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    Kids & Family

    Reflective Parenting Podcast by Curious Neuron

    You don’t snap at your kids because you’re a bad parent. You snap because your stress builds faster than your awareness, and no one ever taught you how to handle that.

    I’m Dr. Cindy Hovington, a mom of three with a doctorate in neuroscience and founder of Curious Neuron. I created The Reflective Parenting Podcast for parents who care deeply, know a lot, and still find themselves overwhelmed in the real moments.

    This is not a podcast where I tell you how to be a perfect parent. I’m in it with you.

    Each week, I invite you into my own reflections:

    • what I’m learning from scientific articles and books,
    • what I’m noticing in my nervous system and emotions,
    • and what real parents and experts teach me in conversation.

    Together, we get curious about why we snap, shut down, or over-function in conflict, and what’s actually happening in our brain and body when we do. We talk about stress, shame, repair, boundaries, playfulness, and the quiet moments no one sees—so you can start to recognize your patterns and gently shift them.

    By listening, you’ll learn to:

    • notice your stress and body signals earlier,
    • understand the lenses and stories that intensify hard moments,
    • regulate your nervous system when parenting feels like “too much”,
    • and handle conflict with more calm, clarity, and repair.
    • But more than that, you’ll have a companion in the work.

    I’ll share where I struggle, what I’m practicing, and how I’m trying to grow, so you don’t feel like the only parent who finds this hard.

    If you’re ready to move away from “perfect” parenting and toward reflective parenting—where every tough moment becomes data, not failure—pull up a chair. 

    Let’s learn, feel, and grow together.

    Find out which book I will be covering next month:

    https://curiousneuron.com/podcast/ 

    Join the private group on Facebook:

    www.facebook.com/groups/reflectiveparentingpodcast/

    Start training your emotional awareness for FREE:

    https://tremendous-hustler-7333.kit.com/84371dc0b2

    Purchase my course The Emotionally Aware Parent.

    https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/

    Follow us on Instagram @drcindyhovington or Facebook @curiousneuronparenting

    Advertise

    Copyright: © 2024 Curious Neuron | Science of Parental Well-Being

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    Latest Episodes:
    A science-based tool that helps you shift your perspective (and build your resilience) Aug 04, 2025
    Show notes

    Send us Fan Mail

    In this episode, we explore the idea of “shifting your lens” — a powerful metaphor grounded in science that helps parents understand how their interpretation of a situation shapes their emotional response. Drawing on the work of psychologist James Gross and his research on cognitive reappraisal, we break down how the lens you’re wearing (like blame, control, or shame) can fuel conflict and dysregulation, especially in moments of parenting stress.

    You’ll learn how to identify the lens you’re in, how to shift your lens to something more helpful (like curiosity or compassion), and how this shift not only supports your own regulation but also helps you model emotional intelligence for your child. Real-life parenting examples, practical tips, and reflection prompts will help you bring this tool into everyday moments even when things get messy.

    Read our blog post here:

    https://curiousneuron.com/2025/08/03/how-to-shift-your-lens-and-stay-calm-in-parenting-conflicts/

    Read a science article:

    For Whom and What Does Cognitive Reappraisal Help? A Prospective

    Study

    Watch it on YouTube:

    https://youtu.be/TOURlBqtmIc

    Support the show

    • Join the Reflective Parent Book Club for only $9.99 for the year: https://reflectiveparentclub.circle.so/checkout/reflective-parenting-book-club
    1. Watch my Tedx Talk on YouTube called The Over-Educated, Emotionally Underprepared Parent: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDYJFY_9K9E&t=19s
    • Grab my course for $99, The Emotionally Aware Parent: https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/

    Can Parenting Style Differences Hurt Your Child? Here's What the Science Says Jul 28, 2025
    Show notes

    Send us Fan Mail

    Are you following positive parenting but your partner is more authoritarian?

    This is a common question I receive from parents and so in today's episode, I share a study that was fascinating to me.

    In this solo episode, I talk about how you can address parenting differences with your partner without making them feel bad, I chat about the different parenting style and I answer the question of what the long-term impacts are to having different parenting styles.

    Source: Differences in perceived parenting style between mothers and fathers: Implications for child outcomes and marital conflict.

    Read a blog post about this study on our website:

    https://curiousneuron.com/2025/07/28/can-parenting-style-differences-hurt-your-child-heres-what-the-science-says/

    Watch on YouTube:

    https://youtu.be/wpl1LkhK4B4?si=AfrHaOtasFd2529q


    Listen to this podcast to learn more about parenting styles:

    Nurturing a secure attachment with reflection skills

    The Science of Modern Parenting

    Support the show

    • Join the Reflective Parent Book Club for only $9.99 for the year: https://reflectiveparentclub.circle.so/checkout/reflective-parenting-book-club
    1. Watch my Tedx Talk on YouTube called The Over-Educated, Emotionally Underprepared Parent: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDYJFY_9K9E&t=19s
    • Grab my course for $99, The Emotionally Aware Parent: https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/

    How does your child respond to stress in conflict? Jul 21, 2025
    Show notes

    Send us Fan Mail

    Have you ever asked yourself this question?

    In today's episode, I give you a different perspective on your child's behaviour....understanding how they respond to conflict. This is important because it impacts their behaviour in conflict (which is what we see when they "misbehave"). I hope you enjoy this solo episode!

    SOURCES:

    I look back at my conversation with Dr. Marc Brackett as well. You can listen to this episode below in case you missed it:

    https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/reflective-parenting-by-curious-neuron/id1440533170?i=1000640865943

    Below is the article I mention "RSA reactivity to parent-child conflict as a predictor of dysregulated emotion and behavior in daily life"

    https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC7908813/pdf/nihms-1668983.pdf

    The blog post related to this podcast:

    https://curiousneuron.com/2025/07/20/child-conflict-stress-response-behaviour/

    Watch it on YouTube:

    https://youtu.be/NwH988IDIi4

    Support the show

    • Join the Reflective Parent Book Club for only $9.99 for the year: https://reflectiveparentclub.circle.so/checkout/reflective-parenting-book-club
    1. Watch my Tedx Talk on YouTube called The Over-Educated, Emotionally Underprepared Parent: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDYJFY_9K9E&t=19s
    • Grab my course for $99, The Emotionally Aware Parent: https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/

    I wish I were a more playful parent Jul 14, 2025
    Show notes

    Send us Fan Mail

    In this episode of the Reflective Parenting Podcast, host Cindy Hovington delves into the transformative power of playfulness in parenting. Drawing from personal experiences and expert insights, Cindy explores how embracing play can enhance parent-child connections and support emotional development.

    Discover practical tips to integrate play into daily routines, even when it feels challenging, and learn why joining your child's world can be a game-changer. Tune in for a heartfelt discussion that encourages parents to let go of guilt and embrace the joy of play.

    Use CODE: PODCAST15 to get 15% off your first 3 months of the Reflective Parenting Club

    Resources:

    Study: Quality and Quantity: A Study of Father–Toddler Rough-and-Tumble Play

    Listen to my interview with Dr. Tina Payne Bryson and Amy Chiu:

    Supporting Emotional Development Through Play with Tina

    What happens when we let kids be kids with Amy

    Support the show

    • Join the Reflective Parent Book Club for only $9.99 for the year: https://reflectiveparentclub.circle.so/checkout/reflective-parenting-book-club
    1. Watch my Tedx Talk on YouTube called The Over-Educated, Emotionally Underprepared Parent: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDYJFY_9K9E&t=19s
    • Grab my course for $99, The Emotionally Aware Parent: https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/

    Invalidation in your relationship: Understanding the impact of dismissing emotions Jul 07, 2025
    Show notes

    Send us Fan Mail

    In this podcast episode, I delve into invalidation and its significant impact on romantic relationships. I highlight common invalidating statements such as "Why are you upset?", "You're overreacting," or "Calm down," explaining that these make a partner feel their emotions are wrong, unjustified, or excessive. This can lead to increased frustration, shame, and a sense of being alone in their struggle, mirroring the hurt children feel when invalidated.

    I emphasize the importance of using validating alternatives, such as "I see that you're feeling upset. Can you tell me what's making you feel this way?" or "It sounds like you're feeling anxious right now. That must be really uncomfortable. How can I support you?". These phrases aim to make the partner feel seen and heard, fostering connection and reducing conflict.

    I then introduce a study on marital conflict behaviors, categorizing them into three styles:

    •Destructive: Includes actions like yelling, insults, criticism, or bringing up past issues.

    •Constructive: Involves calm discussion, active listening, saying nice things, or trying to make a spouse laugh.

    •Withdrawal: Entails disengaging, such as becoming quiet or leaving the situation.

    The study found that, as expected, husbands and wives who reported using more destructive behaviors had a higher rate of divorce. A particularly fascinating and counter-intuitive finding was that greater constructive behaviors among wives predicted greater divorce rates. Learn more in this episode!


    Listen to my conversation with author of Validation, Dr. Caroline Fleck:

    https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/reflective-parenting-by-curious-neuron/id1440533170?i=1000715100953


    Read the full study:

    https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC3777640/pdf/nihms494814.pdf

    Support the show

    • Join the Reflective Parent Book Club for only $9.99 for the year: https://reflectiveparentclub.circle.so/checkout/reflective-parenting-book-club
    1. Watch my Tedx Talk on YouTube called The Over-Educated, Emotionally Underprepared Parent: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDYJFY_9K9E&t=19s
    • Grab my course for $99, The Emotionally Aware Parent: https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/

    Psychologist shares how learning the skill of validation can transform your relationships Jun 30, 2025
    Show notes

    Send us Fan Mail

    Do you ever wonder why your child’s big emotions feel so overwhelming—or why small conflicts with your partner can spiral? In this episode, I sit down with psychologist Dr. Caroline Fleck to unpack the skill of validation—what it is, why it matters, and how it can radically change the way you connect with yourself, your kids, and everyone you love.

    We explore what invalidation really sounds like (it’s often subtle) and why even well-meaning parents can accidentally shut down their child’s emotions. Dr. Fleck shares simple, powerful scripts for validating feelings without condoning hurtful behaviors, and we discuss research showing how invalidation increases the risk of mental health struggles and gets passed across generations.

    Whether you’re parenting a toddler or a teen—or just want more connected relationships—this episode will give you tools to break cycles of invalidation and build deeper trust through emotional clarity.

    Don’t miss this conversation—because learning to “validate the valid” might be the most important parenting skill you ever master.

    Sources:

    Caroline's Book: Validation (amazon.ca and amazon.com)


    Science Sources:

    Examining the intergenerational transmission of parental invalidation: Extension of the biosocial model


    Parental Validation and Invalidation Predict Adolescent Self- Harm

    Support the show

    • Join the Reflective Parent Book Club for only $9.99 for the year: https://reflectiveparentclub.circle.so/checkout/reflective-parenting-book-club
    1. Watch my Tedx Talk on YouTube called The Over-Educated, Emotionally Underprepared Parent: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDYJFY_9K9E&t=19s
    • Grab my course for $99, The Emotionally Aware Parent: https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/

    What Happens When You Let Kids Just Be Kids? (And Why It Matters) Jun 22, 2025
    Show notes

    Send us Fan Mail

    with Amy Chiu

    In today’s fast-paced world, it can be tough to slow down and truly let kids be kids. We often get caught up in schedules, expectations, and the pressure to “make learning happen.” But what if the most powerful learning happens when we pause, play, and simply show up with presence?

    In this episode, Dr. Cindy Hovington speaks with early childhood expert Amy Chiu about the magic of free play and the importance of slowing down. Amy explains how play isn’t just fun—it’s a key tool for building curiosity, emotional regulation, and problem-solving. She shares why giving kids space to lead their play fosters deeper learning than worksheets ever could.

    Whether you're a parent, caregiver, or educator, you'll find science-backed insights and simple, practical ways to support your child—by doing less.

    🔑 What You’ll Hear:

    • Why slowing down and free play matter for real learning
    • How presence and pause transform connection
    • The power of observing rather than directing kids’ play
    • Simple ways to bring downtime and emotional check-ins into daily life

    Related Podcast Episode:

    Over-parenting (helicopter parenting)

    Mentioned in This Episode:
    📖 The Work of Play→ Amy Chiu’s website and resource hub for parents and educators reimagining early childhood learning.

    Follow Amy on LinkedIn:

    https://www.linkedin.com/in/amy-chiu-msed-a09a1a27b/

    Scientific Article: Learning Through Play at School – A Framework for Policy and Practice

    Support the show

    • Join the Reflective Parent Book Club for only $9.99 for the year: https://reflectiveparentclub.circle.so/checkout/reflective-parenting-book-club
    1. Watch my Tedx Talk on YouTube called The Over-Educated, Emotionally Underprepared Parent: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDYJFY_9K9E&t=19s
    • Grab my course for $99, The Emotionally Aware Parent: https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/

    How not having a present father impacted my life Jun 16, 2025
    Show notes

    Send us Fan Mail

    In today's solo episode, I share a little more of my personal story with the hopes of helping you feel validated, less alone or even empowered.

    Father's Day (or even Mother's Day) can be difficult when you have a parent that is alive yet you have no idea where they are because they left your family decades ago.

    They knew you existed and they chose to leave you.

    I share a little more about my childhood and about how that impacted me later when I became a parent.

    Do you have a story you want to share (anonymously) with me about your own dad or your journey as a dad? Click the link below!

    https://curiousneuron.typeform.com/to/kd6zw438


    Here is the study I referred to in the episode in case you want more details.

    https://www.cambridge.org/core/services/aop-cambridge-core/content/view/1342C24F368FB2953C342AFF875E04A6/S0954579423000354a.pdf/div-class-title-father-contribution-to-human-resilience-div.pdf

    If you are a dad ready to learn how to cope and regulate your emotions, try out the Reflective Parent Club, free for 7 days before committing. See link below.

    Support the show

    • Join the Reflective Parent Book Club for only $9.99 for the year: https://reflectiveparentclub.circle.so/checkout/reflective-parenting-book-club
    1. Watch my Tedx Talk on YouTube called The Over-Educated, Emotionally Underprepared Parent: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDYJFY_9K9E&t=19s
    • Grab my course for $99, The Emotionally Aware Parent: https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/

    Working parent guilt: What no one tells you Jun 09, 2025
    Show notes

    Send us Fan Mail

    with Daisy Dowling

    Balancing work and parenting feels impossible sometimes, doesn’t it? Between deadlines, meetings, and the constant demands at home, many working parents feel overwhelmed, guilty, and stretched too thin.

    In this episode, Dr. Cindy Hovington talks with Daisy Dowling, author of Work Parent, about redefining what work-life balance really means — and why aiming for a perfect “straight line” isn’t the goal. Instead, Daisy shares practical “hacks” to help working parents manage stress, set realistic expectations, and take meaningful moments for rest and self-care.

    They dive into how to build your personal and professional “brand,” why keeping an “already done” list can lower overwhelm, and how small choices today can lead to a happier future — both at work and at home.

    This episode is full of relatable insights and actionable strategies to help working parents feel less frazzled and more grounded.

    🔑 What You’ll Hear:

    • Why work-life balance isn’t a fixed state — it’s more like riding waves
    • How to define your professional and parenting “brands” to empower your identity
    • The Zeigarnik Effect & the power of an “already done” list to combat overwhelm and guilt
    • Why rest and recovery are essential — even in small daily moments
    • Tips to reframe self-doubt and reduce anxiety about work performance

    Mentioned in This Episode:
    📖 Work Parent by Daisy Dowling

    → A go-to guide for working parents struggling with the dual challenges of careers & kids.


    Scientific Source:

    Burnout and Mental Health in Working Parents: Risk Factors and Practice Implications


    Read our blog post:

    https://curiousneuron.com/2025/06/08/parental-burnout-is-real-what-every-working-parent-needs-to-know/


    Support the show

    • Join the Reflective Parent Book Club for only $9.99 for the year: https://reflectiveparentclub.circle.so/checkout/reflective-parenting-book-club
    1. Watch my Tedx Talk on YouTube called The Over-Educated, Emotionally Underprepared Parent: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDYJFY_9K9E&t=19s
    • Grab my course for $99, The Emotionally Aware Parent: https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/

    2 min reflection for days you feel like you are failing at parenting Jun 04, 2025
    Show notes

    Send us Fan Mail

    Hi dear friends,

    From the number of you that downloaded our last grounding meditation, it seems like you enjoyed it!

    I decided to created another one for you, this time it is to help you on a day when you feel like you are failing.

    https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/reflective-parenting-by-curious-neuron/id1440533170?i=1000709341181

    If there is a specific moment you struggle with, tell me in the form below and I will create an audio for this moment.

    https://curiousneuron.typeform.com/to/UoUF6piC

    I hope you enjoy it!

    Support the show

    • Join the Reflective Parent Book Club for only $9.99 for the year: https://reflectiveparentclub.circle.so/checkout/reflective-parenting-book-club
    1. Watch my Tedx Talk on YouTube called The Over-Educated, Emotionally Underprepared Parent: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDYJFY_9K9E&t=19s
    • Grab my course for $99, The Emotionally Aware Parent: https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/

    Previous 1 3 4 5 6 7 28 Next

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