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Health & Fitness

Sex and the Psyche

Sex and the Psyche is hosted by clinical sex therapists, Dr. Jenni Skyler and Daniel Lebowitz. Married with two children, Jenni and Daniel, take listeners behind the scenes on how they talk shop on a deeper level as they conceptualize the intersection of relationships, sex, and psychology. With over 16 years of helping couples and individuals enhance and optimize their sexual function, pleasure, and knowledge of human sexuality, Sex and the Psyche covers the issues that affect most everyone from desire discrepancy, erectile issues, painful sex, porn obsessions, premature and delayed ejaculation, and healing from affairs among many other topics.

As a husband-wife team and co-directors of ‘The Intimacy Institute for Sex and Relationship Therapy’, Jenni and Daniel share their expertise from real life scenarios, bringing a unique angle to understanding relationships while offering listeners helpful communication skills through thoughtful and intelligent conversations designed to help connect the more complicated dots for manifesting a more satisfying and sustainable sex life.

Links:

drjenniskyler.substack.com

The Intimacy Institute Roadmap to Intimacy online courses

Latest Episodes:

S4E26: Lasting Longer, Less Shame: Premature Ejaculation & the Science of Delay Spray with Jeff Abraham Jun 10, 2026

Show notes

Jeff Abraham didn't set out to build a sexual wellness company. He was a semiconductor engineer from a coal mining town in Pennsylvania who sold his business, retired, and got a call from his neighbor, Dr. Ronald Gilbert, the urologist who invented Promescent's delay spray. One conversation, one product sample, and one phone call later, Jeff was all in.

What followed was fifteen years of building one of the most respected sexual wellness brands in the world with over 5 million bottles sold, more than 4,000 healthcare professionals recommending the product, and a mission that Jeff describes simply as helping people. Along the way, he lost his closest friend to an act of senseless violence. And he decided the best thing he could do with that grief was give Dr. Gilbert the legacy he deserved.

In this episode, Dr. Jenni Skyler and Daniel Lebowitz sit down with Jeff for one of the most candid and practically useful conversations about male sexual functioning you'll find anywhere. They dig into the clinical reality of premature ejaculation, the difference between clinical PE and the much larger group of men who simply want better intimacy. Why 75% of women don't orgasm from intercourse alone, and what that means for couples. Why men who struggle with PE often stop initiating sex entirely, and the spiral that follows. How shame, not physiology, is usually the most dangerous factor in the room. And why Jeff's answer to "what's the best thing you can do for better intimacy?" is still, always, communication.

They also talk about the rise of male masturbatory devices, why younger men are increasingly choosing not to pursue partners at all, the engineering logic behind Promescent's patented eutectic formula, and how to "put one in the bank" before intercourse if anxiety is running the show.

This is a conversation for men who have quietly stepped back from intimacy because of shame and for the partners who don't understand why. Jeff is warm, irreverent, deeply informed, and completely unafraid to say the thing most people in this space are dancing around.

Learn more about Promescent

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S4E25: Zach and Sally Maxwell: The Relationship Framework Nobody Taught You Jun 03, 2026

Show notes

Dr. Jenni Skyler and Daniel Lebowitz sit down with Zach and Sally Maxwell, relationship thought leaders, executive coaches, and co-founders of The Art of Conscious Love, for a conversation that will change how you think about romance. Together since they were 18, the Maxwells have built a modern relationship framework around a radical premise: love is not something you fall into. It's something you practice. They walk through their eight-pillar approach to conscious relationships covering personal accountability, inner narratives, transparency, desire, conflict resolution, and the art of consciously designing your own monogamy. A masterclass in what it actually takes to make love last.

https://www.max-wellcoaching.com/

https://www.linkedin.com/in/sally-swallow-maxwell/

sally@max-wellcoaching.com

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

S4E24: Irwin and Sue Goldstein Part 2: Beyond Viagra-50 Years of Marriage, Menopause, and the Truth About Female Desire May 27, 2026

Show notes

If Part 1 was about the field of sexual medicine, Part 2 is about the marriage at the center of it. Dr. Jenni Skyler and Daniel Lebowitz return to their conversation with Dr. Irwin and Sue Goldstein, and this time, the questions get more personal. How do you stay married for fifty years? What does great sex actually look like across the decades? And what happens when a woman who has spent her career in sexual medicine starts experiencing low desire herself? Sue Goldstein opens up about her own journey through peri-menopause and the slow erosion of her libido- what she calls "duty sex", and the medications that brought not just her sex drive back, but a playfulness in her marriage she hadn't realized had gone missing. She walks listeners through her menopause toolbox of five treatments, explains why she's "76 and feels like she's in her 50s", and dismantles the lingering fears from the Women's Health Initiative that have kept generations of women in what she calls hormone prison. Dr. Irwin shares his own daily protocols for sexual health, why he believes most older men are leaving capacity on the table, and the surprising data from their own clinic- that more than half the Vyleesi prescriptions they write are off-label for men. They explore why dopamine is dopamine, regardless of gender. The reality of persistent genital arousal disorder. And a remarkable story of a teenage horseback rider whose chronic arousal turned out to be a herniated disc. This episode is full of practical wisdom, clinical innovation, and one of the most real conversations about long-term love you'll hear all year. The Goldsteins' secret to fifty years of marriage? Best friends, good sex, and the willingness to keep trying new things — including a chocolate sauce on the day before you change the sheets.

Irwin Goldstein, MD, IF (he/him/his). Director, San Diego Sexual Medicine 5555 Reservoir Drive, Suite 300, San Diego, CA 92120, Director, Sexual Medicine, UC San Diego Health East Campus, San Diego, CA. Clinical Professor of Urology, University of California at San Diego. Voluntary Clinical Professor of Obstetrics, Gynecology and Reproductive Services Past President, International Society for the Study of Women’s Sexual Health. Past President, Sexual Medicine Society of North America. Editor Emeritus, Sexual Medicine Reviews, The Journal of Sexual Medicine, International Journal of Impotence Research.

Phone: 619 265-8865 - Mobile: 619 987-7432. Email: dr.irwingoldstein@gmail.com. http://www.sandiegosexualmedicine.com. Like us on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/SDSexMed. X: http://twitter.com/SDSexualMed

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S4E23: Beyond Viagra: The Pioneers of Sexual Medicine with Dr. Irwin & Sue Goldstein - Part 1 May 20, 2026

Show notes

Dr. Irwin Goldstein didn't set out to become a pioneer of sexual medicine. He was a biomedical engineer turned urology resident who, as he tells it, asked one stupid question during a 1976 surgery: "Could you explain the physiology of erection to me?" The surgeon shrugged. Irwin spent the next decade figuring it out. Along the way, he co-discovered that nitric oxide, the elephant of our air, is what makes erections possible. He published the first paper on it in 1991. Seven years later, he became the first author on the New England Journal of Medicine paper that introduced Viagra to the world. But that's only half the story. The other half is Sue Goldstein, Irwin's college sweetheart turned partner in life, parenting, and eventually the practice itself. Sue spent decades raising their family while quietly absorbing the science her husband brought home. She is now an AASECT-certified educator, a published researcher, and one of the most outspoken patient advocates in the field. Together, they run San Diego Sexual Medicine, a clinic where every patient gets a three-hour visit, full education, and an entire team practicing what they call true bio-psycho social care. In this first half of our two-part conversation, Dr. Jenni Skyler and Daniel Lebowitz sit with the Goldsteins and explore how a field gets built, and how it still leaves so many patients behind. They cover prostate cancer and the silent erectile crisis that follows it. The buccal grafting innovation that's helping women with severe vestibular pain finally get answers. Why women, on average, see ten or twelve doctors before they get a real diagnosis. And Sue's pet peeve, medical gaslighting and what to do when a doctor says "there's nothing that can be done." This is a conversation for anyone who has ever felt unheard by a clinician, dismissed by their own body, or convinced they were the problem. The Goldsteins want you to know — you're not. You just haven't been to the right office yet.

Irwin Goldstein, MD, IF (he/him/his)
Director, San Diego Sexual Medicine
5555 Reservoir Drive, Suite 300, San Diego, CA 92120
Director, Sexual Medicine, UC San Diego Health East Campus, San Diego, CA
Clinical Professor of Urology, University of California at San Diego
Voluntary Clinical Professor of Obstetrics, Gynecology and Reproductive Services
Past President, International Society for the Study of Women’s Sexual Health
Past President, Sexual Medicine Society of North America
Editor Emeritus, Sexual Medicine Reviews, The Journal of Sexual Medicine, International Journal of Impotence Research
phone: 619 265-8865
fax: 619 265-7696
mobile: 619 987-7432
dr.irwingoldstein@gmail.com
http://www.sandiegosexualmedicine.com
Like us on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/SDSexMed
twitter.com/SDSexualMed

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

S4E22: Susan Bratton on Expanded Orgasm, Radical Honesty, and 34 Years of Hot Sex May 13, 2026

Show notes

When Susan Bratton talks about intimacy, she doesn't speak in theory. She speaks from 34 years of marriage. From decades of teaching couples how to stay erotically connected through every life stage. From writing 44 books and programs on passionate lovemaking and from her own personal journey. Eleven years into her marriage, she had never had an orgasm from intercourse and was avoiding sex with her husband entirely. Then she learned. And everything changed.

In this episode, Dr. Jenni Skyler and Daniel Lebowitz sit down with Susan for a wide-ranging conversation about what really keeps long-term love erotically alive. They talk about the expanded orgasm practice she learned from her mentor Dr. Patti Taylor — and how it transformed Susan from someone who couldn't orgasm during intercourse into someone who describes herself as an "orgasmic optimizer." They explore why Susan rejects the word "anorgasmia" entirely, replacing it with a single word: yet. They dig into the truth about female arousal that most couples never learn — that women's erectile tissue takes 20 to 30 minutes to fully engorge, and that the cultural script of "get hard, penetrate, finish" is, in Susan's words, "a religiously repressed patriarchal female oppression strategy that is no longer working." They talk about scheduled intimate dates (Susan and her husband have them two to six times a week), radical honesty as the foundation of a 34-year marriage, and why turn-on isn't just about sex — it's a life force that spills into everything. Susan also shares her ten intimacy principles — including the one she calls the most important of them all: practicing radical honesty. If you've ever wondered whether long-term love and erotic aliveness can coexist — Susan is the proof, and this episode is the playbook.

Susan is a champion and advocate for all those who desire ageless intimacy. She is a best-selling author and publisher of 44 books and programs including Sexual Soulmates, Relationship Magic, Revive Her Drive, The Steamy Sex Ed® Video Collection, Ravish Him, Dirty Talk, The Pumping Guide and Thrust In Time. She’s the official company spokesperson for GAINSWave® and The
Dr. Joel Kaplan Company. She serves as Chief Advocacy Officer of ProDxHealth.org STI testing.

Susan has been a featured guest on over 1,000 podcasts and TV shows, including:

Diary of a CEO, You Are Not Broken, Sex with Emily, The Human Upgrade with Dave Asprey, Good
Moms Bad Choices, Heal
Thyself, IDIOT with Laura Clery, The Infamous “Clit Camp” Music Video, LuvBites with Dr. Tara, and The Chalene Show.

Her books and interviews have helped millions take control of their sexual joy. Her message resonates across gender and age because it’s rooted in agency, body literacy, and connection.

Susan Bratton | "Intimacy Expert to Millions ”
CEO, Better Lover · Personal Life Media · The20

Susan has spent over two decades doing something censorship and shame have long tried to silence: teaching people the pleasure-based sex education they never received.

She is the world's most prolific sex educator and author of 44 books and programs.

Her newsletters, Better Lover, Personal Life Media, The20, and Longevity Wins, reach 300,000 readers, and her precision sexual vitality supplements are formulated on the science of blood flow and desire.

SusanBratton.com

BetterLover.com

Personal Life Media, Inc.
The20, LLC.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

S4E21: The Affair Isn't the End - Part 2: Sex After Betrayal May 06, 2026

Show notes

In this episode, Jenni and Daniel talk with infidelity expert Michelle Weiner-Davisabout how couples can rebuild sex, safety, and emotional connection after an affair. They normalize everything from “hot and heavy” post-discovery sex to long dry spells, and offer practical tools for easing back into touch, managing triggers, and shifting from obligation to genuine desire. Michelle also explains why she believes choice—not a “bad marriage”—causes infidelity, and how he two-day intensives help couples move from crisis to traction.

Bullet Points:

It’s common for betrayed partners to feel increased sexual desire for the unfaithful spouse right after discovery—this can be a form of reclaiming and reconnection, not something to be ashamed of.
After an initial “hot and heavy” phase, sex often cools down, which can trigger panic that the couple is sliding back into old patterns.
Rebuilding intimacy works best when couples start with low‑ pressure touch (like hugs that are explicitly not a prelude to sex) instead of jumping straight to intercourse.
Many women experience sex as obligation—understanding responsive desire and their own pleasure can shift sex from duty to something they actively want.
Michelle argues that “bad marriages don’t cause infidelity; deciding to cheat does”, and she uses two‑ day therapy intensives to give couples enough time to stabilize, process, and begin real repair.

Links:

Michele@divorcebusting.com
2-day intensive Information
Audiobook: Healing from Infidelity
Website: DivorceBusting.com

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

S4E20: The Affair Isn't the End - Part 1: Why Most Marriages Can Be Saved May 06, 2026

Show notes

In this episode, Dr. Jenni and Daniel sit down with Michele Weiner-Davis — internationally renowned marriage therapist, bestselling author, and creator of the Divorce Busting method — for a conversation about what most therapists won't tell you: that many marriages assumed to be over are actually salvageable, and that infidelity, while devastating, is rarely the real ending.
Michele shares the personal story behind her solution-focused approach, including how her own mother's divorce shaped her commitment to helping couples find another way. Michele, Jenni, and Daniel dig into the questions betrayed partners feel compelled to ask — and which ones quietly keep the pain alive longer than it needs to. They explore the unfaithful partner's essential role in repair, why "just communicate" isn't enough, and what real healing actually requires from both people in the room.
This is a conversation for anyone who has wondered if their relationship can come back from something hard — and for anyone who has been told it can’t.

Links:

Michele@divorcebusting.com
2-day intensive Information
Audiobook: Healing from Infidelity
Website: DivorceBusting.com

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

S3BonusEpisode: Masturbation–Nasty, Nice, or Nourishing? Featuring Sex Educator & Author Paul Joannides Feb 26, 2026

Show notes

In this never released short Bonus Episode from The Modern Pleasure Podcast with Dr. Jenni Skyler and Kim Kaplan, Paul Joannides discusses cultural issues surrounding women's sexuality, including the restriction of abortion and birth control, and emphasizes the importance of sex education. Paul shares a story from a college newspaper about young women's negative views on masturbation. Dr. Skyler adds that these attitudes often stem from religious or cultural upbringing, and the conversation touches on the broader societal messaging around pleasure and sexuality.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

S3E19: Lost Episode: The Guide to Getting it On-An Interview with Author Paul Joannides Feb 19, 2026

Show notes

Paul Joannides is an author and sex therapist who discusses the impact of his book on reducing anxiety and shame around sex. In this never before published episode from the Modern Pleasure Podcast which Kim Kaplan and Dr. Jenni Skyler co-hosted together, they discuss the challenges parents face in educating their children about sex and the importance of starting these conversations early. They also explore the role of religion and societal norms in shaping sexual attitudes. Dr. Paul emphasizes the need for better sex education, particularly for men, and the importance of understanding the differences between male and female sexuality.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

S3Bonus Episode: Natalie And Dr. Jenni Role-Play a Mini Psychedelic Therapy Feb 12, 2026

Show notes

In this bonus episode, Kim Kaplan, Dr. Jenni Skyler, and Natalie discuss the therapeutic use of psychedelics, particularly MDMA, for healing sexual trauma. They emphasize that different psychedelics are suited to different traumas and that set and setting are crucial. Natalie highlights the importance of a knowledgeable guide and the process of preparation, including obtaining informed consent. They role-play a preparation session, illustrating the need to address ambivalence and fear. Dr. Skyler experiences anxiety and fear, which Natalie validates and respects. The conversation underscores the necessity of creating a safe therapeutic environment where clients can express their true feelings and needs, empowering them in their healing journey.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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