Raising Boys & Girls

Latest Episodes:

Episode 422: Managing Emotions in Capable Kids with David and Sissy Oct 27, 2026

Show notes

The episode moves the Capable series from strengths to skills, which are things kids have to be taught and practice, like tying their shoes. Managing emotions comes first. Sissy and David ask parents to notice their own reflex when a child is upset. Are they a fixer, a matcher, a minimizer, or a regulator? They point to research on co-regulation showing that kids borrow an adult’s steadiness before they can calm themselves. From there they walk through the steps: name the feeling (“name it to tame it”), validate it without approving the behavior, and skip the lecture while a child’s “downstairs brain” is in charge. A code word chosen ahead of time and a family list of 20 calming strategies both help. One memorable example is a fifth grader who prayed through the alphabet to fall asleep. The episode ends with a “try this at home” challenge for parents to notice their own patterns and to ask their kids, “What helps your feelings not feel quite so big?”

Resources mentioned:

Strong and Smart by David Thomas
I Am Capable by David Thomas and Sissy Goff
The Daystar Dog series by David Thomas and Sissy Goff
Feelings Chart
Dan Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson’s “upstairs and downstairs brain” model
A 2024 systematic review on parent–child co-regulation
A meta-analysis of 53 studies linking parents’ emotion regulation to their children’s
A brain imaging study on affect labeling (naming an emotion lowered activity in the amygdala)

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Episode 421: Writing Your Child's Story While Writing Your Own with Craig Melvin Oct 22, 2026

Show notes

Sissy and David sit down in New York with Craig Melvin to talk about his book Pops, a love letter to his father, who is now in recovery after 15 years of addiction. Craig shares how growing up with an absent dad made him and his wife Lindsay put being present first, even though they sometimes overcorrect. His reminder to his family is “if everything is special, nothing is special.” He talks about helping his kids find their people, and about how years of covering tragedy taught him that the hills and valleys are what build resilience. He hopes his kids will someday remember the awkward bedtime talks and beach walks more than the big VIP moments.

Resources mentioned:

Pops: Learning to Be a Son and a Father by Craig Melvin
I’m Proud of You by Craig Melvin
Glass Half Full with Craig Melvin
Dads Got This! Craig Melvin’s show

. . . . . .

Order our new book, Capable, here!!

See our speaking dates, purchase books and check out our courses here.. . . . . .

If you would like to partner with Raising Boys and Girls as a podcast sponsor, fill out our⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Advertise With Us⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ form.

BOLL & BRANCH: Get 15% off plus free shipping on your first set of sheets at Bollandbranch.com/rbg⁠. Exclusions apply.

QUINCE: Go to ⁠Quince.com/rbg⁠ for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns.

AG1: Go to DrinkAG.com/RBG and get a free Immune Support Bundle, including a bottle of Omega-3 fish oil and a bottle of Vitamin D3K2, with your first subscription order of AG1 Next Gen or AG1 Pro.

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Episode 420: Growing Gratitude in Capable Kids with David and Sissy Oct 20, 2026

Show notes

Gratitude can sound like the soft strength in the capability series. Sissy and David argue it’s an essential one, because it teaches kids to hold two realities at once instead of pretending the hard thing isn’t there. They warn against “you should be grateful” responses that shut down emotions and can leave kids feeling shame. Instead, they encourage parents to let feelings have room before helping kids “widen the lens.” Sissy shares how her family’s “wow” practice, borrowed from Kathryn Price’s “delight” finger, now has four-year-old Whit stopping to notice joy at Disney. The hosts offer concrete ideas: name gratitude out loud, ask fresh questions, use “and” instead of “but,” make a gratitude album, write a gratitude letter, and do a gratitude scavenger hunt. They close with a challenge for this week: ask your family “What was hard today, and what was good today?” Then just listen.

Resources mentioned:

Episode 359: A Roadmap to Technology (and Fun) for Families with Catherine Price

. . . . . .

Order our new book, Capable, here!!

See our speaking dates, purchase books and check out our courses here.. . . . . .

If you would like to partner with Raising Boys and Girls as a podcast sponsor, fill out our⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Advertise With Us⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ form.

BOLL & BRANCH: Get 15% off plus free shipping on your first set of sheets at Bollandbranch.com/rbg⁠. Exclusions apply.

QUINCE: Go to ⁠Quince.com/rbg⁠ for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns.

AG1: Go to DrinkAG.com/RBG and get a free Immune Support Bundle, including a bottle of Omega-3 fish oil and a bottle of Vitamin D3K2, with your first subscription order of AG1 Next Gen or AG1 Pro.

CHRISTIAN HEALTHSHARE MINISTRIES: Take charge of your healthcare by visiting chministries.org/solution.

HIYA: Visit hiyahealth.com/rbg for 50% off your first order.

OUR PLACE: Stop cooking with toxic cookware, and upgrade to Our Place today. Visit fromourplace.com/RBG and use code RBG for 10% off sitewide.

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Episode 419: Building Resilience, Perspective, and Hope Amidst Hard News with Vicky Nguyen Oct 15, 2026

Show notes

As part of the Strengths, Skills, and Strategies podcast season, NBC's Vicky Nguyen shares her family's escape from Vietnam by boat and how growing up as the perpetual "new kid" built her grit. Now she and her husband "manufacture hardship" for their three daughters, like having their middle daughter tell her Taekwondo master herself that she was quitting, because "I can't pedal the bike for you and expect you to learn how to ride it." She also explains why she praises effort over achievement and how parents can help kids face scary news: ask questions first, don't over-explain, and model calm.

Resources mentioned:

Boat Baby by Vicky Nguyen
The AI documentary Vicky recommends, called "How I Became an Apocaloptimist"

. . . . . .

Order our new book, Capable, here!!

See our speaking dates, purchase books and check out our courses here.. . . . . .

If you would like to partner with Raising Boys and Girls as a podcast sponsor, fill out our⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Advertise With Us⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ form.

BOLL & BRANCH: Get 15% off plus free shipping on your first set of sheets at Bollandbranch.com/rbg⁠. Exclusions apply.

QUINCE: Go to ⁠Quince.com/rbg⁠ for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns.

AG1: Go to DrinkAG.com/RBG and get a free Immune Support Bundle, including a bottle of Omega-3 fish oil and a bottle of Vitamin D3K2, with your first subscription order of AG1 Next Gen or AG1 Pro.

CHRISTIAN HEALTHSHARE MINISTRIES: Take charge of your healthcare by visiting chministries.org/solution.

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Episode 418: Growing Perseverance in Capable Kids with David and Sissy Oct 13, 2026

Show notes

In this episode, Sissy and David explore how kids build perseverance by sticking with hard things, and how parents can stay close without stepping in to rescue them. David tells the story of a freshman cross-country runner who finished her first meet long after everyone else, cheered in by teammates who ran back onto the course for her. They share practical ideas: let kids be beginners, look for small everyday chances to keep going, and ask whether it's your child or you who needs relief. They close with Romans 5 and a challenge to tell your kids one of your own unpolished perseverance stories this week.

Resources mentioned:

Capable by Sissy Goff and David Thomas
Episode 187: Parenting and Grandparenting with Love and Laughter with Anne Lamott
Research on Person versus process praise and criticism: implications for contingent self-worth and coping by Carol Dweck
Research on How Adults' Actions, Outcomes, and Testimony Affect Preschoolers' Persistence

. . . . . .

Order our new book, Capable, here!!

See our speaking dates, purchase books and check out our courses here.. . . . . .

If you would like to partner with Raising Boys and Girls as a podcast sponsor, fill out our⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Advertise With Us⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ form.

BOLL & BRANCH: Get 15% off plus free shipping on your first set of sheets at Bollandbranch.com/rbg⁠. Exclusions apply.

QUINCE: Go to ⁠Quince.com/rbg⁠ for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns.

AG1: Go to DrinkAG.com/RBG and get a free Immune Support Bundle, including a bottle of Omega-3 fish oil and a bottle of Vitamin D3K2, with your first subscription order of AG1 Next Gen or AG1 Pro.

CHRISTIAN HEALTHSHARE MINISTRIES: Take charge of your healthcare by visiting chministries.org/solution.

HIYA: Visit hiyahealth.com/rbg for 50% off your first order.OUR PLACE: Visit fromourplace.com/rbg and use code RBG for 10% off sitewide,

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Episode 417: Helping Families with Disabilities Experience Their Capability with Amy Juila Becker Oct 08, 2026

Show notes

Amy Julia Becker explains why measuring kids against developmental milestones makes children with disabilities look incapable, and why asking "what's the next small step toward growth?" shows how capable they really are. She describes letting love "wrap around" fear and helping kids feel wanted, valued, and needed. She also shares how person-centered goal-setting turned 12-year-old Penny's dream of living with friends in Chicago into "Mondays, Penny does her own laundry." Her advice for overwhelmed parents is to pick one overwhelming thing, ask "who could help me?", and take one small step toward that person.

Resources mentioned:

Capable by Sissy Goff and David Thomas
Amy Julia Becker's books: To Be Made Well, White Picket Fences, Small Talk, A Good and Perfect Gift
Amy Julia's podcasts: Take the Next Step with Amy Julia Becker and Reimagining the Good Life
Take the Next Step: When Grief Has No Words: Helping Kids With Disabilities Process Loss • Sissy Goff, LPC-MHSP
Raising Boys and Girls Episode 226: Reimagining Family Life with Disability with Amy Julia Becker
Hope Heals
Disability Ministry Network
Alliance for Disability Justice and Ethics in Reproductive Genetics

. . . . . .

Order our new book, Capable, here!!

See our speaking dates, purchase books and check out our courses here.. . . . . .

If you would like to partner with Raising Boys and Girls as a podcast sponsor, fill out our⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Advertise With Us⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ form.

BOLL & BRANCH: Get 15% off plus free shipping on your first set of sheets at Bollandbranch.com/rbg⁠. Exclusions apply.

QUINCE: Go to ⁠Quince.com/rbg⁠ for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns.

AG1: Go to DrinkAG.com/RBG and get a free Immune Support Bundle, including a bottle of Omega-3 fish oil and a bottle of Vitamin D3K2, with your first subscription order of AG1 Next Gen or AG1 Pro.

CHRISTIAN HEALTHSHARE MINISTRIES: Take charge of your healthcare by visiting chministries.org/solution.THE ABSORPTION COMPANY: Visit absorbmore.com and use code RBG for up to 35% off your first order.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Episode 416: Growing Flexibility in Capable Kids with David and Sissy Oct 06, 2026

Show notes

Sissy and David open with a "How Flexible Are You Really?" quiz and explain that flexibility is what happens after disappointment. They say they've never seen kids, or parents, struggle with it this much, and they connect rigidity to anxiety's need for certainty and to the "control monster." They share four ways to build flexibility: name it, make it fun with low-stakes practice like a flexibility jar or a family points challenge, reward the practice, and model it yourself. They close with the idea that being capable means trusting yourself to find plan B.

Order our new book, Capable, here!!

See our speaking dates, purchase books and check out our courses here.. . . . . .

If you would like to partner with Raising Boys and Girls as a podcast sponsor, fill out our⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Advertise With Us⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ form.

BOLL & BRANCH: Get 15% off plus free shipping on your first set of sheets at Bollandbranch.com/rbg⁠. Exclusions apply.

QUINCE: Go to ⁠Quince.com/rbg⁠ for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns.

AG1: Go to DrinkAG.com/RBG and get a free Immune Support Bundle, including a bottle of Omega-3 fish oil and a bottle of Vitamin D3K2, with your first subscription order of AG1 Next Gen or AG1 Pro.

CHRISTIAN HEALTHSHARE MINISTRIES: Take charge of your healthcare by visiting chministries.org/solution.

COMPASSION INTERNATIONAL: See where your one yes could lead. Visit compassion.com/rbg today!

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Episode 415: Raising Conscious Sons and Daughters with Dr. Shefali Oct 01, 2026

Show notes

Dr. Shefali Tsabary, author of Raising Conscious Daughters and Raising Conscious Sons, explains how technology targets boys through their drive for achievement and girls through their need for approval. She describes girls struggling with perfectionism beneath polished exteriors, and boys caught between a culture that treats masculinity as a bad word and a manosphere that turns it into a cartoon. Instead of starting with a digital detox, she urges parents to build "havens" of connection: small shared tasks, side-by-side movement with boys, and seeing girls as their ordinary selves. She closes by reminding girls that they don't have to fit in to belong, because "sovereignty is her liberation."

Resources mentioned:

Raising Conscious Daughters by Dr. Shefali Tsabary
Raising Conscious Sons by Dr. Shefali Tsabary
Dr. Shefali's website
Dr. Shefali's Instagram
Dr. Shefali's courses and her five-month conscious parenting coaching institute

. . . . . .

Order our new book, Capable, here!!

See our speaking dates, purchase books and check out our courses here.. . . . . .

If you would like to partner with Raising Boys and Girls as a podcast sponsor, fill out our⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Advertise With Us⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ form.

BOLL & BRANCH: Get 15% off plus free shipping on your first set of sheets at Bollandbranch.com/rbg⁠. Exclusions apply.

QUINCE: Go to ⁠Quince.com/rbg⁠ for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns.

HEY POLO: Protect your loved ones without spying on them. Go to heypolo.com/raising or use code RAISING and get 70% off your first year!

AG1: Go to DrinkAG.com/RBG and get a free Immune Support Bundle, including a bottle of Omega-3 fish oil and a bottle of Vitamin D3K2, with your first subscription order of AG1 Next Gen or AG1 Pro.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Episode 414: Growing Competence In Capable Kids with David and Sissy Sep 29, 2026

Show notes

Kicking off a new stretch of their Capable series, Sissy Goff and David Thomas explore the strength of competence, distinguishing it from confidence: confidence says "I think I can," competence says "I've done hard things before," and it's built by practicing through real, manageable struggles rather than being rescued from them. They introduce "the capable pause" — asking whether a situation is truly unsafe or just uncomfortable before stepping in illustrated by David's story of coaching his daughter Lily through a recurring conflict with a classmate instead of solving it for her. The episode closes with a challenge to notice one moment this week where you're tempted to intervene, pause, and ask your child, "What do you think you could try?"

Resources mentioned:

Capable by David Thomas and Sissy Goff
I Guess I Haven't Learned That Yet by Shauna Niequist
Romans 5, Romans 8, and John 16 — scripture passages on struggle, perseverance, and character.

. . . . . .

Order our new book, Capable, here!!

See our speaking dates, purchase books and check out our courses here.. . . . . .

If you would like to partner with Raising Boys and Girls as a podcast sponsor, fill out our⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Advertise With Us⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ form.

CHRISTIAN HEALTHSHARE MINISTRIES: Take charge of your healthcare by visiting chministries.org/solution.

BOLL & BRANCH: Get 15% off plus free shipping on your first set of sheets at Bollandbranch.com/rbg⁠. Exclusions apply.

QUINCE: Go to ⁠Quince.com/rbg⁠ for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns.

SEEDS: Download the free SEEDS app and take one small step today. Plant your first seed and see what God can grow.

HEY POLO: Protect your loved ones without spying on them. Go to heypolo.com/raising or use code RAISING and get 70% off your first year!

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Episode 413: A Practical Way of Creating Your Family Legacy with Blake Brewer Sep 24, 2026

Show notes

Blake Brewer joins Sissy and David to tell the story of watching his father drown in Hawaii when he was 19, and how a letter his dad had written him, discovered in his briefcase hours later, anchored him through grief and inspired the Legacy Letter Challenge. He shares what helped him grieve well, from adults who gave him space rather than pressure to still letting himself cry decades later, and reflects on the ripple effects of his dad's words now that he's a husband and father. He outlines the letter-writing process he teaches (apology, love, wisdom, memories) and how it's grown into corporate team-building work with companies like Walmart. He closes by urging listeners not to leave things unsaid, noting that 1 in 11 kids lose a parent or sibling by age 18.

Resources mentioned:

Here’s a link to sign up for a free 90-minute guided Legacy Letter Experience with Blake Brewer.

Legacy Letter Challenge / legacyletter.com — Blake's organization and website, with free resources, a starter kit, and live 90-minute sessions on writing a legacy letter.
Helping Kids Through Grief by Sissy Goff

. . . . . .

Order our new book, Capable, here!!

See our speaking dates, purchase books and check out our courses here.. . . . . .

If you would like to partner with Raising Boys and Girls as a podcast sponsor, fill out our⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Advertise With Us⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ form.

CHRISTIAN HEALTHSHARE MINISTRIES: Take charge of your healthcare by visiting chministries.org/solution.

BOLL & BRANCH: Get 15% off plus free shipping on your first set of sheets at Bollandbranch.com/rbg⁠. Exclusions apply.

QUINCE: Go to ⁠Quince.com/rbg⁠ for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns.

SEEDS: Download the free SEEDS app and take one small step today. Plant your first seed and see what God can grow.

HEY POLO: Protect your loved ones without spying on them. Go to heypolo.com/raising or use code RAISING and get 70% off your first year!

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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