Parent Driven Development

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**Parent Driven Development**

Turns out children arrive with no manual. There’s no coherent online tutorial. Between staying up to date with emerging technologies and balancing work and home life in an industry that often requires un-timeable bug fixes, on call schedules, and more, working parents are balancing a lot. Parents are also exploring additional technical issues like “screen time” or internet privacy, coming at these issues from a different perspective as technologists ourselves. We cover all of these topics and more using a panel of parents coming from diverse perspectives and a variety of technological backgrounds. We’ll shine light onto these issues and provide a valuable food for thought for these folks. Want to ask a question that the panelists can discuss in an episode? Email us at panel@parentdrivendevelopment.com. And if you’re loving the podcast and want to support us, please visit our Patreon (https://www.patreon.com/parentdrivendev)!

Latest Episodes:

067: Goodbye, for now Mar 31, 2021

Show notes

Parent Driven Development

Episode 067: Goodbye, for now.

1:00 Parent Driven Development reflects on what it’s like being a panelist on the podcast

Imposter syndrome
Multiple purposes to be an effective parent
Expanding perspectives, ideas, and parenting techniques
Ability to relate with one another

8:40 What we hope to our listeners take away from the podcast

There is no one way to parent
You’ll continue to grow as a parent
You are not alone - every parent, kid, family, circumstances are different

13:30 What would we have done differently?

Earlier sponsorship
Episode format

16:15 Parting words for listeners

Thank you!!
You’re doing a great job.

17:17 Final genius and fail moments

Chris Sexton’s daughter uses the word arithmetic with her peers, but no one knows the word leading her to question whether her parents played a prank on her.
Allison calms down her family with deep breathing after her daughter has a potty accident.
KWu’s 3-year-old son feels super proud after helping shovel the snow, and he helped!
Chris Arcand finds the perfect snow sled for his son to be towed around in the deep Minnesota snow.

How can I support the podcast?

Please follow us @parentdrivendev on Twitter or email us at panel@parentdrivendevelopment.com.

Our website is at ParentDrivenDevelopment.com.

Chris Arcand
Chris Sexton
KWu
Allison

066: Finding a new job during the pandemic Mar 17, 2021

Show notes

Parent Driven Development

66: Finding a new job during the pandemic.

Welcome, Jean Hsu!

Jean Hsu is a writer, coach, and software engineer turned leadership coach after working for a decade in Silicon Valley. She is the VP of engineering at Range Labs and Co-founder of Co Leadership, which focuses on filling the gaps in leadership development in the tech industry. Jean doesn’t miss writing code, but she does miss deleting it.

0:53 Finding a new job during the pandemic

Desire strikes for leadership
The hiring process

5:20 How did the pandemic change your thought process

Intentionality of specific desires - management, leadership, flexibility
Enjoying the journey rather than letting comparison or stress take over

7:30 What would Jean do differently now?

Finding ways to lean into async communication with a remote team in different time zones, while keeping the team engaged and connected with each other
Hybrid mix of in-person and remote is the future for companies

13:13 Pre-pandemic commute tales

Feels like a different lifetime

15:40 New expectations for Range during the pandemic

Getting rid of the 9-5; windowed work with colored labels
Core hours for team meetings
Setting boundaries

19:40 Genius and fail moments

KWu closed her son’s fingers between a door hinge… #fail
Allison’s daughter turns 3 and shines at her yearly doctor's appointment. #genius
Jean downloaded TikTok and discovered the best parenting hack to tell your kids to do a task, rather than ask. #genius
Chris brings back his daughter's love of Star Wars. #genius

How can I support the podcast?

Please follow us @parentdrivendev on Twitter or email us at panel@parentdrivendevelopment.com.

Our website is at ParentDrivenDevelopment.com.

Allison
KWu
Chris Sexton

Special Guest: Jean Hsu.

065: Teaching Programming to Kids Mar 03, 2021

Show notes

Parent Driven Development

Episode 065: Teaching Programming to Kids with Felienne

Welcome, Felienne!

Felienne is the creator of the Hedy programming language, and was one of the founders of the Joy of Coding conference. Since 2016, she has been a host at SE radio, one of the most popular software engineering podcasts on the web. Felienne is the author of “The Programmer’s Brain” a book that helps programmers understand how their brains work and how to use it more effectively. In 2021, Felienne was awarded the Dutch Prize for ICT research.

0:50 How does Felienne become interested in programming education?

Research field towards programming education
Love of kids

3:33 Methods and strategies to help kids understand

Relevant for professionals
Full concentration disables full memory, so she lowers the cognitive load
After time, memory starts to build and functioning increases

6:02 Maximizing different learning styles in kids

Learn their preferences
Challenges their default learning style

9:57 Felienne’s new book

How people learn programming
The more information you know about your brain can help you understand how you learn

11:40 Interesting findings

Cognitive load

14:00 Top tips related to programming

Refactoring for personal comprehension
Let go of one golden standard that code is suppose to look like

17:29 Specific differences between professionals and kids

Motivation
Concrete vs open ended expression

20:50 - 1 take away

Take the kids hands, and guide them

22:20

Allison and her husband score a few days each solo as they transition back into their home #genius
Felienne’s students fuss over the different symbols of division in coding #fail

How can I support the podcast?

Please follow us @parentdrivendev on Twitter or email us at panel@parentdrivendevelopment.com.

Our website is at ParentDrivenDevelopment.com.

Allison

Special Guest: Felienne Hermans.

064: Moving and Renovating Feb 17, 2021

Show notes

Parent Driven Development

Episode 064: Moving and Renovating

0:30 Moving and renting realities

KWu moves
Allison’s home renovations
Preparation before the kids

4:30 Toys

Ethical parenting of getting rid of toys
Hiding and cleaning out old toys from the kids (out of sight out of mind)

10:05 Establishing new house rules

Setting realistic expectations on new floors, new rooms, new finishes
Furniture socks
Furniture caster cups
Respect and Take Care of Things
Learning to get along book series

18:35 Caution police in new house

Acceptance is key
Roommates with no impulse control.. your kids. ;)

22:40 Genius and fail moments

KWu’s kids got into some old and slimy carrots meant for the compost.. But at least they’re eating vegetables!
Allison’s son gets shut down from her parenting synchronicity with her husband.

How can I support the podcast?

Please follow us @parentdrivendev on Twitter or email us at panel@parentdrivendevelopment.com.

Our website is at ParentDrivenDevelopment.com.

KWu
Allison

063: Fear in Parenting Feb 03, 2021

Show notes

Parent Driven Development

Episode 063: Fear in Parenting

0:40 Fear and stress of parenting

From independent… to having dependents
Trends of becoming more conservative once a parent

2:50 Decision making process

High alert, more burden than non-parents
Different decisions and problems at different stages of the kids
Background buzz of constant anxiety

6:40 Different stresses

Physical dangers for smaller kids, choking hazards
Trying to avoid helicopter parenting
Screen interest, programming, and patience

10:55 Big anxieties

Screen time !! Constant worry and stress for modern parents with kids
Augmenting reality through screens - stress for middle school aged parents
How to foster new sibling relationships

Siblings Without Rivalry - book

How to avoid middle child syndrome with three kids, carve out alone time with each child
Feeling guilty to tell kids to play by themselves.. But it’s also important to learn

21:35 Genius and fail moments from the last week

KWu moves to a new house and her son is waking every night from terrors or feeling too cold as she’s been keeping the thermostat down real low. #fail
Jess’s son is a pretty adventurous eater and recently discovered balsamic vinegar which is now a new favorite! #genius
Chris makes biscuits and conjures a family night which turned into a great family time. #genius

How can I support the podcast?

Please follow us @parentdrivendev on Twitter or email us at panel@parentdrivendevelopment.com.

Our website is at ParentDrivenDevelopment.com.

Jess
Chris S
KWu

062: 3-Year Anniversary - Episode Highlights Jan 20, 2021

Show notes

Parent Driven Development

062: Celebrating Our Favorite Episodes from the past 3 Years!

Episode Highlights

KWu, Chris, Josh, and Allison reflect on the past 3-years of podcasting. They touch on their favorite episodes and guests over the years, as well as some favorite parenting genius and fail moments!

1:30 Episode 43 - Managing parents on your team with Nick Means

3:10 Episode 19 - Being Adults, Live from Ruby Conf with Jonan Scheffler

7:25 Episode 11 - Being a Trans-Parent with Jess Szmajda

10:35 Episode 26 - Breastfeeding with Allison, Mandy, and KWu

13:06 Episode 13 - Babies at Work Program with Leah Silber

14:38 Episode 39 - Parenting Roles and Gender Equity with Richard Schneeman

15:50 Episode 34 - Extracurricular Activities with Barrett Clark

18:18 Episode 20 - Fertility Struggles with Adam Cuppy

19:55 Josh's rememberable genuis and fail moments

22:40 Genius / fails

Allison questions herself as a parent due to a Hanukkah gift gone wrong
Josh bans Elf on Shelf and his daughter starts to question Santa Claus
Chris nails the Christmas lights on his son’s bed.. But then begins to question everything when he begins to struggle getting his son out of the car to go to school.
KWu and her son enjoy a fresh snowfall!

How can I support the podcast?

Please follow us @parentdrivendev on Twitter or email us at panel@parentdrivendevelopment.com.

Our website is at ParentDrivenDevelopment.com.

KWu
Josh
Allison
Chris S

061: DHH - Internet Famous with Kids Jan 06, 2021

Show notes

Ep 61 : DHH on being Internet Famous with Kids

1:48 Welcome, DHH

David is the creator of Ruby on Rails, cofounder & CTO at Basecamp, best-selling author, Le Mans class-winning racing driver, frequent podcast guest, and family man.

2:50 Security concerns

Social Media
COVID times
Parenting boundaries

13:45 Privacy

Picture surplus
Authenticity

16:45 Engagement with parenting on the web

The highlight parenting reel
Avoid the humble brag as a parent
Internet jousts

DHH recommended books:

The Myth of the Spoiled Child - Alfie Kohn
Punished by Rewards - Alfie Kohn * The Self-Driven Child - Ned Johnson

26:30 Introducing privileges to his kids

Capitalism
Against artificial constraints placed on by parents
A life not centered around materialism

The Road To Wigan Pier - George Orwell

38:38 Genius / Fails

Arit makes a crib boundary with a creative new upcycle
KWu wrestles with a photo book for her kids
Chris fails on fail this week
DHH is off by an hour as his kids come home right as this podcast starts
Allison’s daughter challenges her patience during bed time

How can I support the podcast?

Please follow us @parentdrivendev on Twitter or email us at panel@parentdrivendevelopment.com.

Our website is at ParentDrivenDevelopment.com.

Allison
Chris S
Arit
KWu

Special Guest: David Heinemeier Hansson .

Facebook Rabbit Holes for Parents + Kid Toys

Subculture for wooden toys
The Nugget couch
Parents become hyper focused on specific products
Careful what your Google
How to choose your Facebook groups
The Social Dilemma
Social media groups are "bad"/addicting, but also useful..
Geo-fencing - creating fairer ways for international purchases
The lottery
Lucie's List
Pandemic toys for the New Year
More pressure for parents
Moms targeted mostly in the Facebook Groups
Marketing kids toys with trigger language: “Investment piece”

Parents: You are doing a GREAT job.

Genius / Fails

KWu tries to rotate out toys and clothes for her son, but things aren’t going well.
Allison smoothly close out virtual Ruby conf while managing multiple interruptions from her kids

How can I support the podcast?

Please follow us @parentdrivendev on Twitter or email us at panel@parentdrivendevelopment.com.

Our website is at ParentDrivenDevelopment.com.

KWu
Allison

059: Hiring and Interviewing Dec 09, 2020

Show notes

Parent Driven Development

059: Hiring and Interviewing

Jess, Chris S, and Allison discuss the hiring and interviewing process in tech. They share their experience as the interviewee, as well as the interviewer. The team identifies the underlying bias in the process, good signs and bad signs, and why it's important to set up a potential interviewee in the best environment possible.

01:45 Hiring and Interviewing in tech

Jess writes a book and gets a new job
How to reduce bias in interviewing process

03:33 Tech interviews hinder parents and caregivers

Take-home vs pairing session
Hiring managers should set up the interviewee in the best possible scenario
6-8 hours for a take-home test, unrealistic for caregivings

09:50 How to access talent

Everyway is flawed
Take-home - kids constantly interrupting
Paired - many engineers are introverted
Solutions: Short at-home mixed with pairing, or problem prompt

13:30 Bias

How to reduce: rubric for every round, being aware of the bias
Allison asks about parental leave, and feels the tone shift drastically
Legal protection, but a lot of fuzzy areas

16:45 Good signs for parents interviewing

Its a non-event when a child pops into the room while on a call
Companies reward evenly
Talk with team members outside the interviewing committee
Talk with someone you relate to on the team, mom, trans, BIPOC, etc

20:30 Bad signs for parents interviewing

The entire tone changes after asking about parental leave..
Judgmental, leadership team of non-parents

22:00 Handing flexibility

Ask about parental leave, primary and secondary leave
Be honest with needs
Workplace flexibility

28:37 Genius / fail

Jess deals with her son having accidents constantly
Chris and his kids play board games and jam out to all songs names satellite
Allison’s daughter sparks chaos when she leaves her room after bedtime… but soon learns to stay in her room to tire herself out.

How can I support the podcast?

Please follow us @parentdrivendev on Twitter or email us at panel@parentdrivendevelopment.com.

Our website is at ParentDrivenDevelopment.com.

Jess
Allison
Chris S

Episode 058: Co-parenting with Brandon Hays

Welcome Brandon!

Brandon Hays is a dad and engineering leader based in Austin, TX. His professional mission is to help the tech industry improve by organizing people to accomplish things together in environments that recognize and support their "human-ness". His personal mission is to survive parenthood until the kids are in college.

02:40 Brandon's co-parenting

Starting with traditional gender roles
Co-parenting was a foriegn concept until remote work..
The invisible work becomes more visible
Covid has forced parents to confront the amount of work it takes to raise kids

06:30 Co-parenting during the pandemic

Awareness that things changed… kids cannot return to school
Brandon becomes the educator during the pandemic
The amount of work to parent became too high when everything shut down
Reworking the home dynamic when one partner needs help
Asking for flexibility in places where he had previous thought was not available before

10:53 Working out responsibility between partners

Clear contracts
Splitting up tasks and making them known to each partner
Alternating cooking dinner and clean up
Family clean day
Creating activities for kids, even after a long day
Check in with your partner, how are you feeling burden?

14:05 Recognize your partner's strengths

Being comfortable with how each partner co-parents
Recognition of each partner
Optimize each parenting style and continue to check in
Asking and taking the self-care when it is needed

17:30 Working together

19:10 How has Covid refocused things?!

Strengthened the team mentality
Hard to sustain the intensity of the pandemic
Constant change, the on-call parent

24:40 Prioritization - Do our actions line up with our values?

27:00 Take away: preserve time for planning and reflection

28:35 Genius / fail moments

Allison checks in while her son is in virtual school and feels major mom guilt…
Chris’s family visits and brings his camper for a huge win!
Arit slyly phases out her daughters stuffed animal #genius
Jess’s son goes full into minecraft, but it may be too much.. #possiblegenius
KWu repurposed geotags for wooden toys for her kids #genius
Brandon get creative taking pictures of his kids in their natural habitat

How can I support the podcast?

Please follow us @parentdrivendev on Twitter or email us at panel@parentdrivendevelopment.com.

Our website is at ParentDrivenDevelopment.com.

Chris Arcand
Jess
Arit
Allison
KWu

Special Guest: Brandon Hays.

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Episode 067: Goodbye, for now.

1:00 Parent Driven Development reflects on what it’s like being a panelist on the podcast

8:40 What we hope to our listeners take away from the podcast

13:30 What would we have done differently?

16:15 Parting words for listeners

17:17 Final genius and fail moments

How can I support the podcast?

66: Finding a new job during the pandemic.

Welcome, Jean Hsu!

0:53 Finding a new job during the pandemic

5:20 How did the pandemic change your thought process

7:30 What would Jean do differently now?

13:13 Pre-pandemic commute tales

15:40 New expectations for Range during the pandemic

19:40 Genius and fail moments

How can I support the podcast?

Episode 065: Teaching Programming to Kids with Felienne

Welcome, Felienne!

0:50 How does Felienne become interested in programming education?

3:33 Methods and strategies to help kids understand

6:02 Maximizing different learning styles in kids

9:57 Felienne’s new book

11:40 Interesting findings

14:00 Top tips related to programming

17:29 Specific differences between professionals and kids

20:50 - 1 take away

22:20

How can I support the podcast?

Episode 064: Moving and Renovating

0:30 Moving and renting realities

4:30 Toys

10:05 Establishing new house rules

18:35 Caution police in new house

22:40 Genius and fail moments

How can I support the podcast?

Episode 063: Fear in Parenting

0:40 Fear and stress of parenting

2:50 Decision making process

6:40 Different stresses

10:55 Big anxieties

Siblings Without Rivalry - book

21:35 Genius and fail moments from the last week

How can I support the podcast?

062: Celebrating Our Favorite Episodes from the past 3 Years!

Episode Highlights

1:30 Episode 43 - Managing parents on your team with Nick Means

3:10 Episode 19 - Being Adults, Live from Ruby Conf with Jonan Scheffler

7:25 Episode 11 - Being a Trans-Parent with Jess Szmajda

10:35 Episode 26 - Breastfeeding with Allison, Mandy, and KWu

13:06 Episode 13 - Babies at Work Program with Leah Silber

14:38 Episode 39 - Parenting Roles and Gender Equity with Richard Schneeman

15:50 Episode 34 - Extracurricular Activities with Barrett Clark

18:18 Episode 20 - Fertility Struggles with Adam Cuppy

19:55 Josh's rememberable genuis and fail moments

22:40 Genius / fails

How can I support the podcast?

1:48 Welcome, DHH

2:50 Security concerns

13:45 Privacy

16:45 Engagement with parenting on the web

DHH recommended books:

26:30 Introducing privileges to his kids

38:38 Genius / Fails

How can I support the podcast?

Facebook Rabbit Holes for Parents + Kid Toys

Parents: You are doing a GREAT job.

Genius / Fails

How can I support the podcast?

059: Hiring and Interviewing

01:45 Hiring and Interviewing in tech

03:33 Tech interviews hinder parents and caregivers

09:50 How to access talent

13:30 Bias

16:45 Good signs for parents interviewing

20:30 Bad signs for parents interviewing

22:00 Handing flexibility