Ordinary People. Ordinary Things. with Melissa Radke

Latest Episodes:

Beautifully Broken Journey with Amy Reinecke Jul 31, 2018

Show notes

This episode gets real. If you have my book Eat Cake. Be Brave. Then you know that weight has been an issue all of my life. One of my earliest memories was getting out of bed and finding my mom eating frosting and watching Johnny Carson. I've tried different diets, and I know it is about the journey, letting God guide me, and having a conversation with my heart.

This is why I'm so excited about today's guest. Amy Reinecke is someone who I discovered on Instagram and her website Beautifully Broken Journey resonated with me. Amy talks about her story, her struggle with weight, food, and dieting. We talk about how it is about the journey, loving your body, and trusting in God to guide you. This is a complex topic that is a lifelong journey. Hopefully, we can all inspire each other to take this journey in a gracious and loving way.

You can find Amy Reinecke here:

Beautifully Broken Journey Amy on Facebook Amy on Instagram

Show Notes

[00:55] My earliest memory is crawling out of bed and finding my mom watching Johnny Carson and eating frosting.
[01:31] This is when eating in secret became fun, but honestly it isn't a whole lot of fun anymore.
[01:42] Everybody seems to have an opinion about my weight and my size.
[02:39] I want more. I want better. I want to do everything I need to do and get dressed up and feel good about myself. I want to lose weight.
[03:21] My guest today is someone who I've been following on Instagram for a while. I am a crazy huge fan of this woman.
[03:53] Amy Reinecke is my guest today.
[05:07] Amy's journey also started when she was a little girl. She has struggled with weight and body image.
[06:04] Amy spent a lot of time chasing the number on the scale. She felt like she didn't add up in quite a few different ways.
[06:49] She went on her first diet when she was in the fourth grade.
[07:15] Amy shares why her website is called Beautifully Broken Journey.
[08:08] Beautifully broken jumped out at Melissa. She saw her reflection in that title.
[10:41] By the end of the show, we should all love ourselves enough to try to do better for our bodies.
[13:07] Amy and Melissa both sing. Melissa even moved to Nashville to pursue her dream of singing.
[13:20] Melissa was paid really well to be a session singer. She stood at the back and let everyone else take center stage, because she didn't look the part.
[14:52] Amy and her husband had been through a difficult time and her weight and body image was a contributing factor. She would diet and then gain the weight back.
[15:23] She had lost weight and was unhappy living a life of restriction, until she discovered binge eating disorder.
[16:33] Binge eating disorder when you hide your food choices is a real thing.
[17:09] Amy began therapy and gained 100 pounds. Her diet had been so restrictive, and she started eating whatever she wanted. She was actually on 3 medications and one of them caused extreme hunger.
[18:35] She had to learn and relearn her hunger cues.
[21:27] How restrictive diets can really backfire in the long run.
[22:39] Why food was such an emotional issue for Amy. She struggled for years and realize she couldn't fight the battle on her own anymore. She opened up her heart and asked for help.
[23:14] She knows it's more than just calories in and calories out. Are you broken inside? Are you taking your life, because you're not enjoying your food?
[24:23] Amy has finally realized that her journey is forever.
[24:52] Amy feels better when she takes care of her body. She's a better wife, mother, and friend. She is also lost 104 pounds in the last two years.
[25:37] God created us to run on full capacity with the physical, emotional, and spiritual.
[25:51] Melissa is kicking butt emotionally and spiritually. But we are only as strong as our weakest link.
[27:37] We are more than the number on the scale. Amy loves the body kindness movement.
[30:20] Amy went back to Weight Watchers but was determined to do it in a healthy way.
[31:48] Amy chose Weight Watchers because it was the only program that had worked for her. Restriction in any form is not healthy for her.
[32:48] She needed to honor her body in a lifelong way.
[33:53] Being a mom is the one area that Amy had the utmost confidence in.
[34:12] God had taught Amy to trust in Him in that season.
[35:12] Amy's back surgery was a gift of God's grace. In a way it was saying let's just start over.
[36:13] It's not about a number. It's about having a body that can move and a body that you can appreciate.
[37:43] Amy felt that God told her to stop drinking Diet Coke.
[39:07] Melissa finds that when God is leading her, she is more in tune with his voice.
[39:55] He is also the God of the small moments.
[41:06] Amy is being pushed in a direction that will probably give her more freedom than she has ever had in her life.
[43:23] It's not about the weight, it is about the journey and the reliance on a creator that is greater than you.
[45:03] What Amy is doing means so much to Melissa.
[45:41] It was a true blessing for Amy to share her story.
[46:46] The lightning round…
[49:20] This was a tough topic for me. It's time to have a conversation with my heart.

Thanks for joining us on Ordinary People Ordinary Things. Be sure to subscribe to our podcast on iTunes and leave a nice review. Just like your mother taught you.

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Road Trippin' Jul 24, 2018

Show notes

We are on the book tour. Today, we are broadcasting from the road as we hit San Antonio and try to find a nice lunch spot. So far, we have been to Houston, Dallas, and New York. For this episode, we have decided to record each time we are in the car. So, we are taking you on the road with us. If you ever wanted to be in the car with David and Melissa, this is your chance.

We talk about how nice Megan was and that there was a big announcement at the end of the segment. We discuss bringing and not bringing our kids on the road trip. We talk about having a meet and greet with Melissa's social squad of sisters, some favorite and not so favorite comments about the book, feeling tired and emotional after the book signing, and more. I hope you enjoy this ride with us.

You can find Melissa here:

Podcast Web Page Facebook Page @MsMelissaRadke on Instagram @msmelissaradke on Twitter

Show Notes

[02:33] How we get along great in the car, and sometimes we don't
[03:00] We were exhausted last night when we got to San Antonio. We slept in and woke up just in time for Melissa to be on the Megan Kelly Show.
[03:14] Megan said that David was handsome.
[03:56] The interview with Megan went well.
[04:17] There was also an exclusive announcement.
[04:29] Remi has been getting fan mail and gift cards and even a ring.
[04:52] Rocco is depressed about it, and plans on being on the show.
[06:46] Road Trippin part 2. We are going to the Cheesecake Factory to meet up with my squad of women.
[08:07] We got into a misunderstanding about being on the phone while at a restaurant.
[11:06] We were going to enjoy this trip as a family with the kids, but after three stops we realized the kids would have more fun at their grandparents house.
[12:12] We are heading to a meet and greet with my squad sisters. I spent half my life trying to make it onto the squad, then I started my own squad.
[13:26] I get the most nervous or excited to go meet my squad. This is my VIP meet and greet with my social squad sisters.
[14:18] Melissa's favorite comment people have said about the book is when they say that reading the book just felt like sitting down and having a conversation with her.
[14:49] This is what Melissa wants the most, other than for people's lives to be changed.
[15:11] Melissa's least favorite comment about the book.
[16:54] A funny comment during 30 Days of Facebook Live.
[18:04] We just finished up the book signing. It was tiring, but awesome. Now it is time to find a place to get dinner.
[19:42] Some women were there because they saw Melissa on TV or read an article about her.
[20:24] Why Melissa started crying tonight when a beautiful woman showed up and said she got dressed up for Melissa, because it was like her girlfriend was coming to town.
[24:04] A little inside look into our car conversation. Good, bad or otherwise. Along, with trying to find a playlist.
[26:57] Pulling into Starbucks before Melissa's next interview.
[29:03] The fact that David and I are still married after being on the road for seven days straight.
[29:37] Miracles are all around us.

Thanks for joining us on Ordinary People Ordinary Things. Be sure to subscribe to our podcast on iTunes and leave a nice review. Just like your mother taught you.

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Book Birthday Jul 17, 2018

Show notes

This show is going to be a bit different. It is my book birthday. It is launch day of my book Eat Cake. Be Brave. Imagine that you have been keeping a diary since 7th grade, and it was made public. That is kind of how I'm feeling. I'm sharing today, and all of my launch day feelings and emotions with my wonderful husband David and you my wonderful listeners.

You can find Melissa here:

Podcast Web Page Facebook Page @MsMelissaRadke on Instagram @msmelissaradke on Twitter

Show Notes

[02:33] The first time Melissa and David met was on a bus in school. She'll never forget his first words, "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"
[03:48] What does Eat Cake. Be Brave. Actually mean?
[04:11] When Melissa turned 41 she was about to blow out the candles on her birthday cake, and she wished for bravery.
[06:09] She wished to be brave for 12 months. After blowing out her candles, she went back to her room and began to journal what bravery meant to her. The rest is history.
[07:01] All we need is a flicker of bravery and going upstream when everyone else is going downstream. Even if it's only for a little bit.
[08:02] Why Melissa is so relatable. When Melissa began discovering her voice she realized that she wrote the same way that she talked. This alone made her voice relatable.
[09:04] It's easy to relate to Melissa's words because she says what we are actually thinking.
[09:38] Melissa is real enough to say you hurt me, and God helped us.
[10:06] Melissa is real enough to say the truth and to admit her shortcomings and failures.
[10:41] The style and genre of the book.
[11:08] The book is a memoir. It's about all the years in Melissa's life that led up to that one year that changed her forever.
[11:32] We have had wonderful reviews. One recurring theme is that the book is an easy read.
[12:03] The most surprising thing for most people is that the book is funny. It's really funny.
[13:18] This book is for women who are tired of standing in the back of the stage and are ready to take center stage in their lives.
[13:53] If you're not a religious person, you will still love and identify with this book.
[15:23] We had an editorial review that said this woman loved the book and didn't feel preached to. We can be like Christ without preaching it.
[15:45] Melissa's writing is kind of like Mindy Kaling, Amy Poehler, or Tina Fey. Those are the three that she hears.
[16:32] The overarching theme that Melissa hopes to communicate with the book.
[18:00] We have got to become more aware of the words that our Creator has said about us.
[19:30] Once we learn the truth about what God has said about us, we can walk in the truth of bravery.
[19:57] What Melissa go back and change the pain that she has experienced?
[20:13] No. If it meant doing it all again, she would do it.
[20:58] Melissa knows what love and healing can do. She would do everything again if it would help one woman to step out of the shadows and live the life she was meant to live.
[21:58] The book is about the entire family including David, Remi, Rocco, and even Melissa's mother, her Granny, Aunt Melba, and some of her girlfriends.
[22:14] When Melissa's mother is talking in the book the font actually changes. And it is written in the style that her mother speaks in.
[24:52] David is curious if there's a scene in The Bodyguard that Melissa would like to act out.
[26:22] If someone is unsure about buying the book, Melissa would encourage them to come see her on the book tour.
[28:20] Melissa wants these people to see someone just like them who decided to fight for one year.
[28:41] You can find out more about the tour here.
[29:51] Follow Melissa on social media. We have a lot of exciting press coming up in the next couple of weeks.
[30:22] Lightning round questions…
[32:15] When the ball is in our hands, what will we do?
[33:07] The book is an easy read that will make people laugh and will make people cry. There was a lot of blood, sweat and tears that went into this book.
[33:22] David is so proud of Melissa.
Thanks for joining us on Ordinary People Ordinary Things. Be sure to subscribe to our podcast on iTunes and leave a nice review. Just like your mother taught you.

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Chicken Fried Women Jul 10, 2018

Show notes

There is a chapter in my book called Chicken Fried Women. This chapter is about the women in my family who I am very close to. I call us chicken fried, because we may be battered on the outside with our scars and our stories, but we are soft and tender on the inside. With, of course, a little spice thrown in. I have four incredible guests today. My Mother Anet, My Grandmother Mary, My Aunt Melba, and my cousin and Melba's daughter Meridith Baxter who was also my guest on episode episode 5 Over My Bread Body.

We talk about how close our family is and the unique relationship we have. We are loud and outspoken. We tease and give each other a hard time. We fight and forgive, and we love each other fiercely. We talk about what it means to be brave, family traditions, and our relationship with god. We share family stories and discuss challenges of forgiveness and reconciliation. I hope you enjoy this glimpse into our lives and the women who have helped make me who I am.

You can find Melissa here:

Podcast Web Page Facebook Page @MsMelissaRadke on Instagram @msmelissaradke on Twitter

Show Notes

[02:03] Anet Lee is Melissa's mother, and she likes it when Melissa calls her Big Mom.
[02:20] Mary is Melissa's grandmother or the matriarch of the family.
[02:34] Melba White is Melissa's aunt and Anet's sister.
[02:44] Meridith is Melissa's cousin and Melba's daughter.
[03:08] Melissa introduced Aunt Melba to podcasts, and she'll never be the same. She loves listening to true crime podcasts.
[03:33] I call us chicken fried women. We may be battered on the outside, but we're tender on the inside. We also have a little spice to us.
[03:56] There are a lot of strong women in our family who all have their own set of stories.
[04:13] It's unanimous. Melissa is the loudest of the bunch.
[04:20] Granny is the quietest, although she has moments of outbursts.
[04:50] Long-standing family traditions. Everything in our family is centered around God. That is a tradition that not a lot of families can say.
[05:31] Everybody gets together at Christmas, but if it falls on a Sunday plan on going to church.
[05:50] One family tradition that we used to have was on Christmas Eve, we would go and bless other families by Christmas caroling.
[06:27] We are an extremely musical family. We chose families in need when we went caroling. We miss this tradition and would like for our kids to have the same tradition.
[06:56] We would also go sing at the nursing home.
[07:40] We see each other so often we make each other sick. We get together on every holiday, and see each other a couple of times a week for extended visits.
[08:13] Melissa's kids love going to Granny's house on Sunday evenings.
[09:19] The story of the Chapstick and why it's a good idea not to use other's people's Chapstick. Especially, Granny's.
[11:22] The panel at the Social Event based on this chapter in the book. Several audience members were crying when they heard this chapter.
[12:12] How it's unusual for people to see families like ours. As women age, they lose their mothers. A lot of people look at our family, and it makes them feel like something is missing.
[12:39] Our family has learned to support each other and not look for support in other areas.
[13:29] As a family, we have learned to work through our issues together.
[15:25] One reason our family may have stayed so close is our relationship with God and our solid marriages.
[16:23] Reconciliation and forgiveness. Melba has struggled with holding grudges. Her husband taught her how to forgive and gave some great examples of forgiveness.
[17:37] Forgiving and forgetting is hard for Anet too.
[18:08] Granny's husband was very good at making things right. When it comes to forgiving, the Lord would help Granny forget about the hurting part.
[18:31] Why is it so important for our family to be close?
[19:05] Our family loves each other and wants the closeness.
[19:33] We are an accountability system for each other whether we want to or not.
[21:07] A story about someone riding their horse in Melba's Dad's yard. He had to pray and let it go in order to live by the word.
[22:35] We either live it or we don't.
[23:00] Forgiveness may not mean reconciliation if the other party doesn't let it go.
[25:21] Reading the book Everybody, Always: Becoming Love in a World Full of Setbacks and Difficult People. Going into a relationship with an agenda is not love.
[26:39] How the word of God is about love.
[28:43] Melba believes that everything should line up by the word of God, and children should be raised by the word of God.
[29:45] The most unique thing about this family is our sense of humor. We also do a lot together.
[32:11] When we all get together, there's about 27 of us in the room. We are loud, and there are a lot of kids. There is also a lot of food that is mostly fried and desserts.
[33:13] Most of us live on the same street, and we all go to the same church.
[35:07] The oddest person in the family…
[36:08] The best cook in the family…
[39:12] The family member that is never on time…
[40:19] Who's the best driver in the family…
[41:18] Melba stays brave by not shirking her responsibilities.
[41:51] Meredith stays brave because she knows her children are watching.
[42:33] Anet stays brave by resilience and facing challenges over and over.
[42:54] Granny stays brave by praying every day.
[43:40] How we are a brave group of women who all love each other.
[44:59] Silent Night - Christmas in July

Thanks for joining us on Ordinary People Ordinary Things. Be sure to subscribe to our podcast on iTunes and leave a nice review. Just like your mother taught you.

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Choose Your Own Tattoo Jul 03, 2018

Show notes

In honor of the Fourth of July, I want to talk about freedom. I'm talking about the kind of freedom that happens to us, by us, and in spite of us. I'm going to talk about the kind of imprisonment that I brought on myself, but first an excerpt from my upcoming book. Eat Cake. Be Brave.

I've been sharing excerpts that pertain to my podcasts. Today's was hard to choose. My book is a memoir of how all the years of my life led up to my 41st year. This year changed me forever. Before this point, I figuratively, spiritually, and mentally spent a lot of time in prison. This excerpt is from the chapter entitled All Inked up and No Place to Go.

You can find Melissa here:

Podcast Web Page Facebook Page @MsMelissaRadke on Instagram @msmelissaradke on Twitter

Show Notes

[02:04] Excerpt from Eat Cake. Be Brave. All Inked Up and No Place to Go...
[06:23] I have a shirt that I sell called Choose Your Own Tattoo. People have no clue what the shirt means until they hear me speak.
[07:05] My prison was in physical it came in words. These words they called me stuck.
[09:05] The white noise that plays in the background of your mind and your thoughts. The words that have been used against you and have stuck.
[10:16] What is the white noise that you hear day in and day out?
[10:58] White noise becomes a protective barrier between sleep and what is going on.
[11:21] What plays over and over in your thought life becomes a barrier from what is really going on.
[11:31] What if what lied on the other side of the barrier was freedom?
[12:22] It took a long time to get so tatted up, it's going to take a long time to fix the issue.
[12:45] It will take a long time to undo those thought processes, but it can be done. I am living proof of that.
[12:57] The first thing I did was open up my computer and type out everything that God had said about me.
[13:13] I printed 10 copies and pasted them around my house.
[13:52] If you have a tattoo that is the opposite of what God has said about you or your situation, one of those things is untrue. Guess which one?
[14:50] The devil isn't doing this to you. You are doing it to yourself.
[15:22] God is available to you in books, podcasts, and copies printed out at your desk.
[15:42] Freedom isn't free. It takes work and diligence.
[16:23] You are made in God's image, and there will be a time when this reference just comes up.
[17:06] When you hear yourself begin to say these things about how you are a child of God, they will be ingrained in your soul.
[17:20] An excerpt from the Message Bible Second Corinthians 3: 17-18…
[18:42] Aren't you ready to live free and exchange your past?
[19:24] What you are wanting is just within your grasp.The key is right there and you can reach it.
[19:35] Happy Fourth of July. Enjoy your freedom.
[20:52] More from Eat Cake. Be Brave. All Inked Up and No Place to Go...

Thanks for joining us on Ordinary People Ordinary Things. Be sure to subscribe to our podcast on iTunes and leave a nice review. Just like your mother taught you.

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Ugly Lamps and Broken Things Jun 26, 2018

Show notes

My good friend Whitney Lindsey will be here to share her story, but first I'll be reading an excerpt from my new book Eat Cake. Be Brave. This is excerpt is titled The Old Tinkerbell Mermaid Rose Lamp, and I feel that it is especially relevant to the conversation I have with Whitney.

I met Whitney when she was going through an extremely rough time in her life. You might even say she was broken. We can go through a lifetime of throwing away and exchanging broken things, when things can often be fixed. Today, we shed light on what Whitney was going through as a person as she went through this season of her life. Then we talk about who Whitney became and the season of her new life.

You can find Whitney here:

Whitney Lindsey on Facebook

Show Notes

[01:59] Excerpt from Eat Cake. Be Brave. The Old Tinkerbell Mermaid Rose Lamp.
[05:32] The first night that Whitney and Melissa met was at a Bible Study Class that Melissa was leading called Victory Over Darkness.
[06:57] Whitney was a little late to class that night, because she was a single mother of three daughters who she had to take to different places.
[07:16] Whitney came into class with poor posture and a defeated look.
[07:33] Three months prior to the meeting of this group, Whitney discovered that she and her husband weren't compatible anymore. This was the beginning of a long dark painful experience in their marriage.
[09:02] They had days and days of trying to make things better, but it only made things worse. More buried things were brought to life.
[09:42] Whitney's husband left, and it was a brand-new life for her.
[10:05] Whitney was shy and hid in the shadows of her husband during her marriage. Now that her husband was gone, it was time for her to come out of the shadows.
[11:01] Whitney knew it was time for her to make a change in her life, and she signed up for Melissa's Bible study class.
[12:02] Everything loses power when it is brought out into the light.
[14:04] Exchanging broken things that we think can be fixed.
[14:19] We're going to go from the inside out and talk about who Whitney was as a person while she was going through this season.
[14:47] Whitney wanted to overcome where she was and learn a new identity. Was she going to continue in darkness or go down the path of light?
[15:58] You can go to church your entire life and still not understand your identity to Christ.
[16:53] When you know how much God loves you, it changes your worth and what you need from people.
[18:01] Did Whitney become broken in marriage or did she go into the marriage broken? Whitney believes that her brokenness was one of the factors that ended her marriage.
[18:57] You can look whole and yet be fragmented.
[19:29] Marriage is hard.
[19:58] Whitney wanted to fix things because, she didn't want people to know that things were falling apart.
[20:27] There was a huge adjustment. Whitney not only lost her spouse, she lost her home, car, and her friends.
[20:41] Women often lose their self worth when their marriage ends.
[21:24] Whitney decided to start fixing herself. This was the beginning of a new day and a new journey.
[22:34] Whitney made it a priority to spend time with God. God gave her grace and favor the day she decided to turn things around.
[23:37] Whitney is now a product of a restored marriage, but this is more about what was happening to Whitney on the inside.
[23:57] Lovers and Leavers and staying and fixing and working on a marriage.
[24:34] Marriage is hard. Staying and making it work takes strength.
[25:34] Whitney believes that your greatest ministry is in your struggles. She was all in trying to make her marriage work.
[26:47] If God had not restored Whitney, her marriage would not have been restored.
[27:14] Do the hard work yourself and become a self feeder.
[28:08] Whitney's faith brought her husband back. He saw her whole attitude and demeanor change.
[29:38] You can't argue with kindness.
[30:18] Whitney has natural kindness, but she also extended grace towards her husband before the healing process began.
[30:25] She extended the grace to her husband that God had extended to her.
[31:16] Sin is sin. We all mess up. None of us are perfect. If we all extend grace, the world would be a better place.
[32:32] Kids see and feel everything during a divorce.
[34:10] Whitney's daughters got to see Whitney live a life of independent freedom and loving life. They also got to see her parent's marriage restored.
[35:29] Whitney started dating Justin, and they got married again on a Saturday.
[36:50] Her daughters carried a sign that said, "Daddy, here comes Mommy."
[37:08] Whitney's first marriage has been nothing compared to her second marriage. Whitney went from needing her husband to wanting her husband.
[38:12] Without the divorce, Whitney would not be the woman that she is today.
[39:05] It has been a whirlwind of three years, and Whitney is humbled and awed by what God has done.
[39:56] Why are we so quick to want to replace broken things instead of fixing them?
[40:18] There is so much beauty in the brokenness.
[40:50] Living a stained glass life. It's all of those broken pieces that make us who we are. God puts all of these pieces together to create a masterpiece.
[44:12] The lightning round…
[45:49] More from The Old Tinkerbell Mermaid Rose Lamp
[48:09] The fixer is Jesus.

Thanks for joining us on Ordinary People Ordinary Things. Be sure to subscribe to our podcast on iTunes and leave a nice review. Just like your mother taught you.

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When Hope Is Your Name Jun 19, 2018

Show notes

As most of you know, I have a daughter named Remi. This episode is about another Remi, and her amazing family. Crystal Sepulvado is a wife, mother, and nurse practitioner who had her faith shaken to the core when her now nine month old daughter Remi was born eight weeks early with multiple health problems requiring multiple surgeries.

I am excited about this inspiring interview. Another thing I am excited about is that my book Eat Cake. Be Brave. is being released on July 17th. In honor of my book release, I will be reading excerpts from the book that apply to each podcast. This one is especially pertinent. I'm reading When Hope Is Your Name which is a letter I wrote to my daughter Remi.

Crystal is an inspiring woman, wife, and mother. She shares her family's story of Remi being born. She not only shares the multiple challenges she faced, but she shares how hope and faith kept her going. Crystal is a woman of unwavering faith and an inspiration and a help to others.

You can find Melissa here:

Podcast Web Page Facebook Page @MsMelissaRadke on Instagram @msmelissaradke on Twitter

Show Notes

[03:23] When Hope Is Your Name - Book excerpt. Eat Cake. Be Brave.
[06:27] Crystal saw her son at the ball field hanging out with Melissa's daughter Remi.
[08:07] Crystal and her husband Shane were married 10 years ago. They have three children. She was born and raised in the Hudson and Lufkin area.
[09:14] Melissa and Crystal both like the double R names.
[09:52] Crystal's daughter Remi is nine months old, and this is her story.
[10:20] Crystal is a nurse practitioner who works in women's health.
[10:51] Crystal had an ultrasound and discovered that there was fluid around Remi's heart.
[12:22] It was so serious, Crystal saw a specialist on the next Monday.
[13:14] They found out that Remi had a very serious heart defect. She also had fluid building up in her heart.
[14:47] Crystal shares her experience of getting the diagnostic cardiac ultrasounds. The long period in that dark chamber is where her faith started to kick in.
[17:25] Double bubble is narrowing or closure of the intestine. Fluid was building up on Crystal. All of the fluid put Crystal into early labor.
[19:11] She went into delivery eight weeks early, and Remi had a heart defect and a small bowel problem.
[19:37] Crystal had so many fears including the concern of Remi having an incision scar down her chest.
[20:14] She had an emergency C-section. Remi also had a fistula, so she was facing three surgeries.
[22:39] Crystal was still in the hospital, but she had a FaceTime session with the surgeon and in spite of it being life or death, they were able to correct all three things.
[24:11] Shane refused to believe that there would be any other outcome than Remi's surgery coming out perfect.
[25:01] How worship music is lifesaving.
[25:39] Crystal was discharged from the hospital, so that she could go see her baby.
[27:25] Crystal had to go get her son ready for his first day of school. As she was leaving the hospital, Remi coded on the table.
[27:41] They went through several weeks of ups and downs. The holes in Remi's heart were fairly big, and she had a lot of trouble breathing on her own.
[28:18] It was finally time for the dreaded open-heart surgery. As it turned out, this was one of the easier surgeries that they faced.
[29:06] After leaving the hospital, they found out that Remi had softening of the trachea.
[29:28] They faced so many challenges. One thing after another kept happening.
[30:18] Everyday, Crystal was scared to death. It's okay to be vulnerable and feel those things, but you can't stay there.
[31:35] They had to start speaking life over death and now they have their sweet Remi.
[34:31] In situations like this things don't come immediately, and Crystal had to learn patience. She learned patience, and she had to have faith.
[36:33] Crystal knew this wasn't God's fault. She knew if she continued to have faith, that things would turn around for His glory.
[37:11] She stuck to scripture and believing in the lord.
[38:02] How faith helps you to get through to the next day. Crystal also had laminated cards with scripture everywhere.
[38:22] She wrote her testimony and her story in a journal.
[39:36] The biggest thing she learned from this experience was to have faith.
[41:43] If you're struggling or going through a dilemma, find someone else going through that dilemma and help them. Praying and faith helps families during these trying times.
[42:41] If you can help someone else through a situation, things will turn around for you.
[43:01] Crystal believed that they were placed their divinely for some of the other families.
[43:42] God knew what Crystal needed, but he also knew that she could help someone else and that would renew her.
[45:16] How God always completes the picture.
[46:40] God was preparing Crystal to help other women and parents in need. This story will give women hope to pray.
[47:21] Don't stop believing and don't stop praying.
[49:07] The lightning round…
[51:33] The closing of the When Hope Is Your Name chapter.

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Live Known Jun 12, 2018

Show notes

I am broadcasting live from the Social Event of the Season. Even though I had been planning and talking about the event, I got nervous right before and even considered not going. The event turned out to be even more beautiful, precious, and fun than I thought it would be. It was everything I wanted it to be and more.

The theme for the event was Live Known and that is something that has been resonating with me often. I am comfortably seated on a recliner and speaking about Live Known. It's a conversation between me and my many hundreds of newest closest friends. If you are tired of hiding and standing on the sidelines of your very own life, I suggest you join us next year for the social event of the season 2019.

You can find Melissa here:

Podcast Web Page Facebook Page @MsMelissaRadke on Instagram @msmelissaradke on Twitter

Show Notes

[02:47] The Social Event of the Season was filled with women from all over the United States.
[02:53] By the end of the week, these women who didn't know each other were exchanging emails, pictures, selfies, phone numbers, and hugs.
[03:09] Live Known is what you will be hearing about today. This is a conversation between me and my hundreds of newest closest friends.
[04:14] If you are tired of hiding and standing on the sidelines of your very own life, I suggest you join us next year for the Social Event of the Season 2019.
[04:44] How it's a popular choice to live a life but not really Live Known. It is functional to just exist.
[05:10] A life like that will get you from point A to point B. Just getting from A to B is not the type of life I want for you.
[06:08] The essence of truly living is found within the whole context of scripture.
[07:15] The whole of scripture is about living a life and doing something that you never thought you would be able to do.
[08:53] You are made from a love that cannot be contained. What if the life that we are given was meant to be lived authentically?
[10:57] What does it really mean to live known?
[11:24] Catfishing means to lure someone into a relationship by means of a fictional online persona.
[12:09] One in five smartphone searches are for pornography. 68% of divorces are from one spouse falling in love with someone knows over the Internet.
[14:01] It's easy to hide. We can hide behind our screens, our husbands, our kids, or anything. It is easy. We can just lie and deny.
[15:29] The problem with hiding when we are unsatisfied is that we are refusing to take responsibility for things that seem like letdowns.
[17:14] To live known let's just tell the truth.
[18:29] My counselor told me it was time to stop throwing and attending baby showers while grieving for loss.
[19:30] I began to tell the truth.
[19:57] How to Live Known.
[19:57] 1. Come to a full understanding of who you are.
[22:16] Who you are is far more valuable than what you want. You have to start with who you are.
[23:06] We are what we believe we are.
[24:31] 2. Learn whose you are. Who do you belong to? Where does your loyalty lie?
[25:21] I'm older and wiser, and I'm all in. I've seen the world, and I'm done fooling around.
[25:47] Jesus is home base and I always go back to home base.
[26:27] 3. We must know where we are.
[27:44] We are all in. We have started a new business, and we are all in. We have spent a lot of money on online promotion, and we are broke half the time, but man we are having a lot of fun.
[28:25] Let's just tell the truth. If we are broke, sick, have hurt feelings or feel left out just tell the truth.
[28:46] If you know whose you are then where you are is just momentary.
[28:59] 4. We have to be okay with who comes along and who doesn't. It is okay to let people go who aren't friends.
[30:11] "They didn't leave your life, I moved them." God
[31:07] I set boundaries with my family, and I believe our relationship is getting healthier because of the boundaries that I set.
[31:22] If they love you, it'll be a little bit of a change, but they'll stick around and everyone will be the better for it.
[31:40] You are the sum of your five closest friends. Show me your friends and I'll show you your future.
[31:54] My future is going places as is yours. Choose wisely my friends.

Thanks for joining us on Ordinary People Ordinary Things. Be sure to subscribe to our podcast on iTunes and leave a nice review. Just like your mother taught you.

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How to Talk to Your Kids About Sex Without Crying Jun 05, 2018

Show notes

Today's episode isn't child friendly. Listen to it when the kids aren't around or when you have your headphones on. I kick off this show with a story about how I tried to have a talk about sex with my daughter Remi. I thought it was going well except for the part where she was curled up on the floorboard of the car and the confusion about whether the people were naked or not. This is why I brought in my friend and nurse practitioner Katherine Diggs to talk about this important topic.

You can find Katherine here:

Katherine Diggs on Facebook

Show Notes

[00:56] The night I talked to Remi Hope about sex. All of the women in the family were decorating for a wedding reception, and I thought I would take Remi out to a nice dinner afterwards.
[01:22] Remi wanted to go through the Burger King drive-thru. I began to tell Remi what a condom was and she physically curled up in the floorboard of the car.
[01:33] She ordered her meal from the floorboard of the car with a colorless look of shock and fear on her face.
[01:46] As we drove home, I became more bold in my approach and decided to tell her everything.
[02:20] After all of this we get home and I ask her if she has any questions. Her question was does it hurt for the man. Once the confusion about about people being naked was cleared up, it was time to really talk.
[03:09] Katherine Diggs is one of my best friends. She is a nurse practitioner for all things female and sexual. This is what she does for a living, and I'm super excited to have her on the show.
[03:55] Katherine was a labor & delivery nurse for years. Then she went back to school and became a nurse practitioner for women's health. She screens for breast and cervical cancer. Along with STD screening.
[04:40] She works at a community health clinic and takes care of high-risk ladies.
[04:54] She has had a lot of opportunities to educate kids.
[05:09] She talks to everyone across the board about sex, their bodies, when to be screened, and related sexual health topics.
[05:26] Public health is everybody. I take care of women who don't have access to health insurance or whose circumstances have changed. I want to give these ladies good care and want them to know that they are welcome.
[06:42] Katherine believes that women deserve the right to the best healthcare and the best options available to them.
[07:09] Katherine was nervous to talk to the boys, but they ended up being more vulnerable than the girls were.
[08:26] Katherine has a beautiful 13-year-old daughter and two 8-year-old twin girls who couldn't be more different from each other. The twins are in the same class as my son Rocco.
[10:33] As moms, I'm not sure we can adequately talk to her children about this type of stuff.
[11:40] The culture we live in now, cell phones, and how people have access to anything in a matter of seconds.
[12:02] Kids are even becoming addicted to pornography.
[12:13] How erectile dysfunction is common with men at certain ages. Now men in their twenties are having issues with erections because of the exposure to pornography.
[13:23] How normal women and everyday life may not seem as sexy compared to the unrealistic images.
[14:22] The importance of praying for the significant other of your babies.
[14:52] Katherine works two days a week and sees about 200 people a month. About 50% of these people have something. HIV is very real. She sees a lot of syphilis.
[15:52] The average age of an adolescent having sex is 17 years old.
[17:38] Sex is contact with genitals, mouths, or bottoms. Kids don't think oral sex is a big deal.
[19:17] Kids can live without sex. They can wait. They can save themselves for later.
[21:06] Many teenagers are becoming more experimental and adventurous.
[21:24] The concept of what sex is designed to be has changed.
[23:14] Sex is such a delicate topic. Parents need to be comfortable to be vulnerable and talk with their kids.
[24:49] The importance of holding your kids accountable.
[25:38] If you talk to your kids before they are 13 years old, you can be their biggest influence.
[27:31] How Katherine received a lot of backlash talking to a group of women about HPV.
[29:26] Parents need education and need to talk to their kids about sex. Knowledge is power. Give them the whys and the why nots.
[31:59] Some people don't even know how to put a condom. HPV can lead to cancer and be caused by skin to skin contact.
[32:43] The HPV shot is controversial, but HPV is an epidemic. The vaccine is good for 10 years. Eleven or twelve years old is the recommended age.
[35:57] HPV is a skin to skin virus. It's almost an epidemic. The vaccine is expensive, but there is funding for it.
[37:30] Be bold, be vulnerable,And being human. Let your kids know that sex is great when it is done as God intended. Teenagers aren't emotionally ready to have sex.
[39:05] Let's raise brave strong girls and righteous men of character.
[39:36] One of the best places to talk to your kids is in the car. Always keep it age-appropriate.
[42:12] The lightning round.
[45:01] Melissa's goal is to be open with her children.

For More Information:

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Big Mouth, Little City May 29, 2018

Show notes

I lived in Nashville Tennessee for 16 years. It was beautiful. There were rolling hills. We had four perfect seasons. The shopping and the culture were to die for. A friend visited me and said it was like being in a Hidden Valley Ranch commercial. It was beautiful and wonderful.

In spite of the culture and beauty, it's not the scenery of a town that plants you there, it's the people who you share that place with. Today's episode is about my home town of Lufkin, Texas and how sometimes we end up in the very place that we thought we needed to escape.

My friend and guest today is Tara Watson-Watkins the Lufkin Convention and Visitors Bureau Executive Director. Tara was Miss Texas and left Lufkin for ten years for school and her career. She has been back for 14 years and loves promoting Lufkin and small town life in general. Today, we talk about the advantages of small town life and living in Lufkin and similar small towns.

You can find Melissa here:

Podcast Web Page Facebook Page @MsMelissaRadke on Instagram @msmelissaradke on Twitter

Show Notes

[02:47] Tara Watson-Watkins loves Lufkin and loves being able to promote her hometown. She gets to tell people why they should visit Lufkin, and reminds the residents why they should love to be home.
[03:51] Tara was also Miss Texas. She truly has a love for Lufkin and small towns in general.
[04:02] Tara left Lufkin for ten years. She went to school at Texas Christian University and then worked at Pfizer pharmaceuticals and another company.
[04:23] Tara knew it was time to come home when her father passed away, and her mother had an accident falling off of a ladder.
[04:59] Tara has been home now for 14 years.
[05:16] How many women and young girls just want to get out of their small towns.
[05:48] Tara may go to bigger cities to shop and get her fix, but there is no better place than being home.
[06:11] What small-town life provides. There is such a networking opportunity of friends and family that aren't even blood relations.
[06:56] In a small town, it's important to take advantage of the opportunity to get to know people. Go into it with open eyes and an open heart.
[07:44] Moving back to Lufkin changed Melissa's outlook on everything.
[07:54] In a small town, you can have no blood relatives and yet have a community. Take the time to appreciate the heart of a small town.
[08:13] If you make the effort, people will make the effort with you. Embrace the people that are there, because small-town people are the best.
[09:04] How moving back to your hometown can be a culture shock and feel like starting over.
[09:37] Melissa decided to make herself approachable and started smiling at people.
[10:32] What Tara loves about Lufkin. It's a special town. Being a part of the community is a full circle moment for Tara. She loves being able to leave her car running and know it will be there when she gets back.
[12:19] In small towns, you also make friends who play jokes on you.
[12:47] The Lufkin community is the most giving community that Tara has ever been a part of.
[13:22] How the community comes together to make a difference.
[14:43] Lufkin is the home of Lufkin industries an oil and gas equipment company. It was the town's largest employer, but was purchased by a larger company and started outsourcing jobs. The town lost a lot of employment. Especially, when another employer Temple-Inland was acquired by International Paper.
[15:33] Because of these job losses, the city and Chamber of Commerce have been working hard to bring new industry to the town.
[16:31] Lufkin is bringing back jobs and industry.
[16:41] Lockheed Martin is also bringing in a new plant. There are definitely things on the horizon.
[17:49] When people say negative things about Lufkin, Melissa wants to engage.
[18:35] There are a lot of things for families to do in Lufkin.
[19:30] Tara wants her children to grow up appreciating their small town. She has worked hard to instill a sense of volunteering and giving back.
[23:23] Doing an educational push to shop local. All of Melissa's merchandise is produced locally. If they succeed, they are succeeding with Lufkin.
[27:21] A great story about when Tara was Miss Texas, and she went to Target and denied being Miss Texas.
[28:48] When Melissa was at The Dollar Store, a man was going to rob the store, but his wife was in line and prevented it.
[29:19] Tara shares a CVS story about discretely trying to buy a pregnancy test.
[30:53] Melissa's Red Ribbon Week video was on CNN and how a store clerk kept her grounded.
[33:57] The lightning round with Tara.

Thanks for joining us on Ordinary People Ordinary Things. Be sure to subscribe to our podcast on iTunes and leave a nice review. Just like your mother taught you.

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