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    Kids & Family

    Securely Attached

    Securely Attached is your go-to parenting podcast, supporting moms and dads from pregnancy all the way through their child’s adolescence and every stage in between.

    Join us every Tuesday as clinical psychologist and mom of two Dr. Sarah Bren shares her expertise and interviews top experts in the field, simplifying complicated concepts and pulling back the curtain on the brain science and psychology that drives and shapes the parent-child relationship.

    And now, every Thursday, Dr. Sarah Bren is joined by Dr. Emily Upshur and Dr. Rebecca Hershberg for a special segment, Beyond The Sessions. We’re answering YOUR parenting questions from the perspective of clinical psychologists highly trained in developmental science and real-life moms who get that parenting is messy, and sometimes we have to laugh, cry, and throw out the “rules.”

    From toddler tantrums, to effective discipline strategies, to leaning into the principles of respectful parenting, and to managing your own mental wellness as a parent—this podcast is your ultimate resource for judgment-free, research-backed information you know you can trust.

    About Sarah Bren, PhD
    Dr. Sarah Bren is a licensed clinical psychologist and mom of two who helps parents understand the building blocks of child development and how secure relationships form and thrive. Her work is focused on helping parents find their inner confidence so they can respond to any parenting problem that comes along and raise kids who are healthy, resilient, and kind.

    Advertise

    Copyright: © 2023

    • Apple Podcasts
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    • Spotify

    Latest Episodes:
    Confronting death to find a deeper meaning in life: A continuation of my conversation with Rabbi Steve Leder Apr 16, 2024
    Show notes

    This week my conversation about finding the beauty in life and learning to accept the inevitability of death with Rabbi Steve Leder continues.

    Along with being the Rabbi at Wilshire Boulevard Temple in Los Angeles Rabbi Steve Leder is the author of five books, including The Beauty of What Remains and his newest book, For You When I Am Gone.

    We're discussing how to answer your kid's questions about the afterlife, the best and worst things to say to someone who is grieving, how to model for our kids the power of showing up in the face of loss, and how to accept and embrace the non-linear process of grieving.

    This two-part episode will offer you tangible tools for infusing your daily life with even more meaning, purpose, and a profound sense of connection.


    Q&A: Is it okay for screen time "rules" to go out the window on travel days? Apr 11, 2024
    Show notes

    Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...

    2:46 - Travel days can be free-for-alls when it comes to kids and screens - and that's okay.

    7:10 - Incorporating a "brain break," a "snack break," and a "reading break" into your travel routine.

    10:29 - Context switching can be difficult for children and is often something we need to help them build skills for, rather than expecting them to just be able to do it on their own.

    12:08 - Dr. Rebecca shared some reflections of her own vulnerable parenting moments in real-time - sharing how even this conversation was kicking up feelings of shame and defensiveness, and how she worked through them.

    16:14 - How to be kinder to ourselves and make mindset shifts when things don't go quite as planned.

    20:58 - Modeling appropriate screen use can be one of the most effective forms of teaching (but we don't have to do it perfectly all the time to still have an impact!)

    ✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨


    Death, grief, and parenting: How we can help our kids make sense of and make peace with death with Rabbi Steve Leder Apr 09, 2024
    Show notes

    Having to explain and help our kids process and grasp the concept of death, whether in a moment where it affects them personally, or simply as a concept as a whole, can be a particularly challenging conversation for parents to navigate.

    Joining me is Rabbi Steve Leder. Along with being the Rabbi at Wilshire Boulevard Temple in Los Angeles, he is the author of five books, including The Beauty of What Remains and his newest book, For You When I Am Gone.

    Whether you're seeking guidance on how to discuss life and death with your children or trying to come to terms with your own mortality, my hope is you walk away from this episode feeling a deeper understanding of how the very presence of death can make for more beauty in life.


    Q&A: What are the do's and don't for introducing screens to my toddler? Apr 04, 2024
    Show notes

    Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...

    4:00 - Using screens when YOU need a break is absolutely okay and you shouldn't feel any shame or guilt around doing this!

    5:05 - The difference between television and a tablet in regard to your child's development.

    8:40 - How to separate your own anxiety and fear mongering around screen time so you can be educated and intentional about your child's use of technology.

    9:30 - The cost/benefit of giving your child a tablet versus you keeping them off of a screen and then feeling so burnt out that you lose your cool and yell at your child.

    13:03 - Ask yourself, "are screens decreasing your stress or adding more to it?"

    16:38 - What the research reveals about how screens impact executive function development and the development of attention span.

    18:55 - The difference between independent screen time versus interacting with screens together with your child.

    Additional podcast episodes for how you can build your child's ability to engage in independent play:

    1. Fostering independent play and a love of learning with Lizzie Assa

    2. The Wonders of play with Jennie Monness

    3. How play could be the key to mental health and well-being with Mike Rucker

    ✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨


    The power of stories in parenthood: Representation, identity, social media, and the "rules" of parenthood with L'Oreal Thompson Payton Apr 02, 2024
    Show notes

    Delve into the transformative power of storytelling across the spectrum of parenthood, identity, and navigating life's challenges.

    Joining me is award-winning journalist, speaker, and the author of Stop Waiting for Perfect: Step Out of Your Comfort Zone and Into Your Power, L'Oreal Thompson Payton.

    L'Oreal sheds light on the often-overlooked struggles faced by black women navigating infertility, and the importance of representation in storytelling. From grappling with postpartum depression and anxiety to challenging societal norms surrounding motherhood, L'Oreal offers valuable insights into embracing imperfection and finding strength in authenticity.

    INTERESTED IN LEARNING MORE ABOUT THE FIRST YEAR OF PARENTHOOD?

    Click HERE to sign up for my FREE workshop, Confident Parenting from the Start, to get tools and strategies that you can put into practice right away to challenge self-doubt, put an end to your panic-Googling, and finally find the ease and enjoyment in early parenthood!

    WANT TO TAKE YOUR LEARNING EVEN FURTHER?

    Join me in The Authentic Parent, my comprehensive self-paced course that takes my workshop to the next level and teaches you everything you need to know (that no one tells you ahead of time) for how to confidently move through your first year of parenthood.


    Q&A: How to tell your child you have cancer Mar 28, 2024
    Show notes

    Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...

    5:34 - Where do you even begin? How to start this difficult conversation with your child.

    6:15 - The 3 pillars to keep in mind that will help you to guide your child through this conversation and process their emotions.

    10:18 - The importance of honesty and knowing what information to share with your child in a developmentally appropriate manner.

    15:33 - It is helpful to remind yourself that the goal of this conversation is about helping your child make sense of everything and feel less alone, not reassure them that everything is "great."

    19:30 - Try not to put so much pressure on this one conversation. Try to view this as a jumping off point that can be revisited whenever necessary.

    If you would like support processing your cancer diagnosis and helping your child work through their feelings about this, you can always reach out to Upshur Bren Psychology Group to learn about our virtual coaching and therapeutic services.

    ✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨


    Finding positives in spite of our pain: A mother's journey navigating her child's illness with Dr. Maggie Kang Mar 26, 2024
    Show notes

    No one prepares you for hearing that your child is sick. Navigating a child's harrowing medical diagnosis is often one of the hardest things a parent can go through. Today, we talk with a mother who has walked this path, and how she found a way to redefine her narrative in order to diminish her pain and suffering in one of her life's most challenging moments.

    Joining me today is board-certified radiologist and Certified Life Coach Dr. Maggie Kang. Dr. Kang was faced with the unthinkable when her 9-year old healthy daughter was suddenly diagnosed with a rare disease, and life as she knew it took an unexpected turn. Through the pain and uncertainty, she navigated the challenging terrain of her daughter's illness, transforming the traumatic experience into a catalyst for personal growth and healing.

    Don't miss this touching and insightful interview to hear Dr. Kang open up about where she was able to find her strength and resilience, her realization of the impact her own mental health had on her daughter, and the transformative shift when she choose to focus on the positives.

    LISTEN TO DR. KANG'S TEDX TALK:

    The Truth About Pain and Suffering Will Change Your Life

    GET DR. KANG'S DAUGHTER'S BOOK:

    My Hospital Stay by Nell Choi

    ADDITIONAL PARENTING RESOURCES:

    Click HERE to download my free guide that will help you to understand the building blocks of resilience - with actual phrases you can swap out to help your child to tolerate distress, develop a growth mindset, increase self esteem, and be more resilient!


    Q&A: How can I parent my daughter so she doesn't become a people pleaser? Mar 21, 2024
    Show notes

    Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...

    1:25 - Some of the most common traits and characteristics of a people pleaser.

    5:00 - How the role of gender plays a part in people pleasing.

    7:44 - Subtle language shifts parents can make to promote your child's ability to tune into themselves and their needs.

    10:28 - Helping bridge and stretch your child's understanding of themselves and their needs without discounting their feelings.

    14:20 - To help your child not become a people pleaser, it's helpful to teach them to tune into their internal compass so they know exactly what and how to please themselves.

    16:25 - The more secure our attachment systems, the less likely we are to be chronically avoiding our own needs in the service of others.

    21:34 - As millennial women, many of us have been conditioned to be people pleasers, so doing work on ourselves and modeling this to our children can have a major impact.

    ✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨


    Using presence as the antidote to trauma: How we begin to break cycles with Dr. Jacob Ham Mar 19, 2024
    Show notes

    An exploration of healing trauma through presence, connection, and self-awareness.

    Joining me to take us on this journey of discovery is licensed clinical psychologist Dr. Jacob Ham. Dr. Ham will offer listeners a deeper understanding of trauma's impact on a person's neurobiology and their interpretation of the world around them, while emphasizing the importance of our relationships as a means of healing. All parents will benefit from the wisdom he shares on reflective functioning and how we can use this to break cycles of intergenerational trauma and insecure attachment patterns with our own children.

    By the end of this conversation, my hope is that you won't just have new information, but will feel a renewed appreciation for the power of presence and feel enlightened, inspired, and perhaps a bit changed!

    JOIN DR. JACOB HAM'S NEWSLETTER:

    https://drjacobham.com/

    WANT ADDITIONAL PARENTING SUPPORT:

    Click HERE to download my free guide that will teach you the 4 pillars of secure attachment that will allow you to focus on parenting with attunement and trust.


    Q&A: How can I handle jealousy and sibling rivalry? Mar 14, 2024
    Show notes

    Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...

    3:27 - How to use radical acceptance rather than trying to make everything "fair" or "equal" between siblings.

    6:28 - Forging an individual relationship with each of your children and offering them one-on-one time separate from their siblings can be helpful.

    9:43 - We tend to focus on the difficult moments (like when our kids are fighting) and often forget to log the good moments (like when they are getting along or even just peacefully coexisting).

    13:05 - We can set conditions to maximize the likelihood that siblings will get along, but at the end of the day we can't ensure our kids will always have a strong relationship.

    21:20 - Narrating what is happening versus focusing on your child's behaviors and telling them "they're being mean" or to "stop fighting" can be an easy, yet impactful shift.

    ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES ABOUT SIBLING FIGHTING:

    - Navigating Sibling Fights

    - How Can We Implement Consequences That Teach, Not Just Punish Our Kids

    - Fostering Deep and Meaningful Relationships

    ✨We want to hear from you! Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions! ✨


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