The Anxious Achiever

Latest Episodes:

You Can Unshame Yourself with David Bedrick Dec 04, 2025

Show notes

The shame you feel at work isn’t a personal flaw, but a kind of violence acting on your story, your body, and your worth. In this episode, I sit down with psychologist David Bedrick, whose pioneering work on unshaming helps us understand how shame interprets the world for us and how you can reclaim your own internal witness. We talk about why shame is not just a feeling but a lens, how childhood interpretations stick with us for decades, and why so many of us carry invisible pain through our careers, relationships, and leadership roles. David shares how the body speaks when our lives become too heavy to carry, and how that “symptom” is often a messenger of our deeper story, not a problem to be erased. Tune in to start unshaming yourself from the inside out.

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In this Episode, You Will Learn

00:00 What is shame and why is it not a feeling?

04:15 How childhood witnessing becomes your lifelong lens.

08:00 The link between chronic illness, over-responsibility, and hidden shame.

14:00 How a simple temper tantrum can reveal a protest your body is begging you to hear.

19:30 Why pain and exhaustion are often your body’s way of saying “this is too much.”

21:30 How layoffs, business failure, and money anxiety get wrapped in shame at work.

26:00 The one question that begins unshaming others and yourself.

29:00 How to ask about someone’s experience without piling on more shame.

37:00 Why we never tell anyone about our chronic pain.

41:30 How to start walking the “unshaming way” in your own life, relationships, and work.

Resources + Links

Learn more about David Bedrick HERE

Get a copy of my book - The Anxious Achiever

Watch the podcast on YouTube

Find more resources on our website morraam.com

Follow

Follow me: on LinkedIn @morraaronsmele + Instagram @morraam

Follow David: @david.bedrick

Exploring AI Anxiety With A Leader In Charge Of AI Transformation with Lee Gonzales Dec 02, 2025

Show notes

What if your AI anxiety isn’t a flaw, but a signal to evolve how you work? In this episode, I sit down with Lee Gonzales, engineering leader and creator of BetterUp’s AI Flight School, to talk about why AI feels existential, why it threatens your craft and identity, and how you can move from fear to agency. We dive into how psychological safety, values, and collective sensemaking help people shift from “AI will replace me” to “AI can expand me.” Tune in if you’re ready to move from avoidance to informed action and become the pilot of your AI future, not the passenger.

Check out our sponsors:

Northwest Registered Agent - Protect your privacy, build your brand and get your complete business identity in just 10 clicks and 10 minutes! Visit https://www.northwestregisteredagent.com/achieverfree

In this Episode, You Will Learn

00:00 Why AI anxiety pushed Lee to reinvent his entire career.

04:45 How AI differs from every prior technological leap.

08:00 What distinguishes an “AI passenger” from an “AI pilot”?

10:00 Is the agency real or a helpful illusion?

14:45 Why psychological safety is the first requirement for AI learning.

18:03 How to reframe anxiety into possibility using values and task design.

22:15 Why AI can weaken your cognitive muscles if you’re not careful.

25:15 The values-based exercise that helps you understand your resistance.

28:45 Why engineers struggle with AI’s impact on the craft they love.30:30 What AlphaGo teaches us about self-learning systems and exponential change.

32:00 How prompting helps people reflect on values and reclaim agency.

34:15 Lee’s “aha” moment from Flight School participants.

36:00 Why AI can feel like an “infinite agency machine” when used well.

Resources + Links

Get a copy of my book - The Anxious Achiever

Watch the podcast on YouTube

Find more resources on our website morraam.com

Follow

Follow me: on LinkedIn @morraaronsmele + Instagram @morraam

Follow Lee on LinkedIn: @leegonzales

America’s Nervous System Is Dysregulated with Kate Woodsome Nov 25, 2025

Show notes

What if the problem in America isn’t just political? What if our collective nervous system is overloaded? In this episode, I sit down with Kate Woodsome, journalist turned civic resilience researcher and trainer, to talk about how personal trauma, chronic stress, and media-driven threat responses scale up into polarization, civic dysfunction, and even openings for authoritarianism. Tune in for tools leaders and citizens can use to get grounded before you engage.

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In this Episode, You Will Learn

00:00 What is civic resilience?

07:15 What nervous system literacy actually trains you to notice.

12:00 Why body scans and relaxed muscles matter for sustained leadership.

16:15 Systemic drivers of chronic stress.

19:30 Why tech + speed amplify perceived danger and make regulation insufficient alone.

25:45 How trauma, polarization, and authoritarianism play out at work and in nations.

33:15 Nonverbal signals that communicate compassion.

38:45 Why Kate believes nervous system literacy can strengthen democracy.

Resources + Links

Subscribe to Kate Woodsome’s Substack and Newsletter for updates on her civic-resilience work

Get a copy of my book - The Anxious Achiever

Watch the podcast on YouTube

Find more resources on our website morraam.com

Follow

Follow me: on LinkedIn @morraaronsmele + Instagram @morraam

Follow Kate: on LinkedIn @katewoodsome + Instagram @kwoodsome

How To Heal After A Layoff with Yowei Shaw Nov 20, 2025

Show notes

Layoffs do more than drain your bank account, they shake your sense of worth, belonging, and identity. In this episode, Yowei Shaw, an emotional investigative journalist shares what it felt like to get laid off from NPR, why the experience upends identity and dignity, and how the social systems around unemployment actually make healing harder. We talk about the strange behaviors that show up before and after a layoff, how companies actually decide who goes (spoiler: it’s often opaque), and ways to recover. Get ready to rethink what safety, identity, and recovery look like after a layoff.

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In this Episode, You Will Learn

00:00 Meet Yowei Shaw, an emotional investigative journalist.

05:15 What it felt like inside NPR during the layoff month.

11:00 What changed at work during the layoffs?

19:45 Is HR your enemy?

22:30 Why intense shame is a common experience after being laid off.

25:00 Stigma and hiring discrimination against laid-off workers.

30:00 How losing the illusion can be liberating.

32:45 How identity changes after leaving a big brand and why that can be a creative opportunity.

Resources + Links

Get a copy of my book - The Anxious Achiever

Watch the podcast on YouTube

Find more resources on our website morraam.com

Follow

Follow me: on LinkedIn @morraaronsmele + Instagram @morraam

Follow Yowei: @yoweishaw

AI, ADHD, And Humanness with Dr. Tracy Dennis Tiwary Nov 18, 2025

Show notes

Is your anxiety about AI actually trying to help you? In this episode, I sit down with Dr. Tracy Dennis Tiwary to talk about AI anxiety, overdiagnosis, ADHD, and why we’ve medicalized so much of our emotional life that we’ve lost sight of what it means to be human. Tracy shares why we were unprepared for the mental health fallout of social media, why we’re just as unprepared for AI, and how leaders can support teams through technological uncertainty without collapsing into fear or false certainty. Tune in to learn how to engage with AI without losing your humanity and how to work with your anxiety instead of treating it like an enemy.

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In this Episode, You Will Learn

00:00 Why AI anxiety is showing up differently for each of us.

06:45 Is AI an intelligence or just a (very powerful) tool?

10:45 How calling AI “smart” and human-like hides what it actually does.

14:00 Why we weren’t prepared for social media’s mental health impact.

15:15 Ways to use chatbots and therapeutic AI without getting lost in them.

21:00 ADHD, dichotomies, and how medicalizing mental health distorts what diagnoses can do.

26:00 Why treating symptoms isn’t the same as healing.

29:00 If mental illness isn’t just a broken brain, what is it?

30:30 Why there is no single biomarker for conditions like bipolar disorder or ADHD.

38:45 Why anxiety is tied to uncertainty, hope, and creativity.

43:30 Where does stress fit alongside anxiety and fear?

48:15 Advice to someone who has AI anxiety.

Resources + Links

Get a copy of my book - The Anxious Achiever

Watch the podcast on YouTube

Find more resources on our website morraam.com

Follow

Follow me: on LinkedIn @morraaronsmele + Instagram @morraam

Follow Tracy: @tracydennistiwary

Brad Feld on OCD, Depression, and the Courage to Be Honest Nov 13, 2025

Show notes

Stigma loses its power when leaders tell the truth. In this episode, venture investor and Techstars co-founder Brad Feld shares why he went public about depression and OCD, how a 2013 crash led to a decade of deep therapy, and why aligning what you feel, say, and do is a leadership advantage. We talk about the “inappropriate anxiety spikes,” the trap of calling mental health a “superpower,” and the difference between passive and active avoidance. Brad also breaks down a simple dashboard for monitoring burnout, practical somatic cues to watch for, and clear guidance on when to hire a coach versus a therapist. Get ready to rethink performance, protect your team from collateral damage, and lead with courage, clarity, and real agency.

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In this Episode, You Will Learn

00:00 Why did you choose to speak openly about mental health?

09:00 How stigma and shame create a negative feedback loop for founders.

14:30 The irrational links between thoughts and actions that drive compulsion.

18:00 How reframing failure helps you find grace in what doesn’t work out.

20:00 The concept of “passive avoidance” and how it quietly erodes relationships.

26:00 What are the two ways anxiety shows up in leadership?

30:15 How absurdism brings comfort amid uncertainty.

33:30 Why performative passion often hides real insecurity.

37:45 The “anxiety spikes” that jump from 2 to 11 in seconds.

43:00 How ACT therapy helps you feel, accept, and act instead of suppressing emotion.

46:00 The dashboard of green–yellow–red lights to watch your energy in real time.

50:00 Advice to leaders who want to understand how their behavior impacts others.

Resources + Links

Get a copy of my book - The Anxious Achiever

Watch the podcast on YouTube

Find more resources on our website morraam.com

Follow

Follow me: on LinkedIn @morraaronsmele + Instagram @morraam

Follow Brad: @bfeld

The “Losing-My-Sh**” Playlist And Other Tools For High Strivers With Dr. Diana Hill Nov 11, 2025

Show notes

Feeling overworked, overwhelmed, and still unsatisfied? In this episode, psychologist and author Dr. Diana Hill is back to share how to transform anxious over-effort into meaningful action. Based on her new book Wise Effort, Diana breaks down how to align your drive with your values, use your body as a source of wisdom, and stop wasting energy on fear, guilt, and proving yourself. We talk about why achievement alone won’t fulfill you, ways to work through feedback, burnout, and uncertainty. Tune in to learn how to find your genius energy and show up wisely, especially when life feels like it’s falling apart.

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In this Episode, You Will Learn

00:00 Why did you write Wise Effort for high achievers running on empty?

02:00 How to use music as a nervous system regulator and create a “Losing My Sh*t” playlist.

07:45 What Wise Effort really means and how it helps you stop striving on autopilot.

10:15 Why the body holds deeper wisdom than your pros and cons list.

14:15 How to reframe your struggles and build psychological flexibility.

17:30 How to turn your worries into clarity around your values.

24:00 Four questions to challenge unhelpful stories.

33:12 How to prioritize your genius energy and align work with your core values.

41:30 Ways to use feedback as information.

45:45 Tips to cope with layoffs, uncertainty, and fear without toxic positivity.

52:15 Why showing up with dignity creates lasting impact.

Resources + Links

Grab your copy of Dr. Diana Hill’s book Wise Effort HERE

Get a copy of my book - The Anxious Achiever

Watch the podcast on YouTube

Find more resources on our website morraam.com

Follow

Follow me: on LinkedIn @morraaronsmele + Instagram @morraam

Follow Dr. Diana Hill: on LinkedIn @drdianahill + Instagram @drdianahill

Leading For Human Agency With SAP's V.R. Ferose Nov 06, 2025

Show notes

In today’s high-pressure world, leading with love isn’t idealistic, it’s essential. In this episode, I sit down with V.R. Ferose, 26-year SAP leader and Head of SAP Academy for Engineering and founder of the Autism at Work program, to talk about why love as a leadership practice, seeing people clearly, protecting dignity, and amplifying agency, is the most powerful business strategy of all. He shares why trust compounds over time, how to lead with both strength and compassion, and why the future belongs to leaders who lead with heart intelligence, not just artificial intelligence. Get ready to rethink success, rediscover meaning, and learn how leading with love can create workplaces where everyone can thrive.

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In this Episode, You Will Learn

00:00 Meet V.R. Ferose, 26-year SAP leader and Head of SAP Academy for Engineering.

07:00 How history’s great social movements teach modern leadership lessons.

15:45 What “only strength respects strength” really means when facing conflict.

24:00 Why heart intelligence, not AI, is our greatest human advantage.

32:45 How real learning and growth happen through in-person connection.

37:30 How AI is eroding creativity and reflection.

42:45 The link between social comparison and anxiety.

48:45 What is the origin of Autism at Work?

55:00 Why “Autism at Work” began as a choiceless decision.

01:04:00 Why do so many high-achievers feel boxed in and powerless?

Resources + Links

Get a copy of my book - The Anxious Achiever

Watch the podcast on YouTube

Find more resources on our website morraam.com

Follow

Follow me: on LinkedIn @morraaronsmele + Instagram @morraam

Follow V.R. on LinkedIn @ferosevr

What Neurodistinct Professionals Really Think About Their Careers with Dr. Diane Biray Gregorio Nov 04, 2025

Show notes

If you’ve ever wondered how to lead and thrive with a different brain, this conversation will help you feel less alone and better understand your neurodistinct strengths and challenges. I unpack findings from my "Neurostrength survey" taken by 1286 professionals with ADHD, Autism, depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, OCD, learning differences, and other brain differences. I'm joined by sociologist, research scientist, and leadership coach Dr. Diane Biray Gregorio. We cover the real advantages (pattern recognition, creative problem-solving, empathy, hyperfocus), the common friction points (processing speed mismatches, focus, emotional regulation) of someone whose brain works differently at work. You’ll learn practical ways to self-advocate, how to job-craft for your strengths, and a simple framework to design your best workday. You’ll leave with strategies to make thrive at work, get what you need, and build psychologically safe, high-performing teams.

Read the survey report here, for free: https://morraam.com/neurostrength-survey

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In this Episode, You Will Learn

00:00 Science behind thriving at work: breaking down the results of my NeuroStrength survey.

16:15 What we learned about the leaders who responded to our survey.

21:00 Revealing the MYTH that neurodistinct people aren’t good at managing people.

24:30 How many people that completed the survey identified themselves as neurodivergent or neurodistinct?

28:45 How many survey participants who identify as neurodivergent/neurodistinct have been diagnosed?

35:30 Ways having a different brain has impacted careers (from challenges to strengths.)

39:00 Superpowers neurodistinct people have reported that are advantages in the workplace.

43:15 How to self-advocate and set up your environment to perform at your best.

52:30 Common task-related challenges of our survey participants.

57:00 The TAAM framework to best manage your time.

Resources + Links

Get a copy of my book - The Anxious Achiever

Watch the podcast on YouTube

Find more resources on our website morraam.com

Follow

Follow me: on LinkedIn @morraaronsmele + Instagram @morraam

Dr. Diane Biray Gregorio: @drdbgregorio

Self Compassion For Overachievers with Attorney Mark Goldstein & Dr. Kristin Neff Oct 30, 2025

Show notes

Today we’re exploring the skill that ambitious, anxious brains often resist: self-compassion. You’ll hear attorney Mark Goldstein’s candid story of OCD, depression, panic attacks, and the leave of absence that helped him rebuild a career and a life with support, therapy, mindfulness, and (yes) compassion. Then, Dr. Kristin Neff, pioneer of self-compassion research, teaches practical tools you can use today. We cover how to handle rumination, reframe “perfection” into being a “compassionate mess,” and when to turn on fierce self-protection versus tender care. If you hold yourself to impossible standards, this conversation will give you language, strategies, and permission to be human and still perform.

In this Episode, You Will Learn

00:00 Why self-compassion is a performance skill for anxious achievers.

02:00 Learn from Mark Goldstein on perfectionism, OCD, and the billable-hour trap.

05:45 “I couldn’t stop checking”: the 2017 spiral and panic attacks.

09:30 When did you decide you needed help and where did you start?

13:00 Taking a leave of absence, the fear of perception, and the reality of support.

18:45 Reframing “weakness” and treating mental health as a disability.

21:00 Dr. Kristin Neff on why our brains default to self-criticism.

23:30 The hack to turn caregiving inward.

25:15 Tips for practical self-talk (authentic compassion, NOT empty affirmations.)

27:30 When to deploy fierce vs. tender compassion and harnessing anger for protection.

30:00 How to stop rumination.