10 minutes later the Ewings have found out Cliff's secret: his ex died from having an illegal unsafe abortion (because they were illegal back then). Fit hits the shan! Also, Sue Ellen drinks and realizes she's sups attracted to Cliff... uh oh!
Join us as we talk about all this, talk about our summer plans, have some drinks and laugh a whole lot!
The Ewings are having an 18th birthday party for Lacy... oh wait, I guess her name is Lucy? They basically have no idea what her name is or why she lives there. They don't even seem to care if she's there, so girl steals JR's car and gets the fuck outta dodge. (They 100% have the party without her.....) She ends up hitchhiking (WTF?!??!!!) and gets picked up in a scary serial killer van by BJ from BJ and the Bear. Then the episode turns into a 70s cop show! Not one of the best episodes, but hey - we drink and make fun of it allllll the same!
Season 2, Episode 6: Double Wedding
When Pam was 15 she went on a cheerleading trip and ran off to Mexico to marry a guy shipping off to Vietnam! Now that guy is back in town causing trouble. Ooooh controversy! JR is totally stoked by this. Pam swears the marriage was annulled, but no one can find a copy of the annulment papers. Oh no! What will happen! Join us to find out.
Season 2, Episode 5: Black Market Baby
Sue Ellen REALLY wants to have a baby! The problem is that JR won't sleep with her - even when she drunkly challenges his virility. So, she decides to take matters into her own hands and adopt a baby. The adoption agency says it's gonna take 3 years because all these single women of the 70s having premarital sex are taking birth control and having abortions instead of having babies for rich white ladies! The nerve! Sue Ellen then realizes she could probably buy a baby from a pregnant woman. She is a Ewing after all - Ewings can buy anything!
Season 2, Episode 4: Bypass
Jock has a heart attack! Everyone feels guilty... Lucy tries to bang Ray again. Sue Ellen drunkly dreams of running Southfork. Meanwhile, Jock recovers in the hospital with his chest oiled up like he's about to pose for the Sexy Rancher 1979 calendar.
Season 2, Episode 3: Old Acquaintance
When Bobby and Pam got married he forgot to tell her one important fact: he'd been in love with and dating Jenna Wade for most of his life until, on the eve of their engagement at 20, she got cold feet and ran off to Europe.
Jenna came back not too much later divorced from a fake Italian Count name Naldo with a daughter named Charlie. Is Charlie Bobby's daughter? He didn't really care to find out 8 years ago when he was still broken hearted and bitter. Now, when Jenna shows up asking for his help and admitting that she never stopped loving him... he's more than curious - and confused.
Pam is pissed! She tries to play it cool, but Miss Ellie calls her out. Miss Ellie also admits that Jock got her pregnant before they were married and wasn't sure if he wanted "to do right by her". WHAAAAT?
Join us as we drink and dish about all this.
Gary and Val are reunited at Southfork, which basically puts everyone on edge besides Lucy and Miss Ellie.
Digger falls off the wagon and sells Pam to Jock for $100.
Today we'd say that Gary has severe anxiety (oh and is also an alcoholic...), in 1978 they just called him "weak". Well, the Ewing men do anyway.
Gary and Val decide to abandon their daughter again, because no one can just get an apartment in town? Oh, Dallas....
Season 2, Episode 1: Reunion Part 1
JR, while trying to keep his brother out of the office, sends Bobby to an Oil Conference in Las Vegas. Jokes on him though, because in Vegas, Bobby and Pam run into the 3rd Ewing brother Gary. doh!
Gary is a recovering alcoholic and gambler who has finally found peace from the turmoil of growing up as a Ewing. Bobby convinces him to come back to Southfork for a visit, because he's been gone for 16 years. Gary knows it's a terrible idea, but decides to give it a go.
Back at the ranch, JR and Sue Ellen are NOT into it. Jock is starting to realize that he effed up years ago in how he treated Gary, and Miss Ellie is all, "ZOMG! I get to talk about art and feelings again!!!!" Lucy, Gary's daughter is all, "Wait, who is this guy?"
Also, we meet Lucy's long lost mom Valene, who is an uneducated waitress, but obviously smarter than everyone else in the show.
Season 1, Episode 5: Barbecue
It's the season 1 FINALE and THE FIRST EWING BARBECUE!!! Everyone gets drunk, Pam gets pregnant, Digger and Miss Ellie flirt a little bit, there's some awkward use of people of color, Sue Ellen wants to be Lady Godiva, but no one ends up in the pool because we're still at Fake Southfork and there is no pool!
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Season 1, Episode 4: Winds of Vengeance
JR and Ray go to Waco, TX for the night. While there, they get wasted and hook up with two ladies: Wanda and Mary Lou. They leave early in the morning back to Dallas - hung over and happy with themselves.
Back in Dallas, the weather is getting bad. The ladies batten down the hatches, while Bobby and Jock decide to stay at the office instead of driving back.
In Waco, Wanda's husband Frick and his buddy Alan find Wanda and Mary Lou. Wanda says they were raped. Finding JR's business card (which has his home address???) Frick and Alan head to Dallas to SEEK REVENGE RAPE.
Yes, not kidding. This episode is about revenge rape. *side eyes writer's room*
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