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Shameless Leadership

Welcome to Shameless Leadership! This show is for women, transgender people, non-binary folks, and allies who are committed to advancing their leadership and the leadership of those around them. In this space, we believe everyone deserves to feel seen, heard, valued, and supported. Our mission is to help you foster these feelings within your own circles of influence to build trust, psychological safety, and a culture of belonging.
In each episode, we dive into essential topics impacting women in leadership – everything from shutting down your inner critic and imposter syndrome to overcoming perfectionism to using your voice in new ways to advocate for yourself, your ideas, and other folks carrying marginalized identities. You’ll hear practical tips, effective strategies, and inspiring stories that will not only enhance your leadership skills but also broaden your perspective to become a more confident, thoughtful, and empathetic leader.
Our stories come from people carrying identities who are often underrepresented, underestimated, and excluded. By sharing their experiences, we aim to provide you with invaluable lessons that will transform your leadership journey. We are thrilled to have you join this community of Shameless Leaders who are actively creating a world where everyone, regardless of gender, can intentionally lead through a more curious, compassionate, and inclusive lens.

Latest Episodes:

89: The Anti-Resolution Revolution Jan 02, 2017

Show notes

Have you noticed the Anti Resolution Revolution? I’m a big fan. Huge.

Quite frankly, resolutions suck. They are too big. They are too vague. They are not “bite sized” enough. They are framed as punishments. They are designed to make us fail. Every year….

If you really want to improve your life you have to look at tiny habits. You have to implement small changes that build confidence and improve motivation. You need to be excited and positive about the potential and possibility that lie ahead of you.

In this episode, I share:

Why resolutions suck
Why your brain literally cannot handle your resolution
Why habits are better than resolutions and how they are totally different in nature
What 3 steps you must take to make a new habit successful
Tips to start a new habit, whether you want to eat better, lose weight, be less stressed, manage time better, or just generally love your life more

Links Mentioned:

Article: The Science of New Years Resolutions: Why 88% Fail and How To Make Them Work

SMA Ep 82: The Power of Recency and Frequency

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88: Elizabeth DiAlto Untame Yourself Dec 28, 2016

Show notes

Elizabeth DiAlto is known for her raw, honest and grounded approach to self-help and spirituality, She is the founder of the Wild Soul Movement, author of Untame Yourself, and host of the popular Untame The Wild Soul podcast. She’s been a teacher, leader, speaker, coach and trainer to groups and individuals for 13+ years and she also consults organizations ranging from start ups to large corporations such as Dove UK.

Elizabeth and I met through our work in the fitness industry. However, she left the fitness industry a few years ago to untame her wild soul and, ultimately, an entire new life for herself. I was so excited to reconnect with her and hear how she made the transition between career paths, and interpersonal relationships, and how she started living a life that was much more authentically hers.

Listen in to hear Elizabeth share:

Why it’s important to work IN, rather than work OUT
What YES feels like in your body, what NO feels like in your body – and how to start uncovering the truth that lies in your gut
The difference between the masculine arts & feminine arts and where you fit
Why it’s ok to change your mind and be inconsistent
How everything you’ve ever needed has always been inside of you

Links Mentioned:

Book: Awakening Shakti

Book/Cards: Ask your Guides

Book: Outrageous Openness

Free Resources: Untameyourself.com/companion

Podcast: Untame the Wild Soul

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87: 2016 Did Not Suck Dec 26, 2016

Show notes

You can look back on 2016 as the BEST year or the WORST year. If you choose to look back on it as the BEST year, you get to own every amazing experience you had – the moments when you pushed your limits, reached a new high, felt magic, saw beauty, learned something new, had a shift in perspective, totally rocked a challenge, modeled strength to your kid(s), and felt power in your core being.

If you choose to look at 2016 as the WORST year (as I see a lot of people doing on social media), you negate and dismiss everything above. You walk away from an entire year of your life in defeat, without power.

I get it – 2016 threw us for a loop. A big effing loop. I’m right there with you. My year did not go as planned. I’m not pregnant right now. Our next president will not embody a single value of mine. I see pain and suffering at every turn, nationally and internationally.

BUT – I did a lot of great things this year. So did you. I grew this year. So did you. I found silver linings that I never even thought to look for. You can too. I am better for 2016. So are you.

Let’s celebrate everything 2016 was to us. Let’s have a freakin' party. Let’s own the heck out of our wins. I deserve that. You deserve that.

Cheers to a BIG year of challenges and growth and newfound strength & pride. Let’s carry all of this forward into 2017, shall we? We ROCK. Every damn day. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

Tune in to hear my biggest wins of the year, in spite of some of the biggest losses of my life.

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86: Elise Buie - Thrive Through Divorce Dec 21, 2016

Show notes

Elise is a high conflict divorce attorney who also has her own divorce story. Elise’s divorce involved Hurricane Katrina, multiple moves around the country, and, ultimately, a co-parenting plan where she lives with her kids and new husband in Seattle and her ex-husband comes out to visit and live with them one week each month.

After working through her own divorce, Elise decided to dedicate her law practice to helping other families thrive through divorce. Listen in to hear Elise share:

The biggest mistakes most lawyers make in representing people in divorce
The power and advantages to mediation
How to stay out of court, save a ton of money, and get what is truly best for your children
What true co-parenting looks like
The truth - you can be a horrible spouse and a great parent

Links Mentioned:

Book: The Co Parent Handbook, by Karen Bonnell

Book: Sisters in law: How Sandra Day O’Connor and Ruth Bader Ginsburg Went to the Supreme Court and Changed the World

Blog: (Lagniappe) http://www.elisebuiefamilylaw.com/blog

Website: http://www.elisebuiefamilylaw.com/

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85: My People Pleaser Relapse Dec 19, 2016

Show notes

I recently had 2 People Pleaser relapses. One was just for a day. One was for a couple months. Why is it so hard to stop pleasing all. the. people???

I know that as an Upholder (see article below), being a people pleaser may well be something I always struggle with. But, even if it’s a life long challenge, I will kick off 2017 recognizing where I fell short in 2016. I will recognize what I lost by prioritizing other peoples’ needs before my own.

In 2017 I will:

Say NO more
Say YES less
Stand up for myself
Tune in to my body and really listen
Push myself to keep firm boundaries around my time, money, space, goals
Start following my intuition in terms of where I really want to go in life over the next few years

What will you do to really listen to yourself and your needs as you prepare to enter a new year?

Links Mentioned:

Article: The Four Tendencies – What Kind of Person Are You?, by Gretchen Rubin

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84: Nikki Closser - Getting Moms in Front of the Camera Dec 14, 2016

Show notes

Nikki Closser is a Seattle and Michigan based photographer and a new mom. She is madly in love with her work and with her baby. Nikki always knew she would be a working mom. She knew her passion for her work would not diminish in motherhood. However, she didn’t expect her passion for motherhood to be so strong. She admits that while she loves her work, motherhood is magical, and she doesn’t know why she put it off for so long.

Nikki’s work photographing women is phenomenal. I had the immense pleasure of doing a shoot with her about a year ago and felt an immediate connection to her and everything she stands for in womanhood, entrepreneurship and motherhood (even though she was only a few months pregnant when we met). She also might love wine as much as me – so we’re basically soul mates.

The way Nikki reaches women through photography is breathtaking. Every woman she works with is made to feel like a true supermodel. Nikki is kind and gentle, but assertive and confident in her work, putting women at ease the moment they enter her studio. Doing a shoot with her is an amazing life experience I would recommend to any woman.

Listen in to hear Nikki share:

Here first Mama Bear moment – just seconds after her son was born
How she and her husband envisioned and created a travel lifestyle with Van
How she dives deep into work and into motherhood – but doesn’t let the two converge
What she sees through her lens as she photographs a woman
Why she thinks every woman deserves a lavish photoshoot and gorgeous photos of themselves

Links Mentioned:

Nikki Closser: http://nikkiclosser.com/

Sue Bryce: http://suebryce.com/

Nikki on Facebook

Nikki on Instagram

Book: Monique in the Mango Rains

SMA Ep 54: Rebecca Michi Children’s Sleep Consultant

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83: The Power of Recency and Frequency Dec 12, 2016

Show notes

It is human nature to keep doing the things we’ve done most recently and most frequently.

Showering daily
Drinking coffee
Getting in a workout
Indulging in sugar
Drinking that big ass glass of wine

As you build new habits, the same holds true. If you starting getting up early to workout, once you’ve done it a few times (made it recent & frequent), you’re much more likely to keep doing it.

When you are conscious of the concept of recency & frequency, you can really prove your power in establishing new habits. This can be extremely liberating and assist you in building momentum and confidence with new habits and routines.

To improve the recency & frequency of desired behaviors, habits and routines, you can (and should):

Plan behaviors
Track behaviors as you do them
Track wins
Plan rewards
Self Monitor
Always practice discomfort

Listen in to hear how to implement all this and use it in the final weeks of 2016 and as you cruise into 2017.

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82: Debbi Reber - On Differently Wired Kids Dec 07, 2016

Show notes

3 years ago Debbie and her family moved from Seattle to the Netherlands. At that time, Debbie and her husband made the decision to homeschool their son Asher, who is “differently wired”. Asher is profoundly gifted and has ADHD and Aspergers. He is extremely intelligent, curious and compassionate – in short, an amazing kid.

When Debbie decided to homeschool Asher, she stepped aside from her traditional author role and began a authoring a new story – the story of the life she and Asher were building as they navigated through the huge transitions of an international move and A LOT of togetherness in their homeschooling adventure.

Through this journey Debbie and Asher created TiLT – an incredible online resource for families with differently wired kids.

Listen in to hear Debbie share:

The advantages and challenges of homeschooling a differently wired child (in a new country)
The power of personal development for kids – and how to get them started
How to lean in to your child’s uniqueness rather than fight it or try to fix it
Steps to creating an impenetrable bond with your child who is differently wired than you

Links Mentioned:

SMA Ep 59: How to Create Your Own Miracle Morning

Carol Dweck’s TED Talk: “The Power of Believing That You Can Improve”

TiLT Parenting: http://www.tiltparenting.com

TiLT Parenting on Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/tiltparenting

Debbie’s Author Site: http://www.debbiereber.com

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81: How to Make Happier Holidays Dec 05, 2016

Show notes

The holidays can be fun. So fun.

Friends. Family. Food. Drinks.

Giving and receiving.

Joy and magic.

The holidays can also be stressful, isolating, depleting and sad.

Loss, regret, and defeat can feel amplified at this time of year.

Whether you are filled with holiday cheer or trudging through the days with holiday blues, here are 6 ways your can have happier holidays:

Give
Have a budget
Be ok with ok
Rewrite history
Create moments that can become traditions
Know thy family
Plan your partying

You can read the full show notes at www.shamelessmom.com.

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80: Michelle Duncan-Wilson: The Not-Meant-To-Mother Mom Nov 30, 2016

Show notes

Michelle Duncan-Wilson became a mom for the first time at 17 years old. She now has a 17 year old daughter and two sons, ages 8 and 3.

Michelle will tell you she was “not meant to be a mother”. While she is now thriving it took her years to arrive. She had to find her mothering soul and give it some room to grow.

In this episode Michelle shares:

What life was like as a teen mom
How she crammed 40 years of life experience into her first 25 years of life
What she wants her 17 year old daughter to know about being a 17 year old mom
How motherhood has been different, but not easier, in her thirties
Why we are not meant to mold our children, but to accept them in any shape they are
Why mothering pain is not for nothing
How she is currently thriving in “evolution through motherhood”

Links Mentioned:

Michelle’s Website: soulworkformoms.com

Facebook Group: soulworkformoms.com/community

Instagram: @soulworkformoms

Book: Carry On, Warrior by Glennon Doyle Menton

Book: Love Warrior by Glennon Doyle Melton

Book: Tears to Triumph by Marianne Willamson

Book: Shift into Freedom by Loch Kelly

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