Ahhhh..,my first "midterm" episode. Yes, midterm as in midterm exam. Don't break into a cold sweat. There isn't actually going to be an exam! When I think of a midterm, I think of a checkpoint. A time to stop and reflect on where I am now, and where I need to be by the time finals roll around. Midterm episodes will give us an opportunity to do some self-reflection and soul searching in terms of who we are, where we are, and where we want to be.
During these episodes I would suggest taking the time to jot down some notes so that months or even years from now you can look back and see how far you have come, how you have changed, and all you have accomplished. In this episode I talk about the general process of turning an aspiration into a reality:
- Write your goals and dreams down.Synthesizing abstract thoughts into words on paper allows you analyze their feasibility, determine what it is going to take to achieve them, and start thinking about what it would look like to take the first step toward them.
- Develop the deep and genuine belief that you can achieve what you've written. One of my favorite quotes (though I don't have any idea who said it) is "your mind has to arrive at the destination before your body does". This means that in order for anything to be achieved, we must see it in our mind first, then move toward it with a relentless persistence. In most cases, you are the only obstacle standing in your own way, once you allow yourself to believe that your goals are achievable, you can take the first step toward accomplishing them.
- Speak it out loud.I am such a firm believer that when you speak something out loud, you put it into the universe, and you have taken the first step toward making it a reality. Whether you end up accomplishing what you have told people you are going to do because you'd be ashamed if you did, or whether speaking it out loud gives you a deeper belief that it is possible, it doesn't matter. What matters is that you exclaim it with confidence and work until it is your reality.
To know where you want to go, you have to know where you are, who you are, and where you want to be. Obviously quantifying a successful or fulfilling life is difficult because for everyone it looks like something completely different. The best way I have found to measure success in my life is to define my core values, and make sure I'm living in accordance to my core values in every aspect of my life.
WHAT ARE CORE VALUES?
As you can tell from the name, core values are determined by who you are today and who you work towards being on a daily basis. Metaphors are my jam – so if you think or your life as house, your core values are the blueprint and foundation of the house. The kind of tiles on the floors and the colors you paint the walls are the frills, they don't determine the strength and structure of the house.
Too often we envision our life as a destination with phrases like "when I get there, this is what it will look like". In reality, the actual living part is more like a roadmap (pun absolutely intended). On a day-to-day basis, what turns are you taking? What decisions are you making? Once you get to the "destination", all you'll actually have is the culmination of what has occurred on the journey.
HOW DO YOU IDENTIFY CORE VALUES?
It is just a matter of being really honest with yourself and being very introspective. HERE is an exhaustive list of core values that I like to use.
- Scan through the list and write down 10 or so that resonate with you the most.
- From those 10, try to narrow it down to 2-5 that are central to your being. In this case, less is more!
- Defineyour core values.
- Make specific and achievable goals under each of your core values.
WHAT NEXT?
Now that you have identified who you are, what that means, and how you want to improve upon yourself it is important to think about how each of your core values show up in different aspects of your life. How do they show up in your work, your marriage, your friendships? Ask yourself:
- Are there any areas of my life in which I am straying from my core values?
- What does it look like when I am at my best and in alignment with my core values?
- Who benefits when I live in alignment with my core values?
- What steps can I take on a daily basis that will improve my quality of life and the quality of those around me?
I am a huge proponent of periodically writing your core values, their definitions, and your goals for each. Inevitably the definition of your core values and maybe even your core values themselves will change over time and it is so powerful to look back on who you were, how you've grown, and how far you've come.
I hope you enjoy this episode of the Roadmap to the Real World Podcast! Episode 3 is an amazing interview with Adrienne Brady. She graduated with a biology degree and had no clue what to do next. While working a job she hated, a food blog that she had started as a hobby turned into a passion and lead her to her current position as Media and Marketing Coordinator for a restaurant group.
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