Room 4 Four

Latest Episodes:

Notes To a Younger Self Nov 04, 2024

Get ready for some hilarious (and cringe-worthy) life advice we’d tell our younger selves if we had a time machine and a whole lot of nerve. Caitlin, Charlotte, Kallie, and Megan take you on a journey through the good, the bad, and the “what were we even thinking?” moments of life. From questionable college decisions to the messy magic of motherhood, these regular (and slightly rogue) moms are laying it all out with zero shame.

This week’s chit-chat includes a post-Halloween debrief with stories of epic family costumes, candy overloads, and the unholy number of trick-or-treaters in Kallie’s neighborhood. The crew also tackles listener questions, reminisces about dating flops, and hands out unfiltered advice to anyone still figuring out how to “adult.” Spoiler: it involves embracing your inner chaos.

And in “Pits and Peaks,” each host reveals their recent highs and lows of the week, from soccer number heartbreak to finally sneaking in some glorious alone time.

TIMESTAMPS:

00:00 YALE AD

00:14 WELCOME BACK

00:48 INTRO

01:05 CATCH UP

06:37 AUDIENCE QUESTIONS

10:34 AD BREAK 1

11:20 MAIN TOPIC: NOTES TO YOUR YOUNGER SELF

35:38 AD BREAK 2

36:09 PITS AND PEAKS

42:16 YALE AD

42:29 OUTRO

Finding Your Village Oct 21, 2024

In this episode, join us as these regular moms start off with exchanging anecdotes about house guests. Whether you have the room or you don’t, having friends and family over is something these moms appreciate, if not for just the company but what they bring to the table. Since they became moms, they talk about the transition of gratitude they have towards their parents or in-laws; for all the help they offer with their children when they’re in town. Caitlin and the others joke about how they like to start off the visit with a very clean house, but it doesn’t stay that way for long.

As you grow your family, you also need to grow your village. Kallie points out that decades ago, it was common for the whole town to have a part in raising your children. Now, it is a lot harder to find that nurturing environment your child needs.

This discussion takes the ladies back in time introspectively of their first experiences feeling out of their depth while babysitting and how times have changed. Charlotte mentions how much of a privilege it is to be financially comfortable enough to hire an extra set of hands, but others aren’t as fortunate.

What does your village look like to you? It’s different for everyone. Megan appreciates the emotional side of support from her friends and family, wanting a positive, loving environment for her children. The moms agree that having reliability is also a key element in creating their village as well as trust.

00:00 YALE AD

00:14 WELCOME BACK

00:40 INTRO

00:57 CATCH UP

07:57 AUDIENCE QUESTIONS

16:06 AD BREAK 1

17:34 MAIN TOPIC: HIRING HELP

43:18 AD BREAK 2

43:48 PITS AND PEAKS

48:28 YALE AD

48:41 OUTRO

Where to Draw the Line: Kids and the Internet Oct 07, 2024

In this episode, join the ladies as they jump into all things fall. They reminisce about past halloween costumes over the years and touch base on family traditions, new and old. Apple picking and pumpkin picking around CT is a staple in each of their households.

More lightly, they discuss the struggles of grocery shopping with children while having to return the cart in the grocery store - do you always return yours? Has a stranger seen you struggling with your kids and offered to return the cart for you? Pay it forward like Caitlin says!

A popular debate is where do we draw the line between the internet and our children? Kallie talks about some great advice she has received, that you can share motherhood online without sharing your children. These moms discuss how they wrestle with over sharing or under sharing and finding that happy medium but do make note that once it’s out there, is it possible to really erase it? They all try to remain open and ask their children what they feel comfortable with.

To conclude, as always they end with some pits and peaks of the week: Unique homemade treats to bring to the movies, extra contractor work and new experiences.

00:00 YALE AD

00:14 WELCOME BACK

00:35 INTRO

00:52 WELCOME/AUDIENCE QUESTIONS

14:29 AD BREAK 1

16:04 MAIN TOPIC: KIDS USING INTERNET

36:09 AD BREAK 2

36:40 PITS AND PEAKS

43:09 OUTRO

Protecting Your Kids, What to Believe? Sep 17, 2024

In this episode, talk about the change of season with Megan, Kallie, Charlotte and Caitlin. They start their discussion with what they do to get ready for the holidays and how they prepare for this busy, busy season.

As moms, what’s your ideal thing to do if you (finally) have some free time? It can be different for anyone. These four moms all enjoy an array of different things from vacations, self care, going out with friends or even just being productive and catching up on chores around the house.

With this new age of social media, and the answer to any of our questions at the touch of our fingers, fear mongering has become a huge issue troubling parents. Whether it’s exaggerated headlines, warning labels, ads, or even wildlife, the media seems to play a vital key for parents increasing anxiety about these many possible impending dangers, even if they are not totally logical. Knowledge has never been so accessible but it is getting harder and harder to distinguish what is true and what is false. Charlotte stresses the importance of being aware of social media algorithms and how they can be helpful but also harmful to us.

To conclude, the ladies talk about something light - mocktails. A fun tip is that you can actually add ingredients to your mocktails that offer health benefits!

00:00 YALE AD

00:14 WELCOME BACK

00:58 AUDIENCE QUESTIONS

11:21 AD BREAK 1

12:56 MAIN TOPIC: FEARMONGERING

33:11 AD BREAK 2

33:41 YALE SEGMENT: MOCKTAILS

38:02 PITS AND PEAKS

Back to School Talks: Tackling New Styles and Body Dysmorphia Sep 02, 2024

In this episode, we dive into the different emotions and experiences with the start of the new school year, as mothers, past teachers and youth. Listen as they discuss the start of the start of the school year and all that comes along with it.

Caitlin starts off comparing the first day of school to the feeling of New Year’s Day. The ladies compare and contrast how their feelings towards the first day of school have changed as they take on new roles in life. On one hand, they look forward to more structure that comes with school and on the other hand as their children grow older, back to school shopping can become more complicated, especially if you have five children like Charlotte!

As Caitlin kids grow older, Caitlin self reflects on her first memories of feeling body dysmorphia when back to school shopping in 8th grade. This is when she first became self aware of the way she looked and what she wore. She also discusses the different disorders associated with it. Kallie, Megan, Caitlin and Charlotte continue the episode discussing how media like magazines and movies played a huge role in what they wore and how they viewed themselves growing up and now. They end the discussion with their experiences with child birth (plans) and back to school stories.

00:14 WELCOME BACK

00:50 WELCOME BACK (CONT.)

04:48 AUDIENCE QUESTIONS

10:53 1ST AD BREAK

12:29 KIDS BACK TO SCHOOL CLOTHES

34:22 2ND AD BREAK

34:37 YNHH BIRTH PLAN SEGMENT

39:00 PITS AND PEAKS

The Emotional Struggle of Decluttering Kids' Stuff Aug 19, 2024

In this episode, we tackle the emotional and practical aspects of decluttering kids' belongings, a topic requested by our audience. We delve into the emotional struggles of parting with items that hold sentimental value, from baby clothes to children's artwork, and the guilt associated with throwing away their creations.

We explore the emotional challenges parents face, such as feeling sentimental about baby items, dealing with children's reactions to toy donations, and managing the overwhelming volume of artwork. The conversation highlights different perspectives: from Caitlin's sentimentality and struggles with letting go, to Kallie's practical approach influenced by the book The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning, Charlotte's mixed feelings about keeping versus discarding, and Megan's difficulty parting with items tied to cherished memories.

In the second part, we share practical tips for managing and letting go of kids' belongings. Strategies include creating memory boxes and important boxes for keepsakes, being selective about what to store, and donating items instead of hoarding them.

00:14 WELCOME BACK

05:02 AUDIENCE QUESTIONS

17:48 GETTING RID OF KID’S STUFF

42:22 SUMMER SAFETY

46:24 GOLDFISH SWIM SCHOOL

56:53 PITS AND PEAKS

Are there Benefits of Social Media in Parenting? Aug 05, 2024

In this episode, we explore the often-overlooked positive aspects of social media in parenting. Despite the well-known negatives, we focus on the pros and personal gains we've experienced.

We discuss how social media can be a quick and interactive resource for tricky parenting issues, offering practical advice and reassurance. It provides a sense of community, helping parents feel less alone in their challenges. The discussion highlights the importance of curating a selective feed to avoid the comparison game while still benefiting from the wealth of knowledge available online.

Additionally, we touch on how social media can help parents connect with others facing similar challenges, provide educational content, and offer product recommendations. It also serves as a source of inspiration for parental self-care, ultimately enhancing overall well-being and parenting effectiveness.

At the end we share tips for a smooth back-to-school transition, including starting routines early to adjust to summer schedules and managing the added stress of significant life changes during this time. Tune in for a balanced view on how social media can positively impact parenting and practical back-to-school advice!

● 00:14 WELCOME BACK ● 06:56 SOCIAL MEDIA ● 24:34 AUDIENCE QUESTIONS ● 31:42 BACK 2 SCHOOL ● 37:45 PITS AND PEAKS

Beyond the Buzzword: Addressing True Bullying with Our Kids Jul 15, 2024

In this episode, we delve into the complex and sensitive issue of bullying, exploring its definition, the power of the word, its overuse and misuse, and the challenges parents face in handling it with their children.

Our discussion starts with defining bullying as unwanted, aggressive behavior among school-aged children that involves a real or perceived power imbalance, and is repeated or has the potential to be repeated over time.

Caitlin highlights how the topic is often considered taboo, making it difficult to bring up casually. She shares a personal story about her daughter Annabelle being bullied in kindergarten and the initial lack of response from the teacher. Caitlin raises important questions for new parents about how to handle bullying, who to call, and what to teach their children. We also ponder whether movies dramatize bullying and share our own childhood experiences of being picked on.

Other key points include concerns about navigating bullying, particularly when parents are not present at school to witness incidents firsthand. There is also the challenge of distinguishing between a mean comment and targeted bullying.

Join us for an honest and insightful conversation as we tackle the realities of bullying, the importance of proper identification, and the best ways to support our children through these difficult situations.

00:14 WELCOME BACK

00:52 QUESTIONS

14:31 TOPIC

34:36 HEALTH SEGMENT - COLONOSCOPY

39:25 PITS AND PEAKS

This episode is sponsored by Yale New Haven Health, offering a truly comprehensive approach to healthcare aimed at meeting the needs of local families. Yale New Haven Health provides access to community-based physicians as well as some of the nation's top pediatric and adult specialists, ready to treat everything from the flu to complex medical conditions. When you or your family faces any sort of health issue, knowing you have access to the best care is paramount. Learn more at ynhhs.org.

How to Tackle Tough Topics with Kids (Death, current events, etc.) Jul 01, 2024

Welcome to another episode of Room 4 Four, where four moms come together to talk about everything you’d chat about at a coffee date with your best mom friend.. In this episode, we dive into how to tackle tough topics with kids. Whether it's discussing death, current events, or other difficult subjects, we explore the ways we approach these conversations with our children.

Our discussion highlights the importance of finding a balance between honesty and protection. Kallie, who has young, curious children, believes in selective truth, sharing information without sugarcoating but leaving out details she feels her kids aren’t ready for. Caitlin also emphasizes limiting details, aiming to prevent her kids from becoming overly anxious while ensuring they are not entirely shielded from reality.

Charlotte uses books and open conversations to engage her children, asking them directly about their feelings and sharing her own emotions aloud. Megan focuses on communication, starting by asking her kids questions and then providing explanations tailored to their responses. Together, we share our experiences and strategies for navigating these tough yet meaningful conversations with our little ones, offering practical advice and heartfelt insights.

● 00:30 INTRO

● 00:47 AUDIENCE QUESTIONS

● 17:47 TOPIC OF THE DAY

● 39:31 WATER INTAKE

● 44:56 PITS AND PEAKS

What's for Dinner? The Mental Load of Nightly Family Meals Jun 17, 2024

In this episode of Room 4 Four, we tackle the often-overlooked mental burden of cooking dinner EVERY.SINGLE.NIGHT for your family. We each sure our personal struggles and the daily challenge of feeding their families.

Kallie reflects on the overwhelming task of meal preparation during early motherhood. She emphasizes the never-ending responsibility of providing healthy meals and snacks for her children. Caitlin shares her love-hate relationship with meal planning, the frustration of wasted ingredients, and the pressure of catering to changing tastes and preferences.

Charlotte discusses her transition to a more manageable meal routine as her kids grew older and the persistent expectation that she will handle dinner for the family. Megan opens up about her lack of enjoyment in cooking due to the demands of shuttling her kids to activities and her reliance on simple, quick meals to get through the week. The hosts share their tips and tricks for making meal times easier.

EXTRAS: If your morning routine had a theme song, least favorite part of the morning routine, planning big surprise parties.

Join us as we explore the complexities of meal preparation, the impact on our mental load, and practical solutions to ease the burden in this candid and relatable episode.

● 00:13 WELCOME BACK

● 01:58 CATCH UP

● 08:17 AUDIENCE QUESTIONS

● 24:15 MENTAL BURDEN W/ DINNER

● 48:56 MENOPAUSE

● 53:44 PITS AND PEAKS

Overbooked: Navigating Extracurriculars and the Pressure to Do It All Jun 03, 2024

In this episode, we dive into the world of extracurricular activities, after-school programs, summer camps, and sports teams, and the impact they have on our families. From the pressure to over-schedule to the challenge of balancing family time, we share our personal experiences and insights.

Kallie discusses her family's approach of limiting activities to preserve sacred family time and the importance of unstructured play for young kids. Charlotte shares her perspective on minimal extracurriculars due to the overwhelming costs and logistics. Megan opens up about her journey with her children's extensive involvement in activities like dance and soccer, and the struggle to keep them happy and off electronics. Caitlin reflects on her selective approach to group activities and the difficulty of finding the right balance.

We also explore the pressures parents face in managing their children's packed schedules, the financial burden, and the struggle to maintain family dinners and free time. Plus, we share our favorite gas station snacks and tips for navigating safe sleep when toddlers want to get out of bed.

00:42 WELCOME BACK

08:44 AUDIENCE QUESTIONS

19:28 OVER SCHEDULING

40:08 PRESSURES WITH KID’S ACTIVITIES

51:25 SAFE SLEEP

55:56 PITS AND PEAKS

59:26 CLOSING

This episode is supported by Sitter Connect. Sitter Connect offers a personalized service dedicated to connecting Connecticut families with highly recommended and qualified nannies and sitters. Their mission is to provide individualized and reliable care, ensuring the perfect match between a family’s needs and a caregiver’s qualifications. Whether it's for occasional, weekly, or last-minute needs, Sitter Connect strives to become an extension of your family, offering a personal touch service tailored to your unique requirements. Learn more at sitter-connect.com.

Changing Your Mindset About Growing Older May 20, 2024

In this episode, Kallie, Caitlin, Charlotte, and Megan share a conversation about their personal experiences with aging and motherhood. They chat about some of the experiences they’ve had in “feeling” older. Some of the topics include physical aging and how your body feels different and adjusting to that, creaky knees, chin hairs, and recovering from a night out.

They discuss how your pre-kid life is in the past, being nostalgic about these fun experiences we had in our 20’s, and mourning that even though there are still a lot of great seasons of life ahead of us. They talk about what it is like when you know you’re done having kids and that part of your life is over and how that coincides with a lot of changes physically to our body. They mention the shift when you go from a season of life with small kids when that’s a very huge part of your identity and how that shift occurs once your kids become more independent from you.

They also talk about turning milestone ages like 40 and 50 and how those feel. They address the anxieties that come with aging, like noticing new physical changes and worrying about the future. This episode offers a heartfelt but funny and relatable discussion on navigating the complexities of aging, health, and motherhood.

00:40 WELCOME BACK

09:50 AUDIENCE QUESTIONS

16:49 TOPIC: AGING

30:02 HEALTH SEGMENT - SUNSCREEN

34:20 PITS AND PEAKS

45:40 CLOSING REMARKS

What We DON’T Like About Being a Mom May 04, 2024

In honor of Mother’s Day, today the hosts are taking a bit of turn and chatting about some of the things we don’t like about motherhood. We delve into the challenging aspects of motherhood that are sometimes not discussed openly due to fear of judgment or mom-shaming. The hosts share their personal experiences with the emotional and physical demands of motherhood, highlighting the duality of joy and struggle that defines their everyday lives.

The conversation turns to the common issue of mother’s neglecting their own health and well-being as they prioritize their families' needs over their own. Women feel obligated to be caretakers, which means we put others’ needs before our own. As moms it can feel awkward or selfish to shift the balance from taking care of everyone else to taking care of ourselves.

00:22 WELCOME BACK

10:32 AUDIENCE QUESTIONS

17:40 “THINGS WE DON’T LIKE IN MOTHERHOOD”

28:36 “WHAT MOMS DON’T DO FOR THEMSELVES”

36:05 PITS AND PEAKS

Navigating the Unplanned in Life (and balancing time with each kid) Apr 18, 2024

In this episode, we start off on a lighter note by sharing some of our pet peeves and our grossest moments as parents—you've been warned! We then explore deeper topics, discussing how to navigate the unexpected twists and turns of parenting. From career changes to the dramatic rush of not making it to the hospital in time to deliver a baby, we cover the spectrum of unplanned circumstances that parents often face.

We then focus on the importance of balancing time among our children. It's crucial that each child feels valued and receives individual attention. We share key insights on how unexpected moments can pave the way to significant achievements and how apparent failures can morph into successes. We also discuss strategies for finding moments for individual connection, like using drive times or cooking together as opportunities to bond. Additionally, we talk about cost-effective ways to spend quality time with your children and how to handle situations when kids "keep score" on who received more of what.

TIMESTAMPS

00:22 - WELCOME BACK

06:21 - MOST DISGUSTING MOMENTS

17:44 - AUDIENCE QUESTIONS

22:13 - UNPLANNED MOMENTS AS MOTHERS

35:30 - SPENDING TIME WITH KIDS

52:00 - PITS AND PEAKS

What’s the PERFECT Number of Kids (and the best age gaps?) Apr 04, 2024

In this episode, we delve into the intricate decision-making process concerning how many children to have and the considerations surrounding the age gaps between siblings. Our hosts, each with at least three children and experiencing age differences ranging from 17 months to 8 years, bring a wealth of personal insight to the discussion.

Kallie initiates the conversation by sharing insights on the diverse experiences of adapting to each new child, pointing out that the transition varies greatly with every addition and is significantly shaped by the age differences between siblings. Caitlin, Charlotte, and Megan then contribute their personal stories and the reasoning behind their choices regarding family size and the intervals between their children.

The big takeaways you’ll hear in this episode:

Individual Family Decisions: We delve into the unique considerations of each family, highlighting how choices are shaped by personal desires, financial implications, and the dynamics of each life situation.
Age Gaps Between Children: We explore a range of perspectives on sibling age differences, sharing our personal experiences along with the benefits and obstacles associated with various age gaps.
Navigating Transitions and Adjustments: We examine the assorted challenges encountered when introducing a new child into the family, stressing how these transitions are influenced by a multitude of factors.
Emotional Considerations: We discuss emotional motivations, such as the longing to revisit the baby phase or achieving a sense of familial completeness after reaching a certain number of children.
The Ideal Number or Age Gap: We tackle the question of whether there's a universally "perfect" number of children or an ideal age gap that fits every family, suggesting that the answer varies widely depending on individual family circumstances.

TIMESTAMPS

00:24:05 - WELCOME BACK

01:01:06 - INTRO

01:20:08 - LIFE UPDATES/MOM HACKS

07:36:01 - AUDIENCE QUESTIONS

14:32:04 - AGE GAPS

32:52:00 - PERFECT NUMBER OF KIDS

44:17:00 - HEALTH SEGMENT

49:47:01 - PITS & PEAKS

Emotional Labor and "The Mental Load" Mar 18, 2024

Welcome to the second episode of Room 4 Four! Every episode, we unpack the day-to-day topics that pique your curiosity and touch your life directly, from personal growth to the nuances of relationships. This episode starts on a light note with some fun questions about childhood comfort foods. But then as we get into it join us talking about the emotional landscapes experienced by mothers.

Caitlin shared her unexpectedly emotional experiences of having to hold her oldest daughter still during dental surgery. Megan recounted her emotional reaction to her daughter getting her first pair of pointe shoes, connecting her own childhood love for ballet. Kallie discussed the surprise in her own emotional responses as a mother, especially during moments like her son's birthday. And, Charlotte touched on the challenging transitions of her child's first day of kindergarten.

Other key points from the episode include:

• Emotional Labor: Caitlin introduced the concept of emotional labor, describing it as an often invisible load of emotions, planning, and multitasking primarily shouldered by mothers. This involves prioritizing the family's needs and desires, sometimes at the expense of their own well-being.

• Multitasking and Planning: The other hosts all echoed the sentiment of having to juggle multiple responsibilities and the constant mental load of managing a household, emphasizing the natural inclination of mothers to multitask and the exhaustion that comes with it.

• Doing it all: We chat about the feeling we can have as moms that we need to do it all, or think we should be able to do it all. But, as we had more kids being able to accept more help or allow others to step in.

• Personal sacrifices: How as moms we often put everyone ahead of ourselves. We put off calling the doctor for our own needs but would call immediately if it’s for our kids

This episode is sponsored by Sitter Connect. Sitter Connect offers a personalized service dedicated to connecting Connecticut families with highly recommended and qualified nannies and sitters. Their mission is to provide individualized and reliable care, ensuring the perfect match between a family’s needs and a caregiver’s qualifications. Whether it's for occasional, weekly, or last-minute needs, Sitter Connect strives to become an extension of your family, offering a personal touch service tailored to your unique requirements. Learn more at sitter-connect.com.

Making Friends as a Mom Mar 03, 2024

Welcome to the first episode of Room 4 Four! Join us where every episode we dive into topics you’re probably also wondering about on a daily basis from aging to screen time.

In our first episode you will...

1. Meet your hosts:

Charlotte - of At Charlotte’s House, sharing colorful design projects and inspiring women to explore new ideas and add joy to home decor.

Megan - creator of Campbymama, where I share motherhood humor, family adventures, fashion, and style.

Kallie - creator of the YouTube channel But First, Coffee where she shares home organization, frugal living, and motherhood tips, plus productivity hacks.

Caitlin - the voice behind the self-titled Caitlin Houston Blog, where she shares honest advice and humorous musings about motherhood and mental health.

2. Dive into a discussion about making friends as moms. How the dynamic of making friends changes in motherhood and the challenges around finding time for friendship.

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