Stay ConnectedShawn, Josh and Jeff work tirelessly to bring to life the screenplays that Hollywood tried to keep from you! Movies that were never made, but should have been! Movies that were never made and for good reason! Movies that definitely should NOT have been made, but you kind of wish you could see them anyway!
These brave scriptonauts subject themselves to scripts good and bad (mostly bad), acting them out and editorializing for your entertainment!
Copyright: © Copyright Shawn McBee
We pick up with our drug dealer with a heart of gold and his mystery woman after they've gone back to her place for some... wine. We conclude Jericho's tale and move on to talking about the origins of the project and what would have come next, before conversationally meandering all over the place.
This week's guests are Kelly Leveille and Jimie Williams.
Taking a break from pop culture's greatest mis-fires, the gang turns to their own oeuvre, picking a script written by Jimie, based on an idea by him and Shawn.
It centers on the kind of likable drug dealer that idiot screenwriters think exist. Smart, artistic, really concerned with the well-being of their customers... you know, REALISM. This drug dealer's world is turned upside-down when he meets a mysterious woman at a coffee shop (not a Starbucks, though).
This is a relatively quick read, covered in just two episodes. So enjoy making fun of the first half and we'll see you next week for part two!
And, hey, don't forget to subscribe!
Remember the light-hearted wonder of 1982's E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial? Apparently, Stephen Spielberg didn't when, that same year, he wrote a 9 page outline for a sequel, rife with child torture, alien abduction and overtones of intergalactic race war! Oh, you think I'm joking? Then give a listen to our reading of this horrific follow-up to one of the most beloved films of all time. Guest-starring Jimie Williams!
It's been a long road, but we've finally reached the end. Welcome to the last installment of our reading of Beetlejuice Goes Hawaiian!
As Beetlejuice's "Juicifer" rampage continues, Lydia, along with the Beatniks (ugh), the Deetzes and Otho try to get everyone to safety and fight to stop the dreaded Beetlejuice! But how? It's not like the answer to stopping him was clearly established in the first film and even alluded to earlier in this one!
Be prepared for the climactic... well, no. It's not really. Honestly, even with me telling you right now that the ending is entirely anticlimactic, you'll still be astonished at how much of a climax it isn't when it happens. I can even keep talking it up and it's not spoiling a thing. It doesn't matter what I say, you'll never imagine just how tame it actually is. So enjoy this last part!
Next week, we have a tiny one-off for you as a palate cleanser!
And, between now and then, expect a BIG ANNOUNCEMENT from Table Reads! We're very excited! So stay tuned!
Also, subscribe and shit!
THIS IS IT! The moment you've all been waiting for! The PENULTIMATE installment of Beetlejuice Goes Hawaiian!
Okay, I know you're really waiting for it to be fucking over, but this is the only way I can get through this, so let me have it, okay?
ON THE UPSIDE: Beetlejuice finally gets to... Beetle..juicing...? The Ghost with the Most unleashes his full ghostitude! We also learn that screenwriter Jonathan Gems believes Easter Island to be in Hawaii (see above) and we get the most well-written, subtle environmental subtext that Gems can manage. The caveat there being that he is very clearly a VERY bad writer. So keep that in mind. So, without further adieu, please enjoy our 39th episoide, part seven of Beetlejuice Goes Hawaiian.
Also, like us on Facebook, subscribe to the podcast on iTunes or Stitcher or Google Play! OR ALL THREE! FOR SOME REASON!
Welcome back to the Deetz Paradise Resort, where you'll find more than your typical allotment of beachgoing beatniks, fuckable cacti, and culturally ambiguous hawaiian witch doctors!
This week, we tackle part 6 of Beetlejuice Goes Hawaiian by Jonathan Gems. Or it tackles us. Because, whoof. It is rough. This week features the resolution of a love quandrangle between a goth, a ghost, an inaccurately-labeled beatnik, and a catus. Well, a tree. Named Cactus. And I want to be very clear ALL OF THAT IS REAL, I DIDN'T MAKE UP ANY OF IT. It also features, what else? A fucking surf competition. Give it a listen and see if the Fonz turns up. At this point, anything could happen.
Also, please check out our redesigned site at www.tablereadspodcast.com and, special announcement, we're now available on Stitcher AND the Google Play store! If we're not on your favorite podcast platform, let us know and we'll make it happen! With so many options to choose from, you can't possibly have a reason left not to SUBSCRIBE!
Trevor, Shawn and Kelly resume reading of Beetlejuice Goes Hawaiian, in which Jonathan Gems continues to prove how little he understands any of these characters, their motivations, the basic idea of the whole concept or even the art of screenwriting.
There’s a surf competition, a lot of dancing, and a lot of utter fucking nonsense. Join us for part five of our Master Class in why this shit never became a movie.
It’s time to check back in with the Ghost With the Most™ as he once again is hired to perform a Bio-Exorcism of the Deetz family… but this time in Hawaii!
It’s sure to be a fun— I’m lying. It’s awful. Just awful. Come join us in mocking the ever-loving fuck out of it. Guest-Starring Kelly Leviay!
Also, Happy Valentine’s Day!
Please Note: This is actually, really Part 4… if you donwload the file, please do not be confused by the name of the file, indicating this as part 3. That is incorrect.
This week on Table Reads, we continue our very-serious and respectful read of Beetlejuice Goes Hawaiian with the gravitas it truly deserves.
As Lydia struggles to overcome the burden of her tedious family, she makes friends with some beatniks, proving conclusively that the screenwriter has no idea what a beatnik is.
And MAYBE Beetlejuice turns up somewhere. ou’ll have to listen to find out for sure.
Please Note: This is actually, really Part 3… if you donwload the file, please do not be confused by the name of the file, indicating this as part 4. That is incorrect.
The Ghost with the Most is Back! …ish.
Join us for Part 2 of Beetlejuice Goes Hawaiian and learn what happens when the baddest Bio-exprcist to ever tame a sand worm visits a tropical paradise!
That is, if the script can move the story along that far.
With special guest, Kelly Leviay!
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