More than Roommates

Latest Episodes:

Episode 73 - Strengthen Your Marriage Through Prayer (feat. Aaron Smith) Apr 23, 2024

Show notes

On this episode of More Than Roommates, Derek and Scott have an authentic and honest conversation with Aaron Smith from the ministry Marriage After God. We discuss pornography, intimacy issues, and the challenges many couples face. Aaron and his wife Jennifer hope to inspire individuals to draw closer to God and their spouse as they chase boldly after God’s purpose for their life together.

Scriptures:

Hebrews 4:15

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

Questions to Discuss:

1. How are you and your spouse doing at consistently praying together?

2. What’s one step you and your spouse can take to pray together on a more consistent basis?

Resources:

Aaron & Jennifer Smith’s Website – Marriage After God

The Smiths new book – The Marriage Gift: 365 Prayers for Our Marriage

Aaron and Jennifer Smith’s Marriage Podcast – Marriage After God

Episode 72 - Should Married Christians Have Celebrity Crushes? Apr 16, 2024

Show notes

In our culture, it’s extremely common for married people to have celebrity crushes—studies say 80% of married men and women have celebrity crushes. Does that make it okay for you or your spouse to have a celebrity crush? Should you have crushes on anyone besides your spouse?

Scriptures:

Proverbs 5:18-19

Romans 12:1-2, 13:14

Ephesians 5:3

1 Corinthians 6:18

Questions to Discuss:

Who’s the most famous person you’ve ever met? Why do you think we obsess about celebrities?

Why do you think people believe it’s acceptable to have a celebrity crush but not okay to have a crush on non-celebrities?

Tell your spouse what you love about them and then go crush on them!

Episode 71 - What Are Some Lies We Believe About Our Marriages? Apr 09, 2024

Show notes

We have an enemy who likes to feed us lies about marriage, temptation, and God’s design for relationships. The enemy actively tries to destroy our marriages, but as followers of Christ, the One we serve and follow is greater! We hope you’re encouraged by this new episode of More Than Roommates.

Scriptures:

1 Peter 5:8

John 10:10

1 Corinthians 13:5

Romans 5:8

Resources:

Book – The Screwtape Letters, by C.S. Lewis

Questions to Discuss:

1. Did you and your spouse write letters to each other during dating and engagement?

2. What are some of the lies you believe about yourself and about marriage?

3. What are some things that your spouse does ‘right’—focus on keeping track of what they do right and not wrong/annoying.

4. What are the times when you tend to be the most susceptible to believing lies or engaging in conflict with your spouse?

Episode 70 - What’s the Deal (and the Dangers) With Polyamory? Apr 02, 2024

Show notes

While this may not be the story for most of our marriages, polyamorous relationships (multiple romantic relationships with the consent of all involved) are gaining traction in culture. What do you need to know about polyamory and how can you protect your marriage?

Scriptures:

Isaiah 4:1

1 Peter 5:8

John 10:10

Resources:

Podcast – The Briefing with Albert Mohler – February 15, 2024

Book – Get Married, by Brad Wilcox

Article – “Couple to Throuple” Normalizes Polyamory, by Jim Denison

Questions to Discuss:

1. What are some ways you can “water your own garden” and pour into your own marriage?

2. Take a few moments to pray that God would protect your marriage from any polyamorous desires and pray the same for the marriages of your close friends and family.

3. Think about what you engage with in books, TV, and movies. How can these resources potentially fuel your desires in a harmful way? Discuss with your spouse.

Episode 69 - The Enneagram And Marriage (feat. Christa Hardin) Mar 26, 2024

Show notes

In this episode of More Than Roommates, we interview Counselor and Author Christa Hardin about her book and work with the enneagram. The enneagram is a helpful resource to help you learn more about yourself, your spouse, and your interactions in marriage and today we discuss how it can help you strengthen your marriage.

Scripture:

1 Peter 3:7

Resources:

Christa’s Book – Enneagram in Marriage, by Christa Hardin

Christa’s Podcast – The Enneagram and Marriage Podcast

Christa’s Website – Enneagram and Marriage and Follow Christa on Instagram

Questions to Discuss:

What is your enneagram number? Your spouse’s?

How is the enneagram a helpful tool to help you understand yourself and your spouse in a deeper way?

What’s one practical way you can serve and encourage your spouse today in their unique wiring?

Episode 68 - What Are You Currently Learning In Your Marriage? Mar 19, 2024

Show notes

In Part 2 of this series on being a learner in marriage, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott discuss different ways we can all learn in marriage and what we're each learning in our own marriages currently.

Scripture:

1 Peter 3:7

James 1:22-25

Resources:

Blog Post - Do You And Your Spouse Have Teachable And Humble Hearts In Marriage?

Book – The 5 Love Languages, by Gary Chapman

Questions to Discuss:

1. How do you learn? What kind of learner are you?

2. What is something you are learning in marriage right now?

3. What’s one way, today, you can choose to intentionally learn more about your spouse?

Episode 67 - What We Did And Didn't Learn in Premarital Counseling Mar 12, 2024

Show notes

In this episode of More Than Roommates, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott discuss what they did and didn’t learn in premarital counseling. Whether engaged or married for decades, we hope today’s new episode encourages and challenges you in your marriage.

Scriptures:

Proverbs 18:2

James 1:19

1 Corinthians 7:28

Resources:

Book – Tim Keller, The Meaning of Marriage: Facing the Complexities of Commitment with the Wisdom of God

Book – Scott Kedersha, Ready or Knot? 12 Conversations Every Couple Needs to Have before Marriage

Podcast – Episode 35 – How to Identify the Four Negative Horsemen of Communication and Conflict

Podcast – Episode 12 – How to Identify Negative Communication Patterns

Questions to Discuss:

When’s the last time you were really unprepared for something?

What are you glad you learned in premarital counseling?

What do you wish you had learned in premarital counseling?

Episode 66 - Do You and Your Spouse Talk More Than The Average Couple? Mar 05, 2024

Show notes

Multiple studies and articles show that the average couple talks to each other for only twenty minutes per week. In this episode, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott discuss practical ways to make time in your marriage to connect and communicate with each other. All healthy couples might intentionally fight for time together.

Scriptures:

Colossians 3:12-14

Matthew 18:15-17

Ephesians 4:29

Resources:

Blog Post - Do you talk more than the average couple?

Questions to Discuss:

1. Are you an internal or external processor? How about your spouse?

2. What are some ways you and your spouse can increase the amount of time you communicate with each other every week?

3. What consumes your thoughts right now? Discuss with your spouse.

Episode 65 - Being Real > Being Perfect (feat. Justin Davis) Feb 27, 2024

Show notes

In this episode of More Than Roommates, Scott interviews his friend Justin Davis. With candor and transparency, Justin shares he and his wife’s powerful marriage testimony and we discuss the value of authenticity in helping couples be so much more than just roommates.

Scriptures:

Proverbs 28:13

Genesis 2:25

Questions to Discuss:

Justin defined intimacy as being fully known emotionally, spiritually, and physically. How are you doing in marital intimacy?

Who’s more authentic in your marriage—you or your spouse? How can you grow in authenticity?

Resources:

Justin’s New Book – Being Real > Being Perfect: How Transparency Leads to Transformation

Justin & Trisha Davis’ Ministry – RefineUs Ministries

Justin & Trisha’s Marriage Story – Beyond Ordinary: When a Good Marriage Just Isn’t Good Enough

Justin & Trisha’s Podcast – Let’s Get Real with Justin and Trisha Davis

Episode 64 - Questions To Ask Your Spouse Every Week Feb 20, 2024

Show notes

One of the best ways you can grow your marriage is to set aside time every week to ask each other some intentional, specific questions. In this episode of More Than Roommates we discuss the weekly meeting and some questions you can ask each other every week.

Scriptures:

Genesis 2:25

2 Corinthians 12:9

Ephesians 5:15-16

Questions to Discuss:

What is God teaching you?

How can I serve you better this upcoming week?

How can I pray for you in the week ahead?

How can we make sure we make time for each other?

What's on our calendar in the next week?

Resources:

Blog Post - One Thing We Like To Do For Our Marriage Every Week