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Shameless Leadership — Government & Organizations
Shameless Leadership

Welcome to Shameless Leadership! This show is for women, transgender people, non-binary folks, and allies who are committed to advancing their leadership and the leadership of those around them. In this space, we believe everyone deserves to feel seen, heard, valued, and supported. Our mission is to help you foster these feelings within your own circles of influence to build trust, psychological safety, and a culture of belonging.
In each episode, we dive into essential topics impacting women in leadership – everything from shutting down your inner critic and imposter syndrome to overcoming perfectionism to using your voice in new ways to advocate for yourself, your ideas, and other folks carrying marginalized identities. You’ll hear practical tips, effective strategies, and inspiring stories that will not only enhance your leadership skills but also broaden your perspective to become a more confident, thoughtful, and empathetic leader.
Our stories come from people carrying identities who are often underrepresented, underestimated, and excluded. By sharing their experiences, we aim to provide you with invaluable lessons that will transform your leadership journey. We are thrilled to have you join this community of Shameless Leaders who are actively creating a world where everyone, regardless of gender, can intentionally lead through a more curious, compassionate, and inclusive lens.

Latest Episodes:

582: How I Manage Anxiety #everydamnday Sep 20, 2021

Show notes

Last May, as we approached the end of Mental Health Awareness Month, I decided to share my own story around mental health and, specifically, around my diagnoses of PTSD and General Anxiety Disorder.

I heard from so many of you who could relate to my story. A large number of those of you who reached out to say “me too” also shared that you struggled with the same diagnoses.

Given this feedback, I thought it might be helpful to share what treatment/management modalities have helped me the most since being diagnosed.

Overall, my diagnoses have given me so much clarity. They have solidified who I am in so many ways. I really understand why my brain works the way it does and how I can use this in my favor. This has been such a huge relief.

As I share some of my tools in this episode, I cover everything from medication to exercise to calendar management to my precious morning coffee routine. Whether or not you share my diagnoses, I think you’ll find some of these tools essential to managing your mental health as we continue to navigate the state of the world.

If you have any feedback or need any support, please reach out. I would be honored to be a part of your healing journey.

Links Mentioned:

Join our free Hope, Happiness and Mental Health Challenge
SMA Ep 544: My Mental Health Diagnosis

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581: Jessica Frew: Living Boldly Through Marriage, Coming Out, Divorce & Remarriage Sep 15, 2021

Show notes

Jessica Frew is a wife, ex-wife, mom, stepmom, and BOLD action taker. She has a successful podcast called “Husband in Law” that she records with her husband, Matt, and her ex-husband, Steve. Together they are sharing their stories of love, marriage, coming out, divorce, remarriage, and co-parenting to help others know they are not alone. They also co-own The BOLD Logic. A company devoted to helping people go from living in an “I should” mindset to taking BOLD action toward keeping and reclaiming their sense of self. Jessica is a firm believer that by knowing and understanding what it is you really want in life you can BOLDly create a life you love, no matter what your circumstances.

Listen in to hear Jessica share:

The process of finding out her husband was gay a year and a half into her marriage
How she, her ex-husband, and her current husband have owned and shared their story in a way that helps other couples
What a mixed orientation marriage is and how it works for different couples
The disservice we do to our children when we hold a narrow view of what marriage and family look like
What it’s like to be a member of a Mormon church and have a family that looks drastically different from a typical Mormon family
How she knew when to follow her intuition vs letting her ego go
How she navigated the hardest early years of her second marriage and the truth about hard seasons in marriage
The importance of healthy boundaries that bring others in - not just setting boundaries as defensive armor
How she listens to herself when things don’t go as planned, as well as the specific questions she asks herself in times of turmoil

Links mentioned:

Join my free Hope, Happiness & Mental Health Challenge
Podcast: Husband In Law
Jessica on IG: @husbandinlaw
Resources and Journal: The Boldlogic

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580: Stop Making Other People More Comfortable Sep 13, 2021

Show notes

How often have you made yourself smaller because you didn’t want to make other people feel uncomfortable? You didn’t want to outshine someone, you didn’t want to hold someone responsible, you didn’t want to make someone take a closer look at themself?

Perhaps you find yourself keeping your voice quiet and small because you are worried that your louder, bigger voice would make too much noise for another person.

Sometimes it is absolutely appropriate to make space for others. But sometimes the space you are making for others is at your own expense. That is not appropriate.

If you are an over-giver or a people pleaser, you probably know well the pain and exhaustion of tiptoeing around someone else. You know the resentment that comes with biting your tongue and taking someone else’s crap. You know the regret that comes with letting someone say or do something gross and not calling them on it.

I’m giving you permission to use your voice more loudly, more clearly, and more frequently.

I’m inviting you to set better boundaries that keep the right people out of your life and invite the right people in on your terms. This is about you having clarity around what you stand for and what you stand against. This is about knowing who you are and who you want to give your energy to. This is about letting other people be responsible for themselves instead of you feeling like you must keep them comfortable at all times.

In today’s episode I walk you through a handful of situations in which you might want to consider how you’re sacrificing yourself in order to make others more comfortable - and how to stop doing that.

Links Mentioned:

Join my free Hope, Happiness & Mental Health Challenge

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579: Nicole Lynn Lewis: Navigating College as a Black Teen Mom Sep 08, 2021

Show notes

Nicole Lynn Lewis is a mom of 4, a social entrepreneur, and the founder of the nonprofit Generation Hope. As a teen mother, she put herself through the College of William & Mary, starting as a freshman when her daughter was just three months old. She has been named a CNN Hero and won the Roslyn S. Jaffe Award. She has appeared on CNN, NBC Nightly News, “Good Morning America,” and her journey has been covered in the Washington Post, Baltimore Sun, TeenVogue, Chronicle for Higher Education, and others. Her book "PREGNANT GIRL: A Story of Teen Pregnancy, College, and Creating a Better Future for Young Families" is out now.

Nicole’s story is going to open your eyes to what it’s like to be a Black teen mom in college, as well as all the ways our current college system is set up to ensure success only for its most privileged students.

Listen in to hear Nicole share:

Her mission to write Pregnant Girl - in order help society have a better understanding of teen pregnancy
Her experience going to college and living on campus as a Black teen mom
Why it’s so critical that we stop hiding, shaming, and punishing teen parents by marginalizing them and taking resources from them
How to support the 25% of our college students who are young parents
The stereotypes we hold against teen parents - and the truths behind them
How precarious and isolating it is to be a teen mom in college and the toll it takes on mental health
How teen parents and students of color have to constantly prove their worthiness to get ahead - in ways students of privileged never do
The racist systems and policies that keep parents of color from entering and graduating from college
How her non-profit, Generation Hope, supports college students financially and emotionally
Why Pregnant Girl is a must read for any teen mom and anyone who carries privilege

Links mentioned:

Join my Hope Happiness and Mental Health Challenge
Connect with Generation Hope
Book: PREGNANT GIRL: A Story of Teen Pregnancy, College, and Creating a Better Future for Young Families
Nicole on Twitter and Instagram: @supportgenhope and @nicolelynnlewis

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578: How to Calm the Chaos & Clutter in Your Head Sep 06, 2021

Show notes

The chaos & clutter are real. Not just in our homes, but in our heads, my friends.

As we continue to navigate the most challenging and relentless season of most of our lives, it is easy to let our minds get the best of us.

The overwhelm is real. The fear is palpable. The stress is justified.

It is in these moments that our minds tend to run away without our permission. We go to worst case scenarios. We write stories with horrific endings. We let all our wiring go haywire as we imagine how bad things could get.

As I’ve been on coaching calls with clients over the last couple weeks, we have been working on calming the mental chaos & clutter. Because, even under the hardest circumstances, you get to choose how you manage your thoughts and how you see your position of power in sticky (if not terrifying) situations.

In today’s episode, I’ll walk you through 6 questions to ask yourself in order to calm the chaos and clear the clutter in your head. This will allow you to create space for “what is true and what is beautiful” (as Glennon Doyle teaches us) in those moments that are keeping you stuck in overwhelm right now.

Links Mentioned:

Join my Hope Happiness and Mental Health Challenge

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577: Andrea Owen: Make Some Noise Sep 01, 2021

Show notes

Andrea Owen is the author of 3 books, a global speaker, certified life coach, and hell raiser who helps high-achieving women maximize unshakeable confidence, and master resilience. She has taught hundreds of thousands of women tools and strategies to be able to empower themselves to live their most kick-ass life through speaking, her books, coaching, and her wildly popular podcast, Make Some Noise, with close to 3 million downloads.

Andrea has become one of my favorite COVID voxer buddies. When she told me about her newest book, Make Some Noise: Speak Your Mind and Own Your Strength I immediately told her she had to come back on the show. Andrea talks as fast and as loud as me - so buckle up, friends. This convo is fire.

Listen in to hear Andrea share:

Why she decided to write her book, Make Some Noise, in this pivotal moment in history
The reality of women fearing shining too bright
The solution to start taking up space and start shining (a little) more
The questions to ask yourself if you feel yourself hesitating to take up space
How we fall into internalized misogyny
How to talk about other people from a place of curiosity instead of judgement and gossip
The 4 steps to start unlearning
How she built an entire relationship while ignoring her intuition - and ultimately ended up in her enabling her partners drug addiction and doing drug deals in Mexico
Why women’s empowerment starts with women asking for what they want

Links mentioned:

Join for info on my Hope, Happiness & Mental Health Challenge: shamelessmom.com/newsletter
Listen to the Make Some Noise podcast
Get Andrea’s book, Make Some Noise: andreaowen.com/noise
Get the free Make Some Noise Workbook and bonuses andreaowen.com/msn
Andrea on Instagram
Andrea on Facebook
Andrea on Twitter
Andrea on YouTube
Andrea on Pinterest

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576: Summer Series Wrap Up: Your 3 Next Steps Aug 30, 2021

Show notes

How did we get here? 12 weeks ago we kicked off our Lead Like A Mother Summer Series. This was back in June when the world was full of hope and it looked like things could be really turning around in this pandemic.

12 weeks later, we are still here.

And so is the pandemic.

As we close out this series, I want to invite you to consider how the lessons of this series apply to you at any time, in any season.

No matter how hard the world becomes - or how GREAT it becomes, a few things remain true:

It is likely that YOU will continue to be the single most force that holds you back from getting what you want and need, so you must stay keenly connected to habits that don’t serve you
Your brain WILL revert to negative thought patterns and dysfunctional loops routinely, so you must constantly check what you’re letting in and how you’re framing your situation
Your innate ability to lead is a privilege and a responsibility not to be taken lightly.

In this episode, we will dive into these 3 truths so that you can continue to feel strong, powerful, and capable even when you don’t feel in control of what is happening around you.

We continue to be in this together, my friend. I GOT YOU.

Link mentioned:

Join for info on my Hope, Happiness & Mental Health Challenge

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575: Abby Medcalf: How to Reconceptionalize your Relationship with your Partner Aug 25, 2021

Show notes

Abby Medcalf is a Relationship Maven, psychologist, author, podcast host, and Tedx speaker who has helped thousands of people think differently so they can create connection, ease, and joy in their relationships (especially the one with yourself)! With her unique background in both business and counseling, she brings a fresh, effective perspective to life’s struggles using humor and her direct, no-nonsense style.

With over 30 years of experience, Abby is a recognized authority and sought-after speaker at organizations such as Google, Apple, AT&T, Kaiser, PG&E, American Airlines, and Chevron. She’s been a featured expert on CBS and ABC news, and has been a contributor to Huff Post, Women’s Health, and Bustle.

She’s the author of the #1 Amazon best-selling book, “Be Happily Married, Even if Your Partner Won’t Do a Thing,” and the host of the top-rated “Relationships Made Easy” Podcast. Her new book, "Negative Thinking Sucks (and Not in a Good Way) will be out soon!

Listen in to hear Abby share:

How her path as a recovering heroin addict living in Israel led her to her current work
Why competition, not communication, is crushing your relationships
What competition in relationships looks like
The concept of sharing, adding, and subtracting resources
A total reconceptualization of sharing “plates” with your partner in terms of each other’s duties and responsibilities
How to stop feeling like you’re always doing more than your partner
The exact way to have a conversation around household duties and division of labor
How to practice having faith in love and not fear
How confirmation bias erodes our relationships and how to see your relationships through a healthier lense
Acknowledging that we all want the same thing - to feel love, connected, and accepted

Links mentioned:

Get my free 15 Minute Manifest
Connect with Abby
Free Guide: The Complete Guide To Effective Communication In Every Relationship
Instagram: @abbymedcalfthriving
Facebook
LinkedIn
Twitter
YouTube Channel: Abby Medcalf Thriving

Thank you to our sponsor:

Talkspace: To match with your perfect therapist for a fraction of the price of traditional therapy, go to talkspace.com, Make sure to use the code SHAMELESS to get $100 off your first month and show your support for the show.

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574: 6 Steps to Turning Your Struggles into Stories of Strength Aug 23, 2021

Show notes

What if the struggles you shy away from sharing are actually the stories that give way to your superpowers?

When we go through hard things, we often want to move away from them, forget they happened, and continue on our merry way without owning the profound impact of hard circumstances. Of course, this makes a ton of sense. I mean, sitting in hard things is never fun.

But sometimes when we walk away without owning how our struggles have shaped us, we miss out on the huge opportunity to see how we are made so much stronger by what we have endured.

When you take some time to look closely and critically at your struggles, you can see where there might be loose ends in the final chapters of the story. You might even see where you have left a story unfinished - and let it continue to nag at you, or even plague you.

In this episode, we’ll look at the power you can find in looking closely at your struggles and their corresponding stories. We’ll talk through how you can rewrite the endings to these stories in order to own where you hold power. This will help you see how that power has you poised to move forward in your life in bold and brave ways.

Tune in to learn 6 steps you can take to reposition your struggles as stories that pushed you to grow & learn and shaped you into who you are today

Link mentioned:

Get my free 15 Minute Manifest

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573: JoAnn Crohn: Helping Your Kids Build Healthy Friendships Aug 18, 2021

Show notes

JoAnn Crohn, M. Ed is a parenting educator and former elementary teacher who helps moms feel confident in everything from raising empowered, self-sufficient kids to dropping the anxiety and guilt out of modern parenthood.

She’s an accomplished writer, author, podcast host of the No Guilt Mom podcast, and speaker, appearing in national media and founder of the parenting site, NoGuiltMom.com. Her specialty is talking to both parents and kids - with her self-paced digital courses for kids and parents in handling big emotions, creating a morning routine, and conquering the homework drama.

JoAnn created the most awesome book/workbook for kids, Me and My Friendships. After digging into the book myself, I knew I had to have her on the show to share with us how we can help our kids build healthy friendships.

Listen in to hear JoAnn share:

Her personal experience in friendship struggles as a kid that led her to writing a book about friendship for kids
The key characteristics of being a good friend that we can teach our kids from an early age
3 tips you can use to help your kids have better friendships
Why modeling listening, especially reflective listening, is so valuable to your kids
How to help kids with self regulation during hard emotional moments
What to do if your kids don't want to listen to your friendship advice
What to do if your kid comes home from school complaining about a friend
How to talk to your kids about being an upstander with friends
When you should intervene in friendships vs when you should let them figure it out on their own

Links mentioned:

Get my free 15 Minute Manifest
Connect with JoAnn and get her free workbook: No Guilt Mom
Podcast: No Guilt Mom
Book: Me and My Friendships by JoAnn Crohn
Social Media: @NoGuiltMom (Pinterest, Facebook, Instagram, YouTube)

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