The Art of Charm

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Leadership & Productivity in a Remote Workplace with Kevin Kruse Mar 30, 2020

Show notes

You don’t need to be in a leadership position in order to be a leader, but what does it mean to be a leader no matter where you are and how can you develop your leadership skills in today’s world?

What to Listen For

What can we do to become the leaders that are needed during this pandemic?
How should we approach the creation of rules and standards in a professional setting and why can it be detrimental if just one person is responsible for such things?
Why is it important to live a value-driven life both professionally and personally, and why are values more important than rules?
How can an open-door policy in companies be detrimental to productivity and what should you implement in place of it that still allows for open communication?
What are the 3 parts we should divide our days into and why can the structure have such a profound impact on our fulfillment and productivity?
How can living by a calendar make you more productive than making to-do lists to accomplish the same tasks?
What can you do to be more productive if you’re struggling to work from home during this pandemic?
What are the 3 agreements remote workers can discuss in order for remote workers to come up with a healthy, productive routine when everyone is used to being in the same office together?
What can you do to work on building a network while we are emphasizing social distancing?
Is it too late to start an online business as we enter this recession amidst a pandemic?
What can you do to be more social when everyone is trying to socially distance themselves?

Leadership is a set of skills anyone can develop no matter where you are because being a leader doesn’t mean you are in charge of employees or ordering people around. Leadership can be asking a coworker what they think about a relevant topic during a meeting, or organizing a group Skype call with family members around the country. Leadership can be as simple as taking the initiative to do something and inviting others to join you.

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Resources from this Episode

LEADx website

Great Leaders Have No Rules by Kevin Kruse

15 Secrets Successful People Know About Time Management by Kevin Kruse

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The Art of Overcoming Social Anxiety with Mark Metry Mar 23, 2020

Show notes

Social anxiety has an impact that goes far beyond a discomfort interacting with people and can lead to substance abuse, depression, and suicidal ideation, so what can you do to overcome your social anxiety, how do your diet and physical health impact it, and how is technology playing a significant role in all of this?

What to Listen For

What is social anxiety and how do we deal with it during COVID-19 when social distancing is important?
How do we deal with social anxiety now that social distancing is becoming a normal part of our daily lives?
How did Mark Metry overcome his social anxiety and what can you learn from his journey so you can overcome your social anxiety before it ruins your life?
How does your gut microbiome influence your social anxiety and mental wellbeing?
How can looking at yourself in terms of hardware and software with regards to your self-development journey blow open your perspective on your overall health?
Why is it important to tackle social anxiety after you’ve established a strong physical and mental foundation with a healthy diet and regular exercise?
What can you do to make sure you’re using technology and it’s not using you?
How is social anxiety tied to substance abuse, depression, and suicide and what can you do to overcome your social anxiety so you can live a more fulfilling life?

Many of us deal with social anxiety in varying degrees and in different situations. Someone might experience social anxiety talking to a group of people but be perfectly comfortable saying hi to a stranger. Someone else might experience social anxiety talking to their boss at work, but feel right at home at networking events. For some of us, it’s a mild obstacle we force ourselves through when we need to, but for others it can be a serious concern and have long lasting effects on your potential and happiness, not to mention your lifespan if it leads you down a path of self-isolation and depression.

Social anxiety can feel overwhelming, but you can overcome it. You can bounce back and become the best version of yourself that you want to be. But you have to be willing to take that first step and start living a healthy life - your mental and emotional well being are directly influenced by the food you put in your mouth and how often you exercise the only body you get.

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Resources from this Episode

Mark Metry’s Website

Humans 2.0 Podcast hosted by Mark Metry

Mark Metry on Twitter

Screw Being Shy by Mark Metry

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The Art of Charm Bootcamp

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Rituals and Meaning with Sasha Sagan Mar 16, 2020

Show notes

Rituals are powerful tools cultures have used for all of recorded history to strengthen group bonds, so how do rituals bring us closer, why are rituals so commonly associated with religion, and what can you do to develop your own rituals to bring you and your family and friends closer together?

What to Listen For

Why is it so important to encourage curiosity in children and what can you do to impart a sense of curiosity in your kids?
Why is a tolerance for ambiguity difficult but crucial in the scientific search for knowledge and understanding of the world around us?
What was it like growing up as the child of Carl Sagan and Ann Druyan?
How do we use rituals to deal with change and how can you use rituals to minimize the suffering you will experience throughout life?
What should you say to someone who hasjust lost a loved one and doesn’t necessarily hold religious beliefs about an afterlife?
What rituals can we use to help us cope with painful events in life and why can not having a ritual amplify the intensity and duration of the pain?
How can having a simple regular ritual strengthen your relationships and what fun easy ritual can you start using today?
What is the difference between a routine and a ritual?
How can you get children involved in building family rituals so everyone is involved and the family grows stronger?
What can you do to remix old traditions or even create new ones you can use to build meaning in the big and small moments of your life?
How do you tell the difference between cynicism and skepticism, and why can that understanding completely change your view of people?

The word ritual is on many occasions associated with religion. That’s a logical jump to make considering how ritualistic many religions are. But rituals can be any kind of practice or routine you use on a regular basis to be present and share a moment or event with yourself or other people. We can create and use rituals in our lives to help us celebrate certain moments. We don’t have to use religious holidays to celebrate certain times of the year, as cultures have been creating their own holidays and celebrations since the dawn of man. And no one’s stopping you from celebrating the rituals of your faith(s) and creating some rituals of your own to celebrate your family or friends or even just yourself.

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Resources from this Episode

Value Driven Success Video Training by The Art of Charm

For Small Creatures Such as We by Sasha Sagan

Sasha Sagan’s website

Sasha Sagan on Twitter

Sasha Sagan on Instagram

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Charisma: An Ill-Defined and Ill-Measured Gift

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The Art of Charisma Toolbox Mar 09, 2020

Show notes

Charisma is not something you are born with, so what can you do to develop your own charisma, what does it even mean to have charisma, and what does the science say about this seemingly abstract human quality?

What to Listen For

What is charisma and why is it important?
What are the three factors that go into being charismatic and what can you do to become more charismatic?
Are you born with charisma or is it something you can teach and learn?
Why are we drawn to charismatic individuals?
How can you stay true to yourself and be charismatic if you don’t feel you’re a charismatic person?
How do presence, enthusiasm, and confidence play a role in your natural charisma?
What questions can you ask yourself to know exactly what to work on to become more charismatic?
Why is active listening integral to being charismatic, and what can you do to improve your ability to listen?
Why are people drawn more toward optimists than pessimists, and how can you become more optimistic?
Why does it make you more charismatic if you don’t care what other people think about you?
What can you do to become more confident?
How does being assertive contribute to your confidence and charisma?

Charisma is one of those human qualities many people refer to as if it’s some mysterious genetic gift a few people are born with. But what if I told you that you can develop your own charisma in the same way you can develop a skill - like painting, running, or even chess. Once you understand the three components that factor into your own charisma, you’ll be able to see just how straightforward it can be to become the most charismatic version of who you want to be.

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Resources from this Episode

Episode 725 - Boost Your Emotional Intelligence w/ Michael Ventura

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How To Handle Awkward Social Interactions with Miki Agrawal Mar 02, 2020

Show notes

Authenticity is a powerful concept because many of us are scared of what other people might think of us if we were to be as weird as we know we are all the time, and consequently many of us hide the fun and interesting bits that make us who we are - so why do we care, why should we stop putting so much emphasis on what we think others want us to be, and what can you do when every social platform is signaling to you that the only parts worth living are the ones that get the most likes?

What to Listen For

What does it mean to be a disruptive innovator?
How do you educate people without being preachy?
What can you do to build up a tolerance for rejection so you don’t miss out on countless opportunities just because you walked away at “no”?
If you have perfectionist tendencies, what can you do to make sure it doesn’t stop you from completing something or just moving on without it?
What can you do if you feel like you are trying to fit yourself into a box that society wants for you rather than what YOU want for you?
What does it mean to be more authentic in today’s world where so many people are encouraged to instead put on a show to get other people’s attention?
How can you flip negative emotions on their heads with one simple trick?
What can you do to encourage others to tell their stories without resorting to 1-2 sentence responses?
How can you ask questions that evoke thoughtful responses instead of 1-2 words?
What mental exercise can you do before any important thing or event you have coming up in your life to make sure you’re genuinely present and relaxed?
What can you do to come across as open and friendly without making people think you’re inviting them to ask you out?
How do you politely reject someone who asks you out, especially in a work environment?
What’s the best way to make a career change when you realize you’re not happy with the job you thought would bring you happiness?
How do you handle the argumentative person who constantly questions others’ beliefs?

What are you supposed to do when people are telling you you should always strive to be genuine while society clearly shows us we’ll be rewarded if we present a curated image of ourselves to everyone on social media? We live in a tricky time with technology developing as quickly as it is. The tools we are inventing are beginning to control us and highlight our weaknesses as human beings, but will we overcome these weaknesses or implode because of them?

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Resources from this Episode

Miki Agrawal’s website

Disrupt-Her: A Manifesto for the Modern Woman by Miki Agrawal

Hello Tushy

Be Here Now by Ram Dass

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Overcoming the Five Dysfunctions of a Team

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The Art of Leadership in Business with Patrick Lencioni Feb 24, 2020

Show notes

Company culture might conjure silly images of bag chairs and free lunch to some, but company culture is much more than hip amenities and it can break an organization if it’s dysfunctional - so what is a dysfunctional company culture, how do you risk losing your best talent unless you improve it, and is any company too big or too old to change its ways?

What to Listen For

What two areas of business do you need in order to successfully run a business?
What are the 5 dysfunctions of management and what can you do to overcome them to build a world-class company culture people want to work with?
Why is a willingness to be vulnerable and admit when you don’t know something important to developing a healthy company culture?
Is conflict avoidance a good or bad thing in the workplace, and how should you approach disagreements and potential arguments?
What does it mean to be trustworthy in a business environment and how can you identify someone who isn’t trustworthy before their failure becomes your failure?
What should you do after realizing you are bringing dysfunctional behavior to an organization?
What exercises can you do to build trust within your organization, regardless of whether you’re in management or not?
What is the number one job killer for an individual within a business organization and what can you do to solve it without spending a dime?
What three things do people need at work to love going to work every day and how can you provide those three things without
Why is efficiency overrated and effectiveness underrated, and how can a drive for efficiency push out all the people who matter to your organization?
What 3 qualities do you need to be a great team player, and why can missing just one of them lead to a disaster?

Company culture is not about giving your employees more benefits, amenities, or unlimited vacation. Among other things, it is about trusting the people you work with, supporting open and honest communication, recognizing the contributions of others, and leadership/management that embodies healthy conflict resolution and leading by example. Without those things clearly communicated and reinforced from the top down, it’s only a matter of time before people get hired that do not believe in the same ideas, which leads to an organization where managers and leadership taking credit for their teams, people feeling isolated and unappreciated, and everyone looking out for themselves rather than the collective good.

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Resources from this Episode

The Five Dysfunctions of a Team: A Leadership Fable by Patrick Lencioni

The Motive: Why So Many Leaders Abdicate Their Most Important Responsibilities by Patrick Lencioni

Patrick Lencioni’s Company Website - TableGroup

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Justin Michael Williams website

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The Art of Meditation To Get Sh!t Done with Justin Michael Williams Feb 17, 2020

Show notes

Meditation and mindfulness have experienced a resurgence in modern western society as people continue struggling to find peace and fulfillment amidst the chaos and materialism of the modern world - so what can meditation teach us about our place in all of this, and how can we incorporate meditation into our daily lives to make us better friends, coworkers, lovers, and humans?

What to Listen For

How long should you meditate?
What does science say about meditation?
What’s the minimum effective dose of meditation?
What time of the day is best for meditating and when should you avoid meditating?
Why is it so important to be clear with yourself about your intentions?
What is the biggest misconception about meditation, especially when it comes to type A personalities?
What is the difference between practicing meditation and practicing mindfulness, and why does it matter?
What is meditation supposed to be about, and what do many people mistakenly think it’s about?
How did meditation first start and how has it evolved over countless human generations?
What does the word “mantra” mean with regards to meditation and why is there such an emphasis placed on having a mantra?
What can you do to develop your own mantra to make your meditation practice more personal, more purposeful, and longer-lasting?
How often should you revisit your mantra to decide whether or not it’s time for a new one?
What questions should you explore when meditating and how can the wrong questions lead you to a negative mental space?

Meditation is not about silencing your mind. Your mind’s sole purpose is to generate thoughts, so to think you can stop your mind from doing the one thing it’s supposed to do is like convincing yourself you can stop your heart from beating and keep living. Meditation is about accepting your thoughts and feelings and then learning to let go of them because they are not you. You experience thoughts and feelings - you are not your thoughts and feelings.

A Word From Our Sponsors

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Resources from this Episode

Stay Woke Give Back Tour

Stay Woke: A Meditation Guide for the Rest of Us by Justin Michael Williams

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The Art of Overcoming Fear and Rejection with John Livesay Feb 10, 2020

Show notes

Fear and rejection are natural parts of life, but if you want the most out of life, fear and rejection are two things you will face on a regular path to achieving your dreams - so what can you do to not only accept them but build a positive relationship with both, allowing you to channel their energy for your own forward momentum?

What to Listen For

How do you handle the fear of uncertainty in today’s job market when the economy is changing so rapidly?
What can you do to overcome the fear of rejection we all experience?
What exercise can you implement right now to start putting rejection into perspective and even look at rejection in a positive light?
How can you choose to look at failure so it helps you rather than stopping you from going after the life you want?
What is the difference between a perfectionist and a progressionist, and why can one hinder your success?
How can you break away from humility to tell a story worth sharing?
What are the 4 ways you can use to tell an engaging story people are going to want to give you their attention for?

An average life is average because doing great things is terrifying. That’s not to say an average life can’t be fulfilling, but many people dream of being able to live a life on their own terms. And to build a life where you have everything you want and can spend your time how you want to spend it requires that you put yourself outside of your comfort zone regularly. You must be willing to face your fears and walk through them. You must be willing to get knocked down by life only to get back up again and keep trying. If you want to find your soulmate, statistically you have to meet a lot of people, which means you’re going to be rejected a lot before you find the right one. If you want to find that dream job that allows you to spend your time doing something you love while being paid for it, you’re going to need to try a lot of different things and work for a lot of different people/companies before you find the right fit. You must be willing to try, fail, and try again.

A Word From Our Sponsors

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Resources from this Episode

Better Selling Through Storytelling by John Livesay

The Successful Pitch Podcast hosted by John Livesay

Be The Lifeguard of Your Own Life! | John Livesay | TEDxWilmingtonLive

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The Art of Value Driven Success Feb 03, 2020

Show notes

To many of us, the word values can sound like a buzzword thrown around in corporate-speak via emails and quarterly earnings calls - but individual values, once understood, can lead to a future of incredible potential, so what are the values we’re referring to, and what can you do to determine your values so you can live the life you’ve always wanted?

What to Listen For

Why is it important for each of us to determine our individual values, and how does living by those values help you to not make terrible decisions?
How do you choose your values?
What is the problem with goals, and why is the setting of goals not enough?
What questions can you ask yourself to determine some of your basic values?
How do you decide on company values, and why is it important for your company’s success to find employees who share those values?
What are the company values of the Art of Charm?
How did AJ Harbinger determine his values and how have they guided him to success?
Why does more discipline in your life lead to more freedom?
How did Johnny Dzubak determine his values and have they guided him to success?
What exercises can you implement today to track whether or not you are living by your values?

If you don’t choose the script for your life, others will do it for you, and there’s no guarantee the script will be conducive to your happiness and fulfillment in life. Your script is dictated by your values, and you can either decide what your values are and live an intentional life driven by them, or you can live a life that is subject to the values of others. If you choose not to choose and understand your values, it can result in a life of self-doubt, feelings of inadequacy, and being used by the people around you who are firm in their values or know how to take advantage of people who don’t stand for anything. So, what do you believe in?

A Word From Our Sponsors

Is there something interfering with your happiness, or preventing you from achieving your goals? BetterHelp will assess your needs and match you with your own licensed professional therapist AND you can start communicating in less than 24 hours! Visit betterhelp.com/CHARM to get 10% off your first month and join the over 700,000 people taking charge of their mental health with the help of an experienced professional.

Resources from this Episode

Great Leaders Have No Rules by Kevin Kruse

Art of Charm Bootcamp

Check in with AJ and Johnny!