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Man Alive — Health
Man Alive

If you’re not satisfied with your love or sex-life, and could use some insights into what makes women want more of you, tell me more about yourself here and we’ll schedule a time to talk: shanajamescoaching.com/consult

Don’t forget to check out my new podcast, Practicing Love!
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Even men at the top of their game find themselves wanting more from life. Whether it’s more meaning, a bigger impact, unshakable confidence, a hotter sex life, more money, deeper love, solid friendships or a powerful legacy…

What is true success? How can a man actually reach the end of his life and look back without regret — having lived and loved fully, rather than having been stuck in fear or a life he was “supposed to” lead?
Man Alive is a series of bold, raw and gritty conversations with experts on success, power, sex, love and legacy for men who…are clear they want amazing lives?!

For the past 15 years Shana James, a dating and relationship expert, has worked with thousands of men and women around the world and collaborated with hundreds of teachers and coaches. She has led workshops for dating companies like Table for Six and Match.com and been matchmaker for an MTV reality show.

Shana doesn’t buy into the need for rules, games or limitations. She works with men individually to find their unique power, confidence and leadership abilities, breaking open the boxes that keep them stuck, dissatisfied, or settling for less than amazing in any area of life.

Latest Episodes:

#179: What to do With a Woman's Anger – Ilan Stephani Apr 08, 2021

Show notes

Anger is one of the scariest emotions for many people to feel. Often when it is expressed, it is not in a healthy way. But anger is important and we can't overlook it. It arises in moments when our boundaries are crossed, our needs are threatened or we feel disrespected. Today's Man Alive guest is a powerful example of a woman who has gone deep into her own pain to come out the other side with tools and understandings that work with the core of intense emotions and experiences. Ilan Stephani is the bestselling author of Skin and Games and a Somatic Researcher in the Fields of embodiment, sexuality, trauma, health and mysticism. She helps people unlearn cultural conditioning and gain back your natural orgasmic aliveness! Ilan helps us understand what to do with a woman's anger and your own.

In our conversation we discussed:

Why women can get so angry
Why it can be wise to hate your partner (and how to shift that!)
How mastering rage, "No," and "Stop" naturally leads to love
How sex becomes natural once people feel safe
Your body's role in helping you release anger and be more alive and connected

Ilan's work is a breath of fresh air and is powerful. These ideas may seem strange at first but she and I agreed that if more conservative methods worked, people would be experiencing a lot more love and connection than they are these days. We cannot only explore the light side of life. We all feel anger, fear and grief and we need to bring them to the surface, rather than holding them in and on our own.

Connect with Ilan Stephani www.ilanstephani.com

Connect with Shana James

shanajamescoaching.com/3ways

Curious what you'd need to become a better leader and lover? Take the quiz

For Women: Modern dating doesn't have to be a nightmare for women

#178: 7-Figure Business Lessons - Rylee Meek Apr 01, 2021

Show notes

You don't have to be the CEO of a business, to be the CEO of your life! The more you are following your visions, rather than the visions laid out by cultural or family expectations, the more you are the CEO of your life, and it will be meaningful, exciting, and successful.

Today's Man Alive podcast guest, Rylee Meek, founder and CEO of Social Dynamic Selling System, has taken many businesses to 7-figures and produced $80 in sales in the last eight years. He is also the author of Food For Thought: How to Use Dinner Seminar Marketing to Grow Your Business in Ways You Never Thought Possible. Whether you run your own business or want to become the CEO of your own life, this episode is full of the incredible wisdom Rylee has gleaned on his path.

In our conversation we discussed:

What it takes to not only grow a business but to create an inspiring life and legacy
The path to predictable, sustainable and scalable revenue
The language shifts you can make that create more and faster success
The keys to effective sales in business, that also work in romantic relationships(!)
How to avoid where most men get stuck in their business and financial journey

Connect with Rylee Meek https://ryleemeek.com/

Connect with Shana James

shanajamescoaching.com/3ways

Curious what you'd need to become a better leader and lover? Take the quiz

For Women: Modern dating doesn't have to be a nightmare for women

#177: Tap Into a More Powerful Masculinity – Ilan Ferdman Mar 25, 2021

Show notes

When you hear the word "Manhood," what do you think?

It may have a sense of power for you. It may seem suffocating or stifling. It may even be both at the same time.

Today's Man Alive podcast guest, Ilan Ferdman has done deep work and exploration around who he is beyond cultural constructs. He has even explored the Divine Masculine and shares his experiences of what it is and how it has impacted his life. Ilan understands that you are programmed into manhood and masculinity from the time you're born. The pressures and limitations are so much a part of "the water we swim in," it can be really hard to see or know where they come from.

Ilan is the co-founder of Satori Prime, a personal development, leadership and spiritual growth organization that has served more than 15,000 people with digital products, community events, coaching and corporate trainings. He is also co-host of the Old Souls and Seekers podcast, which blends life coaching, psychology, neuroscience, intuitive guidance and ancient energetic wisdom practices.

In our conversation we discussed:

A process for working with catastrophic thoughts and fear of failure
How to release the pressure of being the "rock" and provider, the one who holds it all on your shoulders
The benefit of slowing down to become even more effective
How to integrate masculine and feminine energies and what the divine masculine is
Ilan's story of losing it all and the gifts that resulted from finally getting honest

Connect with Ilan Ferdman www.SatoriPrime.com

Connect with Shana James

shanajamescoaching.com/3ways

Curious what you'd need to become a better leader and lover? Take the quiz

For Women: Modern dating doesn't have to be a nightmare for women

#176: Combining Success, Freedom, and Adventure – Jesse Krieger Mar 18, 2021

Show notes

In today's episode of the Man Alive, we have a guest who has traveled the world and created businesses based on his passions. Jesse Krieger is the author of Lifestyle Entrepreneur and is now the founder and publisher of Lifestyle Entrepreneurs Press, helping people with great ideas publish their books. Have you wondered whether the thousands of hours you spend each year working could be more enjoyable, or whether you could have more success or make more money doing what you love?

Would you like your work life to include more freedom and adventure? If you've set these aside to take on adult responsibilities, this is a good time to reassess.

The world has turned upside down and we are creating new ways to work that never before seemed possible. Now is a great time to envision what would be fun and meaningful in your future! Ultimately Jesse believes that being a lifestyle entrepreneur is about living creatively expressed and free, having a network of friends around the world and opportunities that present themselves in auspicious ways.

In our conversation we discussed:

First steps for entering the entrepreneurial world with low risk and high gain
Reframing the idea of risk to allow for less fear and more traction
How to get clear about your vision and mission -- the foundation of any business
Ways to ride the waves of instability that can come with entrepreneurship and business growth
How to start having more adventure and freedom wherever you are, before you start traveling for business

Connect with Jesse Krieger www.LifestyleEntrepreneursPress.com www.publishizer.com

Connect with Shana James

shanajamescoaching.com/3ways

Curious what you'd need to become a better leader and lover? Take the quiz

For Women: Modern dating doesn't have to be a nightmare for women

#175: Why Most People Struggle in Love - Riana Milne Mar 11, 2021

Show notes

Today's Man Alive podcast guest, Riana Milne, MA, CCTP, is a Life, Love and Trauma Recovery Coach who has appeared on CBS, NBC, ABC, Fox News. She is an author for top media outlets like eHarmony and Digital Romance. Riana specializes in helping people with childhood and love trauma heal and have the love they deserve. You may have wondered what you're doing wrong and why you're falling into the same conflicts or patterns over the years. You may have even beat yourself up about it.

Research shows 90% of all adults suffer in love. You are not alone!

The reality is, most of us receive hardly any education in communication, emotional intelligence, eroticism or sex. You are not set up to thrive in love. The good news is it's not your fault. This can be fixed.

In our Man Alive conversation we discussed:

The top 10 childhood traumas that negatively impact adult relationships
Some signs that you or your partner has past trauma that is sabotaging your relationship
Why and how you can break free from toxic and unsatisfying relationship patterns you've repeatedly experienced
The foundations of conscious love and communication
Questions to ask, as you're getting to know someone, that clarify whether they can create a healthy relationship

Connect with Riana Milne Website: https://RianaMilne.com

Success in Dating Program: https://shanajames.krtra.com/t/QAx91SKCqNCp

Connect with Shana James

Website: shanajamescoaching.com/3ways

Curious what you'd need to become a better leader and lover? Take the quiz

For Women: Modern dating doesn't have to be a nightmare for women

#174: How to Avoid Going Broke - William Matthews Mar 04, 2021

Show notes

Today's Man Alive podcast guest, William Matthews, is the author of three books, including Financial Lessons Learned From My Broke @$$ Friends. He brings lightness, humor and practicality to the financial domain, to help you make smart decisions with your money. It's important to be current with yourself about how you're doing with money these days. Are you making as much as you need? Are you saving for your future? Do you have a clear sense of a financial plan in the short and long term? Money is one of the greatest causes of stress people face. It's stressful on its own and then navigating it with a romantic, or business, partner magnifies that stress. Having clarity and plans with your finances reduces stress and allows you to strategize and navigate out of financial hardship. But most of us never learned how to create this clarity! Most education, at least in the U.S., does not include financial literacy. In our Man Alive conversation we discussed:

Common financial pitfalls and how to avoid them
How to set yourself up for a more secure financial future
Tips to save and be more conscious about how you spend your money
Options for borrowing money when you don't have it on hand
Why you may not want to close your credit card and other tips for managing debt

Connect with Will Matthews Website: https://www.linkedin.com/in/will-s-matthews-b392b876/ Connect with Shana James Website: shanajamescoaching.com/3ways Curious what you'd need to become a better leader and lover? Take the quiz For Women: Modern dating doesn't have to be a nightmare for women

#173: Andropause and Peak Performance - Dr. Nell Smircina Feb 25, 2021

Show notes

Today's Man Alive podcast guest, Dr. Nell Smircina, said Andropause can start as early as your 30's these days. But wait, do you know what Andropause is? Most men don't and it's important that you do! Andropause can be likened to a woman's experience of menopause. It's very common in our culture to talk about women's hormonal phases but we rarely talk about men's and it's so important! I can't believe I'd never heard of Andropause, and neither have many men I asked about it. If you are struggling with brain fog, tiredness, lowered libido, midday exhaustion, or generally not feeling like yourself, this is something to look into.

Dr. Nell has a Doctorate in Acupuncture and Traditional Oriental Medicine, as well as many other degrees. With a predominantly male patient base, she became interested in this critical phase in a man's life. She created PIQUE Health for Men where she also focuses how to help men achieve peak performance, based on their individual needs with work and lifestyle.

In our Man Alive conversation we discussed:

What Andropause is and how to treat it
How to be truly healthy, beyond the western medical model (which often leaves men struggling and confused)
The 3 Pillars of Peak Performance and surprising ways to optimize your performance
The keys to both mental and physical stamina
How to stop settling for brain fog, weight gain, exhaustion or low libido as a fact of getting older

Connect with Dr. Nell Website: piquebh.com

Connect with Shana James Website: shanajamescoaching.com/3ways

Curious what you'd need to become a better leader and lover? Take the quiz

For Women: Modern dating doesn't have to be a nightmare for women

#172: Overcome Fear and Boost Success - David Wood Feb 18, 2021

Show notes

On today's Man Alive podcast episode I was joined by David Wood, a former Consulting Actuary to Fortune 100 companies who became #1 on Google for "life coaching," serving 150,000 coaches around the world. David specializes in helping people overcome their fears and reach their goals. To have an amazing career and relationships, a life full of passion, connection and adventure, it is inevitable that you will face fear at some point. Everyone does. The question is, what then? How do you move through fear so you don't miss precious opportunities? David believes that the tough conversations we avoid are our doorways to confidence, success, and love. They become the defining moments that shape our lives. He coaches high performing entrepreneurs, executives and teams – and even prison inmates – to create amazing results and deep connection, as well as to achieve more, by focusing on less. We discussed:

How to shift your relationship with fear so it doesn't keep you stuck and unsatisfied
Why fear tends to stop people but doesn't have to stop you
When to move through fear and when to stop and nurture yourself
How to share about your fear with others to create more connection rather than less
What's possible when you let go of the fear of how you're seen or perceived

When you're done with this episode, check out David's first Man Alive podcast episode on How to Live a Regret Free Life. Connect with David Wood Website: https://focus.ceo/ Connect with Shana James Website: shanajamescoaching.com/3ways Curious what you'd need to become a better leader and lover? Take the quiz For Women: Modern dating doesn't have to be a nightmare for women

#171: Building Healthy Masculinity - Ted Bunch Feb 11, 2021

Show notes

Today's Man Alive podcast guest, Ted Bunch, is the Chief Development Officer of A Call to Men. He is a leading voice on male socialization, the intersection of masculinity and violence, and healthy, respectful manhood. Ted is the co-author of The Book of Dares: 100 Ways For Boys to be Kind, Bold and Brave. The book has been called "a direct answer to parents' cries for building healthy masculinity, respect, and emotional literacy in their sons."

Many men did not grow up feeling safe to reveal all parts of themselves. They are then tempted to hide their hopes, fears, desires and emotions.

The Man Box is now understood as a way to view the limiting persona and characteristics many men have been trained to emulate. Whether its parents, teachers, media, or the culture, the message has been clear for many generations: In order to be manly, you have to be strong and tough. You can't fall apart, need help or ask for it.

Thankfully times are changing. You are likely seeing and hearing more organizations and people talking about the importance of welcoming men's vulnerability. Today's conversation is an important one to support men to be free from cultural limitations, creating more safety and well-being for all. We discussed:

How being socialized into cultures of sexism hurts everyone, including men
Ways to welcome your kids emotions and authenticity
What it will take to decrease the astronomical rate of men's anxiety, depression and suicide
The importance of speaking up rather than staying silent
The Book of Dares and integrating A Call to Men's principles into communities

When you're done with this episode, I highly recommend watching my TEDx talk called: What 1,000 Men's Tears Reveal About the Crisis Between Men and Women. It's important that you're supported in your vulnerability and this talk is a great first step. Men and women have expressed how helpful this was for them to hear!

Connect with Ted Website: https://www.acalltomen.org/

Connect with Shana James

Website: shanajamescoaching.com/3ways

Curious what you'd need to become a better leader and lover? Take the quiz

For Women: Modern dating doesn't have to be a nightmare for women

#170: Why Men Need Community - Dominick Quartuccio and Bryan Stace Feb 04, 2021

Show notes

Today's Man Alive podcast guests, Dominick Quartuccio and Bryan Stace, are the founders of the Great Man Within Podcast and community. Each has their own story of resisting men's groups, but fast forward a few years and each has found incredible support, strength and freedom as they've joined communities of men.

Many men have "shoot the shit over beers" relationships, or "hang out and play sports" relationships with other men in their lives. And it's common, when men first hear about men's groups, to think "hell no, I don't want any of that emotional shit," or "No way am I going to 'open up' about my struggles or secrets with other men."

Whether it's a men's group, or hanging out with men in a way that goes beyond shooting the shit, time with men is vital to your well-being and success as a man.

In this conversation we talked about:

The sense of emptiness or deadness men, who are doing everything they thought they should, often feel
Why taking the lone-wolf path is slower and less effective than being part of a community of men
The power of seeing another man express emotions and realizing you're not the only one who feels that way
Why men resist joining communities of men
The role of competition in both men's success AND unhappiness

Connect with Dominick and Bryan Website: https://www.thegreatmanmastermind.com/your-guide

Connect with Shana James

Website: shanajamescoaching.com/3ways

Curious what you'd need to become a better leader and lover? Take the quiz

For Women: Modern dating doesn't have to be a nightmare for women

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