The Art of Charm

Latest Episodes:

521: Jocko Willink | Extreme Ownership Jun 14, 2016

Show notes

Jocko Willink (@jockowillink), commander for the most highly decorated special operations unit of the Iraq War, joins the show to talk about taking responsibility, discipline, intensity, and leadership to the next level as outlined in Extreme Ownership: How U.S. Navy SEALs Lead and Win. The Cheat Sheet: When making a decision, worrying about variables that can't be controlled is a waste of time. A better outcome is likely if we learn to focus otherwise wasted effort on factors that can be controlled. Understand why taking ownership of your mistakes, personal issues, and outcomes always gets better results than trying to pass blame to someone else. What does discipline = freedom mean? How do you stop small weaknesses that sometimes permeate discipline from having a negative impact on significant decisions? Is there such a thing as a natural leader? And so much more... Show notes at http://theartofcharm.com/podcast-episodes/jocko-willink-extreme-ownership-episode-521/ HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming!

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Minisode Monday #5 | Testing Our Assumptions Jun 13, 2016

Show notes

Welcome to the fifth episode of Minisode Monday, where we'll talk about testing our assumptions! We keep finding so many useful tactics and tips that we want to share with you, but they don't fit into the format of a regular show -- hence, Minisode Monday. Here's what's up today: The Cheat Sheet: Give someone who remembers WWII an iPod or comparable modern media player and they may not be able to wrap their brains around how it can store so much music and other content. Maybe because they used to have a record collection that took up half the basement, they have assumptions about how much space it takes to store that much media based on past experience that haven't been updated to account for modern, unfamiliar technology. No matter our age, we all carry around assumptions -- right or wrong -- about the way the world works. As we get older and the world changes around us, many of our assumptions naturally become archaic. But how many of our assumptions are fact-based or purely opinion? It's our programming that causes us to make these assumptions before our conscious mind can intercept them -- not just with technology, but with people, too. This week, whenever you catch yourself making assumptions about something or someone, put it to the test: is the guy at the deli with all the tattoos really a scary person? Is the movie theater ticket clerk really just an aloof teenager? Did someone snub you on purpose, or are they maybe distracted with their own issues? Some of the programming that triggers these assumptions may need rewiring -- and if you're ready to make that happen, here's a good place to start. Let us know about how you put today's Minisode Monday into practice! Leave a comment below, tweet with @TheArtofCharm in your response, or email jordan@theartofcharm.com (he reads everything)! Show notes at http://theartofcharm.com/podcast-episodes/minisode-monday-5-testing-our-assumptions/ HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming!

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Fan Mail Friday #66 | Unfriending In Real Life Jun 10, 2016

Show notes

Time for Fan Mail Friday, where we'll be answering your questions and dropping some knowledge and feedback to help you kick the weekend off right. Let's cut to it! In this episode: If a partner is going through therapy and the 12 steps for recovery from alcoholism -- and doing well -- is it reasonable to worry they might have a relapse because of their "proven" addictive personality? What causes someone not to take an opportunity -- even when they have an offer that would vastly improve their lives sitting right in front of them? A listener writes in to give us more great ways for long-distance couples to stay connected. Would you rather get a direct but short reply from a busy person, or a longer reply from someone who's been outsourced to answer that busy person's mail? As painful as breaking up with a romantic partner may be, it at least has social precedents to follow. But how do you break up with a friend -- or nip a one-sided friendship in the bud? (Check out our recent episode with Sam Harris for some insight into dealing with difficult truths over intellectual dishonesty. Foreign language hacks are a dime a dozen. So here's a triple foreign language hack that might help you learn a new language while putting those idle hours you spend on Facebook to good use. Have any questions, comments, or stories you'd like to share with us? Drop us a line at friday@theartofcharm.com! Show notes at http://theartofcharm.com/podcast-episodes/fan-mail-friday-66-unfriending-in-real-life/ HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming!

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520: Hines Ward | Do the Dirty Work Jun 09, 2016

Show notes

Hines Ward (@mvp86hinesward) is a two-time Super Bowl champion and MVP of Super Bowl XL. He joins us to talk about how, in spite of just turning 40, he's just getting started. The Cheat Sheet: Hard work beats talent when talent doesn't work hard. By carving out his own niche in the game of football, Hines Ward proved he didn't have to be the tallest and fastest in the NFL to excel. How can someone in the spotlight stay positive even when faced with bouts of external negativity? In preparation for life post-game, Hines explains how he networked instead of playing Xbox all day like some of his contemporaries. What theme song "inspired" Hines during the swimming part of his Ironman triathlon? And so much more... Show notes at http://theartofcharm.com/podcast-episodes/hines-ward-do-the-dirty-work-episode-520/ HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming!

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519: Ryan Holiday | Ego Is the Enemy Jun 07, 2016

Show notes

Ryan Holiday (@ryanholiday), author of Ego Is the Enemy, talks about how learning to put our higher goals above a desire for recognition leads us to true accomplishment. The Cheat Sheet: What is the ego? When does the ego go from being a fundamental part of our existence to an all-destroying enemy? What are the downfalls of ego (and how can we avoid them)? Learn how aspiration, success, and failure are influenced by ego. Understand the delicate relationship between ego and envy. And so much more... Show notes at http://theartofcharm.com/podcast-episodes/ryan-holiday-ego-is-the-enemy-episode-519/ HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming!

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Minisode Monday #4 | Never Too Late to Be Grateful Jun 06, 2016

Show notes

Welcome to the fourth episode of Minisode Monday! We keep finding so many useful tactics and tips that we want to share with you, but they don't fit into the format of a regular show -- hence, Minisode Monday. The Cheat Sheet: Off the top of your head, think of something for which you're grateful. It can be anything -- from a passion for teaching others to having a strong circle of friends to having a good job to loving where you live. Anything. In what ways does this thing for which you're grateful make your life better? Now think back to when and how you came upon whatever makes you grateful. Chances are pretty good another person was responsible for bringing the object of this gratefulness into your life. No matter how long ago this happened, track down and thank that person (thanks to social media like Facebook, it's easier than ever to do this). Let them know how grateful you are for this thing, but more important: how grateful you are to them for introducing you to it. Remember: it's never too late to be grateful. Let us know about how you put today's Minisode Monday into practice! Leave a comment below, tweet with @TheArtofCharm in your response, or email jordan@theartofcharm.com (he reads everything)! Show notes at http://theartofcharm.com/podcast-episodes/minisode-monday-4-never-too-late-to-be-grateful/ HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming!

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Fan Mail Friday #65 | Sex and the Single Superhero Jun 03, 2016

Show notes

Time for Fan Mail Friday, where we'll be answering your questions and dropping some knowledge and feedback to help you kick the weekend off right. Kimberly Seltzer (as featured in our Toolbox for Women episodes) joins us for this one, so let's cut to it! In this episode: Dating when you've been diagnosed with herpes can be tough. When is the time right to tell prospective partners? Too early, and you may be seen as presumptuous. But if you wait until things start getting serious, they may be angry you didn't tell them sooner. How do you make the call? A listener from Jordan's appearance on the Sex Nerd Sandra podcast writes in to ask for an alternative to the "just be yourself" advice usually given to someone who wants to approach an attractive stranger. If you're used to being a pushover, what do you do when your so-called friends resist the boundaries you're trying to set (as discussed with Kimberly Seltzer in episode 499)? Sometimes love is unrequited for good reason. But what do you do when "the one who got away" briefly returns the sentiment only to go right back to their abusive spouse? Are you right to feel like the perpetual second choice? A stunning superhero asks: "Is it possible to be too attractive?" Have any questions, comments, or stories you'd like to share with us? Drop us a line at friday@theartofcharm.com! Show notes at http://theartofcharm.com/podcast-episodes/fan-mail-friday-65-sex-and-the-single-superhero/ HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming!

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518: Raj Raghunathan | If You're so Smart, Why Aren't You Happy? Jun 02, 2016

Show notes

Raj Raghunathan (@Rajadon), author of If You're so Smart, Why Aren't You Happy?, examines why happiness often eludes us in all walks of life -- no matter how healthy, wealthy, or wise we seem to others. The Cheat Sheet: The very things that make people smart and successful can, paradoxically, get in the way of happiness. The typical education, no matter how extensive (or expensive), doesn't give us instructions for how to be happy. Are millennials naturally better equipped for happiness than elder generations? Being mindful intensifies positive feelings even as it mitigates negative ones. What's the recipe for your happiness? And so much more... Show notes at http://theartofcharm.com/podcast-episodes/raj-raghunathan-youre-smart-arent-happy-episode-518/ HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming!

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517: Adam Grant | Originals Move the World May 31, 2016

Show notes

Adam Grant (@AdamMGrant), author of Originals: How Non-Conformists Move the World, revisits the show to explain how defying conformity gives us the power to change the world instead of just accepting it as it is. The Cheat Sheet: Great creators don't necessarily have the deepest level of expertise. Question the default instead of taking the status quo for granted. Learn how to triple the number of ideas you generate. Procrastinate strategically. Balance your risk portfolio. And so much more... Show notes at http://theartofcharm.com/podcast-episodes/adam-grant-originals-move-world-episode-517/ HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming!

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Minisode Monday #3 | Nonverbal Communication for Travelers May 30, 2016

Show notes

Welcome to the third episode of Minisode Monday! We keep finding so many useful tactics and tips that we want to share with you, but they don't fit into the format of a regular show -- hence, Minisode Monday. The Cheat Sheet: When you're traveling around the world, communication can get tricky. You may not have time to master multiple foreign languages, but you can brush up on your nonverbal communication skills before catching a ride to the airport. While cultural differences are inevitable, many nonverbal cues are universal. For instance, you can convey confidence and charisma by the way you carry yourself -- in any country. When you get good at observing the nonverbal cues of others in front of you, your communication will be that much better by the time you reach the verbal part of the conversation. If observation is your friend, a partner who can practice with you, observe your nonverbal cues, and give you honest feedback for improvement is perhaps your best friend. Try to observe nonverbal communication going on between people around you in the week ahead. What do you find yourself noticing for the first time? Let us know about how you put today's Minisode Monday into practice! Leave a comment below, tweet with @TheArtofCharm in your response, or write to Jordan directly (he reads everything)! Show notes at http://theartofcharm.com/podcast-episodes/minisode-monday-3-nonverbal-communication-for-travelers/ HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming!

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