The Art of Charm

Latest Episodes:

Elite Communication Tips To Take Your Influence From Ordinary to Extraordinary Aug 14, 2023

Show notes

The Art of Charm is brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com/charm today to get 10% off your first month.

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In today’s episode, we cover influence with Jonah Berger, Zoe Chance, and Vanessa Bohns. Jonah Berger is a professor at the Wharton School at the University of Pennsylvania, a best selling author, and world expert in social influence and consumer behavior. Zoe Chance is a professor at Yale School of Management and a researcher, speaker and consultant who specializes in persuasion, influence and behavioral economics. Vanessa Bonds is a social psychologist and professor at Cornell University, and her research focuses on how people make judgments and decisions in social contexts.

Humans are social creatures so we are always influencing others and being influenced by others, but how does influence work, how do you protect yourself from being influenced by others, and what can you do to become more influential?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
How do others influence you without you being aware of it?
What is the most common mistake we make when trying to influence the people around us and what should you do to avoid making the same mistake?

The 3 layers of listening required for influence – 9:02
Why do you need to listen to others in order to influence them?
What 3 things do you need to listen for so the other person knows you understand them and thus is more susceptible to your influence?

One simple change to boost your influence – 15:07
What one word will amplify your ability to influence the person you’re talking to?
What common mistake do people make when speaking that makes others less likely to respect what they have to say?

Power of the pause – 31:20
Why is silence in conversation so impactful and how can you use it to your advantage?

The number one reason you don’t try – 33:42
How do you reframe rejection so you can embrace it and grow from it rather than avoid it and stop yourself from achieving your goals?
What’s the best way to reject someone so you don’t hurt the person’s feelings?

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Master Change With These 4 Ps | Brad Stulberg Aug 07, 2023

Show notes

The Art of Charm is brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com/charm today to get 10% off your first month.

Nom Nom delivers fresh dog food with every portion personalized to your dog’s needs, so you can bring out their best. Get 50% off your first two weeks at tryNom.com/artofcharm.

In today’s episode, we cover how to master change with Brad Stulberg. Brad regularly contributes to the New York Times and his work has been featured in the Wall Street Journal and the Atlantic, and he is the bestselling author of Peak Performance, The Passion Paradox, The Practice of Groundedness, and his newest: Master of Change: How to Excel When Everything Is Changing – Including You.

Change can rock your world when you’re not prepared for it, so what can you do to become more resilient to change, how do you develop rugged flexibility, and what role does change play in our relationships?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
How many major changes will you encounter in life and how do you prepare for them?
How can you embrace change and use it to grow?
What steps can we take to find balance in our own lives during times of change?

Rugged Flexibility – 13:25
What is rugged flexibility, why do you need it, and how do you build it in your life?

How to be resilient to change – 23:45
What are the two requirements to be resilient to change?
How do you whittle down a list of values to your 3-5 core values and what impact can living in alignment with your core values have on your overall well-being?

Control vs Expectations – 38:03
How do you balance the control you have over a situation with the expectations you have?
How do you handle relationships with people who change in different ways from you?
How do you set expectations with friendships to make your friends feel like they can always come to you?

The 4-P framework to handle change – 57:58
What is the 4-P framework and how can you use it to handle any change you encounter in life?

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How Expectations Keep You Stuck | David Robson Jul 31, 2023

Show notes

The Art of Charm is brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com/charm today to get 10% off your first month.

Nom Nom delivers fresh dog food with every portion personalized to your dog’s needs, so you can bring out their best. Get 50% off your first two weeks at tryNom.com/artofcharm.

In today’s episode, we cover the expectation effect with David Robson. David is an award winning writer who specializes in psychology and neuroscience, and is the author of The Intelligence Trap: Why Smart People Make Dumb Mistakes, and his most recent book, The Expectation Effect: How Your Mind Can Change Your World.

Your expectations can mean the difference between failure and success, but why do your expectations have such a drastic impact, how can you reframe your expectations to achieve success whenever possible, and how do you use visualization techniques to boost your performance in any area overnight?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What is the expectation effect and why do your expectations impact everything you do?

Reframe expectations to reach your goals – 10:47
How can you reframe your expectations to enjoy working out and achieve the body you’ve always wanted?
Why is it important for you to feel stress and how do you know what too much stress is?
What can you do to reframe expectations to be comfortable with public speaking?

Visualization and Performance – 26:22
What visualization technique can you use to increase your strength by 10% and recover from injury faster?
How do you use visualization to decrease your stress and anxiety?
How do the expectations of people around you affect your performance and what can you do to decrease their impact?

Do not do this if you want to be happy – 40:10
What do you need to avoid doing if you want to maximize your happiness and minimize your daily suffering?
How can you use science to increase your willpower?
How can you harness the science of expectations to build the top performing routine that will reach any goal you set for yourself?
How do you reframe frustration to help you grow?

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The Secret to Finding Your Tribe Through Culture| Marcus Collins Jul 24, 2023

Show notes

The Art of Charm is brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com/charm today to get 10% off your first month.

Nom Nom delivers fresh dog food with every portion personalized to your

dog’s needs, so you can bring out their best. Get 50% off your first two weeks at tryNom.com/artofcharm.

In today’s episode, we cover culture with Dr Marcus Collins. Marcus is an award-winning marketer and cultural translator, the head of strategy at Wieden+Kennedy New York, a clinical assistant professor of marketing at the Ross School of Business, University of Michigan, and the author of For the Culture: The Power Behind What We Buy, What We Do, and Who We Want to Be.

Introduction

Culture is as much a part of everyday life as the air we breathe, but how do we define what a culture is, what is the secret that marketers use to tap into culture and motivate you to take action, and how do you build your own culture (or find a new one)?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What does the word culture mean and why is culture so important to us?
What are the three systems that make up culture?

Fast Culture vs Slow Culture – 15:15
Why do certain aspects of culture move faster than others and how do they influence each other?
Why is it taboo to talk openly about politics, religion, and money?

Role Theory – 30:11
What is role theory and how is it embedded in every culture?
What is the difference between cultural appropriation and cultural appreciation?

How do you turn a trend into a cultural phenomenon – 45:28
What is a cultural contagion and what two factors determine whether something becomes an official part of a culture?
If you’re not part of a culture, how do you understand a culture to appreciate it and understand where members of that culture are coming from?

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What is Charisma and How to Become Charismatic in 3 Steps | Toolbox Jul 17, 2023

Show notes

The Art of Charm is brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com/charm today to get 10% off your first month.

Nom Nom delivers fresh dog food with every portion personalized to your dog’s needs, so you can bring out their best. Get 50% off your first two weeks at tryNom.com/artofcharm.

In today’s episode, we cover how to grow your charisma with AJ, Johnny, and Coach Michael Herold.

Charismatic people can light up a room and make everyone want to be around them, but what even is charisma, how does your charisma impact your career and relationships for better or worse, and what can you do to unlock your inner charisma to be more memorable and interesting?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What 3 skill sets do you need to work on to develop your charisma?

How to Grow Your Charisma – 10:50
How do you practice being more present so people feel like you are not ignoring or dismissing them?
What can you do to develop your empathy so people don’t feel judged by you and pushed away?
How do you be more enthusiastic so people don’t think you’re boring?

Emotional Climate – 25:00
What emotional climate are you creating around people and how do you make a fun, positive, inviting emotional climate that makes people want to spend more time with you?
Why is pessimism detrimental to your charisma and how can you become optimistic?

Confidence – 36:02
How do you exude confidence that draws people in everytime you walk into the room?
Why is vulnerability key to showing confidence?

Curious how to practice presence, empathy and enthusiasm in your own conversations? Take a look inside the X-Factor Accelerator, the Art of Charm coaching program: https://join.theartofcharm.com/xfa?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=show_notes&utm_campaign=xfa-podcast&utm_content=2023-07-17-what-is-charisma-and-how-to-become-charismatic-in

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Don’t Get Fooled: How Con Artists Gain Your Trust | Chris Chabris Jul 10, 2023

Show notes

The Art of Charm is brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com/charm today to get 10% off your first month.

Nom Nom delivers fresh dog food with every portion personalized to your

dog’s needs, so you can bring out their best. Get 50% off your first two weeks at tryNom.com/artofcharm.

In today’s episode, we cover deception and fraud with Chris Chabris. Chris is a research psychologist, Senior Investigator at Geisinger Health System, visiting fellow at the Institute for Advanced Study, and associate professor of Psychology and co-director of the Neuroscience Program at Union College in New York.

Scammers and con men are everywhere these days, but how can you recognize when you’re being scammed, what behaviors or habits of your own should be aware of that tip you off as a potential victim, and what tactics do scammers, businesses, and governments use on us to get what they want?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
Why are people fascinated by conmen and scammers?
How did AJ get scammed in Thailand and what can you learn to avoid being scammed anywhere?

How scammers choose their targets – 13:44
What 4 key cognitive habits do scammers exploit in their targets and how can you stop them from exploiting those habits in you?

How we help scammers to scam us – 33:50
What do we unconsciously do to help people deceive us?
How do people get away with large scale fraud and deception?
What are the 4 hooks that businesses and governments use to deceive us?

The weapons of scammers – 52:30
How do scammers and con men use words and memories against us?
How does your memory deceive you every time you try to remember something?

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How To Read Body Language Like An FBI Agent Jul 03, 2023

Show notes

The Art of Charm is brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com/charm today to get 10% off your first month.

Nom Nom delivers fresh dog food with every portion personalized to your

dog’s needs, so you can bring out their best. Get 50% off your first two weeks at tryNom.com/artofcharm.

In today’s episode, we cover body language with former FBI agents Jack Schafer and Joe Navarro, trust and body language expert Abbie Maroño, and CEO of The Behavior Company Anne Maartje Oud, some of the leading experts in body language.

We all possess the ability to read body language before we can form words, but in today’s world we seem to disregard this incredible ability early on, so what happened, why is it more important than ever, and what can you do to quickly relearn this invaluable skill?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00

Why we (now) suck at reading body language – 3:01
How did we get so bad at reading body language in the west when we’re born with this ability?
What is the only thing you can do to change a first impression?
How do you build trust rapidly and effectively?

What makes sincere human connection – 11:22
What are the 3 components you need to build a sincere human connection?

FBI advice for introverts – 23:01
When approaching a group of people, how do you know who is easiest to talk to?
How do you know if you’re making someone uncomfortable and what can you do to make the other person comfortable?

Body language myths – 31:25
What are the biggest misconceptions people have about body language?

Curious what it looks like to practice reading body language in real conversations? Take a look inside the X-Factor Accelerator, the Art of Charm coaching program: https://join.theartofcharm.com/xfa?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=show_notes&utm_campaign=xfa-podcast&utm_content=2023-07-03-how-to-read-body-language-like-an-fbi-agent

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Talk To Anyone Anywhere. Breaking The Ice (Toolbox) Jun 26, 2023

Show notes

The Art of Charm is brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com/charm today to get 10% off your first month.

Nom Nom delivers fresh dog food with every portion personalized to your

dog’s needs, so you can bring out their best. Get 50% off your first two weeks at tryNom.com/artofcharm.

In today’s episode, we cover breaking the ice with AJ, Johnny, and Coach Michael.

Taking the first step is often the hardest, so when it comes to breaking the ice what is the most effective way to strike up a conversation, what mindset can you cultivate that will make conversations flow effortlessly, and what can you do to become unforgettable in the eyes of people you meet?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
How do you start conversations with strangers without coming off as awkward?

The Conversation Formula – 7:50
What are some examples of simple questions to ask in social, romantic, or professional environments to start a conversation?
Why is it important to focus on "we" moments in conversations rather than just talking about yourself?
What questions should you avoid in conversation?

What Should You Say Next – 21:24
Why should you avoid asking questions over and over again, and what should you say after someone answers your question?
If curiosity is the key to great conversations, how do you cultivate your own curiosity so conversations don’t feel awkward and forced?
What topics should you avoid when talking to someone new?

Become Unforgettable – 27:57
How do you create a positive, memorable impression so people never forget you and look forward to spending time with you?
What exercise can you use in a conversation to create a stronger bond with anyone?

With all of these tips in mind, it's important to remember that building meaningful relationships still takes time and effort. It's not a one-time event; rather, it's an ongoing process that grows with each new connection. Working on developing meaningful relationships may bring success in the professional or personal goals desired. Nevertheless, it also requires a commitment to get out of your comfort zone, acknowledge different points of view, listen more than you talk, and ask thoughtful questions about the person and what they stand for. Ultimately, when we put care into connecting to others on a more focused level and look beyond our surface interests or intentions, we can create stronger connections that have a lasting impact on our lives.

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How To Journal Your Way To Massive Transformation | Ceri Samvilian Jun 19, 2023

Show notes

The Art of Charm is brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com/charm today to get 10% off your first month.

Nom Nom delivers fresh dog food with every portion personalized to your

dog’s needs, so you can bring out their best. Get 50% off your first two weeks at tryNom.com/artofcharm.

In today’s episode, we cover journaling with Ceri Samvilian. Ceri is an expert on journaling, a certified life coach, author of Journal and discover your authentic self, and speaker with 20 years of experience in human resources.

The most important relationship you can have in life is with yourself, but how do you use journaling to nurture and strengthen that relationship, what simple journal prompt can you use to defeat overthinking, and when is it more important to journal so you are better capable of handling the inevitable tough times in life?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
If you’re feeling stuck in life, what can you do today to get unstuck and start building unstoppable momentum?
How can you use journaling to figure out who your authentic self is?

The Principles of Effective Journaling – 19:45
How do you start journaling?
What questions can you ask yourself to make journaling productive?
How can journaling help individuals become more self-aware?

Who should journal? – 30:50
Why do men need to journal?
When is it more important to journal?
What questions can you ask yourself to improve your journaling practice and make it more enjoyable?

The one thing all humans need in order to be happy? – 47:20
How does journaling help you find the one thing you need in order to be happy?
How do the “masks” we wear prevent us from achieving our dreams?
How do you identify the masks you wear around different people so you can understand where your road blocks are between you and your potential?

Journaling is a powerful practice that helps bring clarity and understanding to even the most confusing of inner voices. It just takes a few simple steps to start living an empowered life, starting with choosing a pen, grabbing a notebook or opening an app, and selecting a prompt that works for you. Although self-development is often a bumpy road, Ceri's journal can help you navigate it more easily and string those bumps together into mountains of success and joy for your future. Don’t let the intimidating thought of taking that first step prevent you from reaping its rewards. You deserve to be authentic, so set aside some time today for self-reflection and overthinking prevention—start journaling now!

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Effective Communication Tools For Top Tier Leadership | Brett Crozier Jun 12, 2023

Show notes

The Art of Charm is brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com/charm today to get 10% off your first month.

Nom Nom delivers fresh dog food with every portion personalized to your

dog’s needs, so you can bring out their best. Get 50% off your first two weeks at tryNom.com/artofcharm.

In today’s episode, we cover leadership, relationship building, and feedback with Brett Crozier. Brett graduated from the United States Naval Academy, served as the Commanding Officer of a combat F/A-18 strike fighter squadron, the world’s largest and most advanced communications ship USS Blue Ridge, and the aircraft carrier USS Theodore Roosevelt before retiring from the Navy in 2022. Brett is the author of Surf When You Can: Lessons in Life, Loyalty, and Leadership from a Maverick Navy Captain.

On this episode of The Art of Charm, we interview Brett Crozier, retired Captain of the US Navy and former Commanding Officer of the USS Roosevelt. We dive into the importance of teamwork and leadership in implementing successful missions and running a floating city. Brett shares his experiences launching fighter jets and navigating the challenges of COVID-19 on the Roosevelt. He also provides valuable insights on building relationships and feedback mechanisms as a leader.

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
Why has surfing always been important to Brett?
What goals did Brett have when he first entered the Naval Academy?
How did Brett’s fighter pilot experience influence his leadership abilities?

Building Trust Cross Culturally – 10:08
How do you build trust with someone from a different culture?
Why are sports important to building relationships in structures of hierarchy?

Relying on Instincts When Training isn’t Enough – 23:47
What do you do when you encounter a situation that wasn’t covered in class or training?
How do you make sure you get quality feedback from the people who matter?
What two traits do you need to develop to be an effective leader?

Navy Captain Sends Email, Gets Fired – 37:55
Why did Brett Crozier lose his position as Captain of an aircraft carrier when COVID started?

Leadership is more than simply a position of authority; it's an opportunity to build relationships, bridge divides, and promote safe and healthy practices. From this discussion we can take away valuable lessons for not only overcoming challenges but also directing a team towards sustainable success. We can treat each situation as an opportunity to learn, grow, and build meaningful connections while developing skills that will aid us when leading others anywhere be it at home or work.

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