The Big Drink Rethink

Produced by winteraudio.co.uk

About Belinda Coker:

Belinda Coker is an Australian hiker, writer, and educator who helps women rebuild confidence through practical adventure and responsible travel.

She has completed solo hikes from Australia’s Red Centre to crossing Greenland’s Arctic Circle, experiences that shaped her belief that confidence grows through action, not theory.

Through her platforms, Soul Treader and The House Sitting Collective, she teaches how structure, trust, and responsibility create genuine freedom and stability in life.

Connect with Belinda:

Website: https://soultreader.com/

Ep 121: Toolkit '101' - How to Party Without Alcohol May 07, 2026

Show notes

Parties are supposed to be fun. So why does going alcohol-free feel so hard in a room full of drinkers? In this solo episode, Anna Donaghey draws on years of experience as an alcohol mindset coach and as someone who still actually goes to parties, to give you the toolkit she wishes she'd had.

This one is practical from start to finish. Anna walks you through how to prepare before you arrive, what to bring, how to handle the "just have one!" brigade, and how to manage that rising self-consciousness when the energy in the room starts to shift. She also talks honestly about the drunk gap, why it exists, why it's not your fault, and how to stop letting it ruin your night.

You'll leave with real scripts for declining drinks, strategies for those tricky social moments, and a reminder that waking up clear-headed the morning after a party is actually kind of wonderful.

Whether you're newly alcohol-free, sober-curious, or just exploring what a night out could look like without drinking, this episode has you covered.

Here are the Highlights:

00:00 Intro: Why parties without alcohol feel daunting

01:24 “But what do I actually do?” Why practical tools matter

02:13 The importance of a “before” plan – know your WHY for the night

05:44 Arrive calm, don’t underestimate your pre-party state

06:16 Why you need a drink in your hand within 30 seconds

07:01 Always have an exit plan (and travel independently)

07:57 No more “performative suffering” - enjoy your alcohol-free drink

09:55 You don’t owe anyone an explanation (scripts for awkward questions)

12:21 Seek out “real” conversations (and the power of good questions)

16:40 When others act weird about your not drinking

16:25 Understanding the party “arc” when the “drunk gap” opens

18:12 Missing out, or a sign it’s time to go? The case for an early exit

21:20 Why caring what others think fades over time

24:02 The underrated joy of a hangover-free morning after

25:10 The essential party toolkit

27:08 How sober socialising becomes second nature

Anna’s book "What Are You Thirsty For? Rethinking Alcohol and The Life You Want", is now out in the world for you to buy!

Order your copy, access her free tools and explore her coaching programmes at: https://thebigdrinkrethink.com/

About the host Anna:

Anna is a certified Alcohol Mindset Coach, trained by Annie Grace of This Naked Mind. Drawing on her own journey out of alcohol addiction, she now helps others explore and control their drinking. With a career spanning 25 years as a Strategist in the Advertising industry, she combines her own lived experiences, with great insight into what makes us tick and what influences us to behave the way we do.

Connect with Anna:

Produced by winteraudio.co.uk

Ep 120: The Shortcut To Belonging | Rethinking Alcohol | Apr 30, 2026

Show notes

Why does alcohol feel essential to parties, celebrations, and big social events? And what’s really at stake when you rethink your drinking in those spaces? Anna Donaghey is joined by Evan Cudworth, a self-described “party coach,” who shares his personal journey through alcohol-fueled confidence, alter egos, and radical new rituals.

Together, they explore why we outsource energy and confidence to booze, how nostalgia can keep us stuck, and why the real “party” has to start within. Evan Cudworth breaks down his unique framework for building confidence and joy without alcohol and offers stories from both wild raves and deep silence at Burning Man.

Whether you’re worried you can’t party sober (or just curious how presence can replace performance), this episode shares new possibilities.

Here are the Highlights:

00:00 Intro: The myth that drinking is the party

01:16 Why parties without alcohol feel unimaginable

07:21 Creating alter egos: who are we trying to access?

09:31 The “alcohol is a credit card” analogy

11:42 How social norms & culture shape drinking

14:44 Parties as rituals: St. Patrick’s Day and celebration engines

20:30 The act of doing shots and what it really signifies

24:42 Sober rituals and the power of intention

29:56 The party within: reclaiming confidence and aliveness

33:59 Building new evidence: is partying sober actually crap?

34:44 The 7-stage “Party Within” framework

44:41 Stop chasing nostalgia, what if you created joy instead?

48:22 “Live more, numb less”, a new party philosophy

51:05 The ultimate invitation: be the energy you want to see

52:03 When it’s not about you: making others feel they belong

Anna’s book "What Are You Thirsty For? Rethinking Alcohol and The Life You Want", is now out in the world for you to buy!

Order your copy, access her free tools and explore her coaching programmes at: https://thebigdrinkrethink.com/

About the host Anna:

Anna is a certified Alcohol Mindset Coach, trained by Annie Grace of This Naked Mind. Drawing on her own journey out of alcohol addiction, she now helps others explore and control their drinking. With a career spanning 25 years as a Strategist in the Advertising industry, she combines her own lived experiences, with great insight into what makes us tick and what influences us to behave the way we do.

Connect with Anna:

Produced by winteraudio.co.uk

About Evan Cudworth:

Evan Cudworth is, as far as anyone can tell, the world's first & only party coach - and he believes partying will save humanity. A nerdy UChicago graduate who came up in the underground rave & music scenes. Alongside his own struggles with validation, alcohol, & substances, in the post-pandemic chaos he created The Party Within, a 7 step framework for high-achieving adults who've been sold the lie that optimisation and fun are opposites.

His argument is simple and a little heretical: the wellness industrial complex has made us more isolated, more rigid, and worse at being in a room together -and the cure is learning to actually party in our modern world.

He's inspired thousands to libertate their social lives from anxiety, scrolling, & substances, and his work has appeared in GQ, the Washington Post, the Los Angeles Times, and Teen Vogue.

He's here to make the case that partying might be the thing that saves us.

Connect with Evan:

Website: https://partycoach.me/

Ep 119: The Act of Showing Up | Alcohol Coaching Apr 23, 2026

Show notes

What does it really mean to “show up” in your life and how is that different from simply “turning up”? In this solo episode, Anna Donaghey explores one of the most honest motivations she hears from people rethinking alcohol: the desire to be present. She shares why presence goes so much deeper than physical attendance. Alcohol is often used as an emotional buffer, and what’s possible when you start showing up as the unfiltered version of yourself at home, at work, and in every room you enter.

Anna offers a powerful reframe: real presence is not just a skill for parties, but a life skill that transforms relationships and the texture of daily life. This episode is packed with gentle invitations to experiment with being genuinely present for yourself and the people who matter most.

Here are the Highlights:

00:00 Intro: Today we’re exploring the quest for true presence

01:32 The difference between turning up and showing up

03:41 How alcohol acts as a costume, buffering us from authenticity

07:05 Alcohol, performance, and the “gap” we’re trying to bridge

10:55 Children and loved ones can feel when you’re only “half there”

11:54 A new version of attention is possible

13:13 The surprising gifts of ordinary, real-time connection

14:19 Why social events can feel the hardest

17:06 Learning to trust your own presence

20:06 Reframing sobriety: not deprivation, but a richer experience

23:26 Real presence includes awkwardness and dullness

24:14 Letting your actual energy lead is both vulnerable and enough

27:35 Real confidence versus performed confidence

30:07 Showing up is a gift to others, not just yourself

34:37 Final question: will you turn up or show up?

34:46 What’s coming next: unpacking the cultural architecture of alcohol and social life.

Anna’s book "What Are You Thirsty For? Rethinking Alcohol and The Life You Want", is now out in the world for you to buy!

Order your copy, access her free tools and explore her coaching programmes at: https://thebigdrinkrethink.com/

About the host Anna:

Anna is a certified Alcohol Mindset Coach, trained by Annie Grace of This Naked Mind. Drawing on her own journey out of alcohol addiction, she now helps others explore and control their drinking. With a career spanning 25 years as a Strategist in the Advertising industry, she combines her own lived experiences, with great insight into what makes us tick and what influences us to behave the way we do.

Connect with Anna:

Produced by winteraudio.co.uk

Ep 118: When Avoidance Stops Working with April Day Garcia | Rethinking Alcohol | Apr 16, 2026

Show notes

What happens when the strategies we rely on to avoid pain, achievement, busyness and constant momentum stop working?

In this powerful conversation, Anna Donaghey is joined by April Day Garcia, author of The Room to Be Brave: Sometimes the way forward begins with going back, to explore how avoidance can hide in plain sight, especially for high-functioning people disguised as success.

April shares how chasing achievement and belonging led her further from herself, with alcohol acting as a quiet form of escape. When a period of forced stillness changed everything, she began the deeper work of healing, returning to the “rooms” where old beliefs began.

This episode offers a hopeful reframe: avoidance isn’t failure, it’s protection and real change starts not with becoming someone new, but with coming home to who you already are.

Here are the Highlights:

00:00 Intro: Rethinking avoidance with April Day Garcia

00:45 The art of avoidance and the illusion of achievement

02:27 April’s memoir mapping unravelling through literal rooms

05:11 Running from the pain, and chasing achievement

09:33 How avoidance can sometimes look like high performance

11:31 No room for vulnerability, linking emotions to old, unsafe moments

13:49 Alcohol’s role in numbing, postponing, and belonging

16:50 Avoidance creates new problems, emotional costs rise

20:35 The clear rupture: seeing darkness reflected in family

23:07 Having a breakdown broke the cycle, and led to giving up alcohol

38:09 The hardest rooms: confronting your own mistakes and shadow work

41:55 Old beliefs aren’t yours and reclaiming your true self

44:12 Redeveloping your rooms and rewriting your story

52:36 Choose your hard, start with one room

54:04 Healing isn’t failure, sometimes your truest self is waiting in the rooms you feared most.

Anna’s book "What Are You Thirsty For? Rethinking Alcohol and The Life You Want", is now out in the world for you to buy!

Order your copy, access her free tools and explore her coaching programmes at: https://thebigdrinkrethink.com/

About the host Anna:

Anna is a certified Alcohol Mindset Coach, trained by Annie Grace of This Naked Mind. Drawing on her own journey out of alcohol addiction, she now helps others explore and control their drinking. With a career spanning 25 years as a Strategist in the Advertising industry, she combines her own lived experiences, with great insight into what makes us tick and what influences us to behave the way we do.

Connect with Anna:

Produced by winteraudio.co.uk

About April Day Garcia:

April Day Garcia spent years in forward motion - busy, capable, and running without knowing it. As a Certified Occupational Therapy Assistant, Reiki practitioner, and self-described chronic over-doer, she was excellent at moving through life while avoiding the rooms that needed her most.

Sober since August 2024, April has been doing the harder work: going back into the experiences that shaped her deepest beliefs about herself, sitting in those spaces long enough to heal them, and discovering that who she was on the other side had been there all along. Her debut memoir, The Room to Be Brave: Sometimes the way forward begins with going back, is the story of what it means to stop running - and be brave enough to go back.

Connect with April:

Book: https://a.co/d/01NvRuC9

Instagram: @theroomtobebrave

Website: https://www.aprildaygarcia.com/

Ep 117: The Art of Avoidance: Why Alcohol Works…Until it Doesn’t Apr 09, 2026

Show notes

What really drives us to reach for alcohol, and why is avoidance so quietly powerful in our habits? In this episode, Anna Donaghey unpacks the psychology behind using alcohol as a coping mechanism, revealing how it silences discomfort and acts as a fast-acting state change in our modern lives. Drawing from her own lived experience and insights from her Substack “The Thirsty For More Mindset Lab,” Anna explores how avoidance is not weakness, but a deeply human strategy rooted in our biology and history.

She dives into the difference between signals (those uncomfortable feelings and nudges) and state changes, explaining how alcohol overrides what our mind is trying to tell us. With practical examples and gentle guidance, Anna encourages listeners to get curious about their own habits, question the signals they might be silencing, and imagine life with alternative strategies that don’t come at such a cost.

Here are the Highlights:

00:00 Welcome, this week we are exploring the theme of avoidance

01:03 How alcohol is used to numb and silence discomfort

02:20 The British Medical Council: alcohol as the nation’s favourite coping mechanism

04:04 Avoidance as an intelligent survival strategy, not denial

05:12 Our ancient brain responds to discomfort

06:00 Alcohol as a fast-acting state changer, it quietens the alarm

08:23 Alternative avoidance strategies: work, scrolling, food

09:09 We have a regulation systems, relief can be instantly available

10:01 Learning to listen to discomfort

13:17 Anna’s Sunday “unease”, discovering the real signal beneath the habit

14:04 Signals as information about our needs and alignment

15:07 When avoidance no longer works, what comes next?

16:04 Imagining alternative strategies without the cost of alcohol

Anna’s book "What Are You Thirsty For? Rethinking Alcohol and The Life You Want", is now out in the world for you to buy!

Order your copy, access her free tools and explore her coaching programmes at: https://thebigdrinkrethink.com/

About the host Anna:

Anna is a certified Alcohol Mindset Coach, trained by Annie Grace of This Naked Mind. Drawing on her own journey out of alcohol addiction, she now helps others explore and control their drinking. With a career spanning 25 years as a Strategist in the Advertising industry, she combines her own lived experiences, with great insight into what makes us tick and what influences us to behave the way we do.

Connect with Anna:

Produced by winteraudio.co.uk

Ep 116: Tiny Clarity Moments 2 | Alcohol Coaching | Apr 02, 2026

Show notes

Why do we agonise over disrupting the social flow by saying “no thanks” to a drink, even when alcohol is quietly disrupting so much more in our lives? In this thought-provoking solo episode, Anna Donaghey explores the micro-moments of clarity that often crop up when we consider changing our drinking habits. Drawing from a recent conversation with Ry Gavan, Anna explores how alcohol quietly sits behind so many social occasions, becoming a synchronised ritual, yet the real disruptions to our wellbeing are often overlooked, minimised, or accepted as “just life.”

She examines the tension between the fear of social awkwardness and the reality of how quickly our circles adapt, and offers practical tools to handle that brief moment of discomfort.

This episode is for anyone ready to question the script, trust those quiet nudges, and make choices around alcohol that genuinely align with who they are.

Here are the Highlights:

00:00 Welcome to “Tiny Clarity Moments 2”

01:06 Wanting better sleep, energy, patience, but fearing social awkwardness

03:20 The imagined disruption versus reality

04:26 Ry’s true story: friends adjust, little actually changes

05:01 The disruptions we tolerate: poor sleep, lost weekends, tension

07:16 A question to ask: what disruptions am I already accepting?

07:47 How do you make it easier to say no?

09:41 Why you don’t owe an explanation

10:44 Changing the subject and shifting the conversation

11:04 The power of holding an alcohol-free drink in your hand

11:33 Reframing: you’re just doing something different tonight

13:31 Embracing quiet confidence, normalising intentional choices

14:23 What disruption is really worth worrying about?

15:22 Creating space for others by asking honest questions

The first part of this mini-series on Tiny Clarity Moments can be found here on Apple or here on Spotify.

Anna’s book "What Are You Thirsty For? Rethinking Alcohol and The Life You Want", is now out in the world for you to buy!

Order your copy, access her free tools and explore her coaching programmes at: https://thebigdrinkrethink.com/

About the host Anna:

Anna is a certified Alcohol Mindset Coach, trained by Annie Grace of This Naked Mind. Drawing on her own journey out of alcohol addiction, she now helps others explore and control their drinking. With a career spanning 25 years as a Strategist in the Advertising industry, she combines her own lived experiences, with great insight into what makes us tick and what influences us to behave the way we do.

Connect with Anna:

Produced by winteraudio.co.uk

Ep 115: When Alcohol Is the Backdrop Mar 26, 2026

Show notes

What happens when we question alcohol’s role as the backdrop to almost every social moment? In this powerful episode, Anna Donaghey is joined by Ry Gavan from DRiNKLiNK, a Scotland-based charity supporting families affected by someone else’s drinking, for an honest conversation about the ripple effects of alcohol in our lives.

Rather than focusing solely on “extremes,” Anna Donaghey and Ry explore why alcohol’s real power lies in its expectation: its presence at celebrations, commiserations, sport, family gatherings, and so much more. They explore the underlying fear of social disruption when someone opts out, the tension between belonging and authenticity, and the surprising reality that our imagined social fallout rarely materialises.

This episode is a must-listen for anyone curious about the social script around drinking, the underestimated impact of alcohol, and what actually changes (for the better) when you step outside the expectation.

Here are the Highlights:

00:00 Intro: Exploring alcohol as the expected backdrop

01:04 The tension of opting out

02:08 Ry’s story

05:24 Social rituals, identity, and the anxiety of changing your “role”

09:50 Alcohol is woven into Scottish life, sports, family, and celebrations

11:28 Grey area drinking, and challenging the “boring” label

14:43 Underestimating the real disruption of drinking

15:15 Alcohol’s impact on deaths, hospitalisations, and NHS strain

18:34 How one change can influence others in the group

19:26 Belonging anxiety, why standing out feels risky, but rarely is

22:36 Moving beyond thinking alcohol as the “glue” of social connection

29:53 Confidence and learning to love who you are

33:53 Underestimating the real impact of drinking

35:26 DRiNKLiNK’s work and impact

40:07 Alcohol and social inequalities

42:28 Testing your assumptions and finding new evidence

44:43 Gamifying sobriety, progress, joy, and positive change

46:15 How to connect with DRiNKLiNK and share your story.

Anna’s book "What Are You Thirsty For? Rethinking Alcohol and The Life You Want", is now out in the world for you to buy!

Order your copy, access her free tools and explore her coaching programmes at: https://thebigdrinkrethink.com/

About the host Anna:

Anna is a certified Alcohol Mindset Coach, trained by Annie Grace of This Naked Mind. Drawing on her own journey out of alcohol addiction, she now helps others explore and control their drinking. With a career spanning 25 years as a Strategist in the Advertising industry, she combines her own lived experiences, with great insight into what makes us tick and what influences us to behave the way we do.

Connect with Anna:

Produced by winteraudio.co.uk

About Ry Gavan:

Ry Gavan works with DRiNKLiNK, a Scotland-based charity supporting people affected by someone else’s drinking.

He’s passionate about destigmatising sobriety and challenging the expectation that alcohol is required for connection.

His work focuses on the ripple effects drinking has on families and communities and what changes when we begin to see clearly without it.

Connect with Ry:

Website: https://drinklink.org/

Ep 114: Who Am I If I Don't Drink? | Alcohol Coaching | Mar 19, 2026

Show notes

Who are you, really, if you remove alcohol from your life? In this deeply thoughtful solo episode, Anna Donaghey takes on the big, unsettling question: “Who am I if I don’t drink?”

Rather than focusing on willpower or missing out, Anna Donaghey explores the real, often unspoken identity shifts that happen when we rethink our relationship with alcohol. With psychological insight, lived experience, and practical tools, she explores why alcohol feels like more than a habit, it becomes a social uniform, a signal for belonging, and even a “scaffolding” for how we move through life.

Exploring topics like “identity lag,” belonging, and the power of meeting your true self, Anna Donaghey guides listeners through the discomfort and liberation that can come with letting go of drinking. She offers gentle reframes, challenging listeners to consider not just what they’ll lose, but the strengths and surprises they might gain. This episode is for anyone feeling curious about life on the other side of drinking.

Here are the Highlights:

00:00 Intro: Rethinking your relationship with alcohol

01:03 “Who am I if I don’t drink?” - the question beneath the fear

03:29 Drinking as a “social passport” - ritual, friendship, and fitting in

04:34 The need to belong and why challenging alcohol can feel threatening

06:14 Alcohol as a uniform, how it signals our role in different settings

07:16 Meeting yourself as an adult without alcohol for the first time

08:25 Identity lag: why our sense of self changes slower than our behaviour

10:06 How alcohol helps us perform or buffer feelings

12:55 Ask: “Who have I not allowed myself to be?”

13:32 Outgrowing old coping strategies

14:38 Using alcohol as armor, scaffolding, or stabilisers

18:47 Liberation and alignment, shifting from performance to true self

20:41 If alcohol wasn’t in the picture, what would remain and what might strengthen?

Anna’s book "What Are You Thirsty For? Rethinking Alcohol and The Life You Want", is now out in the world for you to buy!

Order your copy, access her free tools and explore her coaching programmes at: https://thebigdrinkrethink.com/

About the host Anna:

Anna is a certified Alcohol Mindset Coach, trained by Annie Grace of This Naked Mind. Drawing on her own journey out of alcohol addiction, she now helps others explore and control their drinking. With a career spanning 25 years as a Strategist in the Advertising industry, she combines her own lived experiences, with great insight into what makes us tick and what influences us to behave the way we do.

Connect with Anna:

Produced by winteraudio.co.uk

Ep 113: The Courage To Become Someone New with Andrew Drasen | Rethinking Alcohol | Mar 12, 2026

Show notes

How do you truly start over, and what does real reinvention look like? In this episode, Anna Donaghey talks with Andrew Drasen, author, speaker, and survivor about life beyond sobriety, diving into identity, purpose, and hope.

Andrew’s journey goes far beyond addiction, spanning imprisonment, loss, and the search for meaning. He shares his struggles with self-image, rebellion, and choices that led to incarceration, as well as the heartbreak of losing loved ones, including his fiancée Caroline.

Together, Anna and Andrew explore how we cling to unsustainable identities, and how radical acceptance, creative rebuilding, and writing his memoir A Vision of Hope became acts of healing. This conversation is a reminder that change is possible. Healing isn’t the end, it’s the beginning.

Here are the Highlights:

00:00 Rethinking drinking and identity

01:15 Andrew’s story: addiction, loss, and the reckoning

02:42 Childhood, self-image, and early substance use

04:04 Identity as “life of the party” and rule-breaking

07:58 The snowball effect: risky behaviour and its consequences

09:40 False bravado, ego, and self-worth

13:01 First arrest and inevitability of trouble

15:49 Escalating to heroin and survival mode

17:47 Turning points: a break in sentencing and glimpses of hope

20:00 Recovery, 12-step meetings, and writing

21:32 Grieving loss, healing through creativity

22:07 Losing Caroline, deep identity work, and transformation

33:29 Andrew’s recovery framework

38:28 If you’re afraid of change: the courage to try

40:00 Recovery as a beginning, not an end.

Anna’s book "What Are You Thirsty For? Rethinking Alcohol and The Life You Want", is now out in the world for you to buy!

Order your copy, access her free tools and explore her coaching programmes at: https://thebigdrinkrethink.com/

The Thirsty For More Mindset Lab is Anna’s ‘inner circle’ - a calm, thoughtful space where conversations continue, patterns are explored, and things begin to make sense. Find out more at: https://thirstyformore.substack.com/

If you appreciate the podcast and would like to show a bit of love, you can donate the cost of a coffee here. It helps support the time and care that goes into making the show: https://buymeacoffee.com/bigdrinkrethink

About the host Anna:

Anna is a certified Alcohol Mindset Coach, trained by Annie Grace of This Naked Mind. Drawing on her own journey out of alcohol addiction, she now helps others explore and control their drinking. With a career spanning 25 years as a Strategist in the Advertising industry, she combines her own lived experiences, with great insight into what makes us tick and what influences us to behave the way we do.

Connect with Anna: