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Shameless Leadership

Welcome to Shameless Leadership! This show is for women, transgender people, non-binary folks, and allies who are committed to advancing their leadership and the leadership of those around them. In this space, we believe everyone deserves to feel seen, heard, valued, and supported. Our mission is to help you foster these feelings within your own circles of influence to build trust, psychological safety, and a culture of belonging.
In each episode, we dive into essential topics impacting women in leadership – everything from shutting down your inner critic and imposter syndrome to overcoming perfectionism to using your voice in new ways to advocate for yourself, your ideas, and other folks carrying marginalized identities. You’ll hear practical tips, effective strategies, and inspiring stories that will not only enhance your leadership skills but also broaden your perspective to become a more confident, thoughtful, and empathetic leader.
Our stories come from people carrying identities who are often underrepresented, underestimated, and excluded. By sharing their experiences, we aim to provide you with invaluable lessons that will transform your leadership journey. We are thrilled to have you join this community of Shameless Leaders who are actively creating a world where everyone, regardless of gender, can intentionally lead through a more curious, compassionate, and inclusive lens.

Latest Episodes:

562: Acknowledging and Assessing Negative Thought Patterns Jul 12, 2021

Show notes

I’m not gonna lie, you might feel totally called out by today’s episode. But I think and hope it will ultimately really help you to see how your brain is holding you back at times.

Here’s the deal… You likely have a bunch of negative thought loops running through your brain all.the.time. Know that you are not alone in this. Not even a little bit. Also, know that these loops that just keep playing on repeat are so dangerous over time.

They keep you small.

They keep you quiet.

They keep you sad and frustrated and exhausted.

They keep you from enjoying some of the best parts of your life.

They keep you from seeing what your life could be.

So, let’s shut them up, shall we?!

In today's episode, I talk you through 7 common negative thought patterns I learned about from Dr. David Burns:

All or nothing thinking
Overgeneralization
Magnification/Catastrophizing
Emotional Reasoning
Should Statements
Rumination
Overthinking

I’ll admit, when I first learned of these I was like, “DAMN, HE LIVES ALL THE WAY IN MY HEAD.” But I also felt a little relief in knowing that the loops in my head are common loops and they can be retrained, or rerouted, if you will.

Listen in to dig into these common negative thought patterns so you can learn how to retrain your brain in more functional and productive ways.

Links mentioned:

Join my free workshop, 5 Ways to Shine Like A Mother
Book: Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy by Dr David Burns

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561: Mia Hemstad: How To Combat Mom Burnout With Sustainable Self-Nourishment Jul 07, 2021

Show notes

Mia Hemstad is a wife and a mom of 2 little kiddos. Mia works as a Paid Family Leave and mental health advocate—writing and speaking online and advocating at the policy level for systemic change. After surviving postpartum depression and anxiety twice, and later being diagnosed with PTSD and depression, Mia is passionate about helping mothers leave the burnout cycle behind through her writing, speaking and coaching to support moms in navigating self-care and mental well-being in motherhood.

Mia was one of the speakers during the Shameless Mom Con Collective this past spring. As she gave her impassioned talk, all of our attendees saw parts of themselves - the parts that most folks don’t talk about. The messy parts. The ugly parts. The parts full of tears, anger, and even rage. The parts that might lead to a diagnosis of depression or anxiety. The parts that might require medication.

Mia’s talk was so powerful and also full of tactical advice, so I decided I had to share it here - where more of you who struggle with mom burnout can put her tips into action in order to start healing the parts of yourself that might have you feeling like you’re barely hanging on by a thread.

Links mentioned:

Get my info about upcoming events and workshops
Connect with Mia and her resources: Mia Hemstad
Follow Mia here: YouTube | Facebook | Instagram

Thank you to our sponsor:

Talkspace: To match with your perfect therapist for a fraction of the price of traditional therapy, go to talkspace.com, Make sure to use the code SHAMELESS to get $100 off your first month and show your support for the show.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

560: How Your Thoughts Lead To Action (and Inaction) Jul 05, 2021

Show notes

You have anywhere from 6,000-60,000 thoughts per day, depending on which research study you trust most.

Let’s just take the low estimate of 6,000 thoughts per day and consider the impact of that many thoughts on the course of your day.

We know that our thoughts determine our feelings & emotions which then determine our actions.

Therefore, at least 6,000 times per day, you have a thought that makes you take action - or not.

Some of our thoughts make us brave and bold. They give us permission to take courageous action and then we bask in the glory of proving our strength and power.

Other thoughts make us take rash action - sometimes causing harm to ourselves or others. This can send us into a downward spiral of negative follow up thoughts:

What was I thinking?

I can’t believe I was so stupid.

I’m so embarrassed.

I am completely ashamed.

And other thoughts make us freeze. We decide that we aren’t ready or qualified to be courageous. Not yet. Not today.

New awareness of your 6,000 - 60,000 thoughts per day might feel overwhelming, if not downright daunting. But, here’s the thing…

You are 100% capable of becoming a better thought manager. This means you can manage your thoughts in order to manage your actions. YAY.

Listen in to hear how your thoughts determine your actions and how you can become a better thought manager starting right now.

Links mentioned:

Download my Shameless Motivational Coloring Book

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

559: Delphine Carter: The Power Moms Bring To Corporate Culture Jun 30, 2021

Show notes

Delphine Carter is the Founder and CEO of Boulo Solutions, a career matching service that helps women stay in and return to the workforce. Boulo has now helped over 1,000 women and has generated over $1M in revenue. Delphine was able to fund Boulo’s $500,000 seed stage while working and raising children during the pandemic.

I asked Delphine to join me on the show because of the massive shift we are seeing around moms and the workplace right now. Millions of moms have left the workforce in the last year. Many millions more have had to navigate new terms of working from home or working in other creative ways during the pandemic.

We are at a critical time for moms in the workplace. There is the chance to totally renegotiate what work looks like for everyone and moms are poised to work in more flexible ways than ever before. Delphine is helping make that happen.

Listen in to hear Delphine share:

Her realization that “I could not be whole without my work”
How she helps genius moms get seen professionally
How Boulo helps moms qualify themselves for jobs that are a perfect fit for their specific needs
Why Boulo only works with companies that create flexible working environments for moms and dads
How forward-thinking managers need to shift expectations around goals vs time invested on a job or task
The benefits of having moms in C Suite position
The significance of empathy in corporate culture
The challenges around childcare post pandemic when 40% of childcare centers nationwide have closed and what is open is ridiculously expensive
The exact conversation you can have with your employer to ask for a more flexible schedule
Why we must erase the phrase “just a mom” from all vernacular

Links mentioned:

Help us help you by filling out the Shameless Summer Survey
Connect with Delphine: Boulo Solutions
Connect with Delphine on LinkedIn
Connect with Delphine on Facebook
Connect with Delphine in Instagram

Thank you to our sponsor:

Talkspace: To match with your perfect therapist for a fraction of the price of traditional therapy, go to talkspace.com, Make sure to use the code SHAMELESS to get $100 off your first month and show your support for the show.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

558: 5 Steps To Get Out Of Your Own Way Jun 28, 2021

Show notes

For the entire month of June, I have been talking about how you might be getting in your own way, why you might be getting in your own way, and how procrastination & perfectionism are keeping you stuck. This week we will wrap up the month by talking about 5 steps you can take to get out of your own way.

Look, we all get stuck. We all struggle with self doubt, analysis paralysis, and perfectionism from time to time. We overthink, over worry, over research, and over plan because we want to do things well - we want to make the BEST choices or make the BEST decision.

When we are stuck, sometimes we cannot see our way out. We cannot see the next step. This can feel scary and stifling and can even shut us down completely.

Today, I’m going to share 5 steps you can take to get out of your own way and stop staying stuck. These simple strategies are tools that will get you moving and KEEP you moving as you take action in the direction of your dreams.

I’m delighted to be wrapping up the first month of my Summer Series. In month 2 (July), we will dive into a new theme: Retrain Your Brain. You definitely don’t want to miss this content!

Link mentioned:

Help us help you by filling out the Shameless Summer Survey

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

557: Irina Gonzalez: Managing Sobriety And Anxiety As A New Mom In A Pandemic Jun 23, 2021

Show notes

Irina Gonzalez is a Latina, bisexual, sober Shameless Mom. She is also an editor & freelance writer covering parenting, recovery, and Latinx culture. Currently, she is the Content Marketing Manager at Tempest, a membership program that empowers you to live alcohol-free. She is also the creator of the Pandemic Mama podcast, which brings you real conversations about having a baby during COVID-19 times. Her work has appeared in over 50 publications, including The Washington Post, O! The Oprah Magazine, Parents, and more. She is a new resident of Denver, where she lives with her husband, spunky toddler, and their fur babies.

I recently heard an interview my dear friend Laura Cathcart Robbins did with Irina and I immediately knew I wanted to ask Irina to join me in the Shameless Mom Academy. She is brilliant in so many ways and extremely generous in the ways she shares her stories. I think this conversation will open your eyes and inspire you to look at some of your coping skills to assess what’s working and what’s not - and what coping mechanisms might help you the most.

Listen in to hear Irina share:

Why balance is a “damn bad idea”
How she’s juggling being back at work full time, caring for her 14 month old, and finding a sense of self
The unique intersections of her identities as a Latina, bisexual, sober, mother and writer
Her journey into sobriety
The labels of “alcoholic” vs “alcohol use disorder”
Why the 12 step recovery framework doesn’t resonate with her
How moms are not being supported by Mommy Wine Culture
The connections she made between her alcohol use and anxiety
8 coping mechanisms she’s using to deal with anxiety and managing her mental health in a pandemic
How she’s taking pride in “showing up as who I am and being vocal about it!”

Links mentioned:

Download my free Shameless Motivational Coloring Book
Connect with Irina
Irina’s Podcast: Pandemic Mama
Book: Quit Like a Woman by Holly Whitaker
Book: Why We Sleep by Matthew Walker
Podcast: Forever 35
Irina on Instagram and here

Thank you to our sponsor:

Thrive: Start thriving and help women in need today by going to com/ThriveCausemetics.com/shameless for 15% off your first purchase!

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

556: How Procrastination & Perfectionism Are Keeping You Stuck Jun 21, 2021

Show notes

A couple years ago, I had a major AHA. I was reading Jon Acuff’s book, FINISHED, and he was talking about perfectionism and the connection between perfectionism and procrastination.

Society tells you that procrastination is a sign of laziness or a lack of commitment. Society makes procrastinators feel like crap.

But Jon pointed out that procrastination can often be a form of perfectionism.

We already know that perfectionism keeps us in our own way - BIG TIME. It prevents us from starting and even more so from finishing. Same with procrastination. We often procrastinate because we are spinning in perfectionism:

What is the next right step?

Should I go with option A or option B?

What if I can’t finish?

What if I can’t even start?

What if I fail and other people judge me?

What if, what if, what if????

Any of this sound familiar?

All of this month, we are talking about getting out of your own way. Perfectionism is a huge way that we get in our own way and procrastination is often a major symptom of perfectionism.

Listen in to learn more about how perfectionism and procrastination might be keeping you super stuck in your own way.

Links mentioned:

Download my free Shameless Motivational Coloring Book

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

555: Laura Cathcart Robbins: Why We Must Make Space For Women's Stories Jun 16, 2021

Show notes

Laura Cathcart Robbins is an author, writer, podcast host, mother of Miles and Justin, Hon’s GF, dedicated inclusionist, disruptor, thought leader, ally, volunteer, storyteller, public speaker, and often the only one in the room.

She is also a freelance culture writer and host of the popular podcast, The Only One In The Room, living in Studio City, California. Her recent articles in HuffPo and The Temper on the subjects of race, recovery, and divorce have garnered her worldwide acclaim. She currently sits on the advisory boards of the San Diego Writer’s Festival and the Outliers HQ podcast Festival.

This is a super special conversation from inside the Shameless Mom Con Collective. I invited Laura to come have a conversation with me about sharing women's stories, as we have collectively shared hundreds and hundred of womens’ stories over the last few years. The power of sharing our stories is so significant and I knew Laura would have a lot of insight into this. I hope this conversation inspires you to share your stories in the spaces you feel safe to do so.

Listen in to hear us share:

What inspired us to start making space for other women’s stories
What we’ve learned after sharing hundreds of women's stories over the last few years
Some of our favorite stories that we’ve shared on our podcasts
Why we are all more powerful when we start sharing our stories
How to create safe spaces for women to share stories

Links mentioned:

Download my free Shameless Motivational Coloring Book
Podcast: The Only One In The Room
Connect with Laura: theonlyonepod.com

Thank you to our sponsors:

Hello Fresh: Go to HelloFresh.com/shameless12 and use code shameless12 for 12 free meals, including free shipping!
Happy Dance: Right now, SHAMELESS listeners get 15% off their first Happy Dance order. But only when you go to Doahappydance.com/SHAMELESS.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

554: 5 Reasons You Might Be Getting In Your Own Way Jun 14, 2021

Show notes

Last week we kicked off our June theme, Get Out Of Your Own Way, discussing 7 ways you might be getting in your own way. This week we are digging deeper to explore WHY you might be getting in your own way.

The WHY matters! If you can recognize why you’re getting in your own way, you will have the power to see patterns and threads that you likely repeat throughout your life - likely keeping you feeling stuck at times.

In this episode, we will dig into everything from social conditioning to self limiting beliefs to self doubt to trauma - all of which can play a major role in keeping you stuck.

In looking inward at your WHY, you will begin to see how you can heal some of these patterns and start to build new, more functional patterns - which will ultimately propel you forward.

Links Mentioned:

Download my free motivational coloring book

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

553: Elizabeth DiAlto: How to Embody Your Wild Soul Jun 09, 2021

Show notes

Known for her raw, honest, and grounded approach to self-help and spirituality, Elizabeth DiAlto specializes in helping women embody self love, healing, wholeness, and liberation. Her body of work has evolved out of 12+ years of experience across several fields including: Fitness, Self-Help, Wellness, Spirituality, Coaching, Personal Development, and Healing -- the last seven of which she’s spent helping women untame themselves.

Everything she does is also informed by her own healing and education around embodiment, energy medicine, self love, collective liberation, boundaries, body image, trauma, healthy relationships, and identity. Elizabeth is the creator of Wild Soul Movement and the Wild Soul Archetypes Quiz, founder of The Institute for EMBODIED Living, and host of the EMBODIED podcast - which has been downloaded over 3 million times.

I’ve known Elizabeth for over 10 years. Watching the evolution of her work has been incredible. She shares her growth in such beautiful ways - that allow you to grow within her. You’re going to love this conversation.

Listen in to hear Elizabeth share:

The importance of listening inward to gain self knowledge and expand your perception of what you think you’re capable of
The energetic exchange that is an archetype
Why learning about your Wild Soul Archetype will help you lean more into who you already are but might not be able to see yet
The importance of healing, wholeness and liberation for all moms
Her 5 part framework for self love
Why it’s important and LIBERATING to identify what you suck at
Specific practices to get grounded and get out of your mind and into your body

Links mentioned:

Connect with Elizabeth
Take the Wild Soul Archetype Quiz
Listen to Elizabeth’s Podcast: Embodied
Download the Embodiment Bible: Embodiment Bible
Elizabeth on Instagram
Elizabeth on YouTube
Elizabeth on Facebook

Thank you to our sponsors:

Talkspace: To match with your perfect therapist for a fraction of the price of traditional therapy, go to talkspace.com, Make sure to use the code SHAMELESS to get $100 off your first month and show your support for the show.
Lovevery: Free shipping at lovevery.com/shamelessand use the code SHAMELESS at checkout.
Ana Luisa: Go treat yourself and your loved ones and use my code SHAMELESS to get 10% off at https://www.analuisa.com/shameless.

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