The Art of Charm

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316: Gabriel Wyner | Fluent Forever: How To Learn And Remember Languages Sep 19, 2014

Show notes

Hack Language Learning. "You get to meet different parts of yourself by going through the process of learning other languages." - Gabriel Wyner The Cheat Sheet: What is the European scale of fluency? There is such thing as the language gene: true or false? A simple language hack you can do at home watching TV. How to boost your retention by 40% and 50%. The first way to start learning a language: it's NOT the way we're taught in school. Why you don't need grammar drills. And so much more... There are people who are fluent in multiple languages: are they freaks of nature or do they have the "language gene"? Or are there tricks, tools and life hacks the rest of us can use to learn and remember foreign languages? Our guest today is Gabriel Wyner is the author of Fluent Forever, a book about how to learn languages quickly and how to retain them forever. Join us as we talk about his techniques for learning a language quickly and retaining it, what the tremendous benefits are to fluency, the obvious and not-so-obvious ones, and where to get started when you decide to learn a foreign language...and loads more! More About This Show: Even though Gabriel Wyner has authored Fluent Forever, a book on language learning, he wasn't always a language aficionado. He was a good language student in middle school and high school, but only in the respect that he tested well. He couldn't speak any language he learned outside of the classroom and after awhile, he had forgotten much of the vocabulary he had learned. In college, he double majored in Mechanical Engineering and Voice. He always wanted to be an engineer so he opted to go that route, but he also loved singing so he wanted to make that more than just a hobby. As a voice major, he had to learn to sing in Italian, Spanish and German. Not knowing a lick of German, his friend suggested he go to a school in Vermont called Middlebury and take a summer program. If Gabriel opted into one of their programs, it meant he had to speak the foreign language of his program for the entire time he was there. If he slipped up, he would be kicked out and would lose all of the money he had paid to be there. It sounded crazy enough to work, so he signed up and spent the next 7 weeks immersed in German. At the end of those 7 weeks, he was a B1 or a B2 on the European fluency scale, meaning he could order in a restaurant and carry on an in-depth conversation with ease. But that wasn't enough for him, he returned the following summer and earned a C1 certification in German. That certification meant he was fluent on the European scale; in Europe, if he had wanted to, he could teach in their school system and he could write an academic paper with ease. Even though immersion works, Gabriel realizes not everyone has time for that. Most of us can't take 7 weeks off and run to Vermont to learn another language! If you're like most people and need to learn a language within the confines of a typical life, he has plenty of suggestions for you in this episode. His first suggestion when getting started is to learn the pronunciation of a language. Train your ear to hear the words in that language, before you do anything else like learning the alphabet or colors or numbers. After you've trained your brain on how to hear the language, which will take about 2-3 weeks, then learn basic words. But here's a critical life hack to doing so: use images. And not just any images, use the Google search tool in your target language to learn the images associated with words. Often simple words mean something else to their native speakers. Once you've moved through those stages, then go on to learn the grammar. But all you need is your grammar guide, you won't need grammatical drills...Gabriel tells us why. One last tip he leaves us with is a way to expand our vocabulary and become fluent faster after we're speaking a new language. When you find you don't know a word, you can either revert back to English or you can use the other words you do know in the new language and get other people to help you fill in the blank. You'll have the added benefit of having learned something new from someone (and perhaps giving them a laugh in the process), and having learned while under a bit of stress which makes your brain retain it better. Please join me in thanking Gabriel for being on the show. He was a fun guest to have on. I loved that we debunked some language myths, gave you some life hack language-learning tools and generally set the foundation for the fast, easier way to learn and retain a language. Thanks for being here and we'll see you next time. THANKS GABRIEL! If you enjoyed this session of the Art of Charm Podcast, let Gabriel know by clicking on the link below and sending him a quick shout out on Twitter: Click here to thank Gabriel on Twitter! Resources from this episode: Gabriel's web siteFluent Forever, Gabriel's book Gabriel on TwitterAnki You'll also like: -The Art of Charm Toolbox -Best of The Art of Charm Podcast HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dug this episode, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from all the fluff out there. FEEDBACK + PROMOTION Hit us up with your comments and guest suggestions. We read EVERYTHING. Download the FREE AoC app for iPhone Email jordanh@theartofcharm.com Give us a call at 888.413.7177 Stay Charming!

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315: Jennifer Verdolin | Wild Connection Sep 17, 2014

Show notes

Are deeper voices more attractive? "Animals show us to take our best attributes, whatever they are, and highlight them, display them." - Jennifer Verdolin The Cheat Sheet: Looks matter! and why biology supports this. (6:00) What MHC is and why it's so critical to successful attraction. (11:35) Why pretending to be something you're not doesn't work in the long run. (22:00) This type of bird actually divorces, Jennifer explains. (24:55) Men are biologically programmed to hear deeper voices better: true or false? (33:00) Jennifer gives us three steps to become more attractive. (38:00) And so much more... Is it possible to learn how to be successful in dating and relationships from animals? According to our guest for episode 315, it is. Dr. Jennifer Verdolin of Duke University is the author of Wild Connection and she has devoted her academic life to studying the mating and dating behaviors of the animal world. Today she joins us to talk about what she's observed in the animal kingdom, how humans can apply it to their own lives to better understand themselves, their dating experiences and their relationships. More About This Show: Dr. Jennifer is a scholar-in-residence at Duke University; she's also a writer, scientist and animal behavior expert. Her book, Wild Connection, gives the low-down on what the love lives of animals can tell us about human relationships and human dating. She has spoken on the topic with NPR and has her own weekly blog on Psychology Today (links to both are in the resources section below). I thought she would be a fascinating guest to bring on and we dive into the correlations between animal behavior and human behavior in the relationship world. It turns out there are far more similarities than you might think, and we can learn a lot from our animal counterparts. On today's show, Jennifer and I talk about those similarities and what we might learn including why animals rarely have miscommunications, why humans do and what we can apply from animals to lessen those miscues, as well as why deception never works in the long-run when you're looking for a lasting relationship. Animals aren't dishonest and don't camouflage who and what they are, humans should do the same. Regarding the topic of miscommunication, this is a common occurrence that just isn't seen in the animal world. Jennifer says there are three steps we can take to have fewer communication issues. Listen to each other better. men are programmed to pay attention to deeper voices, biologically programmed to do so. men should be aware of this and take steps to listen to their mate's voice. women can speak deeper. Stop talking over one another - animals don't do it because it doesn't work. They want to receive information so they listen. Our brains can't multi-task so if you're thinking of a response while someone is talking it's the same as if you were actually talking according to your brain. Explain what you mean in detail. The greater amount of detail you give the better your chances of being heard and understood. When it comes to pretending to be something you're not, again animals don't do this because it doesn't work to find a proper mate. In human lives, eventually the other person is going to see who you really are. Instead of pretending to be someone or something you're not, find your best attributes and display those because there is someone out there who finds those attributes attractive. The best way to feel confident and comfortable in who you are and the attributes you have is to take stock of yourself. What do you like? What don't you like about yourself? Now what can you change and what must you accept? You'll never be 6'5" so accept the height you're at, there IS someone out there who will find you attractive. But if there are things about yourself that you don't like and you can change, then do so. Do you like wish you were more confident and charming in social situations? Then make a plan to become more social, more charming and act on it. You'll find yourself becoming more comfortable and more at ease with who you are as you do, all of which makes your more attractive to others. Please join me in thanking Jennifer for being on the show. She is knowledgable, funny and she graciously shared a host of suggestions to get you on your way to finding the ideal relationship. Be sure to listen and then take action on what we talk about in this show. Thanks for being here and we'll see you next time. THANKS JENNIFER! If you enjoyed this session of the Art of Charm Podcast, let Jennifer know by clicking on the link below and sending her a quick shout out on Twitter: Click here to thank Jennifer on Twitter! Resources from this episode: Jennifer's web siteWild Connections, Jennifer's book Jennifer's blog on Psychology Today Jennifer on TwitterJennifer on Facebook You'll also like: -The Art of Charm Toolbox -Best of The Art of Charm Podcast HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dug this episode, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from all the fluff out there. FEEDBACK + PROMOTION Hit us up with your comments and guest suggestions. We read EVERYTHING. Download the FREE AoC app for iPhone Email jordanh@theartofcharm.com Give us a call at 888.413.7177 Stay Charming!

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314: Shane Snow | Smart Cuts Sep 15, 2014

Show notes

Lateral Thinking Solves Problems Better. "If you truly love life, don't waste time because time is what life is made of." - Bruce Lee The Cheat Sheet: Facebook and The Death Star: we compare. The 3 ways to change on a micro level. Skeptical optimism: what it is and why it is a powerful habit. The Charlie Rose technique: how and when to use and why it's effective. What ben franklin has to do with all of this. The 5 second rule to overcoming your fears. And so much more... If you wrote for Wired or Fast Company, do you think you'd find innovative ways of living and working? The answer is yes, of course you would! And our guest for episode 314 does just that. Shane Snow, author of Smart Cuts, is also a writer for these notable tech publications and he's here with us to share what lateral thinking is, how to use it for greater innovation in every area of your life and how to use neurotic spreadsheeting to make your life rock. More About This Show: Shane Snow is a whiz at finding out what makes people go against the grain and think in ways the average person doesn't. He's explored and studied this topic in depth, it's the theme of his book Smart Cuts. He's even coined a phrase for it called "lateral thinking". He says lateral thinking is reframing problems in such a way that you come up with different rules or you rearrange the pieces in new ways and see new things as a result. In short, lateral thinking about a topic is "Macgyvering" it: seeing a solution that is completely out of the box. In this show, we go into detail on how to create habits of lateral thinking as suggested by Shane. One of his primary moves is to create what he calls "neurotic spreadsheets". These spreadsheets list your problem and then every possible assumption about that problem. Then list the answer to the question: what if this assumption weren't true? This will help you create a detailed, neurotic spreadsheet about your situation. Later in the show, Shane and I revisit neurotic spreadsheeting and apply it to discovering why someone was the best and why. Shane did this for former US presidents and his results were startling. He looked at multiple factors like who had the highest approval rating, how much time they spent in Congress, etc. He shares his findings with us - it's really interesting! Neurotic spreadsheeting is just one component of how to create lateral thinking habits. Another, perhaps easier, way to do this is by simply asking the question "Why?" -And not in an annoying way but getting to the bottom of why something has been done a certain way can help us reframe how we look at it. This line of thinking and questioning in business will help us to break convention and create innovative solutions, where others can't or don't see those solutions. Although we cover much more on this show, one final piece of advice Simon had for us is his 5 second rule. It goes like this: you have five seconds to do something or agree to do something, even if you are afraid of doing it. Are you afraid to speak in public, but you were just offered an incredible keynote opportunity? You have five seconds to say yes. When you do this often enough, you'll eventually stop being afraid of what you're agreeing to and become far more afraid of breaking your word to yourself and letting yourself down. You can apply this to any area of your life from your career to your love life. Too afraid to ask her out? Use the five second rule: give yourself til the count of five and then go ask. This is something Shane uses daily and it's made a world of difference what he takes on. Shane and I cover a lot of ground in this episode, he was an awesome guest to have with us. His lateral thinking approach, his habit of skeptical optimism are additional powerful topics we touch on. Be sure to listen and then start implementing his Smart Cuts' suggestions. We'll see you next time. THANKS SHANE! If you enjoyed this session of the Art of Charm Podcast, let Shane know by clicking on the link below and sending him a quick shout out on Twitter: Click here to thank Shane on Twitter! Resources from this episode: Shane's web siteSmart Cuts, Shane's book Shane on TwitterEpisodes of MacGyver online You'll also like: -The Art of Charm Toolbox -Best of The Art of Charm Podcast HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dug this episode, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from all the fluff out there. FEEDBACK + PROMOTION Hit us up with your comments and guest suggestions. We read EVERYTHING. Download the FREE AoC app for iPhone Email jordanh@theartofcharm.com Give us a call at 888.413.7177 Stay Charming!

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313: Tom Corley | Rich Habits Sep 12, 2014

Show notes

"One of the reasons they call it 'the secret to success' is that people don't even understand that their habits are the cause of their wealth or poverty." - Tom Corley The Cheat Sheet: A goal is only a goal if it has these two things: what are they? Is wealth really as simple as working harder and working more? Consistency: why it's so important For 30 minutes every day, the rich do this: what is it? The best strategy to network with the rich, even if you are average or poor. What is opportunity luck? And so much more... Have you wondered what separates the rich from the not-rich? Is it luck or some closely-guarded secret? Or do the wealthy simply do things differently every day? Are there rich habits and are there poor habits? Our guest for episode 313, Tom Corley, has done extensive research and written a book on the subject. He says there are habits that separate the rich from the poor. In this show, Tom and I talk about what those rich habits are, how we can change them, how to network with the wealthy, whatever size your bank account...and so much more! More About This Show: Tom Corly is a CPA by trade who spent 5 years interviewing 233 rich people and 120 poor people. He analyzed that data over a 16 month period and came up with some startling revelations: there is no "secret" to getting wealthy, there are simply daily habits the rich engage in and daily habits that poor people do too. And the two sets of habits are miles apart. With the data he gathered and the insights he uncovered from his study, Tom wrote the book Rich Habits and launched his Rich Habits web site. On the show today, he shares some of the material in the book as well as his personal story of being wealthy as a child, losing it all and the impact that experience had on him. When Tom was 9, his family was running a business that had made them very wealthy. They were worth $4-$5 million dollars (quite a lot back then), until a fire took all of that overnight. Tom's family struggled to rebuild and he had to put himself through college. He worked nights as a janitor, and went to school during the day. All the while that painful loss from his childhood acting as a thorn in his side, urging him on. That loss would play a factor in why he undertook his 5 years of research and later published his first book. But the tipping point that pushed him over the edge was when a wealthy client of his came to him for help. The man was losing his business, everything he had worked for and he had no idea what he was doing wrong. He asked Tom for help. There wasn't much Tom could for him and he had no advice to give. All of his clients were already wealthy when they joined his company so he had never watched them grow and amass their fortunes. So Tom began to look for resources for his floundering client; Tom wanted to understand what the rich did differently on a daily basis. Not finding any books or other sources on the topic, Tom saw the opportunity to fill a gap in the marketplace and his Rich Habits brand was born. On this episode, Tom and I talk about those rich habits and what they are. Did you know 79% of rich people watch under an hour of TV a day? Instead, they are out hustling: they are volunteering at charitable organizations, teaching, speaking or networking several nights a week. And all of those activities are focused on getting them to their next goal or dream. But Tom admits it goes deeper than simply working harder and doing more. Rich habits are also built by our belief systems, or mini computer programs as Tom calls them. In fact, beliefs might be the "secret" to what's holding you back if you aren't wealthy. The good news is you can change those beliefs. It's a matter of awareness, and then creating a new habit to replace the old, negative one that is holding you back. And consistently doing so over a period of time, Tom recommends 18-254 days to create a new habit. There's plenty more of those nuggets in this episode! Tom was an awesome guest who provides insightful how-tos on building your rich habits every day, networking with the wealthy on your way to the top and creating something he calls opportunity luck. Have a listen and then starting shifting those daily habits into rich habits! We'll see you next time. THANKS TOM! If you enjoyed this session of the Art of Charm Podcast, let Tom know by clicking on the link below and sending him a quick shout out on Twitter: Click here to thank Tom on Twitter! Resources from this episode: Tom's web siteTom's books Tom on TwitterHow The Rich Spend Their Time, Tom's blog post You'll also like: -The Art of Charm Toolbox -Best of The Art of Charm Podcast HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dug this episode, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from all the fluff out there. FEEDBACK + PROMOTION Hit us up with your comments and guest suggestions. We read EVERYTHING. Download the FREE AoC app for iPhone Email jordanh@theartofcharm.com Give us a call at 888.413.7177 Stay Charming!

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312: James Fell | The Myth of the Alpha Male Sep 10, 2014

Show notes

"In a lot of ways, the whole Alpha Male thing is just an excuse for being an asshole." - James Fell The Cheat Sheet: Scientific research has debunked the Alpha concept: true or false? Why you should run towards danger (i.e., your fears). The secret to finding your innate talents Ready, fire, aim: why this is a valid approach to get things done. How body for wife became a brand, then a web site and a book. Action is the antidote to despair: who said this and why it matters. And so much more... Alpha Male. Today you can't turn on a TV, go into a bookstore or walk down the street without having the concept thrown in your face (often times literally). And it's a concept we at The Art of Charm and our guest for episode 312 don't buy into, not unless you want to be a douchebag. James Fell is a fitness and health writer for the LA Times, Ask Men, the Chicago Tribune and Time magazine, and he joins us to talk about why the alpha male marketing idea is bullshit, how to actually face your fears and grow your confidence to achieve your dreams without relying on the instant-fix ploy of Alpha Male and how to know who to listen to for advice and when...and plenty more. More About This Show: One of the biggest issues James and I both have with the Alpha Male idea is that it takes guys who are trying to build their confidence and develop themselves and basically teaches them to be assholes. And it says that by acting like a tough guy with muscles and a spray tan, they'll magically get a hot girlfriend, become a millionaire and all their problems will be solved. Instead of being truthful about what will get them those things: putting in the time, effort and energy to develop their inner game, learn how to connect and build relationships with women and in business and gain the skills and confidence to cope with anything life brings their way. Because this idea, as opposed to the Alpha Male thing, isn't a quick fix. It's not sexy to tell someone it's going to take them years to become who they want to be and get what they want. But the reality is it does take time, it does take effort and it does take commitment. Both James and I agree on that. We also agree on the importance of running towards your fears and facing them to build that confidence. James says it's important to take baby steps and build that confidence, acquire your goals bit by bit. Take a look at where you want to go, the skills you want and need to develop to get there and then set a foundation to get there through self-improvement, self-reflection and hands-on learning, even formal education where it's appropriate. Action is key, another point we agree on. No amount of daydreaming will get you that Ferrari. James even shares the exact reason why daydreaming actually stops you from achieving what you want. His advice? Instead of daydreaming, strategize how you're going to get from where you are now to where you want to be. Then go out and do it. James and I discuss SO much more in this show. He was an awesome guest who pulled no punches in giving us the lowdown on why Alpha Male is bullshit, how to be who you really are and get what you really want. He gives some real-life examples and strategies you can use, so have a listen and get moving! We'll see you next time. THANKS JAMES! If you enjoyed this session of the Art of Charm Podcast, let James know by clicking on the link below and sending him a quick shout out on Twitter: Click here to thank James on Twitter! Resources from this episode: Six Pack AbsBody For Wife James on TwitterHow To Find (and Keep) A Girlfriend You'll also like: -The Art of Charm Toolbox -Best of The Art of Charm Podcast HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dug this episode, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from all the fluff out there. Ways to subscribe to The Art of Charm FEEDBACK + PROMOTION Hit us up with your comments and guest suggestions. We read EVERYTHING. Download the FREE AoC app for iPhone Email jordanh@theartofcharm.com Give us a call at 888.413.7177 Stay Charming!

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311: Adam Grant | Give and Take Sep 08, 2014

Show notes

"Whatever kind of giving you're focused on, it starts with asking the question: What do other people need?" - Adam Grant The Cheat Sheet: The different categories of giving value. How to give to someone you don't know - the RIGHT way. What are stage gates and how should you use them? How to avoid social capital suicide. The power of powerless communication: Abe Lincoln showed us how. Chunker vs Sprinkler And so much more... The latest buzz in the online marketing and entrepreneurial world is to give value and the profits will come back to you. Is this really true and does it work when it comes to networking and expanding our social circles? Adam Grant has the answer to that question and he's our guest for episode 311. Adam is the author of "Give and Take" and an organization psychologist professor at Wharton School of Business. He was also named by Malcolm Gladwell as one of his favorite social science writers. In this show, Adam and I talk about how to spot takers and protect yourself against them, how to use the 5 minute favor to expand your social circle in a favorable way and give yourself greater happiness in the process, and lots more! More About This Show: Most of us probably believe we're givers, or at the very least we want to be giving to our social circles. But chances are some of us simply aren't giving. Adam Grant helps us rectify that in this episode. One of the best ways to be a giver or an even better giver than you are now is to simply ask what others need. If you know what they need, you can find a way to give it to them. Or you can approach the person you want to give to by sharing what you're good at and how you could contribute to them. For example, if you are an encyclopedia of research studies let them know that and tell them they can contact you if they are looking for a particular study or you can help them find a study that supports a concept they're exploring. If you're looking for a way to connect with that person before approaching them, there's an app called Refresh which will gather all their social media information and collect it in one place for you. You can look for things or people or connections you have in common and use that as a talking point to establish common ground. Once you've connected and have bonded, you can go deeper into the relationship to find out what their greatest needs are and how you can fulfill those needs. And if one of those needs you fulfill involves introducing another person, Adam and I discuss the proper steps to doing so with a double opt-in introduction. The double opt-in helps you avoid the embarrassment of introducing two people who already know each other or two people who actually can't help each other for reasons you aren't aware of. Though we discuss many more powerful topics, one of the last I want to highlight here is powerless communication. This is the art and craft of giving some of the power in a connection to the other person, thereby showing you are willing to give for the greater good and you aren't there simply to take advantage of the situation. Adam shares how Abraham Lincoln used this technique so effectively. There's plenty more content Adam and I discuss in this show. He was a great guest with loads of concrete giving tips for better networking and a better life. I enjoyed having him with us, I hope you dig this episode too. Thanks for listening and we'll see you next time. THANKS ADAM! If you enjoyed this session of the Art of Charm Podcast, let Adam know by clicking on the link below and sending him a quick shout out on Twitter: Click here to thank Adam on Twitter! Resources from this episode: Adam's web site6 Ways To Get Me To Email You Back, Adam's blog post If You Do This, Your Emails Might Be Rude, Adam's blog post Adam on TwitterRefresh app You'll also like: -The Art of Charm Toolbox -Best of The Art of Charm Podcast HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dug this episode, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from all the fluff out there. FEEDBACK + PROMOTION Hit us up with your comments and guest suggestions. We read EVERYTHING. Email jordanh@theartofcharm.com Give us a call at 888.413.7177 Stay Charming!

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310: Michael O'Neal | Solopreneur Hour Sep 05, 2014

Show notes

"You've got to take imperfect action. You literally have to start. It doesn't matter if it's not perfect. It doesn't matter if it crashes and burns." - Michael O'Neal The Cheat Sheet: Why he decided to stop trading time for dollars. The business takeaway from the fake orgasm scene in When Harry Met Sally. Why it's important to say "yes" and the lesson he learned from doing so. Why you can't teach hustle. His near-death experience 10 days before he launched his show and why he still launched. What separates the haves from the never will be people? And so much more... There are times in our lives when we face a challenge, an adversity so daunting we can only cope by going into survival mode. But with time, patience, the right attitude and the proper support, we can take those experiences and propel ourselves into lives we never even dreamed possible. Here to share his own version of this is Michael O'Neal from The Solopreneur Hour podcast. In episode 310, we talk about how the loss of both of his parents in less than a year devastated and altered his life completely, how that experience led to his commitment to never trade time for dollars again, why it's important to say yes and be open and how to get past the fear of creating a new business and lifestyle of your own. More About This Show: In the very early days of the Internet, Michael O'Neal was one of those early adapters. He created and designed web sites and made a good living doing it. Eventually he left the office world and became a freelancer working for himself. He was so good at what he did that he was courted by a Fortune 500 company. He didn't need the job but talked to them anyway. After receiving a highly lucrative offer, one that was more than he asked for, he went to work for them. The beginning days were fun: kegs and foosball on Fridays but once the start-up was bought out all of that changed. Soon it was meetings and minutes. Within a year, Michael left with a healthy severance package. About the same time, his father's battle with congestive heart failure took a turn for the worse. Eventually his dad lost that battle and died. Seven months later, Michael's mom passed away from a combination of a broken heart over the loss of her husband and a rare kidney disorder. Losing his father was incredibly sad, but not surprising as he had been battling for 4 years. But the passing of Michael's mom was unexpected and heartbreaking. Emotionally, Michael was devastated. Financially, he was devastated. His parents' illnesses ate up his 401(k), he lost his home, his cars, his savings, all of it. It was a tremendous burden to bear and in his own words, he simply "muddled" through it. It wasn't until he was sitting on the couch of a billionaire friend over a year later that he realized he hadn't mourned. He was simply in survival mode. His friend's acknowledgment of this gave him the space to grieve. Soon he set off on a journey to take his parents' ashes to Europe and give them the trip he had always wanted to give them when they were alive. For four months he traveled and lived in Italy, Belgium, France among other places. And when he returned to the States, he was still dead broke but he was sure of one thing: never again would he be tied to a job or to clients to make a living. He read a series of books, which he now calls the Sexy Six, that opened his eyes to a new way of living and doing business. He found a network marketing company he believed in, a company that became a new family for him and he quickly built a successful business with them through his own proven social media tactics. From that success, he developed a course on social media to teach other network marketers and solopreneurs how to do the same. That course led to a gig producing the popular podcast, The Kick-Ass Life with David Wood. And that podcast led to Michael's own show, The Solopreneur Hour. Today he is the head honcho at The Solopreneur Hour, a podcast that produces a six-figure income for him and has grown to over 1.5 million downloads in its first year. On the show, he interviews successful solopreneurs on what they did from the time they became unemployable to their present day success. I've appeared on the show as has Michael Gerber, Pat Flynn, Chris Ducker and numerous others. Michael and I get into tons more valuable content on what it means to be a solopreneur, the steps he recommends someone take to get started and why taking action is so important. He was a great guest and I enjoyed having him on the show, I hope you dig this episode too. Thanks for listening and we'll see you next time. THANKS MICHAEL! If you enjoyed this session of the Art of Charm Podcast, let Michael know by clicking on the link below and sending him a quick shout out on Twitter: Click here to thank Michael on Twitter! Resources from this episode: Michael's podcastThe Eight Steps To Becoming A Successful Solopreneur Michael on TwitterRich Dad, Poor Dad Cashflow Quadrant The 4-Hour Work Week The E-Myth Revisited Strengths Finder 2.0 Crush ItWhen Harry Met Sally: The Diner Scene You'll also like: -The Art of Charm Toolbox -Best of The Art of Charm Podcast HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dug this episode, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from all the fluff out there. FEEDBACK + PROMOTION Hit us up with your comments and guest suggestions. We read EVERYTHING. Email jordanh@theartofcharm.com Give us a call at 888.413.7177 Stay Charming!

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309: Adam Gilbert | Psychology of Change Sep 03, 2014

Show notes

"Unless you're actually on Jeopardy, knowledge without action is useless!" - Adam Gilbert The Cheat Sheet: What's the top reason people fear losing weight? Why awareness is the key to making lasting changes. The broccoli test: what it is and how to use it. The most common roadblocks Adam sees. How to use discomfort as your compass. Why you need a coach and it's amateur to think you don't. And so much more... Have you ever tried to lose weight, stop drinking, start a business and a new exercise program at the same time? Did you fail and wonder why? Health and fitness psychology expert, Adam Gilbert, would say you took on too much at one time. There's a psychology to making changes that last and Adam is here to give us the golden nuggets on that very topic. Join us for episode 309 as we talk about the psychology of weight loss, why you sabotage yourself and others do too, why discomfort is the perfect compass and the most common roadblocks he sees with his clients. More About This Show: Adam Gilbert has always been fascinated by the topics of health, fitness, nutrition and psychology. And since 2007 he has made those areas his life's work. He helps people make changes in their health and fitness by understanding what's holding them back psychologically. Inherently, most of us know there is no magic pill or quick-fix to getting healthy and we know we have to eat right, exercise and take care of ourselves to be as healthy as we can be. Adam helps us understand what's in the way, psychologically, to doing so. On the topic of weight loss, Adam believes there are a lot of psychological factors at work. Is someone afraid of losing weight because they won't fit in with their friends any more? Or perhaps their spouse or significant other doesn't support them in getting fit - their partner sabotages their weight loss efforts by making meals that don't fit their diet plan. All of those examples have an underlying psychology to them that applies not just to weight loss, but to any area of our lives we're improving. And that psychology is fear of rejection, and fear of success. We may sabotage our efforts in an area because we don't want to lose the friendships and the partner we're comfortable with; we don't want them to reject our new "selves" so we make changes, but don't stick with them. Adam and I discuss the specific ways to navigate these situations so we can actually be okay with making changes, being uncomfortable and helping others while we're in the process of growing and shifting. One of the most pivotal keys to doing so that Adam and I talk about is awareness. When you're aware of what's happening, you can better navigate any change. We also dive into the related area of discomfort and how to use it as our compass. Adam believes if we truly want to become the person of our dreams, whether it's a healthy awesome body or the ideal relationship or our perfect job or business, we have to use discomfort to guide us to get there. If we continue to do what's comfortable, we'll continue to stay where we are. So in order to steer us into that new body, relationship, job or business, we have to do what's uncomfortable. There's so much more Adam and I discuss but one of the biggest takeaways we both want you to get is this: you must take action on this knowledge. All the tricks, tips and tools we give you are pointless until you implement them. So listen to this show, get yourself a coach or accountability partner to help you and then take action! Adam was a terrific guest and I enjoyed having him on the show, I hope you enjoy this episode as well. Be sure to check out the gift he's giving all of you, you'll find it in the Resources section below. Thanks for listening and we'll see you next time. THANKS ADAM! If you enjoyed this session of the Art of Charm Podcast, let Adam know by clicking on the link below and sending him a quick shout out on Twitter: Click here to thank Adam on Twitter! Resources from this episode: Adam's web siteAdam's gift to all of you Adam on TwitterParadox of Choice, hard copy You'll also like: -The Art of Charm Toolbox -Best of The Art of Charm Podcast HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dug this episode, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from all the fluff out there. FEEDBACK + PROMOTION Hit us up with your comments and guest suggestions. We read EVERYTHING. Email jordanh@theartofcharm.com Give us a call at 888.413.7177 Stay Charming!

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308: Susan RoAne | How to Work a Room Sep 01, 2014

Show notes

"If we listen, we always know what to say next." - Susan RoAne The Cheat Sheet: Your number one purpose at any event. Why drinks aren't really free at an open bar. How to remember people when you meet them. Why it's important to never burn bridges, Susan gives a personal lesson. #1 tactic to create your own luck. How to introduce yourself, even if you're shy. And so much more... Networking. It is one of the most coveted skills someone can possess; it can open doors where they were previously closed, it can create opportunities where there previously were none. One of the most informative experts on this topic is Susan RoAne. She's the author of How To Work A Room, now on its 4th edition and silver anniversary. She joins the Art of Charm podcast for our 308th episode to dish the details on the ins and outs of networking and connecting, even if you're shy. She's got advice, techniques and tips for everyone in any industry. More About This Show: Considered one of the leading experts in the field of networking, Susan RoAne has seen her share of the good, the bad and the ugly when it comes to networking. And some of her favorite advice to give people is simple: you never know. You never know who someone is, who is in their network and what doors they are connected to - so always be nice to everyone. Because you never know. One of the reasons the topic of networking, and her book, have been so important and continue to be so important, is because everyone needs to network. The details may change from generation to generation, but the rules generally don't. If you want to be a good networker, always be nice to others and treat other people like you're a host. Why act like you're a host? Because hosts listen and make their guests feel welcome, and at home. That's what you should be doing when you network: make others feel comfortable in your presence. Stop worrying about, or even having an agenda when you go somewhere. Go there to have fun, be lively and connect with people...not to get someone or get something for yourself or your business. Susan says that is the essence of networking. In this episode, Susan gives us some nuts and bolts on how to prepare for an event, how to engage with people (even if you're shy) and how to really work a room. To prepare she says to go online and research the people who may be there. Find their LinkedIn profile and study it, as well as their Facebook page. Look for what you have in common with them outside of the business realm. Then when you meet them, work it into a conversation. Are you both recovering lawyers? Say so. Did you both go to the same college or grow up in the same part of the country? Say so. When it comes to engaging with people, Susan has three suggestions for starting a conversation: introduce yourself in under 10 seconds with a pleasantry, say something about the event and then give the benefit of what you do (not what you do precisely). Keep it short, sweet and to the point. To really work the room, even if you're a shy person, get there on time or within 15 minutes of the event starting. That way the room works YOU, not the other way around! As people arrive, you'll be able to mingle and mix on a more intimate basis. Susan and I really get into the finer details of networking in this episode! We talk about how to exit a conversation graciously (and it's not by saying you have to use the bathroom!), how to follow up and make yourself stand out in that follow up, and how to remember the people you meet. And here's plenty more where that came from! Susan was a terrific guest and I enjoyed having her on the show; be sure to get out your notepad or your Evernote and write her tips down so you can take action the next time you're at a networking event. THANKS SUSAN! If you enjoyed this session of the Art of Charm Podcast, let Susan know by clicking on the link below and sending her a quick shout out on Twitter: Click here to thank Susan on Twitter! Resources from this episode: Susan's web siteHow To Work A Room, hard copyHow To Work A Room, audio version Susan on Twitter You'll also like: -The Art of Charm Toolbox -Best of The Art of Charm Podcast HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dug this episode, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from all the fluff out there. FEEDBACK + PROMOTION Hit us up with your comments and guest suggestions. We read EVERYTHING. Email jordanh@theartofcharm.com Give us a call at 888.413.7177 Stay Charming!

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307: Pat Flynn | Smart Passive Income Aug 29, 2014

Show notes

"We can't control what happens to us, but we can control how we feel, how we react and what we do." - Pat Flynn The Cheat Sheet: Why it's important to him to fail on his own terms. The best way to find potential income opportunities. The most important question to ask any business owner, and what to do with their answer. What a bucket of crabs teaches us about life, according to Pat. One of the biggest challenges entrepreneurs face is a lack of ideas: true or false? What is "just in time learning" and how does Pat use it? And so much more... One of the greatest challenges a man can face is experiencing a setback and turning it into an asset that actually improves his life. Someone who has done just that is Pat Flynn of Smart Passive Income, our guest for episode 307. Pat is the man in charge of SPI, a brand devoted to sharing with people how he's created smart, passive income streams. And it all began when his Plan A fell through. In this show, we talk about how Pat has overcome adversity throughout his career, how he has found the courage to overcome challenges and how he has become efficient and effective at work to create a better balance between work and the rest of his life. More About This Show: From a fairly early age, Pat had his career path mapped out. He got excellent grades throughout every level of schooling, including architecture school. He put in the long hours necessary to be one of the top students in his class at architecture school and did whatever needed to be done to put himself among the very best. So when he landed a job with an architecture firm and began the process of becoming a licensed architect, he thought he was well on his way. And for three years his life went exactly the way he had planned. But one day his firm dropped a bomb: they were letting people go and he was one of them. The timing could not have been worse for Pat; he had just gotten engaged to his now-wife and they were planning their wedding. He had no Plan B and had no idea what to do next. It was then that he learned how valuable it is to have supportive people in his life. His wife and family encouraged him and believed him. They all told him he'd get through this experience, and be better for it. Pat listened to them and took advantage of the few months he had between receiving news of his layoff and actually being unemployed to look for opportunities. He found one in particular that led to the creation of his LEED exam preparation guide. The LEED exam is a common certification for architects to take that helps them land better jobs. Pat had built a site while preparing to take his LEED exam and he had created a resource where people asked him questions about the test. He responded and provided valuable information for everyone who visited. He took those questions and answers and created an online ebook based on that information.Because of all the time and energy Pat had put into his site and his community in its early stages, his guidebook was a massive success early on. It showed Pat the power of online marketing and propelled him on his current path of entrepreneurship. Since then, Pat has become known as one of the most transparent business men on the planet (even Forbes said so) and he shows why in this episode. We talk at length about some of the tools he's learned to balance his work life with his home life so he's fully present in whatever he's doing. He also shares his shoebox trick for staying grateful and a few practical ways to spot opportunities and then act on them. Pat was a terrific guest and I enjoyed having him on the show. And I really appreciated the advice he gave about becoming more efficient with email and how to let go of that responsibility. Of course, there's plenty more Pat and I discuss on this show so have a listen and enjoy! THANKS PAT! If you enjoyed this session of the Art of Charm Podcast, let Pat know by clicking on the link below and sending him a quick shout out on Twitter: Click here to thank Pat on Twitter! Resources from this episode: Pat's personal web siteSmart Passive IncomeDane Maxwell on the Smart Passive Income podcast Pat on Twitter You'll also like: -The Art of Charm Toolbox -Best of The Art of Charm Podcast HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dug this episode, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from all the fluff out there. FEEDBACK + PROMOTION Hit us up with your comments and guest suggestions. We read EVERYTHING. Email jordanh@theartofcharm.com Give us a call at 888.413.7177 Stay Charming!

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