The Couples Therapist Couch

Latest Episodes:

063: A Couple Educating Couples with Dr. Jameson and Herdyne Mercier Oct 02, 2018

Show notes

Often people try to please their partner and lose sight of what they want for themselves. It is important that we speak up for what we want in our relationships in order that we don't grow resentful over time.

In this episode with Dr. Jameson and Herdyne Mercier, they talk about how marriage takes work and they are dedicated to teaching couples the skills they need to have great relationships. They work with couples in their practice in Florida. They have a podcast called the Couples Counsel and have several videos on youtube for people to be able to learn about relationships.

The Couples Therapist Couch is the podcast for Couples Therapists about the practice of couples therapy. The host, Shane Birkel, interviews an expert in the field of couples therapy each week.

Please subscribe to the podcast for more great episodes.

Get your free copy of The Comparison of 7 different Models of Couples Therapy.

Click here to join the Couples Therapist Couch Facebook Group.

Check out Mercier Wellness and Consulting

Listen to the Couples Counsel podcast

Watch the Mercier's relationship videos

062: The 5 Core Issues from Pia Mellody and RLT with Kim Ploussard Sep 18, 2018

Show notes

Babies aren't born with the ability to have a healthy self-esteem and good boundaries with others. As humans, we learn these things from our parents, but often the education and modeling in our upbringing is lacking in some way. This relational trauma is what causes stress and problems for us in our adult relationships throughout our lives.

In this episode, Kim Ploussard talks about the 5 core issues that form the foundation of Pia Mellody's work. This is the framework for Terry Real's Relational Life Therapy and he credits Pia with providing the foundation for much of what he teaches. The 5 core issues are: 1. Self-esteem 2. Boundaries 3. Reality issues 4. Dependency 5. Moderation.

Kim Ploussard works a lot with couples in her practice in Albany, NY. She also does trauma intensives and is one of the coaches for Relational Life Therapy.

Please subscribe to the podcast for more great episodes.

Get your free copy of The Comparison of 7 different Models of Couples Therapy.

Click here to join the Couples Therapist Couch Facebook Group.

Check out Kim's website at albanylifeworks.com

Learn more about the Healing Trauma Network

061: EFT vs. RLT Debate with Figs O'Sullivan Sep 11, 2018

Show notes

In this episode, Emotionally Focused Therapist, Figs O'Sullivan, conceptualizes a case from the standpoint of working from the EFT perspective. Relational Life Therapist, Shane Birkel, talks about how an RLT therapist would work with the same couple. Figs and Shane talk through some of the similarities and differences in the two approaches and how they view couples cases that come in for therapy.

Figs is a Couples Therapist in San Francisco and the creator of the relationship quiz, Empathi. He has studied various couples therapy modalities, but is particularly dedicated to Emotionally Focused Therapy.

Please subscribe to the podcast for more great episodes.

Get your free copy of The Comparison of 7 different Models of Couples Therapy.

Click here to join the Couples Therapist Couch Facebook Group.

Check out Figs's practice website at therapywithfigs.com

Check out the relationship quiz Figs created at Emaphi.com

060: Relationships 101 with Signe Simon and Simone Humphrey Sep 04, 2018

Show notes

In the last few decades there has been an amazing amount of progress and movement towards freedom for individuals in many societies. While this freedom has afforded new opportunities for people, it has also brought about a new level of anxiety. At the same time, there have been advancements and change in the way we use technology. People are more connected than ever, while feeling more isolated and confused about how to navigate these new waters.

The need for relationship education is more important than it ever has been before. In this episode, Signe Simon and Simone Humphrey discuss the new rules of relationships and how we can make sense of them. They talk about what is important for therapists to understand as we are seeing more and more clients impacted by these realities in their relationships and dating lives.

Signe and Simone are both Psychologists in New York and are the founders of Lovelink. They have a wealth of information on their website and you can find out more about listening to their podcast and the relationship workshops they are offering.

Find out more at Lovelink.co.

The Couples Therapist Couch is the podcast for Couples Therapists about the practice of couples therapy. The host, Shane Birkel, interviews an expert in the field of couples therapy each week. There is an episode released every Tuesday about the practice of couples therapy. Please subscribe to the podcast for more great episodes! If you enjoyed the episode please leave a rating and review on iTunes.

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Learn more about the membership site for Couples Therapists and get on the list at https://couplestherapistcouch.com/work-with-me/

059: Emotionally Focused Family Therapy with Gail Palmer Aug 28, 2018

Show notes

As couples therapists, most of use have heard of Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), but the same foundations of this model are being used more and more in working with children, their parents, and their families. This model is called Emotionally Focused Family Therapy (EFFT).

From an attachment perspective, there is an assumption that parents and children are "wired" together. Parents can be an active agent in healing for the child by: (1) interrupting symptoms and supporting health-focused behaviors, (2) helping their child to process overt and underlying emotions that may be fueling problematic thoughts and symptoms, and (3) leading the repair of relational injuries if applicable.

In this episode with Gail Palmer we talk all about EFFT, how it evolved from EFT and how she is using it to effectively help parents and children who have been stuck. She has developed and teaches other therapists how to do this model.

Gail is one of the founding members of the Ottawa Couple and Family Institute and co-director of the International Centre for Excellence in Emotionally Focused Therapy and is Chair of the Education Committee. For over twenty years, Gail has trained and supervised therapists and students in Emotionally Focused Therapy and has conducted Externships, Core Skills Trainings and workshops on a number of EFT topics across Canada, the United States and Europe. She is co-author of Becoming an Emotionally Focused Couple Therapist: The Workbook.

Link to the EFT home page

Emotionally Focused Family Therapy link to the new book by Jim Furrow, Gail Palmer, Susan Johnson, George Faller, and Lisa Palmer Olsen.

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Learn more about the membership site for Couples Therapists and get on the list at https://couplestherapistcouch.com/work-with-me/

058: The Five Losing Strategies in Relationships with Shane Birkel Aug 21, 2018

Show notes

Get your free copy of The Comparison of 7 different Models of Couples Therapy. This report compares Emotionally Focused Therapy, Relational Life Therapy, The Developmental Model, The Psychobiological Approach to Couples Therapy, IMAGO, Gottman, and Internal Family Systems.

The episode today discusses the 5 losing strategies and also 5 winning strategies that couples can use in order to stop feeling stuck. Shane Birkel also gets into how to use the feedback wheel which is a valuable resource for helping couples communicate.

Click here to join the Couples Therapist Couch Facebook Group

Learn more about the membership site for Couples Therapists and get on the list at https://couplestherapistcouch.com/work-with-me/

057: Tiffany McLain on The Money Mindset for Therapists Aug 14, 2018

Show notes

As children, we grow up with money messages that we don't even realize are being implanted in us. We often have a hard time knowing how to explore or challenge the psychology of money and how it impacts each of us in a personal way.

As therapists, especially in private practice, we must have a deeper understanding of money both for our business and for our personal lives. In this episode Tiffany McLain talks about the psychology of money, how fear holds us back, having the life we want, talking with clients about money, setting fees and much more.

Tiffany McLain is a therapist in private practice in San Francisco. She is the founder of heytiffany.com which is a wealth of resources to help therapists make more money.

Click here to join the Couples Therapist Couch Facebook Group

Learn more about the membership site for Couples Therapists and get on the list at https://couplestherapistcouch.com/work-with-me/

Don't forget to visit heytiffany.com for more resources

056: Gottman and Infidelity with Jennifer Lagrotte Aug 07, 2018

Show notes

There is so much to consider when working with couples after an affair. The partner who feels betrayed is having a traumatic experience. They feel like the very person the depend on to support them is the one who has done something to hurt them more than anything. It is very important as therapists for us to have a clear sense of how we are helping people heal and recover from these situations.

Dr. Jennifer Lagrotte describes the method for dealing with affairs that is taught by the Gottman Institute. The process involves the steps of Atone, Attune, Attach and she goes into detail as to what this looks like in our work with clients.

Dr. Jennifer Lagrotte, DMFT, LMHC, LMFT, a therapist in practice in Parkland, FL, specializes in working with couples. She is an expert on showing couples how to stop fighting and start communicating. Her passion is couples, and she has dedicated her work to exclusively working with couples. Her speciality is affair recovery and uses the Atone/Attune/Attach Method, learned from in-person training with Julie and John Gottman. Learn more about her style at www.facetofacetherapy.com

If you want to find out the top 10 reasons people cheat or take a quiz on infidelity you can take a look here https://www.facetofacetherapy.com/therapy-services/infidelity/

Click here to join the Couples Therapist Couch Facebook Group

Learn more about the membership site for Couples Therapists and get on the list at https://couplestherapistcouch.com/work-with-me/

055: Attachment vs. Differentiation Debate with Nathan Hardy and Adam Fisher Jul 31, 2018

Show notes

This conversation explores the debate between differentiation and attachment. This episode is with the authors of an article entitled Attachment vs. Differentiation and in that article they use Emotionally Focused Therapy (Sue Johnson) vs. Crucible Therapy (David Schnarch) to compare these two models. We talk about whether these two developmental theories are compatible and whether or not it is effective for a therapist to try to integrate aspects of them at the same time, in our work with couples.

Nathan Hardy, PhD is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and professor at Oklahoma State University.

Adam Fisher, PhD is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist and professor at Brigham Young University.

Click here to join the Couples Therapist Couch Facebook Group

Check out their article here: Attachment vs. Differentiation

054: Love Worth Making with Stephen Snyder Jul 24, 2018

Show notes

As Couples Therapists we know that most people just don't talk about sex. Because of this, when people face sexual issues it can feel overwhelming, anxiety provoking and stressful. In this episode, Dr. Stephen Snyder M.D. talks not only about how to help guide couples to reduce their anxiety about sex, but how to help them have ridiculously great sex.

Dr Snyder has specialized in sex and relationship therapy for over 30 years in Manhattan, where he's helped over 1,500 individuals and couples regain closeness and satisfaction in their relationships.

Dr Snyder is also the author of one of the most acclaimed sex and relationship books of our time, LOVE WORTH MAKING: How to Have Ridiculously Great Sex in a Long-Lasting Relationship (St Martin's Press, 2018).

Click here to join the Couples Therapist Couch Facebook Group

Check out Stephen's website at sexualityresource.com

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