Relationships 2.0 With Dr. Michelle Skeen

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Guest: Alexandra Kennedy, MA author of Honoring Grief: Creating a Space to Let Yourself Heal. Sep 10, 2014

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About the book: If you know someone who has suffered loss and is experiencing grief, simply sending a card or flowers may seem insufficient. Many people are unsure how to comfort a friend or loved-one in times of loss. This special book is filled with inspirational wisdom, practical self-help for healing, and makes a meaningful and comforting gift. Written by psychotherapist and grief expert Alexandra Kennedy, Honoring Griefprovides powerful and compassionate advice for dealing with loss. Compatible with any religious or spiritual orientation, this book aims to help readers create a sanctuary—a special space where they are free to work through the difficult emotions that accompany grief. The act of grieving can be overwhelming. That’s why the self-help tips in this book are simple, brief, and effective—ideal for anyone suffering the emotionally and physically exhausting effects of grief. About the author: Alexandra Kennedy, MA is a psychotherapist in private practice since 1976 and author of Losing a Parent (HarperCollins, 1991) and The Infinite Thread: Healing Relationships Beyond Loss (Beyond Words, April 2001), Offerings at the Edge (iUniverse 2007), and How Did I Miss All This Before? Waking Up to the Magic of Our Ordinary Lives (iUniverse, 2010). She was stunned by the power of her grief when her father was diagnosed with cancer in November 1988—even though she had been a psychotherapist for fourteen years and had attended death and dying workshops with Stephen Levine. Her father died three months later. She wrote Losing a Parent in the year following his death, sharing not only the story of her father’s dying and her grieving but also the resources and strategies that helped her move through her grief while raising a family. Since then, she has devoted much of her therapy practice, teaching, and writing to grief. In 2001 The Infinite Thread was published, with an emphasis on healing relationships beyond loss, along with issues not commonly explored, such as the grief handed down through generations. Her most recent book How Did I Miss All This Before?, an intimate account of courageous spiritual transformation in the midst of life’s common challenges, is written for everyone wishing to find greater openness to life in each precious moment. Alexandra lectures at universities, professional organizations and major conferences. Weaving together inspiring case histories, practical advice, and experiential exercises, she provides a unique perspective to grieving through her work with the imagination. She also offers lectures, workshops and seminars on facing loss as an opening to the sacred, the loss of a parent, healing relationships beyond loss, dreams as messengers of the night, women’s spirituality, mid-life renewal, the power of the imagination, the empty nest, and related issues.

Guest: Antonio Sausys, MA, CMT, RYT author of Yoga for Grief Relief: Simple practices for transforming your grieving mind & body. Sep 05, 2014

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About the book: If you’ve experienced loss, you may feel intense emotional or even physical pain. In fact, it’s not uncommon for grieving people to experience depression, anxiety, fatigue, and a variety of other physical, mental, and spiritual symptoms. If you’ve tried other ways to move beyond your loss but have yet to find relief, you may be surprised to discover the transformative effects of yoga. Yoga for Grief Relief combines over 100 illustrations of gentle yogic poses and the power of psychophysiology and neuroscience to help you recapture a true sense of well-being. You’ll also find breathing exercises, cleansing techniques, and self-relaxation tips to help you work through your loss and begin on the journey to self-knowledge and re-identification. At its core, yoga is about accepting change. If you are open to viewing your loss as an opportunity for growth, this book will help transform your grief with gentle clarity and awareness. To find out more, visit yogaforgriefrelief.com About the author: Antonio Sausys, MA, CMT, RYT, is a somatic psychotherapist and yoga instructor specializing in one-on-one yoga therapy for people with chronic and acute medical conditions, as well as emotional imbalance. He studied with yoga masters and teachers such as Indra Devi, Swami Maitreyananda, and Larry Payne. He has continued his professional development with training in integrative grief therapy with Lyn Prashant, foot reflexology, Swedish therapeutic massage, and Reiki. Antonio teaches and lectures periodically at the University of California, Berkeley; at the California Institute of Integral Studies, Kripalu Center for Yoga and Health. He is a member of the World Yoga Council, the International Association of Yoga Therapists, and the Association for Death Education and Counseling. He is the founder and executive director of Yoga for Health—the International Yoga Therapy Conference, and television host for YogiViews.

This week on Relationships 2.0 I will be interviewed by my colleague and friend Shawn T. Smith, PsyD about my new book, Love Me Don’t Leave Me: Overcoming Fear of Abandonment and Building Lasting, Loving Relationships. Aug 27, 2014

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About the book: Everyone thrives on love, comfort, and the safety of family, friends, and community. But if you are denied these basic comforts early in life, whether through a lack of physical affection or emotional bonding, you may develop intense fears of abandonment that can last well into adulthood—fears so powerful that they can actually cause you to push people away If you suffer from fears of abandonment, you may have underlying feelings of anger, shame, fear, anxiety, depression, and grief. These emotions are intense and painful, and when they surface they can lead to a number of negative behaviors, such as jealousy, clinging, and emotional blackmail. In Love Me, Don’t Leave Me,therapist Michelle Skeen combines acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT), schema therapy, and dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT) to help you identify the root of your fears. In this book you’ll learn how schema coping behaviors—deeply entrenched and automatic behaviors rooted in childhood experiences and fears—can take over and cause you to inadvertently sabotage your relationships. By recognizing these coping behaviors and understanding their cause, you will not only gain powerful insights into your own mind, but also into the minds of those around you. If you are ready to break the self-fulfilling cycle of mistrust, clinginess, and heartbreak and start building lasting, trusting relationships, this book will be your guide. About the Author: Michelle Skeen, PsyD, is a therapist who lives and works in San Francisco. She has provided brief and long-term therapy for individuals and couples utilizing schema, cognitive, behavioral and mindfulness-based therapies to address interpersonal issues, weight management, anger, depression, anxiety, disabilities, and trauma. Skeen has studied schema therapy under Jeffrey Young PhD and Wendy Behary and completed her postdoctoral work at the University of California, San Francisco. She is the author of Love Me Don’t Leave Me: Overcoming Fear of Abandonment and Building Lasting, Loving Relationships and The Critical Partner: How to End the Cycle of Criticism and Get the Love You Want. Michelle is coauthor of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy for Interpersonal Problems: Using Mindfulness, Acceptance and Schema Awareness to Change Interpersonal Behaviors and The Interpersonal Problems Workbook: ACT to End Painful Relationship Patterns. She is currently working on her fifth book for New Harbinger Publications. Michelle is part-time faculty at Notre Dame de Namur University. She hosts a weekly radio show called Relationships 2.0 with Dr. Michelle Skeen on KCAA-1050AM. To find out more about Michelle Skeen, PsyD visit her website at:michelleskeen.com, “like” her on Facebook MichelleSkeenPsyD, and follow her on twitter @michelle_skeen.

Guest: Christopher Willard PsyD, author of Mindfulness for Teen Anxiety: A Workbook for Overcoming Anxiety at Home, at School, and Everywhere Else. Aug 20, 2014

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About the book:Being a teen is hard enough without anxiety getting in the way. You are changing more than ever before, not just physically, but mentally. And if you suffer from panic attacks, chronic worry, and feelings of isolation, it can be very difficult to meet your goals and succeed. The good news is that there are real, powerful ways that you can take control of your anxiety—and your life! In Mindfulness for Teen Anxiety, psychologist and learning specialist Christopher Willard offers teens like you proven-effective, mindfulness-based practices to help you cope with your anxiety, identify common triggers (such as dating or school performance), learn valuable time-management skills, and feel more calm at home, at school, and with friends. You’ll learn tips for dealing with specific situations that cause anxiety, such as public speaking, social anxiety, test anxiety, and more. You’ll also learn special breathing exercises to help calm you in moments of panic, and guided visualization exercises to help you stay cool and collected, even in the tensest situations. If you are ready to move past your anxiety, panic, and worry and start living the life you were meant to live, this book will be your guide—every step of the way. About the author: Christopher Willard received his Bachelor’s degree from Wesleyan University, where he first became interested in meditation. Over the past ten years, he has attended workshops and retreats with a number of Buddhist teachers including Thich Nhat Hanh, Jack Kornfield, Pema Chodron, Noah Levine, and others in both the U.S. and in Asia. In the past few years, he has taught meditation to a wide range of people, from young children to recently paroled murderers, to psychotherapists. He completed his postdoctoral training in clinical psychology at Tufts University where he now works as a psychotherapist. He has consulted to and been quoted in a number of print and online publications. Christopher lives in Cambridge, Massachusetts and when not working he enjoys traveling, cooking, hiking, reading and any combination of these he can manage.

Guest: Jamie Beckman author of The Frisky 30-Day Breakup Guide. Aug 13, 2014

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About the book: Bad breakup? You’re in good company! Women everywhere know that those first days after the end of a relationship can be the hardest. The Frisky 30-Day Breakup Guide takes the focus off of your ex and puts it back on you. Each day offers fun activities to help you move on, including: • Going on an exciting road trip – Day 5 • Buying a sexy new dress – Day 8 • Planning a fabulous, girls-only party – Day 15• Donating your time to a worthy cause – Day 21 Plus advice and wisdom from celebrities like Audrina Patridge, Colbie Caillat and Vivica A. Fox. Hey, this is your sexy, vibrant, exciting life. So go ahead: get back to the real, fabulous you! About the author: Jamie Beckman is a freelance magazine writer, columnist for the women’s website SheKnows.com and its Sexcerpts relationships-news blog, and the author of the book The Frisky 30-Day Breakup Guide. She has worked as a writer and editor since she graduated from the University of Missouri School of Journalism. Jamie has written about health, nutrition, fitness, relationships, sex, and style for publications and websites including Redbook, USA TODAY, the L.A. Times, Health, Men’s Journal, Men’s Health, Best Life, Better Homes and Gardens, First for Women, Publishers Weekly, The Frisky, BudgetTravel.com, CNN.com, The Good Men Project, CMJ.com, and Crushable.com. Her favorite interview was Animal House’s Flounder — very nice guy. Jamie has been quoted as a relationships expert in media outlets includingSeventeen magazine, the Orange County Register, FoxNews.com, the Seattle Times, the Sacramento Bee, CondéNastTraveler.com, and BlogHer.com and contributed a personal essay to the 2012 anthology Madonna and Me: Women Writers on the Queen of Pop. She judged the 2008, 2009, 2010, and 2012 Amazon Breakthrough Novel awards. She lives in New York City.

Guest: Mark Purcell PsyD, author of Mindfulness for Teen Anger: A Workbook to Overcome Anger and Aggression Using MBSR and DBT Skills. Aug 06, 2014

Show notes

About the book: Do you ever feel so frustrated with school, friends, parents, and life in general that you lose control of your emotions and lash out? You shouldn’t feel ashamed. Being a teen in today’s world is hard, but it’s even harder when you’re unable to keep your cool in stressful situations. Fortunately, there are things you can do to make positive changes in your life. Using proven effective mindfulness-based stress reduction (MBSR) and dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT), Mindfulness for Teen Anger will teach you the difference between healthy and unhealthy forms of anger. Inside, you’ll learn how to make better choices, how to stop overreacting, find emotional balance, and be more aware of your thoughts and feelings in the moment. You’ll also learn skills for building positive relationships with peers, friends, and family. As a teen, the relationship skills you learn now can help you thrive in the future. With a little help, and by cultivating compassion and understanding for yourself and others, you will be able to transform your fear and anger into confidence and kindness. About the author: Mark Purcell is a clinical psychologist, professor, and author. He has been working with youth and families for over twenty years. His professional experience has ranged from providing psychotherapy to youth to developing specialized treatment programs and teaching professionals and graduate students. Mark has particular interests in Mindfulness based therapeutic approaches, such as DBT and MBSR, as well as treating trauma and substance abuse.

Guest: Nicola P. Wright PhD CPsych co-author of Treating Psychosis: A Clinician’s Guide to Integrating Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, Compassion-Focused Therapy, and Mindfulness Approaches within the Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Tradition Jul 30, 2014

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About the book: Psychosis can be associated with a variety of mental health problems, including schizophrenia, severe depression, bipolar disorder, anxiety, and post-traumatic stress disorders. While traditional treatments for psychosis have emphasized medication-based strategies, evidence now suggests that individuals affected by psychosis can greatly benefit from psychotherapy. Treating Psychosis is an evidence-based treatment guide for mental health professionals working with individuals affected by psychosis. Using a cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) approach that incorporates acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT), compassion-focused therapy (CFT) and mindfulness approaches, this book is invaluable in helping clinicians develop effective treatment for clients affected by psychosis. The guide provides session-by-session clinical interventions for use in individual or group treatment on an inpatient, outpatient, or community basis. The book features 40 reproducible clinical practice forms and a companion website with additional downloadable clinical forms and tools, guided exercises, case examples, and resources. The therapeutic approaches presented are rooted in theory and research, and informed by extensive clinical experience working with client populations affected by psychosis. The approaches outlined in this book offer clinicians and clients the opportunity to partner in developing therapeutic strategies for problematic symptoms to enable those affected by psychosis to work toward valued goals and ultimately live more meaningful lives. This guide emphasizes a compassionate, de-stigmatizing approach that integrates empowering and strengths-oriented methods that place the client’s values and goals at the center of any therapeutic intervention. About the author: Nicola P. Wright, PhD, CPsych, is a clinical psychologist in the schizophrenia program of the Royal Ottawa Health Care Group (The Royal). She also held the roles of chief of psychology and director of training for the Royal’s Psychology Residency Program and served as president of the Canadian Council of Professional Psychology Programs. Wright provides individual and group therapy, as well as professional training workshops, integrating acceptance and commitment; mindfulness; and compassion-focused approaches in cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) for people who experience psychosis. Wright is an active researcher and clinical professor in the School of Psychology at the University of Ottawa and a lecturer with the department of psychiatry, University of Ottawa. In addition, she is a founding member of the Canadian Association of CBT and a staff supervisor with the Beck Institute of CBT. Wright lives in Ottawa, Canada.

Guest: Amy J. L. Baker, PhD, author of Co-parenting with a Toxic Ex: What to Do When Your Ex-Spouse Tries to Turn the Kids Against You Jul 23, 2014

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About the book: There’s no question about it: your children are the most important thing in your life. But if you have gone through a messy divorce, your relationship with your children may become strained if you have to deal with a toxic ex. Your ex may bad-mouth you in front of the kids, accuse you of being a bad parent, and even attempt to replace you in the children’s lives with a new partner. As a result, your children may become confused, conflicted, angry, anxious, or depressed—and you may feel powerless. In Co-parenting with a Toxic Ex, a nationally recognized parenting expert offers you a positive parenting approach to dealing with a hostile ex-spouse. You’ll learn to avoid the most common mistakes of coparenting, how to avoid “parental alienation syndrome,” and effective techniques for talking to your children in a way that fosters open and honest response. In addition, you’ll learn how to protect your children from painful loyalty conflicts between you and your ex-spouse. Divorce is often painful, especially if your ex habitually tries to undermine your relationship with your children. But with the right tools you can protect your kids and make your relationship with them stronger than ever. This book can show you how. About the author: Amy J. L. Baker, PhD, is a national expert on children caught in loyalty conflicts and has written a seminal book on the topic, Adult Children of Parental Alienation Syndrome, published by W.W. Norton and Company. In addition to conducting trainings around the country for parents as well as legal and mental health professionals, Baker has written dozens of scholarly articles on topics related to parent-child relationships and has appeared on national TV, including Good Morning America, CNN, and the Joy Behar Show. She has been quoted in the New York Times and US News and World Report, among other print media outlets. Baker graduated from Barnard College, summa cum laude and Phi Beta Kappa. She has a PhD in human development from Teachers College, Columbia University. More information is available on her website at www.amyjlbaker.com.

Guest: Karen Maezen Miller author of Hand Wash Cold: Care Instructions for an Ordinary Life. Jul 17, 2014

Show notes

It’s easy to think that meaning, fulfillment, and bliss are “out there,” somewhere outside of our daily routine. But in this playful yet profound reflection on awareness, the compelling voice of a contemporary woman reveals the happiness at the bottom of the laundry basket, the love in the kitchen sink, and the peace possible in one’s own backyard. Follow Karen Maezen Miller through youthful ambition and self-absorption, beyond a broken marriage, and into the steady calm of a so-called ordinary life. In her hands, household chores and caregiving tasks become opportunities for self-examination, lessons in relationship, and liberating moments of selflessness. With attention, it’s the little things — even the unexpected, unpleasant, and unwanted things — that count. About the author: Karen Maezen Miller is a wife and mother as well as a Zen Buddhist priest at the Hazy Moon Zen Center in Los Angeles. She and her family live in Sierra Madre, California, with a century-old Japanese garden in their backyard. She writes about spirituality in everyday life. She is the author of Paradise in Plain Sight: Lessons from a Zen Garden, Hand Wash Cold: Care Instructions for an Ordinary Life, Momma Zen: Walking the Crooked Path of Motherhood, and her writing is included in numerous anthologies. www.karenmaezenmiller.com

Guest: Thomas Roberts, LCSW, LMFT, author of Beginner’s Eye: Contemplative Photography for the Soul Jul 09, 2014

Show notes

About the book: Explore how photography can allow you to see things in ways that you may have otherwise missed. Beginner’s Eye is a unique contemplative/meditation experience that utilizes photography to slow things down and enhance the way we see our world in novel and original ways. This allows us to uncover the color, texture and beauty that is normally hidden from view. Beginner’s Eye is based on the Zen notion of “beginner’s mind; ” that open and spacious place when we are completely receptive, fearless, totally present and connected to the wonder of each moment. A pure clear contemplative seeing awareness where everything is fresh and new. Cultivating Beginner’s Eye deepens our connection with our true selves and our world around us; ultimately emphasizing our “being serene in the oneness of things.” You do not need to be a photographer in order to become a comtemplative photographer through the experience of Beginner’s Eye. It is not about what you see; rather how you see it. The meditative/contemplative approach of Beginner’s Eye will help you notice things in the world as if seeing them for the first time. Let the photograph find you! From the author: I have a clinical psychotherapy practice in Onalaska, Wisconsin. I work with people who are determined to embrace their healing journey. I embrace and respect the mind-body connection and use mind-body therapies such as imagery, hypnotherapy, sounds, music and the like. I enjoy being in the presence of people on their healing journey! The people who have shared their journey with me have been my greatest teachers!I also have a passion for teaching and conducting retreats. At this time in my life, I have come to realize that it is time to give back. All that I have been taught, learned, and come to understand, is now to be shared with others. Being able to share the mindfulness and healing journey with people is part of my own journey. I have taught hundreds of workshops and retreats around the country and have been enriched by the people I have had the privilege of meeting along the way. They too have been my teachers. I am a practicing Buddhist and have been for 30+ years. Many teachers have helped me along the way. Yet at this point I have returned to my cushion and local Sangha as the true journey is the one to be embraced as you move through the flow of your own personal experience. I spent many years following teachers only to return to the true teacher: my life as it unfolds. This teacher has always been there, and I have realized there is really nowhere else to look. My book reflects this. So, I hope you enjoy. Visit my web site: thomasrobertsllc.com

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