The Art of Charm

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327: Dandapani | The Monk with a MacBook Oct 15, 2014

Show notes

No one has the right to hold you back. "There's nothing more important than knowing who you are, the path you are on and its final end." -Dandapani The Cheat Sheet: Why you should make your bed every day. (5:10) They watched 30 minutes of the news in his monastery: true or false? (14:20) The hierarchy of where to spend your energy as a parent and spouse. (27:50) What the law of thermodynamics has to do with relationships. (35:05) Affectionate detachment: what is it and do you need to implement it? (46:20) Why happiness should never be your goal in life. (54:05) And so much more... When you think of a monk do you think of coding, a Macbook Pro and lessons about life? Maybe the last of those three pops to mind but certainly the first two don't! And that is what makes our guest for episode 327 so interesting. Dandapani is a Hindu monk who lived in a Hawaiian monastery where they gave him a MacBook Pro and he spent some of his time coding websites! On today's show we talk about his origin story as a monk, how to keep children from sucking the energy out your relationship and what to do about energy vampires...all of that and so much more on this edition of The Art of Charm. More About This Show: Dandapani knew he wanted to be a monk since the age of 4. And he spent years looking for a teacher he connected with. He found many along the way, but none were the ideal match until he was a sophomore in college. He loved how practical and down to earth this particular teacher was and so when he told Dandapani to finish his engineering degree before joining his monastery, that's what he did. The moment he knew he had passed all of his exams and had completed his degree, Dandapani was on a flight to Hawaii. For the next 10 years he lived a life of celibacy and technology. He says his guru believed in bringing their teachings to the world, not through stone tablets, but through electronic tablets and web sites. So that's what the monks did: they built web sites, they learned a myriad of technology tools like Adobe products, Final Cut Pro, audio editing software, etc. And if that wasn't unconventional enough, they also watched 30 minutes of the news every day to keep them in touch with the world. Of course they also performed their daily chores and meditated, but only an hour of meditation per day and not the entire day like some orders. Dandapani learned a tremendous amount from his time with the order. When his 10 years were up, he left and returned to the mainland of the US (and not his home in Sri Lanka). He spent a year transitioning into "real life" and then moved to New York City with his wife where they now live. Although they don't have children yet, Dandapani has sage words for anyone who does on how to keep their marriage or relationship in tact while raising a family. He believes in what he calls "an energy hierarchy" and that if you follow his hierarchy, you will be able to stay connected to your significant other through the ups and downs of family life and you won't lose your relationship to your children's lives. In his hierarchy, you come first. That means you have to take care of yourself first, so you then have energy to give to your spouse who is next on the list. Children come in third. And why is this? Because typically if you take care of you and your spouse before your kids, you'll have the energy necessary to take care of them. On the subject of energy, Dandapani also had valuable advice on how to deal with energy vampires. He says 99% of the people he speaks with say they have energy vampires in their lives, but all too often we don't have the courage to address the issue. Once a year he sits down and assesses his relationships. He looks at who is an energy vampire in his life and then asks whether this is their natural way of being or are they simply going through a rough patch right now. If it's just a rough patch he never breaks ties with them. But if the person seems to just be depressed and negative on the whole, he finds a way to either minimize contact with them or to stop communicating with them entirely. He calls this affectionate detachment and in this episode he shares when and how to use it. One tip he gives us is to avoid communicating your stance with the energy vampire(s) in your life; you don't need to tell them you're cutting them out of your lives whenever possible because that simply instigates more negative conversation from them. Dandapani has quite a few additional suggestions and practical advice he generously shares with us in this episode, have a listen to hear it all! I want to thank him for joining us and to thank you for being here too. Enjoy the episode and we'll see you next time. THANKS DANDAPANI! If you enjoyed this session of the Art of Charm Podcast, let Dandapani know by clicking on the link below and sending him a quick shout out on Twitter: Click here to thank Dandapani on Twitter! Resources from this episode: Dandapani's web siteDandapani's YouTube channel Conversations on the Spiritual Path, Dandapani's podcast Dandapani on TwitterLondon Real podcast Try Squarespace (free) and support our supporters! You'll also like: -The Art of Charm Toolbox -Best of The Art of Charm Podcast Wanna leave a comment? Too bad! Email me instead (we read everything)! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dug this episode, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from all the fluff out there. FEEDBACK + PROMOTION Hit us up with your comments and guest suggestions. We read EVERYTHING. Download the FREE AoC app for iPhone Email jordanh@theartofcharm.com Give us a call at 888.413.7177 Stay Charming!

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326: Alex Kouts | The Art of Negotiating Oct 13, 2014

Show notes

Alex Kouts gives us the edge we need to overcome our fear of negotiating and make deals that benefit both sides of any arrangement. The Cheat Sheet: Why everybody's price is an f-you price, according to Alex. (11:15) How to emotionally prepare for awkwardness of negotiations. (23:20) BATNA: what is it and why is it so important? (31:10) Why women are better at negotiating than men. (32:30) When to apply the silent strategy. (35:05) What's the nuclear option in negotiation and how do you know when to push the red button? (48:30). And so much more... Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Show notes at http://theartofcharm.com/podcast-episodes/alex-kouts-art-negotiating-episode-326/ HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming!

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324: Judy Robinett | How to be a Power Connector Oct 08, 2014

Show notes

Choose who you connect with wisely. "Other people have all of the critical resources to get you to where you need to go." -Judy Robinett The Cheat Sheet: How to know if you're in the wrong room. (4:30) What are the three golden questions and when should you ask them? (13:20) Your network comes BEFORE your success: true or false? (13:35) How to test for duds in your network. (29:00) How to improve your ability to ask. (36:10) How she got Mark Burnett to endorse her show. (48:25) And so much more... If someone was from a small town in Idaho would you take their advice on networking? What if they had 10 billionaires in their Rolodex, would you listen then? That hypothetical person is our guest for today's show. On episode 324 we're talking with and taking notes from Judy Robinett, a power connector, a giver and the author of How To Be a Power Connector. We'll be discussing how to be a power connector, a life hack for connecting with people who have zero time, and what makes a quality relationship...and so much more on this edition of The Art of Charm. More About This Show: Judy Robinett knows what it's like to build a network. She wasn't born into powerful connections and in fact, she considers herself to be shy. To add to that, she lives in a small town in Idaho of less than 300 people so she's had to put in the time, effort and energy to build her Rolodex and be the power connector she is today. And she's done that by knowing the value of relationships and how to connect with people to build and solidify a relationship. She says it boils down to a few things, one of those being in the right room. What she means by that is putting yourself in the right place to connect with the right people. You have to connect and bond with people who are influential, wealthy and connected; and you have to know the right rooms to find them in. Regardless of where you are in your life, Judy says you do have something to give to these people: your ability to listen. Everyone has a problem they need solved, but all too often we're consumed with our own lives and our own issues to actually listen to someone else and hear their problems. And listening to someone allows them to know, like and trust you. And when someone knows you and likes you and trusts you, they are far more likely to help you with your problems and to connect you with their sphere of influence. If you need a way to find these people, Judy recommends joining the symphony or joining a powerful organization as a volunteer. You have something to give and you have something to offer, find a place where you can give it and connect with influencers in the process. Another life hack all of us can use to connect with anyone, even the uber-busy successful millionaires and thought leaders of the world is to attend an event they're at, meet them and establish a bit of a rapport before offering to drive them to the airport. They have to get to the airport somehow right?! If you can take them there, you'll have their undivided attention and be able to chat with them one on one. By doing so, you're adding value to their lives and making things easier for them which are two key components to building a solid, robust and successful relationship. So whether you're driving someone to the airport or volunteering within their organization or simply listening, you're adding value and contributing to that person's life. And Judy says that is one of the most important ways to start a connection that will strengthen and add value to both of your networks and both of your lives. Judy had so much value to contribute in this episode! I really appreciated how generously she shared her knowledge and insights, and the real-life examples of being a power connector are particularly valuable. I want to thank Judy for joining us and to thank you for being here too. Enjoy the episode and we'll see you next time. THANKS JUDY! If you enjoyed this session of the Art of Charm Podcast, let Judy know by clicking on the link below and sending her a quick shout out on Twitter: Click here to thank Judy on Twitter! Resources from this episode: Judy Robinett's web siteHow To Be a Power Connector, by Judy Robinett Judy on TwitterSchool of Greatness podcast Try Squarespace (free) and support our supporters! You'll also like: -The Art of Charm Toolbox -Best of The Art of Charm Podcast HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dug this episode, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from all the fluff out there. FEEDBACK + PROMOTION Hit us up with your comments and guest suggestions. We read EVERYTHING. Download the FREE AoC app for iPhone Email jordanh@theartofcharm.com Give us a call at 888.413.7177 Stay Charming!

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323: AoC Toolbox | Keeping Relationships Fresh Oct 06, 2014

Show notes

Don't ever stop pursuing her. "A lot of what you do to get the girl you need to do to keep the girl." - The Art of Charm Toolbox The Cheat Sheet: How not to be needy. (12:00) When and how to use sexual banter to add fun and intimacy (23:30) The three A's to build and maintain a healthy relationship. (30:55) Specific ways to break out of a rut, and why it's vital to do so. (36:45) The importance of touch in developing and keeping intimacy alive. (42:00) The 6 second hug: how and why to use it. (43:10) And so much more... When's the last time you took your girlfriend or wife out to do something new, or to go somewhere together you've never been before? If it's been awhile, or if you just want to add some flavor back into your relationship, this is the episode for you. On this Toolbox edition of the show we're talking about how to keep your relationship fresh, whether you're still in the honeymoon stage and want to continue it or you've been married for decades and want to bring back some of the playfulness from your early days. We'll discuss specific ways to deepen intimacy, freshen up your connection to each other and generally make your relationship even better. Join us for all of that and so much more on this edition of The Art of Charm. More About This Show: All too often we as men stop courting our girlfriends and wives once we feel we've "gotten" them. In fact, after we've landed the girl it's time to dig in and really do the work to keep her and keep the relationship flourishing. However long you've been together, keeping your relationship with her fresh is key to its long-lasting success. A great example of something you can do on an everyday basis is to offer suggestions for your nights out. When you ask her what she wants for dinner, offer her a choice between two options. If she wants something else she'll tell you, otherwise she'll choose between the two offers you've given her. By providing two different possibilities, you're showing her you care about the experience of dinner together and also giving her room to contribute by making the final choice. Another important aspect to keeping your relationship fresh is to be vulnerable. Some simple ways to do this are to be silly around her. Do you dance and sing when you're alone, but stop the minute she walks in the room? Allow yourself to be silly and express yourself, she and everyone else will respond to your authentic passion. That ties into the 3 A's of relationships: acknowledge, accept, and appreciate. Acknowledge your partner's passions. Did she just love the new yoga class she took? Then acknowledge it, don't just nod your head and say "that's cool" without enthusiasm. Be genuinely interested in what was so great about it for her and then acknowledge it. This shows empathy which is what ultimately truly connects us to others in a deep, meaningful way. Next accept her passions, accept who she is. Does she love her pottery class but you have no interest in it? That's fine, you don't have to love what she loves in order to be successful together. Doing so shows you care about her and what matters to her. Be supportive and accept what she is passionate about, even if you aren't because that will make her feel good. And feeling good around you is key to relationships. And finally there is appreciate. Appreciate when she shares valuable information with you and is vulnerable with you. Expressing herself, sharing her thoughts and feelings with you is an act of vulnerability so appreciating and thanking her for doing so will go a long way to keeping you together. In addition to the 3 A's we dive into a few more topics, but one last one area we'll touch on here is how to break out of a rut. Justin gives us some simple methods to doing so. He recommends finding new restaurants to go to if you've been going to the same ones, go on a different hike than you've been on before, try a new activity together preferably something neither of you have done before. What it boils down to is doing something new together, it'll help reignite that spark you felt in your early days of dating or it'll help keep that spark alive if you're still honeymooning. There's so much more we cover on this episode! It was a blast to chat about keeping relationships fresh and vulnerably sharing mistakes we've made in the past and things we're doing now in this area of our lives. It was great to create this show for you and I hope you enjoy the episode! THANKS AoC! If you enjoyed this session of the Art of Charm Podcast, let us know by clicking on the link below and sending us a quick shout out on Twitter: Click here to thank The AOC on Twitter! Resources from this episode: Previous Toolbox episodes The Art of Charm on Twitter My Secret Garden, by Nancy Friday Thrillist Unencyclopedia Try Squarespace (free) and support our supporters! You'll also like: -The Art of Charm Toolbox -Best of The Art of Charm Podcast HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dug this episode, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from all the fluff out there. FEEDBACK + PROMOTION Hit us up with your comments and guest suggestions. We read EVERYTHING. Download the FREE AoC app for iPhone Email jordanh@theartofcharm.com Give us a call at 888.413.7177 Stay Charming!

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322: Srinivas Rao | The Unmistakable Creative Oct 03, 2014

Show notes

You really did learn everything in kindergarten. "Your ability to take action in the face of unanswered questions is essential to accomplishing anything of significance." - Srinivas Rao The Cheat Sheet: What are gaba levels? (4:50) What have been the two themes throughout his career? (9:30) The unhealthy myths of a "self-running business" and of being a nomad. (13:30) Why you need patience when starting any new venture. (18:00) How to get back into the creative space of kindergarten. (31:50) Google's 20% time policy and how to apply it for success. (41:50) And so much more... A bank robber. A happiness expert. A hip hop artist. A CEO of a multi-million dollar company. Can you find the common thread? Maybe, maybe not. Our guest for episode 322 can; these are all types of people he has interviewed on his podcast, The Unmistakable Creative. On today's show Srinivas and I talk about the current state and future of podcasting, why comparing yourself to others is a losing battle, as well as the roles curiosity and creativity play in succeeding at business. Join us for all of that and so much more on this edition of The Art of Charm. More About This Show: Just a few short years ago, Srinivas was faced with the daunting task of finding work in a declining economy. He had just graduated business school and wanted to find work that would give him a creative outlet. He had had a social media internship but felt wholly unequipped to work in that field. So he began experimenting. He started a web site, but quickly stopped when he couldn't deliver on the topic of the site. Then he started a blog and started interviewing people. That experimentation eventually led to what is his podcast today, Unmistakable Creative. The show gets over 10,000 downloads an episode and allows Srinivas to connect with some of the most innovative and interesting people in the world. As we mentioned earlier, he's interviewed a bank robber, happiness experts, behaviorists and super successful CEOs. The show has been so successful and has such a wide appeal is the varied guests but also Srinivas' approach to podcasting. He views it as a craft, an art form that must be invested in, worked on and molded into its finest form. To do this, he naturally analyzes his previous shows and looks at what to do better in the future, but he also turns off distractions and unplugs. Some of his greatest inspirations and breakthroughs have come through unrelated activities, like surfing. He also did an experiment where he spent 20 hours learning to do something he was terrible at: drawing. As a result of studying the art of drawing, he also saw the impact in his business. It's a practice he recommends to everyone: experiment with art and see where it takes you. Go out and sing, take an improv class and explore the new insights it gives you. Not only will art give you insights, it also provides a much-needed reprieve from our information-overload society. Srinivas has discovered the value in unplugging and being conscious of what information he's taking in, and he suggests everyone do the same. There is scientific evidence to support him; science has shown that our environment can and does have a significant impact on our overall well-being. One final topic we discuss is the state of podcasting. We dive into the reasons why anyone doing an interview show needs to take the craft seriously and why it's important to cultivate relevant, interesting content (and why that is no small feat). Even if you aren't a podcaster or an entrepreneur, we cultivate relevant information for you in this show. Srinivas was an interesting and insightful guest, please join me in thanking him for being on the show today. It was great to talk with him and I hope you enjoy the episode! Thanks for being here and we'll see you next time. THANKS SRINIVAS! If you enjoyed this session of the Art of Charm Podcast, let Srinivas know by clicking on the link below and sending him a quick shout out on Twitter: Click here to thank Srinivas on Twitter! Resources from this episode: The Unmistakable Creative web siteThe Art of Being Unmistakable, Srinivas' latest book Srinivas on Twitter Episode 250 of The AOC with Robert Green Knot Standard Try Squarespace (free) and support our supporters! You'll also like: -The Art of Charm Toolbox -Best of The Art of Charm Podcast HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dug this episode, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from all the fluff out there. Ways to subscribe to The Art of Charm FEEDBACK + PROMOTION Hit us up with your comments and guest suggestions. We read EVERYTHING. Download the FREE AoC app for iPhone Email jordanh@theartofcharm.com Give us a call at 888.413.7177 Stay Charming!

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321: John Jantsch | Duct Tape Marketing: Why Everyone Needs a Personal Brand Oct 01, 2014

Show notes

Choose a word you can say you stand for. "You need to grab on to something that you say 'this is what I stand for'." -John Jantsch The Cheat Sheet: How long did it take him to write his first book? (10:50) You have to have a narrow niche: true or false? (13:00) What's the 6-week expert phenomenon? (15:00) The power of content creation whether you're an employee or a business owner (19:30) What causes the death of a great conversation? (26:50) How to avoid information pollution (35:00) And so much more... Many marketers and promoters in the Internet world today call themselves experts on a given topic. But check back in a few weeks and a lot of them have changed their field of expertise. And that is not how to become a recognized leader according to our guest for episode 321. John Jantsch is the author of his latest book: Duct Tape Selling. He's also the head honcho of Duct Tape Marketing, a brand and business devoted to practical, systemized marketing for everyone from employee to business owner. And in today's episode we discuss why everyone needs a personal brand, a content creation platform and specialized skills in speaking. And why these three things are so important even if you don't have a business or want to have a business of your own. Join us for all of that and so much more on this edition of The Art of Charm. More About This Show: John Jantsch has been called the world's most practical small business expert; he jokingly says all the other titles were taken and that's why he was given his moniker! But the truth is he is a practical expert and teacher for small businesses and employees alike. His practical teaching extends beyond small business to everyone when we discuss the necessity of a personal brand. John says branding isn't just for big companies or just for companies in general, it is for all of us. We must find something we stand for and take on a point of view, then share that viewpoint with the world. John's stance is practicality and his viewpoint has always been that marketing is a system. Others may teach and preach about the latest marketing technique, but John has always relied on his marketing system philosophy. Doing so has served him well. He's a widely-known speaker and author, the latest being the book Duct Tape Selling, but he also has penned three others. And he's been a podcaster since 2005 and a speaker even before then. When you're establishing your brand and what you stand for, it's important to tap into something you truly believe in and to stick with it. Far too many people today are what he calls the "six week expert", meaning they find a new topic and for about 6 weeks (or even less in some cases), taught themselves as the latest and greatest source for anything and everything related to that topic. Once you've found your thing, John recommends finding a platform to express yourself from. A blog is always an obvious choice since it's simple to get started and nearly anyone can do it. He also talks about the benefits of running a podcast and the access you can have to incredible thought leaders and experts, people you may not have been able to connect with otherwise. There are other platforms too, the important point here is to choose one and again, stick with it. Another great topic John and I chat about is how valuable speaking is for anyone and everyone. Speaking is like social interaction on steroids, everything you do and every way you are being is magnified on stage. Plus it's incredibly beneficial to face a fear like public speaking and act, despite that fear. To help overcome that fear, John gives us a terrific suggestion:take an improv class. He says it's absolutely humbling but it's also one of the most useful activities he's ever done for himself and for his speaking abilities. It's something he encourages everyone to do, even if they aren't interested in becoming a public speaker. One final suggestion he makes, another practical tip, is to turn our phones off for extended periods of time. He says it makes him exponentially more productive and reduces his distractions and recovery time from those distractions. Join me in thanking John for those useful tips as well as his practical insights on choosing a personal brand, sticking with your unique viewpoint and the importance of public speaking for everyone, whether an employee or a business owner. It was great to have him on the show and I hope you enjoy the episode! Thanks for being here and we'll see you next time. THANKS JOHN! If you enjoyed this session of the Art of Charm Podcast, let John know by clicking on the link below and sending him a quick shout out on Twitter: Click here to thank John on Twitter! Resources from this episode: John's web siteDuct Tape Selling, John's latest book John on TwitterFeedly Try Squarespace (free) and support our supporters! You'll also like: -The Art of Charm Toolbox -Best of The Art of Charm Podcast HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dug this episode, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review!This is what helps us stand out from all the fluff out there. FEEDBACK + PROMOTION Hit us up with your comments and guest suggestions. We read EVERYTHING. Download the FREE AoC app for iPhone Email jordanh@theartofcharm.com Give us a call at 888.413.7177 Stay Charming!

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320: Julian Treasure | Conscious Listening, How & Why Sep 29, 2014

Show notes

How to listen the way women want you to. "If you are somebody who listens it gives you advantages in all walks of life. Persuaders, influencers and leaders are people who really listen." - Julian Treasure The Cheat Sheet: You hear with your whole body: true or false? (6:35) Why listening is a skill and not something that comes naturally. (15:25) Julian explains why listening is NOT the same for everyone. (21:25) What is empathetic listening? (25:05) RASA: what is it and how can you use it to consciously listen? (31:15) Why we equate deeper voices with more powerful people. (49:30) And so much more... Have you ever been working and you simply couldn't concentrate because that annoying guy in sales was so loud you could hear him clear across the room? There's actually a scientific reason it bothers you and lowers your productivity. Joining us to give us insights on to why that is and how powerfully sound impacts every other aspect of our lives is Julian Treasure. Julian is a sound expert and Ted Talks speaker who helps people understand the importance of conscious listening. On episode 320, a few of the topics we touch on are the four ways hearing touches you and impacts you, why the listening stereotype about men has some truth to it (and what we can do about it) and how we can fix some poor listening and speaking habits. Join us for an interesting and informative show! More About This Show: All of us are greatly impacted by sound in our lives, but few of us are fully conscious of it and even fewer of us are conscious listeners. When you walk into a store that's playing loud pop music notice how your body speeds up and actually wants you to get out of the store faster! Our guest for this episode says the retailer didn't take sound into consideration when they designed their store. This behavioral response is rooted in our body's awareness of sound: if it's loud, we move away from it and if it's quiet or soft and soothing, we slow down. There are three other ways our bodies respond to sound: physiological, psychological, and cognitive. When it comes to the physiological, our bodies will speed up or slow down according to the sounds we hear. If there's loud music like in a dance club, our heart rate quickens, and our blood pressure goes up. If we are listening to the sounds of the ocean, our heart rate slows down as does our blood pressure. Sounds can even change our hormone secretions, the sense of sound is incredibly connected to our physiology and has been since we were in the womb. The psychological response to sound is similar. If we're listening to birds sing, we become calmer and more at peace. Over the centuries our bodies have understood that if the birds are singing than everything is ok in the outside world and we don't have to be on the alert. If we're walking in the forest by ourselves and we hear a branch snap behind us, sound immediately tells our brains to look around and make sure we are not in danger. And cognitively, we are bothered by loud conversations while working because our brains can only take in about 1.6 conversations at any given time. That means someone's conversation can be so loud you cannot think or concentrate, and thereby lowers your productivity in a loud office or working space. So how does this tie into conscious listening? Simply by being aware of our bodies' responses to sound we can see the immense value in what we're saying and how it's being received. If we understand that every sound, every word has an impact and a response in those around us we start to become aware of the necessity of conscious listening. And we can take this awareness into every aspect of our lives, including relationships. On the topic of relationships, Julian goes on to explain the nuggets of truth in the gender stereotype of men as poor listeners, but he says men can overcome this. Men tend to listen to hear a point and then offer a solution, most of us already know this. But that's nearly the opposite of how women speak and how they listen: they do so to share and relive an experience with their listener as a way to connect, they don't talk about problems because they want them fixed. A way for men to be better listeners in that situation is to ask the question: where am I listening from right now? If you catch yourself listening from a place of wanting to fix, be conscious of it and practice moving into what Julian calls "empathetic listening", which is the type of listening and communicating women naturally use. Empathetic listening can mean offering her a glass of wine and your undivided attention while she shares. That tip ties into Julian's recommendations to become a conscious listener and to change your bad speaking and listening habits. Simply by being aware of where you're listening from, the pace you're using with your voice, the register of your voice and your intonation you can begin to become a more active listener and a more conscious speaker. And there's lots more where that came from. Julian was a "treasure trove" of knowledge (see what we did there?) on this episode, he gave us a lot of excellent material to start shifting our listening to a more conscious place. It was great to have him on the show and I hope you enjoy the episode! Thanks for being here and we'll see you next time. THANKS JULIAN! If you enjoyed this session of the Art of Charm Podcast, let Julian know by clicking on the link below and sending him a quick shout out on Twitter: Click here to thank Julian on Twitter! Resources from this episode: Julian's web siteJulian's latest Ted Talk Julian on TwitterMorgan Freeman chats with Jimmy Kimmel while sucking helium Try Squarespace (free) and support our supporters! You'll also like: -The Art of Charm Toolbox -Best of The Art of Charm Podcast HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dug this episode, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review!This is what helps us stand out from all the fluff out there. FEEDBACK + PROMOTION Hit us up with your comments and guest suggestions. We read EVERYTHING. Download the FREE AoC app for iPhone Email jordanh@theartofcharm.com Give us a call at 888.413.7177 Stay Charming!

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319: Andrew Ferebee | Knowledge for Men Sep 26, 2014

Show notes

From wantrepreneur to real-life success story. "Instead of wondering when your next vacation is, maybe you should set up a life you don't need to escape from." - Seth Godin The Cheat Sheet: The good and the bad types of wantrepreneurs. How many views did his first article receive in its first 24 hours online? He was a bad writer in school: true or false? Why did he start his podcast? Who are some of his most notable interviewees on his show? Why you need to be the author of your own life. And so much more... If you've ever found yourself feeling stifled, uninspired or even depressed it might be because you're in the wrong career. You might be an entrepreneur trapped in an employee's life. Such was the case for our guest for episode 319. Andrew Ferebee was a manager at a big chain retailer when he realized he was actually an entrepreneur. But it wasn't one of those epiphanies he had in a nanosecond, instead it was a battle with clinical depression combined with a quest for personal growth that led him to this discovery. In this episode we cover what the experience of depression was like for him, how he moved forward with his life and took an incredible leap of faith that has paid off handsomely with his brand Knowledge For Men. More About This Show: Today Andrew is the headmaster at Knowledge For Men, a web site and podcast about helping guys create their best, most fulfilling lives. But this was a business idea born from his disenchantment, loss and depression. It all began with his first job out of college. He became a manager for a well-known retailer who gave him one of their most high-risk stores in Southern California. By high-risk they meant high problems, like sketchy neighborhood, less than stellar employees, high turnover and just a lot of headaches in general. At the same time, his social network was completely changing post-college and he lost a romantic relationship with a woman he wanted to marry. He soon found himself dreading the work day and the monotony of it. That monotony led to an episode of clinical depression that was so severe one day while driving over a bridge, he wondered to himself what it would be like if he simply drove off the edge. He wondered if it would take away all the gut-wrenching pain he was struggling with. Having a level of self-awareness, Andrew understood he needed help and reached out for counseling. He was diagnosed with clinical depression and combined his treatment with massive action and personal growth to pull himself out of his depressive state. He read tons and tons of books on the subject, in fact he still does. And he listened to hours of podcasts like this one and many others while on his way to and from work. He also made it a goal to attend meet ups and become friends with other "wantrepreneurs" and real-life entrepreneurs. Finally one day he decided he had had enough and it was time to leave his soul-sucking job. Without a real game plan, he did. He spent the first week celebrating, the second week freaking out and then published an article on a blog called Knowledge For Men. That article, without any push or marketing from him, went viral. In its first 24 hours it was read by 50,000 people. He had so many visitors to his site that it crashed and he had to upgrade! That trend continued with the next batch of content he released and he knew he was on to something. That was in the spring of 2013 and since then, he has grown his blog to become a web site and a podcast. He leveraged his blog audience to gain an even larger podcast listenership and to land such well-known guests as Jordan Belfort, the Wolf of Wall Street and Kevin Harrington of TV's Shark Tank. Andrew attributes his success to his openness to personal growth and his willingness to take massive action on goals he sets for himself. He was an attendee at our bootcamp and says it not only taught him new tactics but also helped him take action to implement them. He learned how to improve his social life of course, but it all parlayed into him becoming a more solid person and a force to be reckoned with in the business world. Please join me in thanking Andrew for sharing his stories with us. He's a shining example of how to overcome any challenge or obstacle put in your path by seeking support, setting goals and applying yourself to the achievement of them. He was a terrific guest and we appreciate him for stopping by. Thanks for being here and we'll see you next time. THANKS ANDREW! If you enjoyed this session of the Art of Charm Podcast, let Andrew know by clicking on the link below and sending him a quick shout out on Twitter: Click here to thank Andrew on Twitter! Resources from this episode: Andrew's web site Andrew on Twitter You'll also like: -The Art of Charm Toolbox -Best of The Art of Charm Podcast HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dug this episode, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from all the fluff out there. FEEDBACK + PROMOTION Hit us up with your comments and guest suggestions. We read EVERYTHING. Download the FREE AoC app for iPhone Email jordanh@theartofcharm.com Give us a call at 888.413.7177 Stay Charming!

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318: Grant Baldwin | Follow Your Passion: When and How Sep 24, 2014

Show notes

There is no straight line from your current job to your ideal career. "No matter how much you enjoy what you do, there will always come a time when it is work." - Grant Baldwin The Cheat Sheet: The myth of the perfect job and/or career. (7:00) The best time to start something is when? And the second best time? (14:45) Why you're NEVER in too deep. (19:00) Follow your passion: does Grant say yay or nay to this advice? (27:10) Why the path of least resistance doesn't work. (33:45) How many different careers do most people have on average? (44:00) And so much more... Follow your passion is almost a cliche it's been used so often. But what does that phrase even mean and is it really a good idea? Yes and no says our guest for episode 318, Grant Baldwin. Grant is a speaker and podcaster who produces the show "How Did You Get Into That?". On his show, he interviews men and women who encountered a "mid-life crisis" and got into an unusual profession or started a unique business as a result. On today's episode he and I discuss why there's no such thing as "the perfect job or career", why not to take a job solely for money, when following your passion is terrible advice and how to discover what your passions actually are and then create a job or business you love based on them. Join us as we talk about all that and so much more on this edition of The Art of Charm. More About This Show: One of the most challenging questions any of us will face is what to do with our professional lives. The advice we usually hear: follow your passion! But if you're like most people, following your passion means something vastly different at 18 than it does at 28, 38 or 58. Grant Baldwin knows this, he's been there. He has always known he loves speaking and loves working with people to help them find out what they want to do in the world. Today he is a sought-after speaker and also runs a podcast aimed at helping people find their path in life by hearing other people's cool jobs and unique businesses. He helps people see they aren't stuck where they are, no matter how deeply entrenched in their career choice they feel they are. One thing Grant has discovered in his journey and his discussions with people is that there is no such thing as the "perfect career or job"; everything you do, no matter how much you love it, will eventually take some work and some hustle. And I concur. But as long as you have more days that you love than hate, you're on the right path. We also agree that taking a job solely for the money it will pay is the wrong choice, but money should be a factor. So if you're looking at how to make your passions a real paying gig, money is naturally a consideration but it shouldn't be the only one. If you're thinking of going to law school because lawyers make bank, not because you love what it takes to have a career in law, you'd be wise to rethink that course. Both Grant and I agree we'd rather do something that makes us less money but makes us happy, rather than make more money and be miserable in that job or business. A common complaint both Grant and I hear is that it's too late for someone to make a change, they're in too deep with mountains of debt from school, a family to take care of, etc. And while those are always factors and considerations, Grant and I know people who have overcome all those obstacles to switch career paths, create new opportunities and new businesses that now make those same people happy and plenty of money. Grant's recommendation in a situation like that is incremental bravery. One of his guests coined the phrase and he liked it so much he uses it. Incremental bravery is taking small, calculated risks towards the goal or vision you are pursuing. In other words, don't chuck your job on Friday and think you'll find your dream career the next Monday. It doesn't work like that. But if you take steps towards figuring out what you love, what you're good at and how you can make money by combining those two, you'll be on your way. On this show, Grant gives us some actionable tips and suggestions on how to follow our passion, find our talents and then see potential career possibilities based on the combination of those two. It's real world advice to get you started on a new path towards happiness and professional satisfaction. Thanks for being here and we'll see you next time. THANKS GRANT! If you enjoyed this session of the Art of Charm Podcast, let Grant know by clicking on the link below and sending him a quick shout out on Twitter: Click here to thank Grant on Twitter! Resources from this episode: Grant's web site Grant on Twitter5 Questions To Find Your Passion You'll also like: -The Art of Charm Toolbox -Best of The Art of Charm Podcast If you dug this episode, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from all the fluff out there. FEEDBACK + PROMOTION Hit us up with your comments and guest suggestions. We read EVERYTHING. Download the FREE AoC app for iPhone Email jordanh@theartofcharm.com Give us a call at 888.413.7177 Stay Charming!

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317: Jayson Gaignard | Next-Level Networking Sep 22, 2014

Show notes

Proof that your network is your net-worth. "When you hit rock bottom you will be left with two things: your network and your word. Never tarnish your word and always invest in your network." - Jayson Gaignard The Cheat Sheet: Why making 22x the national average made him unhappy. (9:40) The two things that landed him in $250,000 in cash debt. (12:00) What is his perfect day exercise? (20:25) The two types of freedom. (21:40) Eustress: what is it and do you want to have it? (32:20) Event ROI: why it's been so important. (42:05) And so much more... When choosing a career path or a business endeavor, we often hear advice to choose a profitable industry or niche. But what if we we choose it, make a ton of money doing it but are utterly miserable? What happens then? Here to share his experience of that scenario is Jayson Gaignard. Jayson is the CEO and driving force behind Mastermind Talks, an event-based organization devoted to bringing the greatest entrepreneurs together through events and networking. Have a listen to episode 317 in which Jayson and I talk about how he sabotaged his first multi-million dollar company and how he then relied on his network and his word to build a new business and rebuild his life. More About This Show: There are generally two pieces of advice given to most people starting out in business or on their career paths: network and pick a profitable market to get in to. Jayson Gaignard did both with his first business. He was in the ticket-selling industry and he built a ton of high-level contacts while in the game. But it was a niche he hated. Jayson had no interest in ticket sales or the events attached to those tickets. And one day, after he had amassed a highly lucrative business, he looked around and realized he was miserable. He had destroyed many relationships while building his company, his health was plummeting and he didn't care one iota about selling tickets or taking care of their customers. Being the savvy businessman he is, he knew he should sell it and this was his plan. But subconsciously he says he was disenchanted with everything about his business that he sabotaged it, so he would have nothing to sell. When he looks back now, he understands he did so because he didn't want the burden of selling such a life-draining business to one of his friends. He had plenty of offers, but he just couldn't sell it to someone else and risk tarnishing his friendship with them if they ended up hating it as much as he did by the end! So instead, life intervened as it often does, and he found himself with a defunct business and $250,000 in cash debt. Not sure where revenue was going to come from next coupled with the stress of a newborn baby, Jayson hustled his way out the only way he knew how: his network. He began throwing dinner parties and bringing together 6-8 entrepreneurs for conversation and connection. And they were an incredible success, he knew the first night it was something he would do for the rest of his life. His next break was an opportunity to bring Tim Ferriss to Canada for the first time. Tim was in the midst of a book blitz for The Four-Hour Chef. One of Tim's package deals was to buy $84,000 of books in exchange for two speaking engagements. Not having any idea how he'd pay for it, Jayson went for it. He knew he'd figure it out. And so he did. Jayson's network came through for him and one of his friends invested the $84k to get him off the ground. Leveraging Tim's name and their mutual friends, Jayson brought together a world-class group of speakers for a mastermind weekend. From over 3,000 applicants, he hand-selected attendees and the weekend was unforgettable. The first one was so successful he has since held another weekend with the same caliber of speakers and attendees! That was how Jayson not only brought himself out of a quarter of a million dollars worth of debt, but also how he fully realized the power of a network. Today Jayson continues to host events through his company, Mastermind Talks. And he has rebuilt his work and his life around new values of integrity and connection. Jayson was a terrific guest, it was great to have him on the show and hear his story, his insights and his wisdom. Have a listen and then take action to create a powerful network of your own. We'll see you next time. THANKS JAYSON! If you enjoyed this session of the Art of Charm Podcast, let Jayson know by clicking on the link below and sending him a quick shout out on Twitter: Click here to thank Jayson on Twitter! Resources from this episode: Jayson's web site Jayson on TwitterThe 4-Hour ChefLondon Reel You'll also like: -The Art of Charm Toolbox -Best of The Art of Charm Podcast HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dug this episode, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from all the fluff out there. FEEDBACK + PROMOTION Hit us up with your comments and guest suggestions. We read EVERYTHING. Download the FREE AoC app for iPhone Email jordanh@theartofcharm.com Give us a call at 888.413.7177 Stay Charming!

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